Yeah everyone who says YTA needs to touch grass and I bet you would be infuriated if you spent your weekend doing things for the household and your partner, who was away on a fun weekend, didn't appreciate it. Also if the roles were reversed people would be up in arms.

OK. I have one thing to say, and I know a lot of you are not going to be on the same page as me with this, but I'm going to say it anyway: What is a shiplap???

Mutual appreciation is very important in any relationship.

Oh dear, the wife sounds like my mom. My dad painted the entire kitchen over 2 days. At the end, my mom said, "You missed a spot." Not a happy marriage.

She should have checked he was ok and thanked him for the effort because it's important for both sides to articulate that they have seen the work the other partner does. A little 'thank you' never hurts. BUT none of these things were 'for her'. They were all for the house and the children they share. These were his responsibility and not a present. So NTA for being disappointed at a lack of concern and appreciation but YTA for phrasing it like he was doing her a favour for which she should be grateful.

I'm appreciative of anything my husband does around the house! He's quite handy and it's nice that we rarely have to hire a contractor. We are not always on the same page as to priorities, but if he's doing the work, he wins. It can be frustrating, but not a big deal!

She was gine for a long weekene and she wasbt excitednto seem her family. I cant inagine this. Eveveryone needs anbrrak but who lives like thar?

If your wife isn’t able to get things done before you get home, do you reply with “you should’ve managed your time better?” Or “thanks… I guess”? I highly doubt it, and for her not show appreciation for anything is pretty ridiculous in my opinion. That’s not how a significant other should act. Because I lol bet you anything if the tables were turned, not one person would be on your side.

Op's wife hurt my feelings.

I worked full time. My husband worked two weeks away, two weeks home. If I ever had extra work or a chance to get away instead of my husband taking care of things, his Mum would come up and take care of everything including him. Like I can do it all while he is gone for work, but he couldn't handle anything on his days off.

Many signs that this is a temporary relationship.

Honestly both of them kinda suck here. He shouldn't have called it a surprise when it was a half finished project and minor things, and she shouldn't have been a sarcastic ah about it. I do have a feeling that if he'd just told her that he threw his back out while doing some chores she would have been happy about the stuff he did do. But framing it as some great thing waited for her when she got home and then showing her half finished or very basic things probably wasn't the best move.

I wonder if all of this comes down to his idea that he did all these things "for her" When it's actually for the family, for the kids, for the home It seems like a stupid distinction, but it's an attitude that can cause some serious problems. He did a lot of stuff, and she should have been appreciative of the work and empathetic about his back. But something about the idea that he fixed a broken drawer just for her, cleaned up his workshop *for her* makes me thing that there's something off here. A broken drawer is "for us" not "for her" unless it's her special mom only drawer or something. Cleaning up his workshop isn't something he did "out of the kindness of your heart" for her, it's something that needed doing and he did. It's his last comments about doing things *for others* and "*out of the kindness of their heart* that left a bad taste in my mouth. Like he was "treating" her to a garage without his mess in it

I would not stay with a partner who would behave so callously if I hurt.

I would say the couple in this story are both dillholes. first, the wife, for not understanding that throwing out their back is seriously painful and that pain can be a disability in itself. and the husband for not understanding why the wife might not be enthused to find a mess that she has to clean up later after a long, tiring trip back home, especially when said project isn't even done. I can imagine there being wood dust and everything going everywhere in the son's room. I feel that the two of them have very low emotional intelligence.

It appears as though it's time to cut your wife lose. She's reached a level of disrespect that she most likely won't come back from. Count your losses, get the divorce paperwork lined up, sign the damn things, and live your life with your kids.

I was a little underwhelmed by his surprise.

Errmm... HIS son's room repairs are not a surprise for her. He showed her what he did as a boy would show it to his mother. She's not his mother. They are partners. He should feel obligated to repair stuff at his own home and for his own family. Sometimes we have to sacrifice our "free time". Which is not free when you have a family. Sorry. All the comments of women "begging" their husbands to do anything at home. Sh*tty husbands, not a comparison material.