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When I first moved in with my partner, he had never owned (or even considered purchasing) a hand towel, an oven mitt, trivets, a spatula, kitchen scissors, more than 2 pieces of silverware, a laundry basket, a chef’s knife that’s actually sharp, or a cutting board big enough to cut anything larger than a lemon. Technically, yes you can survive just fine without any of those things. But my woman brain could not wrap my mind around why you wouldn’t have them when you easily could.

Moving in with someone for the first time teaches you many things about them: their eating habits, their sleeping habits, their cleaning routines (or lack thereof), what they consider to be loud, etc. But if that person is also of the opposite sex, you might be fascinated enough to do a case study in how the other half lives.

Below, we’ve gathered some of the most illuminating (and some slightly disturbing) things women learned from living with men for the first time that they've revealed on Reddit, and I have to say, men never cease to amaze me. From their quirks in the bathroom to the adorably charming ways they surprise their partners, this list is certainly a roller coaster. Be sure to upvote all of the responses that shock you, or that you also only knew from living with a man, and let us know in the comments if you have anything else to add to this list. Then, if you’re interested in hearing from the opposite side after finishing this piece, you can find a Bored Panda article highlighting what men learned from living with women right here!

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#1

“What Is The Most Surprising Thing You Learned When You Started Living With A Man?”: 30 Women Share What Shocked Them Well the first surprise was moving in with my Dad and I was shocked that he never cleaned or cooked. Had a maid for cleaning and ate out for every single one of his meals. And my goodness, men are good at painting the wall with their p**s.

The second surprise was moving in with my SO. Shocked to learn he is incredibly clean, able and willing to cook, and never gets p**s on the wall.

So I guess the thing I learned that would have been surprising to me as a teen is that all men are just as variable as women are. I blame my delay in realizing this on being raised in an all female home and not really having any male role models.

DaughterEarth , cottonbro studio Report

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Xottel
Xottel
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

A man that cleans is wise enough to sit down when peeing.

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#2

“What Is The Most Surprising Thing You Learned When You Started Living With A Man?”: 30 Women Share What Shocked Them We've been living together for over a year now, and I think my girlfriend is still shocked at how often I have an erection.
"We just had sex! Why are you hard again??"
"You were bending over..."

erockd , cottonbro studio Report

Final score:
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#3

“What Is The Most Surprising Thing You Learned When You Started Living With A Man?”: 30 Women Share What Shocked Them I learned that sometimes when a man is very very hungover he will take a sad sitting down shower. Discovered my fiancé sitting on the shower floor like a drowned snuffleupagus

Lebaneseblonde1 , Victor Furtuna Report

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#4

Besides my boyfriend, I've lived with plenty of men and what I've learned is that they're all different. Some are slobs, some are fastidious and clean, some are fussy and some have odd habits. It's almost like they're individual people with their own personalities. It's truly bizarre.

My BF is way fussier than I am though, I've noticed. I think I'm kind of a slob though, so it makes sense.

_Neps_ Report

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Robert Trebor
Robert Trebor
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"It's almost like they're individual people with their own personalities". Yay, you noticed!

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#5

Men don't like to just talk, they like to fix problems.

Men don't pay attention to details, they like to condense to essence. This is why a "how did your day go?" convo lasts twelve seconds.

A lot of men would prefer their women bottomless in a man's shirt than in some fancy lingerie that takes ten minutes to figure out how to dismantle.

Men do not need a lot of space for stuff, but the space they have is sacred and should not be encroached upon. Leave him his closet and his garage workshelf, and he'll be happy. If he insists on a mancave, best to let him have one and do not mock it.

Men are literally mystified by why it would take more than four minutes to get ready to go out. They are even more mystified why women would bother to go through that ritual if you're not going to see anyone you know when you go out.

For many, many, many men, words of praise, acknowledging accomplishment and stature, are the most generous acts of love you can provide.

Men literally become uncomfortable in their bodies without a sexual release after a couple days. It's not like they just don't think about it if it doesn't happen. If it doesn't happen, then that's all they can think about.

Odd_Bodkin Report

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Premislaus de Colo
Premislaus de Colo
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This one is actually a good example of what guys are like in general. Some other posts seem like concerning a particular person only

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#6

“What Is The Most Surprising Thing You Learned When You Started Living With A Man?”: 30 Women Share What Shocked Them How often men seem like they have something wrong, but they don't. For the first couple of months that we were living together I was convinced that he already hated living with me because there were so many times that he would zone out and not speak and give short answers.

Turns out that he would just have something on his mind completely unrelated to our relationship.

45MinutesOfRoadHead , Ketut Subiyanto Report

Final score:
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censorshipsucks
censorshipsucks
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

this is the most important thing to understand. If we want to complain we will do so. If we are quiet it means all is well.

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#7

“What Is The Most Surprising Thing You Learned When You Started Living With A Man?”: 30 Women Share What Shocked Them They have different "rules" about things. A shirt is not dirty unless it's smelly, wet, or has fresh stains on it. They'll wear it again before choosing to wash it. Making the bed every morning is not required, it's a waste of time. "But what if we have company?" "Why would they go look at our bed? If they did, what's wrong with it being unmade? They might *gasp!* know that we sleep there?" It's a lot of practicality and efficiency vs making things look nice and "wasting" time.

AbbyTheWondercunt , cottonbro studio Report

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#8

“What Is The Most Surprising Thing You Learned When You Started Living With A Man?”: 30 Women Share What Shocked Them They don't need 3 meals a day. They just need a giant meal once or twice.

LonelyJewOnXmas , Artem Podrez Report

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Natalie Bohrteller
Natalie Bohrteller
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Or they just eat all day and you wonder why they're not getting overweight. Life is unfair.

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#9

“What Is The Most Surprising Thing You Learned When You Started Living With A Man?”: 30 Women Share What Shocked Them This might be just specific to my boyfriend, but I was surprised at how much he was willing to compromise. He stopped leaving the toilet seat up, he hates vacuuming but he'll mop, and if I cook he cleans. I was honestly expecting cohabitating to be a real struggle, but it has strengthened our relationship tenfold.

chillhoneybunny28 , Buro Millennial Report

Final score:
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#10

“What Is The Most Surprising Thing You Learned When You Started Living With A Man?”: 30 Women Share What Shocked Them Pooping time is sacred and a great time to catch up on the news and browse some reddit.

Can be slightly inconvenient when I need the bathroom and he's been in there for 1/2 an hour though.

anon , RODNAE Productions Report

Final score:
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#11

“What Is The Most Surprising Thing You Learned When You Started Living With A Man?”: 30 Women Share What Shocked Them Despite his balding hair, he insists on buying voluminizing shampoo.

Babe, that's not going to fix it.

effexxor , Karolina Grabowska Report

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#12

“What Is The Most Surprising Thing You Learned When You Started Living With A Man?”: 30 Women Share What Shocked Them Most men don't have a garbage can in their bathroom.

Hey guys, if you want to impress your lady friends, put a god damn garbage can in the bathroom! We have stuff we need to put in there sometimes!

Costner_Facts , Pixabay Report

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Natalie Bohrteller
Natalie Bohrteller
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Totally true! And once there is one, he will use it most and never change the bag lol

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#13

“What Is The Most Surprising Thing You Learned When You Started Living With A Man?”: 30 Women Share What Shocked Them He can wiggle his penis.

You know how some people can wiggle their ears, or just the tip of their nose? If we're laying around in bed, he sometimes 'waves' at me.

I didn't know it could move that much on its own.

Blueninjakat , RAUL REYNOSO Report

Final score:
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#14

“What Is The Most Surprising Thing You Learned When You Started Living With A Man?”: 30 Women Share What Shocked Them That when men have a cold, the world is ending. They can have a stuffy nose and sore throat and I would think they had cancer. One day I will go through the very intense and painful process of childbirth, and then maybe I will understand how a man feels when they're sick for a day.
Edit: I get it. All of you guys are superman and never complain about being sick unless you're super, dying sick.

mandi318 , cottonbro studio Report

Final score:
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Deborah Harris2
Deborah Harris2
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My Ex husband said that women are built for pain and if someone can bleed like a sacrificial goat for 5 days solid once a month and still live then let him die with his man flu in peace :D

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#15

If all of your socks are the same color and the same style, you don't have to mate them. You can just stick them in a drawer and pull out two random socks without even looking at what you're grabbing.

anon Report

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Llewella
Llewella
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This made my life sooooo much easier, living with 3 men that have the same size shoes. We now have a big basket full of identical socks!

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#16

“What Is The Most Surprising Thing You Learned When You Started Living With A Man?”: 30 Women Share What Shocked Them That when taking a dump their penis can accidentally touch the rim of the toilet bowl.

I had lived with a couple other dudes before my husband and never knew this was an issue. Then we bought a house and both of the toilets needed to be replaced. He spent a stupid amount of money at Home Depot on these toilets with elongated bowls and I was perplexed and irritated...until he explained why.

Metalmorphosis , Pixabay Report

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Zedrapazia
Zedrapazia
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Must be a big-dicked one, never happened to my guy

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#17

“What Is The Most Surprising Thing You Learned When You Started Living With A Man?”: 30 Women Share What Shocked Them My wife learned that I cannot poop and hold a conversation at the same time. If I'm on the porcelain throne, then I demand solitude. I will not answer inanities like whether my blue shirt needs a wash or the kitchen is on fire.

a_rainbow_serpent , Vie Studio Report

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Jason
Jason
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I was like this before kids. Now I dream of pooping in piece.

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#18

“What Is The Most Surprising Thing You Learned When You Started Living With A Man?”: 30 Women Share What Shocked Them Something I've noticed since moving in with my SO is how much I enjoy having someone to help me out with stuff.

I've always had kind of bad roommates who tend to not do their fair share of the work (to be fair, I'm a neat freak, so my standards are definitely set higher than the average person's). My SO, though, is always willing to help me out with anything I ask.

I also love having a perpetually available adventure buddy. Even if I just want to go to the grocery store, he's always willing to come with me.

mirarom , Ketut Subiyanto Report

Final score:
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Blackheart
Blackheart
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My hubby is my best friend. It's nice when things work that way.

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#19

Men are always hungry. They can check the fridge many times during evening to check if there is something tasty and ready to be grabbed. Also, if recipe says that it serves 4, it actually means that it serves 4 women or 1 man.

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michael piscopo
michael piscopo
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That's true about the portions: I do the shopping - when it says serves 4 I halve it (uh-oh, better get two) and family size if it's lasagna....

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#20

“What Is The Most Surprising Thing You Learned When You Started Living With A Man?”: 30 Women Share What Shocked Them I can roll over, wake my boyfriend out of a deep sleep, wiggles my eyebrows and say " you horny?" We do the sexy times, He is happy, I am happy, he goes back to sleep, I take shower and do whatever.

Edit: we actually talked about it. I got horny one night and didnt wanna wake him up so I just ignored it and went back to sleep. Told him about it the next morning and he said I should have woke him up, he is always ready. Every time I have done this he has never said no. As we are still youngish, both of us around 30ish, I guess as we get older it'll start to diminish.

Edit again: clarified some things. He is the type that usually can fall back to sleep, he really doesn't mind. I wouldn't blue ball him.
Also this is my highest comment.

GodEaterSha , cottonbro studio Report

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VonBlade
VonBlade
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I see the queue of jealous men has formed an orderly line :)

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#21

How fun it would be to be able to make spontaneous plans.

How wonderful to have someone to snuggle with before you fall asleep.

How much more intimate it is to share the details of your day in person than over text.

How hard it would be when he moved out.

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#22

My SO and I both have full time jobs. I often work 12:00-22:00 but he works morning to early afternoon. Often when I get home from work I've got the most amazing dinner and a hot bath waiting for me. When we get random days off together we go mountain biking, or swimming, or stargazing. It's so comforting having someone like that there for you. We've been together for three years now :)

iislivingthelife Report

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michael piscopo
michael piscopo
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That changes over time. After half a century, sharing some of your insulin supply is romantic....

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#23

“What Is The Most Surprising Thing You Learned When You Started Living With A Man?”: 30 Women Share What Shocked Them He wanted to get one of those little rugs that go around the toilet so he could "miss". Evidently he believed those rugs exist to be peed on.

-purple-is-a-fruit- , Jadon Barnes Report

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#24

“What Is The Most Surprising Thing You Learned When You Started Living With A Man?”: 30 Women Share What Shocked Them Socks, everywhere socks.

heleneotroy , Susanne Jutzeler, suju-foto Report

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#25

“What Is The Most Surprising Thing You Learned When You Started Living With A Man?”: 30 Women Share What Shocked Them Shaving is a sacred ritual. My husband closes the bathroom door, and takes his time shaving, then he comes out flawless.

Brillito , cottonbro studio Report

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Minath
Minath
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I think this is fair enough considering how much damage they could do to their face if they get distracted.

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#26

“What Is The Most Surprising Thing You Learned When You Started Living With A Man?”: 30 Women Share What Shocked Them My husband will turn on the bedroom a/c to its highest setting and then pile three heavy blankets on top of himself. Then complain that it's too hot. Every. Single. Summer. Night.

PaleoGirl94 , Pixabay Report

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HelluvaHedgehogAlien
HelluvaHedgehogAlien
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Aha is your husband one of our hedgehog alien troop in disguise? We all have that trait. Hedgehogs love to snuggle in big heavy blankets.

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#27

“What Is The Most Surprising Thing You Learned When You Started Living With A Man?”: 30 Women Share What Shocked Them They gossip just as much as women do.

MyBobaFetish , Armin Rimoldi Report

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#28

Am male, what my wife said most surprised her/baffles her is my bladder. When I go to bed, if I need to pee, I will. If I don't, I won't. And then I'll sleep the night with nary a stir. And might not pee for a few hours after I get up.

On the flip side, she pees as part of her going to bed routine, otherwise she'll have to get up in the middle of the night to pee. She doesn't understand how I can go 12+ hours without peeing.

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#29

“What Is The Most Surprising Thing You Learned When You Started Living With A Man?”: 30 Women Share What Shocked Them My girlfriend made me realize how much I play with my balls during the day.

LSDeater , Wallace Chuck Report

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#30

So much nakedness.

Vinnara Report

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Jaaawn
Jaaawn
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yes! My partner and I just wear underwear at home!

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