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MIL Insists 5YO Change His B-Day Cake As She Doesn’t Like Chocolate, Is Stunned When He Refuses
Interview With Expert
People often say, “Teach them young”, and it makes sense, because the things we pick up during childhood remain with us forever. For instance, coming from a family of farmers, I will always remember how my parents taught me never to waste food, so I quietly ate my greens even when I hated them.
Even the Reddit user Western_Bag362 was trying to teach her son not to act entitled, so he stood up for his cake choice when his grandma didn’t like it. But the woman found it rude and refused to attend his birthday!
More info: Reddit
RELATED:
Kids will always remember the good, the bad, and the ugly things that they were taught during their childhood
Image credits: Ivan Samkov / Pexels (not the actual photo)
The poster agreed when her 5-year-old said he wanted a chocolate cake with chocolate icing for his birthday, but grandma didn’t like it and said he should get a different one
Image credits: Western_Bag362
Image credits: Darko Trajković / Pexels (not the actual photo)
The kid replied that it was his birthday and she didn’t get a say, which the poster had said to him when he complained about the cake at someone’s birthday
Image credits: Western_Bag362
Image credits: krakenimages.com / Freepik (not the actual photo)
Grandma didn’t like it and insulted the poster, who replied she won’t be invited to the party with that attitude, so the lady told her son about this “rude” behavior
Image credits: Western_Bag362
The woman then threatened that unless the kid writes her a sorry note, she won’t give him a gift or come to the party, but the poster said that it was all on her
In today’s story, the original poster (OP) tells us how her mother-in-law conflicted with her parenting style all over a chocolate cake! The poster’s 5-year-old son’s birthday was coming up and she let him choose the cake of his choice, a chocolate cake with chocolate icing. But her mother-in-law, aka, the grandma, didn’t like it and said that he should get something that everyone likes.
To this, the little guy replied, “It’s not your birthday so you don’t get a say”, and this was not something out of the blue, because when he had complained about not liking a cake at someone’s birthday party, OP had said this to him. She had explained how the cake gets to be chosen by the one whose special day it is, but grandma was shocked by this.
She lashed out against the poster and even called the kid a “spoiled brat”, so OP told her that she wouldn’t be invited to the party with that attitude. Well, the entitled granny went and complained to her son about how “rude” the two were to her, so he said that he’d buy her the cake of her choice.
However, OP explained the whole situation to him, and as the couple have been teaching their son how not to act entitled and that not everything was about him, the man understood that the poster was right. Despite all the drama, granny didn’t come to her senses because she felt she was in the right.
In fact, she stated that she would not attend the child’s birthday party and wouldn’t give him a present if he didn’t give her a “sorry note”. Well, the poster told her that it was all on her, but oh, the poor child, he must’ve felt so torn in this adult conflict!
When the poster vented online, folks immediately sided with her and stated that she had done nothing wrong, but it really was the stuck-up grandma’s fault. They even went on to state that the grandma was acting like a 5-year-old, while the child sounded pretty mature for standing up for his choice.
Image credits: Ivan Samkov / Pexels (not the actual photo)
To get expert insights, Bored Panda reached out to Muskan Sharma—who has previous experience working as a counselor—for an interview. She mentioned that letting a child choose something as simple as their birthday cake gives them a sense of control and independence.
“It shows them that their opinions matter, which builds confidence and decision-making power. Of course, they still need guidance, but these small choices help them grow and learn how to make decisions,” she added.
When we asked her about the importance of teaching kids to not act entitled, she informed us that it is key to helping them grow into responsible, grounded adults. Muskan also stressed that when children learn that things don’t always come easy and that gratitude matters, they become more understanding and compassionate.
That’s how any parent would want their child to be, right? So, there was a good intention in what the poster was teaching her son, and it’s just unfortunate that the grandma wasn’t able to comprehend this simple thing. In fact, she acted the exact opposite by trying to control the kid’s birthday and make everything about her.
Muskan claimed, “When grandparents are too controlling, it can confuse the child about the authoritative figure, especially if it clashes with the parents’ rules. The child might feel unsure of who to listen to, which can affect their confidence. On the flip side, when grandparents are supportive without overstepping, they can be a wonderful source of love and stability.”
If only the grandma was more understanding of the situation, she would be able to see that her actions had a direct impact on the little one. On top of all the drama she created, the woman also threatened that she wasn’t going to attend the kid’s birthday party, and honestly, it sounds cruel to take the adult conflict out on him. After all, it was not his fault at all, because he was just practicing what he learned.
Muskan also emphasized that if a grandparent misses a birthday because of an issue with the parents, the child might feel really disappointed or think it’s their fault. She also expressed how it can hurt their feelings and cause tension in the family. Lastly, she advised that it’s very important for adults to keep their conflicts away from the kids.
What did you think of the story? Let us know in the comments below!
Folks online applauded the mom for teaching the right values to the kid and they didn’t hesitate to call out the grandma’s entitled behavior
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What do you think ?
SheamusFanFrom1987 2 months ago
One less grumpy old coot at the birthday and more choc cake to go around. I think that's a Won-It-All situation.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 2 months ago
Let's just say that, when you have an a-hole adult in your life who gets to have the kind of cake that THEY want on the KID's birthday, it can lead to an awful lot of resentment, unhappiness, anger, and sometimes, the kid still remembers it 30+ years later. Yes, I experienced this many times :p I cannot even fathom what went through MIL's mind that she thought she had ANY right to demand a certain cake type on her GRANDSON's birthday (barring allergies/gluten issues.) And I want to whap OP's husband on the back of the head just for SUGGESTING that MIL would get "her own" cake. MIL is a grown adult who can buy a cake any time she wants to! I know these things because I am an adult too! We can just buy a cake ANY TIME! No one makes you prove it's your birthday! What kind of horrid adult wants to take ANY iota of joy and happiness away from a 5-year-old on his birthday?
Ms.GB 2 months ago
What kind of Grandma wouldn't want their grandchild to be able to have their favorite cake or their birthday?! Most grandparents love their grandchildren and actually go overboard in spoiling them. This poor kid has a Grandma that thinks he's a spoiled brat to want to pick out the flavor of cake for HIS birthday party.
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SheamusFanFrom1987 2 months ago
One less grumpy old coot at the birthday and more choc cake to go around. I think that's a Won-It-All situation.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 2 months ago
Let's just say that, when you have an a-hole adult in your life who gets to have the kind of cake that THEY want on the KID's birthday, it can lead to an awful lot of resentment, unhappiness, anger, and sometimes, the kid still remembers it 30+ years later. Yes, I experienced this many times :p I cannot even fathom what went through MIL's mind that she thought she had ANY right to demand a certain cake type on her GRANDSON's birthday (barring allergies/gluten issues.) And I want to whap OP's husband on the back of the head just for SUGGESTING that MIL would get "her own" cake. MIL is a grown adult who can buy a cake any time she wants to! I know these things because I am an adult too! We can just buy a cake ANY TIME! No one makes you prove it's your birthday! What kind of horrid adult wants to take ANY iota of joy and happiness away from a 5-year-old on his birthday?
Ms.GB 2 months ago
What kind of Grandma wouldn't want their grandchild to be able to have their favorite cake or their birthday?! Most grandparents love their grandchildren and actually go overboard in spoiling them. This poor kid has a Grandma that thinks he's a spoiled brat to want to pick out the flavor of cake for HIS birthday party.
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