Bored Panda works better on our iPhone app
Continue in app Continue in browser

Add post form topAdd Post
Tooltip close

The Bored Panda iOS app is live! Fight boredom with iPhones and iPads here.

Artist Learns MIL Gave Her Services As A Present To Her Friends Without Her Consent
201

Artist Learns MIL Gave Her Services As A Present To Her Friends Without Her Consent

ADVERTISEMENT

Getting everyone the Christmas gifts that they would love can be a nuisance. Especially when the recipient list starts expanding even without your knowledge!

A few days ago, one artistic woman made a post on Reddit, venting about her mother-in-law: the lady secretly promised her friends that she would create them paintings for free during the holiday season.

The woman learned about this only when the requests started coming in, and said that it added unexpected stress to an already hectic time of the year.

RELATED:

    When Christmas and in-laws converge, the joyous season can quickly get entangled in all sorts of complications

    Image credits: Tima Miroshnichenko (not the actual photo)

    For this artist, they came in the form of unsolicited free painting requests

    ADVERTISEMENT

    Image credits: Karolina Grabowska (not the actual photo)

    ADVERTISEMENT

    Image credits: anon

    ADVERTISEMENT

    Image credits: cottonbro studio (not the actual photo)

    Probably most of us can empathize with the author of the Reddit post.

    For example, in the United States, nearly nine in ten (89%) adults say that concerns such as not having enough money, missing loved ones, and anticipating family conflict cause them stress at this time of year, according to the results of a new survey by the American Psychological Association (APA).

    While nearly half of Americans (49%) would describe their stress levels during the traditional holiday season between November and January as “moderate,” around two in five (41%) claim their stress increases during this time compared with other points in the year.

    Moreover, 43% say that it interferes with their ability to enjoy the holidays and 36% say these days feel like a competition.

    However, if the lady from the Reddit post couldn’t afford to commission her daughter-in-law to do the paintings, she could’ve at least considered other options that align with her financial capabilities. After all, we don’t need to get people expensive things to show that we care about them.

    “Test it out—go and poll 10 people about the holiday season. Ask them how they feel about gift buying. My guess is the majority would like to spend less and make it more about people than about the gifts,” Manhattan psychotherapist and performance coach Jonathan Alpert told Bored Panda.

    ADVERTISEMENT

    “Accept the notion that materialism is not an expression of what the holidays truly represent, nor do extravagance and expensive gifts equal happiness,” he advised everyone who wants to enjoy the holidays and not get caught up in the consumerism frenzy.

    Alpert, who is also the author of the book ‘Be Fearless: Change Your Life in 28 Days,’ said we can set an example for our loved ones by doing something that reflects our beliefs. “Be creative by making greeting cards and giving homemade gift certificates to your friends and family, spelling out how you’ll treat them.”

    “For example, offer to spruce up your parents’ yard come Springtime, help your sister with babysitting, or make a home-cooked dinner for a friend. In lieu of cheesy grab bags at the office party, suggest donating to a worthy charity.”

    “Keep in mind that the most memorable gift you can give someone is an experience, not a material item,” he added. “People remember activities and experiences long after the fleeting excitement of a toy, article of clothing, or other material gift.”

    When family members with different expectations and communication styles come together, it’s important to remember what feels good and what actually matters.

    ADVERTISEMENT

    I’m willing to bet that exploiting each other’s work to please someone from the outside isn’t it!

    The woman’s post inspired a heated discussion on family dynamics, holiday expectations, and the value of work

    ADVERTISEMENT
    Share on Facebook
    Rokas Laurinavičius

    Rokas Laurinavičius

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    Read more »

    Rokas is a writer at Bored Panda with a BA in Communication. After working for a sculptor, he fell in love with visual storytelling and enjoys covering everything from TV shows (any Sopranos fans out there?) to photography. Throughout his years in Bored Panda, over 300 million people have read the posts he's written, which is probably more than he could count to.

    Read less »
    Rokas Laurinavičius

    Rokas Laurinavičius

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    Rokas is a writer at Bored Panda with a BA in Communication. After working for a sculptor, he fell in love with visual storytelling and enjoys covering everything from TV shows (any Sopranos fans out there?) to photography. Throughout his years in Bored Panda, over 300 million people have read the posts he's written, which is probably more than he could count to.

    Viktorija Ošikaitė

    Viktorija Ošikaitė

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    Read more »

    I'm a visual editor here at Bored Panda and I enjoy a good laugh. My work ranges from serious topics related to toxic work environments and relationship difficulties to humorous articles about online shopping fails and introvert memes. When I'm not at my work desk, checking if every single pixel is in the right place, I usually spend my free time playing board games, taking pictures, and watching documentaries

    Read less »

    Viktorija Ošikaitė

    Viktorija Ošikaitė

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    I'm a visual editor here at Bored Panda and I enjoy a good laugh. My work ranges from serious topics related to toxic work environments and relationship difficulties to humorous articles about online shopping fails and introvert memes. When I'm not at my work desk, checking if every single pixel is in the right place, I usually spend my free time playing board games, taking pictures, and watching documentaries

    What do you think ?
    Add photo comments
    POST
    Papa
    Community Member
    11 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My wife is mostly retired now, but she used to work as a clown, mostly at children's parties. It wasn't uncommon for people to suggest she work their event for exposure in lieu of pay. "I can't buy groceries with exposure."

    -
    Community Member
    11 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I've tried to buy groceries with exposure. The security guy told me to get dressed and never come back.

    Load More Replies...
    Lady Gypsy Rain
    Community Member
    11 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I do handmade jewelry, handmade cards and albums, candles, soaps, crochet, cross stitch, oil paintings and much more. On disability so I have all the time in the world. But, I'm on disability for many reasons and have been unable to do any of these beloved activities for three years. As much as my parents encourage me to get back to work and sell my work (I do get requests occasionally), they would never dream of asking me to do something like this. And for free? Supplies cost money and my time is valuable. At the most, they might ask me to commission something and pay me for it as a gift to whomever. But still, not without asking first. And I'm not award winning in any of it. The absolute gall!

    Sophie
    Community Member
    11 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm in a similar boat to you (very creative and on disability) I personally do most of my creations (beading, crotchet, painting etc.) when I'm not feeling well as it's the best distraction. I wish you the very best and I truly hope you have a few more good days this year ;)

    Load More Replies...
    Load More Comments
    Papa
    Community Member
    11 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My wife is mostly retired now, but she used to work as a clown, mostly at children's parties. It wasn't uncommon for people to suggest she work their event for exposure in lieu of pay. "I can't buy groceries with exposure."

    -
    Community Member
    11 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I've tried to buy groceries with exposure. The security guy told me to get dressed and never come back.

    Load More Replies...
    Lady Gypsy Rain
    Community Member
    11 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I do handmade jewelry, handmade cards and albums, candles, soaps, crochet, cross stitch, oil paintings and much more. On disability so I have all the time in the world. But, I'm on disability for many reasons and have been unable to do any of these beloved activities for three years. As much as my parents encourage me to get back to work and sell my work (I do get requests occasionally), they would never dream of asking me to do something like this. And for free? Supplies cost money and my time is valuable. At the most, they might ask me to commission something and pay me for it as a gift to whomever. But still, not without asking first. And I'm not award winning in any of it. The absolute gall!

    Sophie
    Community Member
    11 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm in a similar boat to you (very creative and on disability) I personally do most of my creations (beading, crotchet, painting etc.) when I'm not feeling well as it's the best distraction. I wish you the very best and I truly hope you have a few more good days this year ;)

    Load More Replies...
    Load More Comments
    You May Like
    Related on Bored Panda
    Related on Bored Panda
    Trending on Bored Panda
    Also on Bored Panda