If she comes on the first date, she's practically telling you you'll effectively be dating both of them. She'll be at least as controlling as some of the worst MIL stories we read on BP. Run. Fast.

She's a little bit of an a*****e for leaving after 20 minutes. She should have left after 2 or 3 minutes, max.

To be honest, if a guy my age brought his mother on a first date, she'd be about 90 years old and would probably fall asleep after her rheumatism meds kicked in. So, no problem. In OP's case though, that was a big red flag for a mama's boy.

I almost, kind of, sort of feel sorry for him in a way. It's painfully obvious the boy's not firing on all cylinders and I dread to imagine what's gone on in the mother-son relationship in the previous 24 years for things to reach this point.. whatever's lead to this happening it's a safe bet he's not living his life the same way you, I, or the rest of us do. That said, the woman did exactly the right thing, she deserves a commendation for being so kind, considerate and tolerant. If that's how the first date is, imagine what it would be like when the mum/son (whichever one of them is running the show) gets more comfortable with it, gets their feet under the table? Having more than two people in the bedroom can be great, but not when it's the mother sat there like "oh don't mind me, carry on like I'm not here!" - or giving instructions🤢😱

Cut and run, yes! But since this was going nowhere, my curiosity would win and I'd have to ask them both how they thought this was in ANY way acceptable.... Instead, OP is left with a lot of questions. Like, so many questions! The only almost okay reason is cultural. What country/society /historical period would this be okay in?

Chaperone for a female who sits at a different table is understandable. Mother of a 25 year old male is not.

That's just unhinged! Would never dream of shoe-horning myself in on my kid's dates.

She dodged a bullet. This screams, The guy is married to his mother, you'll never be more than the mistress/bang nanny.

Rolling up to a first date with your mom in tow? Now that's a plot twist worthy of a rom-com! This has got to be one of the most unforgettable (and awkward) dating stories out there. Props for the bravery, but maybe leave the family introductions for date two!

NTA… maybe if he informed you before hand, u would have took ur mom also for him to understand how it would feel. He was definitely a dumb a*s. I would not even talk to him again

If something weird like this happens take the opportunity to have some fun and get weirder than them. Like, start obnoxiously flirting with the mom and asking her naughty questions like what sort of kink she is into.

I'm more surprised with the poll that so few people are willing to express their discomfort.

This is a guy who would invite mom to their honeymoon. And mom would make reservarions for a romantic dinner... for two. Guess which two are going to dinner.

Lol my girl boner just shrivelled and died forever, so thanks for that.

Run!!!

Sounds like you were being interviewed to be a wife.

Dodged a bullet there! "Momma's boys" make the WORST partners.

You were in the wrong by not being honest with what exactly was inappropriate about the dudes mom showing up. Letting them know why this was not ok should have been the first thing out of your mouth. As for the your roommate... this person is an idiot and has poor judgement. I would do the opposite of what your roommate says.

This woman probably has the wedding planned and is moving in!

What on Earth? Has he never been on a date before? Does he know anybody who's been on a date & can tell him how many people there are supposed to be? Has he never read a book, seen a television program or watched a movie in which somebody went on a date but he didn't notice nobody's mom was with them? Not surprised you wondered if you were being pranked. Good for your roommate supporting you but your co-worker saying maybe his mom was "nervous for him"? Well, mom can stay home be nervous there. At some point a mommy bird will push the baby bird from the nest, or baby might leave on his own - but he needs to get out of it & become a big, grown-up bird. You mentioned you would clue him in next time you talked, which somebody certainly needs to do, but why are you considering continuing to communicate with him after telling him, as you left dinner, that it wasn't going to work out? If you do, as naive, or whatever, he is, he's going to misinterpret what you said at the table - think you meant something like you didn't like your dinner - & presume you're now dating. (Unless mommy bird told him you just weren't right for him.) You instantly saw the situation was bizarre & escaped it - don't go back for more.

That's a lot. She's way nicer than I am. First words outta my mouth would have been, are you flucking kidding me??? What a waste of makeup going on an interview to be a side chick to his mommy dearest

I can see three potentials here, 1.she's a helicopter mum, 2. It was a test to see if you could handle it maturely, 3. He realised 5mins in he didn't want to carry on and she was the get out of jail card. Maybe message him and explain you're sorry for fleeing but it was very uncomfortable for a first date. His response will tell you everything you need to know.

You have to wonder if they knew this was not really acceptable because they didn't mention ahead of time that Mom would be there. Then they didn't have her come out to the table until after introductions. Sounds a bit manipulative. I don't understand why they thought they could get past the first date and on to a second though. They must be looking for someone so submissive that she'll go along with anything.

If I would try that, my Mum wouldn't come, because she'd find it creepy. If I were greeted by Parents on a 1st date, I'd leave too. I don't wanna know them yet ... the saying goes "Watch your MIL carefully, that's who you'll have in the house 30 years later.", not "Watch your date's Ma carefully, ... " - way too early, way too creepy, and ... I'd be understanding if he made her leave or something, because you can't know if people have overbearing parents, but as he seemed to not even find it strange, ... well ... let him succeed with that approach, but it doesn't need to be you. Or he doesn't succeed with the means chosen, whatever, ...

I'm getting the impression he's possibly ASD and it was the mother not the guy the woman was in contact with prior to the date and that's why he seemed "like a solid guy" when in real life he's quiet and not not involved in the date.

Someone needs to cut the cord mommy is clutching so hard. But, said someone, might need help to cut it.

AITA for blocking Bored Panda on my Google news feed?