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This Person Explains Why Children From Abusive Families Analyze Every Single Detail And It’s Heartbreaking
It is a well-known fact our families are one of the guiding factors that shape our personalities while we’re growing up. Parents raise us to the best of their abilities, but these abilities may vary, and some poor kids grow up in more than unwanted household situations. Recently, Dawson, an LA-bases genderqueer writer shared a story about how growing up with mentally unstable parents can shape your personality and can even turn you into a person who over analyzes.
“I’ve been writing since I was old enough to spell, it is at the core of who I am as a person. I always joke that I write my tangled experiences and feelings into straight lines…which is why I write so much about my personal experiences from abusive relationships. It’s self-reflection and catharsis and storytelling and poetry and sharing. The sharing is important to me. Sometimes people write to tell me how much something I wrote impacted them or clarified something for them and that’s one of my biggest goals in my writing…for people to know they aren’t alone. Lonely as life can be…we’re out here. We’re surviving. And sometimes…that’s all you have to do. Stand up and say “I survived. You can too.” That’s the best I have to offer, I think,” Dawson told Bored Panda on his experiences of abusive parents and living in poverty as a kid.
Scroll down to read the full text on mental illness affected parents, raising kids and surviving it all.
More info: geekdawson | Facebook image credits: Mojpe, Steve White
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Dawson is a California-based writer who received a lot of attention online after sharing a short text
The story reflects on how growing up with mentally unstable parents can shape your personality
Image credits: bernafe
Many people were touched by Dawson’s text
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Juli Lawrence 6 years ago
I grew up with a narcissistic mother. I didn't realize how damaging this was until about 15 years ago. She committed suicide at 91. It was her last f* you to the family. We found a "hate" journal, full of every negative we children had ever done, in her opinion. It was evil. I lost my entire family when she died. I struggle every day with depression and anxiety, it is a never ending battle. Thank you for sharing your perspective. It is on target.
Aunt Messy 6 years ago
She sounds like a real charmer. My father committed suicide in 1997 - about a month after he discovered that no one wanted to be around him. He'd hurt everyone in his orbit so badly that even casual acquaintances refused to answer his phone calls. It wasn't his fault according to the note. It was mine.
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Mimi 6 years ago
I know the huge mood-antenna very well. And I knew where it came from, too. But I never thought of it to be a common and absolutely sense-making strategy of kids that had to deal with that kind of s**t. I admire the determination in the authors choice of ignoring subtext whatsoever. I try to, too but reading this inspired me to do it even stricter and with a better feeling of being allowed to make that choice. Thank you so much for sharing.
Amanda Ford 6 years ago
My husband has hyper-vigilance like this from his mentally and emotionally abusive step-father. He never knew if or when anything would come at him, there was never any real rhyme or reason to the punishments he received. He's calmed down a lot over the past 18 years, but he does have a debilitating anxiety disorder now, feels like "the world" is out to get him and is judging him, and every tiny anything on my face when we're talking means something negative, even when (as far as I'm aware) my face hasn't changed from one moment to the next.
Juli Lawrence 6 years ago
I grew up with a narcissistic mother. I didn't realize how damaging this was until about 15 years ago. She committed suicide at 91. It was her last f* you to the family. We found a "hate" journal, full of every negative we children had ever done, in her opinion. It was evil. I lost my entire family when she died. I struggle every day with depression and anxiety, it is a never ending battle. Thank you for sharing your perspective. It is on target.
Aunt Messy 6 years ago
She sounds like a real charmer. My father committed suicide in 1997 - about a month after he discovered that no one wanted to be around him. He'd hurt everyone in his orbit so badly that even casual acquaintances refused to answer his phone calls. It wasn't his fault according to the note. It was mine.
Load More Replies... Mimi 6 years ago
I know the huge mood-antenna very well. And I knew where it came from, too. But I never thought of it to be a common and absolutely sense-making strategy of kids that had to deal with that kind of s**t. I admire the determination in the authors choice of ignoring subtext whatsoever. I try to, too but reading this inspired me to do it even stricter and with a better feeling of being allowed to make that choice. Thank you so much for sharing.
Amanda Ford 6 years ago
My husband has hyper-vigilance like this from his mentally and emotionally abusive step-father. He never knew if or when anything would come at him, there was never any real rhyme or reason to the punishments he received. He's calmed down a lot over the past 18 years, but he does have a debilitating anxiety disorder now, feels like "the world" is out to get him and is judging him, and every tiny anything on my face when we're talking means something negative, even when (as far as I'm aware) my face hasn't changed from one moment to the next.
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