Bored Panda works better on our iPhone app
Continue in app Continue in browser

Add post form topAdd Post
Tooltip close

The Bored Panda iOS app is live! Fight boredom with iPhones and iPads here.

Man Comes Up With A Clever Way To Get Rid Of Jehovah’s Witnesses After His Black Cat Comes Up
User submission
114
29.6K

Man Comes Up With A Clever Way To Get Rid Of Jehovah’s Witnesses After His Black Cat Comes Up

Interview With Author Man Comes Up With A Clever Way To Get Rid Of Jehovah's Witnesses After His Black Cat Comes UpJehovah's Witnesses Leave And Never Come Back After Guy's Creative IdeaA Man And His Cat Got Hilarious Revenge On Door-To-Door Evangelists“Thanks, Missy The Cat”: Guy Saved From Jehovah’s Witnesses By Obedient Black Cat“I Find These People Annoying”: Man Creatively Gets Rid Of Jehovah’s Witnesses“Effective Elimination”: Guy Never Has To Deal With Jehovah’s Witnesses Again, Thanks To CatBlack Cat Works As A Paid Actress To Scare Jehovah's Witnesses Out Of Man's DoorwayGuy Scares Jehovah’s Witnesses Away And They Never Come BackBlack Cat Saves The Day After Seeing Owner Getting Annoyed By Jehovah’s WitnessesGuy's Cat Helps Him Scare Away Jehovah's Witnesses
ADVERTISEMENT

There are few things as annoying as the feeling of having one’s peace shattered because a smiling, yet uninvited guest has come to the door. Maybe they are selling knives, perhaps salvation, but either way, most of us would do almost anything to make them go away. Sometimes, fat itself decides to intervene on your behalf, if you can seize the moment.

A man was being pestered by a pair of Jehovah’s Witnesses so he decided to play a little joke on them. People applauded his creativity and shared their own experiences with door-to-door bothers. We got in touch with OP to learn more.

RELATED:

    Door-to-door preachers seem like a false flag operation to make people dislike a group

    Image credits: Jonathan Wells (not the actual photo)

    One man and his cat found a perfect way to make a pair of Jehovah’s Witnesses leave and never return

    ADVERTISEMENT
    ADVERTISEMENT

    Image credits: Scurvy64Dawg

    Image credits: Isis Chávez (not the actual photo)

    Most of us hate unexpected guests at the door

    Bored Panda got in touch with the wonderfully named Scurvy64Dawg and he was kind enough to briefly answer some of our questions. “When this happened we were on the receiving end of regular visits from Jehovah’s Witnesses – at least twice a year for many years. There may have been a rare local church a time or two, but nothing close to the JWs. Where I live now I still get the occasional religious group now and then, but mostly salesman these days. Some of these salespeople are very persistent, which actually forces me to be rude to get them to leave. I understand that just closing the door can bring things to an end, but that’s not an option when I’m working in the garage or the yard. A few commenters brought up the theory that door-to-door evangelism has nothing to do with recruitment and everything to do with showing their followers that the outside world will reject them, thus cementing their loyalty. I believe this theory myself, which is why I really don’t want to be rude to them. That and I know some of them don’t want to be doing this door-to-door bit either.”

    ADVERTISEMENT

    While the Jehovah’s Witnesses aren’t the only group to preach its message door to door, they are generally the best known. Indeed, if you see a clean, beardless, and generally well-dressed pair of people at your door, it’s a relatively safe bed that they will be telling you about the wonderfully dramatically named Watch Tower Society.

    What sets Jehovah’s Witnesses apart is the belief that they are separate from all other religions, including other branches and denominations of Christianity. As a result, a lifelong Christian might receive a visit from a JW, who will inquire if they have ever heard the gospel. This can be both irritating and bemusing, depending on one’s mentality.

    Going door to door, what they call “public preaching” is seen as a requirement for members of the church (generally called witnesses), hence the sheer numbers of recruits. They are often required to submit monthly reports, called “Field Service Reports,” to indicate how well (or poorly) they are doing. The performance meetings must be brutal if they are willing to put up with constant abuse and stonewalling from the public just to boost these numbers.

    ADVERTISEMENT

    Image credits: Samuel Peter (not the actual photo)

    JW’s believe that all members have to go door to door

    This practice has gone all the way back to 1920, although there is one important caveat. The main measurement of a “witness’s” effectiveness isn’t the conversion rate, it’s simply the number of hours they “worked.” As anyone with a commission-based job can confirm, hours worked don’t necessarily translate into anything productive.

    Indeed, one wonders if the JW’s have an incentive to not report “conversion rates.” One has to assume they are fairly low, given the general disdain most people have for them. It’s pretty easy to see just how hard it might be to convince new witnesses of the effectiveness of this practice if their success rate looks more like a rounding error.

    At the same time, it might not be that easy to measure a “conversion.” Would a person saying that they are interested to a witness count? They might be lying to get them to leave. If a person comes to a JW church (also dramatically named “Kingdom Halls”) on any given Sunday, can you attribute their presence to a door-to-door conversion? After all, most people are generally aware of Jehovah’s Witnesses in general.

    ADVERTISEMENT

    Image credits: Aubrey Odom (not the actual photo)

    OP lived many people’s dreams when he got revenge

    All in all, regardless of where you stand spiritually, the vast majority of us don’t want to be disturbed at home, much less by a physical person. An unexposed phone call is annoying enough, but getting a person at your door to leave can create a degree of antagonism so intense, it almost seems counterproductive for the proselytizer.

    Many people have no doubt dreamt of the sort of revenge OP pulled in this story. Indeed, based on some people’s reactions, these JW’s in particular got off easy. The comments, some of which can be found below, are full of other stories from people who answered the door and decided to put a stop to these pestering preachers.

    Folks shared their own, similar experiences

    ADVERTISEMENT
    ADVERTISEMENT
    Ic_polls

    Poll Question

    Thanks! Check out the results:

    30Kviews

    Share on Facebook
    Justin Sandberg

    Justin Sandberg

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    Read more »

    I am a writer at Bored Panda. Despite being born in the US, I ended up spending most of my life in Europe, from Latvia, Austria, and Georgia to finally settling in Lithuania. At Bored Panda, you’ll find me covering topics ranging from the cat meme of the day to red flags in the workplace and really anything else. In my free time, I enjoy hiking, beating other people at board games, cooking, good books, and bad films.

    Read less »
    Justin Sandberg

    Justin Sandberg

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    I am a writer at Bored Panda. Despite being born in the US, I ended up spending most of my life in Europe, from Latvia, Austria, and Georgia to finally settling in Lithuania. At Bored Panda, you’ll find me covering topics ranging from the cat meme of the day to red flags in the workplace and really anything else. In my free time, I enjoy hiking, beating other people at board games, cooking, good books, and bad films.

    Vėja Elkimavičiūtė

    Vėja Elkimavičiūtė

    Author, Community member

    Read more »

    I'm a visual editor at Bored Panda. Looking at pets and memes is the best part of my work. I love to travel and want to see the world. Still looking and exploring stuff I like and want to do so thats exciting... and sometimes not

    Read less »

    Vėja Elkimavičiūtė

    Vėja Elkimavičiūtė

    Author, Community member

    I'm a visual editor at Bored Panda. Looking at pets and memes is the best part of my work. I love to travel and want to see the world. Still looking and exploring stuff I like and want to do so thats exciting... and sometimes not

    What do you think ?
    Add photo comments
    POST
    Costa
    Community Member
    10 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If you get an email with the subject "Knock Knock" do NOT open it. It could be Jehova's Witnesses working from home.

    Zenozenobee
    Community Member
    10 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Don't joke about that , we did receive a lettre from a JW in our mail during the second lockdown.

    Load More Replies...
    Adrian
    Community Member
    10 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yet another reason to adopt a black cat! They spend more time in shelters than other cats. Hey, how about we go door to door and spread the word about the benefits of black cats!

    Kate
    Community Member
    10 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I already have a "black cats matter" T-shirt, I'd be happy to join you!

    Load More Replies...
    Rick Seiden
    Community Member
    10 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Can I talk to you about God?" "No thanks, I'm an atheist. Have a nice day." Works every time. I've entertained the idea of taking it one step further and replying with, "Only if I can talk to you about why there isn't a God," but that would require I actually follow through on it.

    Load More Comments
    Costa
    Community Member
    10 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If you get an email with the subject "Knock Knock" do NOT open it. It could be Jehova's Witnesses working from home.

    Zenozenobee
    Community Member
    10 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Don't joke about that , we did receive a lettre from a JW in our mail during the second lockdown.

    Load More Replies...
    Adrian
    Community Member
    10 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yet another reason to adopt a black cat! They spend more time in shelters than other cats. Hey, how about we go door to door and spread the word about the benefits of black cats!

    Kate
    Community Member
    10 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I already have a "black cats matter" T-shirt, I'd be happy to join you!

    Load More Replies...
    Rick Seiden
    Community Member
    10 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Can I talk to you about God?" "No thanks, I'm an atheist. Have a nice day." Works every time. I've entertained the idea of taking it one step further and replying with, "Only if I can talk to you about why there isn't a God," but that would require I actually follow through on it.

    Load More Comments
    You May Like
    Related on Bored Panda
    Related on Bored Panda
    Trending on Bored Panda
    Also on Bored Panda