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Man Sees His Wife Berating His Employee Who Made A Mistake, Reminds Her She’s “Not The Boss” And Tells Her To Leave
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Man Sees His Wife Berating His Employee Who Made A Mistake, Reminds Her She’s “Not The Boss” And Tells Her To Leave

“You’re Not The Boss, I Am”: Man Tells His Co-Worker Wife She’s Not The Boss After She Explodes At One Of His Workers Over A Screw-Up“My Wife Was Livid”: Man Asks If He Was Wrong To Tell Wife She's “Not The Boss” After She Berated One Of His WorkersBusiness Owner Confronts Wife After She Yells At A Loyal Worker, Tells Her She's 'Not The Boss', Wonders If He Was Right To Do SoBusiness Owner Is Confused Whether He Had The Moral Right To Tell His Wife Man Asks If He Overreacted By Telling His Wife She's Man Tells His Wife She's Man Sees His Wife Exploiting Her Position And Berating His Employee, Tells Her She's Man Sees His Wife Berating His Employee Who Made A Mistake, Reminds Her She's Man Asks If He Was Wrong To Tell His Wife That She's 'Not The Boss' After She Yelled At A Senior EmployeeCompany Owner Asks If He Was Wrong To Yell At His Wife After She Berated One Of His Senior Workers
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Working with your spouse can put a serious strain on the relationship. From taking the workplace conflict home to navigating between unclearly defined roles, there are too many things that prove how working with your SO may not always be the best idea. And how could it not be, when a spouse’s personality directly influences our career success, as shown by this study.

And this story shows a glimpse into how spouse dynamics can go awry when an incident happens at work. A 41-year-old male has recently shared a post on r/AITA asking if he was wrong to tell his wife she’s not the boss of his company where they both work.

The conflict began when “one of my workers accidentally ordered 20 of one part instead of 2,” and when the author’s wife found out, she “absolutely BERATED this poor guy.” The author heard his wife yelling at him, and stepped in to take the matter into his own hands.

Let’s see the full story right below and be sure to share your opinion on the whole incident in the comment section!

RELATED:

    A man shared a story of how he told his colleague wife she’s not the boss after she yelled at their worker for screwing up

    Image credits: Yan Krukov (not the actual photo)

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    And this is what people had to comment on the whole situation

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    Austėja Akavickaitė

    Austėja Akavickaitė

    Author, Community member

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    Austėja is a Photo Editor at Bored Panda with a BA in Photography.

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    Austėja Akavickaitė

    Austėja Akavickaitė

    Author, Community member

    Austėja is a Photo Editor at Bored Panda with a BA in Photography.

    Liucija Adomaite

    Liucija Adomaite

    Author, Community member

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    Liucija Adomaite is a creative mind with years of experience in copywriting. She has a dynamic set of experiences from advertising, academia, and journalism. This time, she has set out on a journey to investigate the ways in which we communicate ideas on a large scale. Her current mission is to find a magic formula for how to make ideas, news, and other such things spread like a virus.

    Read less »

    Liucija Adomaite

    Liucija Adomaite

    Author, Community member

    Liucija Adomaite is a creative mind with years of experience in copywriting. She has a dynamic set of experiences from advertising, academia, and journalism. This time, she has set out on a journey to investigate the ways in which we communicate ideas on a large scale. Her current mission is to find a magic formula for how to make ideas, news, and other such things spread like a virus.

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    Aunt Messy
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is going to end in divorce. It will be fine. He doesn't need to spend his life with a crazy person on a hair trigger.

    AzKhaleesi
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It won't be fine if there's not a prenup. She sounds like the same kind of person that would cry about how she's accustom to a certain lifestyle and get alimony. I say she needs to grow the eff up and get her own career. Stop being a lazy bitch mooching off her husband's success. He was successful BEFORE they were together, they did NOT build this company together. Women like her make me sick and give women like me (us) a bad name.

    Load More Replies...
    Davomir
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    In Spain we have a saying that states: where is the cooking pot , don put your f**ng c*ck. That means dont involve close famaily in your business, otherwise things like that is going to happen...and it´s not the same to have an issue with a employee than with a familiar employee.

    Random Anon
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    NTA. I understand the motivation behind hiring your wife. After all, who can you trust more than your partner. However in my experience, this arrangement rarely work out unless the couple is able to compartmentalize, drawing a line between their professional and personal relationship. This is easier said than done, even for highly trained and experienced professionals.

    Nicola Roberts
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What his wife did was wrong on a human level, but why did she do it? We hear about the employee's good work ethic and good standing, but was she always pulling stunts like this, or was it a first? Everything in life is mediated even our own brains will pull trick on us but I can't help feeling we haven't had the full story.

    JessG
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    She did it because she knew it was an expensive screw up that would require paperwork that she would have to do. So, she was (in a way) defending her husbands company earnings, but also annoyed about extra work she'd have to do. She just went about it totally wrong, and went over her husbands head

    Load More Replies...
    Cassie
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    NEVER WORK WITH FAMILY. Do not hire family. Do not be hired by family. Work and family need to be separate relationships.

    WilvanderHeijden
    Community Member
    3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Another IATA story where's it's clear for everyone that the person asking the question certainly not is ts the @sshole. As someone stated before; Bp is becoming nothing more than a collection of tiktok-stupidy and Reddit IATA-posts. And the blanks are filled in with : "Empowered, strong woman shuts down ...... guys with ........"

    Carol Emory
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is why you don't work with your spouse or SO....especially if it's a situation of the business being established way before the relationship started.

    Cathelijne Van
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sorry but what is the point of this post? I came here for creative and funny content. The aita group on Reddit... I don't believe half of the stories there. Next to that you never know whether important details are left out, you never hear the other side of the story. BP ITA for posting this 😉

    Deanna Crichley
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I worked for a florist. When the husband was there, he never even bothered us. We knew what to do. When 'the wife' was there it all went to hell. She had no idea what we did. One day the owner came down from his office, and I was inside the cooler cleaning windows. There were flower deliveries that needed to be cleaned and put away, outgoing orders that needed address verification, and to be wrapped. The man was upset and wondered why I was cleaning windows. The wife said, 'we'll sell more if they're sparkling'. He yelled at her for putting me on that particular task, when we had actual sales to satisfy. She hated me after that. For following her order. My boyfriend worked there too. We would take the bus together and sit in a little park before work. My bf would walk down to the shop and come back to tell me if 'the wife' was there. One day, he said 'she's there' and I burst into tears. He sent me home, and we both quit that day. I got a great job the next day.

    Carol Emory
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I hope you were honest enough with the boss to let him know his wife was the reason you two quit. He may rethink his decision of having her run the shop.

    Load More Replies...
    Jess Hoffman
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And this ladies and gentlemen is why you don't let your significant other work for you.

    tiger lily
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why did this person have to put this online? Sort out your life in your own home.

    Deborah B
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    YTA - but not for the reasons you think. You're an asshole for letting your wife abuse your employee, and not firing her. You're an asshole for enabling her to be an asshole.

    James Phetteplace
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    A strong case for avoiding nepotism in the workplace. To add a layer of complexity, though - unless there was some prenup or the like, the spouse technically owns half of everything. That does gives her more authority than she was granted in this story. In no way does that excuse how she treated the worker.

    Nat Hedley
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Part ownership of a business is not the same as executive authority in the day to day management. She had no right to discipline staff even in an appropriate, professional manner, let alone by screaming abuse at them until they cry.

    Load More Replies...
    Brobro McDuderson
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The dude(Ette?) who said YTA for not firing her was right. His response was too weak, and what she did will have a negative impact on trust with the other employees for years. She needs to go.

    Arikan
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    We run a business with my husband but we are equals. I am in charge for operation issues, he is in charge for creative production. I don’t think we could handle a situation where we are employees of each other, not partners.

    Bee Diaz
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Your wife should be fired, she is clearly not fit to have employees, and thinks that she is a co-boss. Some spouses should not work together.

    LDYNREDD
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My hubby has owned a very successful business since long before we met. We decided that when the kids started school, I would work FOR him. We had a discussion before I started, the substance was that there can only be one boss. He started the business before I came around, he has created and run this successfully before I came around. He said would listen to my suggestions, ideas etc. but he would make the final decision. If any business acrimony started to affect our marriage, I would no longer work FOR him. We made the decision to work together, and that we would never let it come between us and our marriage. We had this discussion BEFORE I started working for him. I have been working for him for about 10 years now without issue. Most of the time he agrees with my suggestions and likes my ideas but I know when to step back and respect his decision even if it goes against my opinion. I am now indispensable to him and his business, there are many things he can't do without me.

    Maria Batsouri
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You don't have kids. It's an advantage when divorcing a crazy person.

    lara
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Firethebitch and think about a divorce. You might lose some money, but she is not worth the effort.

    El Dee
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Now you know why they tell you not to employ family, don't you. But now you have an insight into her personality that maybe you didn't have before. There is still time to ditch her..

    Id row
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This guy created a spoiled house cat who got bored, so she decided to screw with his business and he doesn't get rid of her. If they have a lost and found at his work, he should check to see if anyone found his spine.

    deanna woods
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My family doesn't own the business, but my mom, sister, and I all work together in a pizza buffet restaurant. On some occasions, my mom is the manager and she treats us like she would treat any other employee. She doesn't go on power trips and works really hard.

    Gogamash
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    that s why u shouldn t have a relationship with people u work with or vice versa

    Zoe
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I work with my husband in a small business. He worked the shop, I did the admin/finances/banking. It worked fine, until one of the team wanted to do more (she was a supervisor from the previous owner) but she was rubbish at supervising and didn't understand the computer system. My husband was good in the shop, customers loved him and he got on well with all the work team. But she wanted more. I gave he more, a Saturday morning, busiest day of the week and she screwed up. We knew she would. I talked to her at the end of her shift and said that to earn supervisor salary, she needed to put some time in and learn all the jobs. Did it like that, went to a union representative, they wanted a meeting, I had one with them, showed them her mistake, how I offered training, they told her she should do the training or lose some money. She didn't train, she lost money and tried to make things bad for us in the shop. We got the union back, they told her to be grateful we gave her this much time!

    Thorfin Wolfsbane
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Great story about your Karen wife, dude! Also, kinda weird how that first picture is a Karen yelling at the black employee who's apparently begging her?

    Kiki
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    according to this comment he let the wife get away with it I don't understand pls explain man-tells-...88adc5.jpg man-tells-wife-she-is-not-boss-after-she-berates-worker-11-608bb29732565__700-608c56088adc5.jpg

    Dodo
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He didn't fire or discipline her for what she did. That's letting her get away with it.

    Load More Replies...
    Easily Excitable Panda
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    NTA He asked her to leave the room, politely, THREE times. He's not doing some medieval "I'm the man, do what I say" thing - it's literally his business, and he's literally the boss.

    KitKatLord
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    NTA! Lol, I never put descriptions, so ima agree wif all the NTA peeps here

    Znaya
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is why husband and wives don't or can't work together in a position of power. What can be done if you want to save your marriage in my opinion is have a meeting and go over some rules and set some boundaries. She is not to cross any lines that deal with employees. Make no exceptions. As stated previously, had it been someone else you would have fired them. It's hard working with a spouse and then going or coming home to them, choices to be made 😠

    Casey McAlister
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Absolutely NTA. Even if she was a boss - yelling at your employee for an honest mistake that can be sorted out in one hour is beyond unprofessional. Doing so when you aren't actually their boss makes it even more unacceptable.

    Guido Pisano
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    work in the same place with someone you know (regardless who is) is never a good idea...

    Don't Look
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well, this isn't really about who is the asshole because everyone made a mistake and it's possible that it'll cost everything. The mans work should not have been allowed to mix with his personal life. He really shouldn't have hired her, at least not to work in the same office. She was bored. The truth is she really should have gone after another job... or better yet, do volunteer work. Volunteer work is usually more rewarding AND allows for possibilities to open up. That's really where this whole thing went south.

    KT
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    NTA,BUT, your wife needs to understand she is not your wife at work and she is not above the others. She is low seniority and a stunt like that you should possibly considering letting her go. She made your loyal employee cry ffs

    Scagsy
    Community Member
    3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    YTA. Nepotism is a poor recruitment tool for starters. Then there's a clear lack of job description and professional boundaries for the wife from the outset. This directly leads to her abusing a member of staff which is where HR step in. But you are HR. So you need to fire your wife or at least put her on an official warning about future conduct. As far as I can tell, you haven't. That's why it's very clear that YTA.

    SBW71
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    NTA but will become the A88hole if he doesn't divorce her. This is just bad all around

    Ivana
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    She should find employment else where. She could do anything because you don't need the money. Volunteer work, become an artist, write a book, train for marathons. If she just wants to get out of the house and be productive, then she can pick any occupation that doesn't require a degree because she doesn't need to worry about how much she gets in compensation. If money wasn't a thing for me, I would paint and volunteer for public defenders.

    Gabriele Alfredo Pini
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    1. If she doesn't want to sleep with you, she can go to the doghouse. Her decision 2. If you are a couple, this decision are to be made together: "Ok honey, now you go and act pissed with the client for the time he make us loose, then I enter and I sweet-talk him in paying a part of the overhead", not going behind your back for something you didn't want her to do.

    Chillace
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    NTA. im with the employee here, he seems like a really nice guy and i feel bad for him. plus hes worked more years there than she has.

    John C
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    About once a year my wife approaches the topic of now nice it would be if we worked together. She is a very smart and capable person, and I think I am too, but our approaches are wildly different. No way in hell would it work, and it surprises me that for as smart as she is she doesn't realize that this would be our future. Why screw up our marriage?

    kjorn
    Community Member
    3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    she crave for the power she got! clearly you are a better boss that she is!

    Laura Bamber
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    ESH but mostly the husband. His poor unprofessional management got him here. No one including this wife understands their role, responsibilities, accountability or discipline process. He needs to start running his company like real business, not a whim based fiefdom.

    Leodavinci
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    How on earth does anyone come to a conclusion like that based on the info provided?

    Load More Replies...
    Lily Mae Kitty
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    ESH: he spent so much time telling us why he's so much more important than his wife while saying it's unrelated. Of course it's related b/c it showed us how important and awesome he thinks he is while she is just a wife and can't get a decent job. He thinks he is so superior to her and it shows. Two employees fought b/c one employee thought they were the boss b/c they're married to the boss. She was so far out of line, she should be fired. He screamed at an employee in front of another employee and handled it so poorly. Her best bet is to apologize and find a job someone else where she'll understand her place as an employee.

    Troux
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I agree ESH, but what he was saying is unrelated is how he was well-established in his career and finances. He was setting the background that this was not a business that she helped to build. He built his own empire and made room in it to support his wife, then she took advantage of that on an authority trip. As someone else has said, he was in the wrong for being so lenient on her. This sounds like a termination in any other case, but I know that's a VERY tough decision for him to make.

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    Aunt Messy
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is going to end in divorce. It will be fine. He doesn't need to spend his life with a crazy person on a hair trigger.

    AzKhaleesi
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It won't be fine if there's not a prenup. She sounds like the same kind of person that would cry about how she's accustom to a certain lifestyle and get alimony. I say she needs to grow the eff up and get her own career. Stop being a lazy bitch mooching off her husband's success. He was successful BEFORE they were together, they did NOT build this company together. Women like her make me sick and give women like me (us) a bad name.

    Load More Replies...
    Davomir
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    In Spain we have a saying that states: where is the cooking pot , don put your f**ng c*ck. That means dont involve close famaily in your business, otherwise things like that is going to happen...and it´s not the same to have an issue with a employee than with a familiar employee.

    Random Anon
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    NTA. I understand the motivation behind hiring your wife. After all, who can you trust more than your partner. However in my experience, this arrangement rarely work out unless the couple is able to compartmentalize, drawing a line between their professional and personal relationship. This is easier said than done, even for highly trained and experienced professionals.

    Nicola Roberts
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What his wife did was wrong on a human level, but why did she do it? We hear about the employee's good work ethic and good standing, but was she always pulling stunts like this, or was it a first? Everything in life is mediated even our own brains will pull trick on us but I can't help feeling we haven't had the full story.

    JessG
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    She did it because she knew it was an expensive screw up that would require paperwork that she would have to do. So, she was (in a way) defending her husbands company earnings, but also annoyed about extra work she'd have to do. She just went about it totally wrong, and went over her husbands head

    Load More Replies...
    Cassie
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    NEVER WORK WITH FAMILY. Do not hire family. Do not be hired by family. Work and family need to be separate relationships.

    WilvanderHeijden
    Community Member
    3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Another IATA story where's it's clear for everyone that the person asking the question certainly not is ts the @sshole. As someone stated before; Bp is becoming nothing more than a collection of tiktok-stupidy and Reddit IATA-posts. And the blanks are filled in with : "Empowered, strong woman shuts down ...... guys with ........"

    Carol Emory
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is why you don't work with your spouse or SO....especially if it's a situation of the business being established way before the relationship started.

    Cathelijne Van
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sorry but what is the point of this post? I came here for creative and funny content. The aita group on Reddit... I don't believe half of the stories there. Next to that you never know whether important details are left out, you never hear the other side of the story. BP ITA for posting this 😉

    Deanna Crichley
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I worked for a florist. When the husband was there, he never even bothered us. We knew what to do. When 'the wife' was there it all went to hell. She had no idea what we did. One day the owner came down from his office, and I was inside the cooler cleaning windows. There were flower deliveries that needed to be cleaned and put away, outgoing orders that needed address verification, and to be wrapped. The man was upset and wondered why I was cleaning windows. The wife said, 'we'll sell more if they're sparkling'. He yelled at her for putting me on that particular task, when we had actual sales to satisfy. She hated me after that. For following her order. My boyfriend worked there too. We would take the bus together and sit in a little park before work. My bf would walk down to the shop and come back to tell me if 'the wife' was there. One day, he said 'she's there' and I burst into tears. He sent me home, and we both quit that day. I got a great job the next day.

    Carol Emory
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I hope you were honest enough with the boss to let him know his wife was the reason you two quit. He may rethink his decision of having her run the shop.

    Load More Replies...
    Jess Hoffman
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And this ladies and gentlemen is why you don't let your significant other work for you.

    tiger lily
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why did this person have to put this online? Sort out your life in your own home.

    Deborah B
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    YTA - but not for the reasons you think. You're an asshole for letting your wife abuse your employee, and not firing her. You're an asshole for enabling her to be an asshole.

    James Phetteplace
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    A strong case for avoiding nepotism in the workplace. To add a layer of complexity, though - unless there was some prenup or the like, the spouse technically owns half of everything. That does gives her more authority than she was granted in this story. In no way does that excuse how she treated the worker.

    Nat Hedley
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Part ownership of a business is not the same as executive authority in the day to day management. She had no right to discipline staff even in an appropriate, professional manner, let alone by screaming abuse at them until they cry.

    Load More Replies...
    Brobro McDuderson
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The dude(Ette?) who said YTA for not firing her was right. His response was too weak, and what she did will have a negative impact on trust with the other employees for years. She needs to go.

    Arikan
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    We run a business with my husband but we are equals. I am in charge for operation issues, he is in charge for creative production. I don’t think we could handle a situation where we are employees of each other, not partners.

    Bee Diaz
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Your wife should be fired, she is clearly not fit to have employees, and thinks that she is a co-boss. Some spouses should not work together.

    LDYNREDD
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My hubby has owned a very successful business since long before we met. We decided that when the kids started school, I would work FOR him. We had a discussion before I started, the substance was that there can only be one boss. He started the business before I came around, he has created and run this successfully before I came around. He said would listen to my suggestions, ideas etc. but he would make the final decision. If any business acrimony started to affect our marriage, I would no longer work FOR him. We made the decision to work together, and that we would never let it come between us and our marriage. We had this discussion BEFORE I started working for him. I have been working for him for about 10 years now without issue. Most of the time he agrees with my suggestions and likes my ideas but I know when to step back and respect his decision even if it goes against my opinion. I am now indispensable to him and his business, there are many things he can't do without me.

    Maria Batsouri
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You don't have kids. It's an advantage when divorcing a crazy person.

    lara
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Firethebitch and think about a divorce. You might lose some money, but she is not worth the effort.

    El Dee
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Now you know why they tell you not to employ family, don't you. But now you have an insight into her personality that maybe you didn't have before. There is still time to ditch her..

    Id row
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This guy created a spoiled house cat who got bored, so she decided to screw with his business and he doesn't get rid of her. If they have a lost and found at his work, he should check to see if anyone found his spine.

    deanna woods
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My family doesn't own the business, but my mom, sister, and I all work together in a pizza buffet restaurant. On some occasions, my mom is the manager and she treats us like she would treat any other employee. She doesn't go on power trips and works really hard.

    Gogamash
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    that s why u shouldn t have a relationship with people u work with or vice versa

    Zoe
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I work with my husband in a small business. He worked the shop, I did the admin/finances/banking. It worked fine, until one of the team wanted to do more (she was a supervisor from the previous owner) but she was rubbish at supervising and didn't understand the computer system. My husband was good in the shop, customers loved him and he got on well with all the work team. But she wanted more. I gave he more, a Saturday morning, busiest day of the week and she screwed up. We knew she would. I talked to her at the end of her shift and said that to earn supervisor salary, she needed to put some time in and learn all the jobs. Did it like that, went to a union representative, they wanted a meeting, I had one with them, showed them her mistake, how I offered training, they told her she should do the training or lose some money. She didn't train, she lost money and tried to make things bad for us in the shop. We got the union back, they told her to be grateful we gave her this much time!

    Thorfin Wolfsbane
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Great story about your Karen wife, dude! Also, kinda weird how that first picture is a Karen yelling at the black employee who's apparently begging her?

    Kiki
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    according to this comment he let the wife get away with it I don't understand pls explain man-tells-...88adc5.jpg man-tells-wife-she-is-not-boss-after-she-berates-worker-11-608bb29732565__700-608c56088adc5.jpg

    Dodo
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He didn't fire or discipline her for what she did. That's letting her get away with it.

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    Easily Excitable Panda
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    NTA He asked her to leave the room, politely, THREE times. He's not doing some medieval "I'm the man, do what I say" thing - it's literally his business, and he's literally the boss.

    KitKatLord
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    NTA! Lol, I never put descriptions, so ima agree wif all the NTA peeps here

    Znaya
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is why husband and wives don't or can't work together in a position of power. What can be done if you want to save your marriage in my opinion is have a meeting and go over some rules and set some boundaries. She is not to cross any lines that deal with employees. Make no exceptions. As stated previously, had it been someone else you would have fired them. It's hard working with a spouse and then going or coming home to them, choices to be made 😠

    Casey McAlister
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Absolutely NTA. Even if she was a boss - yelling at your employee for an honest mistake that can be sorted out in one hour is beyond unprofessional. Doing so when you aren't actually their boss makes it even more unacceptable.

    Guido Pisano
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    work in the same place with someone you know (regardless who is) is never a good idea...

    Don't Look
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well, this isn't really about who is the asshole because everyone made a mistake and it's possible that it'll cost everything. The mans work should not have been allowed to mix with his personal life. He really shouldn't have hired her, at least not to work in the same office. She was bored. The truth is she really should have gone after another job... or better yet, do volunteer work. Volunteer work is usually more rewarding AND allows for possibilities to open up. That's really where this whole thing went south.

    KT
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    NTA,BUT, your wife needs to understand she is not your wife at work and she is not above the others. She is low seniority and a stunt like that you should possibly considering letting her go. She made your loyal employee cry ffs

    Scagsy
    Community Member
    3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    YTA. Nepotism is a poor recruitment tool for starters. Then there's a clear lack of job description and professional boundaries for the wife from the outset. This directly leads to her abusing a member of staff which is where HR step in. But you are HR. So you need to fire your wife or at least put her on an official warning about future conduct. As far as I can tell, you haven't. That's why it's very clear that YTA.

    SBW71
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    NTA but will become the A88hole if he doesn't divorce her. This is just bad all around

    Ivana
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    She should find employment else where. She could do anything because you don't need the money. Volunteer work, become an artist, write a book, train for marathons. If she just wants to get out of the house and be productive, then she can pick any occupation that doesn't require a degree because she doesn't need to worry about how much she gets in compensation. If money wasn't a thing for me, I would paint and volunteer for public defenders.

    Gabriele Alfredo Pini
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    1. If she doesn't want to sleep with you, she can go to the doghouse. Her decision 2. If you are a couple, this decision are to be made together: "Ok honey, now you go and act pissed with the client for the time he make us loose, then I enter and I sweet-talk him in paying a part of the overhead", not going behind your back for something you didn't want her to do.

    Chillace
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    NTA. im with the employee here, he seems like a really nice guy and i feel bad for him. plus hes worked more years there than she has.

    John C
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    About once a year my wife approaches the topic of now nice it would be if we worked together. She is a very smart and capable person, and I think I am too, but our approaches are wildly different. No way in hell would it work, and it surprises me that for as smart as she is she doesn't realize that this would be our future. Why screw up our marriage?

    kjorn
    Community Member
    3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    she crave for the power she got! clearly you are a better boss that she is!

    Laura Bamber
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    ESH but mostly the husband. His poor unprofessional management got him here. No one including this wife understands their role, responsibilities, accountability or discipline process. He needs to start running his company like real business, not a whim based fiefdom.

    Leodavinci
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    How on earth does anyone come to a conclusion like that based on the info provided?

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    Lily Mae Kitty
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    ESH: he spent so much time telling us why he's so much more important than his wife while saying it's unrelated. Of course it's related b/c it showed us how important and awesome he thinks he is while she is just a wife and can't get a decent job. He thinks he is so superior to her and it shows. Two employees fought b/c one employee thought they were the boss b/c they're married to the boss. She was so far out of line, she should be fired. He screamed at an employee in front of another employee and handled it so poorly. Her best bet is to apologize and find a job someone else where she'll understand her place as an employee.

    Troux
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I agree ESH, but what he was saying is unrelated is how he was well-established in his career and finances. He was setting the background that this was not a business that she helped to build. He built his own empire and made room in it to support his wife, then she took advantage of that on an authority trip. As someone else has said, he was in the wrong for being so lenient on her. This sounds like a termination in any other case, but I know that's a VERY tough decision for him to make.

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