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Let’s be honest, we’ve probably all been in a situation where we made an innocent joke that landed us in hot water. You know, you try to make a harmless joke, and bam— it snowballs into something way bigger, and suddenly, you’re the villain.
That’s what happened when today’s Original Poster (OP) made a joke to a kid about bologna and hot dogs technically being the same. What started as a good time at a birthday party ended with an unhappy text from a friend and waves of guilt. So, was the OP truly at fault for passing a joke… or is the situation just overcooked?
More info: Reddit
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You never know when a seemingly harmless off-hand comment can completely change everything for someone – or even an entire family
Image credits: Askar Abayev / Pexels (not the actual photo)
The poster of the story attended a mutual friend’s kid’s birthday party and helped with grilling on the BBQ, handing out burgers and hot dogs
Image credits: jbm91
Image credits: Luis Quintero / Pexels (not the actual photo)
A kid at the party approached the author and asked if there was bologna, to which they responded that there wasn’t, but hot dogs were available, which were basically the same thing
Image credits: jbm91
Image credits: cottonbro studio / Pexels (not the actual photo)
Two hours later, the poster of the story received a text from the kid’s father, who was furious because his son is a very picky eater, and bologna was the one food his son preferred to eat
Image credits: jbm91
The hosts reached out in assurance that the dad had blown things out of proportion, but the poster of the story still feels guilty for making the joke in the first place
The day was supposed to be about kids and some casual grilling, as the OP helped out at a mutual friend’s birthday party. Since it was a child’s birthday party, the classics were available: BBQ, hot dogs, and hamburgers. It’s easy to imagine the OP happily grilling away, handing out food to adults and kids alike, when one child approached and asked a very specific question: was there any bologna?
The OP mentioned that there were only hamburgers and hot dogs, but joked that hot dogs and bologna are basically the same thing, just in a different form. No harm done, right? Wrong—but it didn’t seem like it because the child passed on both the hot dogs and the burgers, grabbed a bag of chips instead, and went back to playing with the other kids. The OP must have thought that was the end of it—until two hours later.
The OP’s phone buzzed with a message from the kid’s dad, and he was livid. He sent a long text going on about how his son was an extremely picky eater, and how the OP’s joke had “ruined” the only food he could trust his son to eat. The only food was bologna because now he thought hot dogs and bologna were basically the same thing.
Knowing how tough it can be to get picky kids to eat anything at all, the OP felt guilty because they didn’t realize that a light-hearted remark could turn into something more serious. To make matters slightly more confusing, the party hosts reached out to check if the dad had contacted the OP.
However, they assured the OP that they had done nothing wrong, saying that if the kid’s eating habits were as sensitive as that, then maybe the father should have mentioned it beforehand.
Image credits: Mike Mozart / Flickr (not the actual photo)
According to the Child Mind Institute, children often develop strong food preferences which lead to a limited diet of “safe” foods. The OP didn’t know the kid was so picky, and there was no indication at the party that a comment on the resemblance between bologna and hot dogs could backfire. But, for parents of picky eaters, a single off-hand remark like that can sometimes feel like it could jeopardize their child’s food routine.
Very Well Family reports that picky eating can be very stressful for parents. It goes further to state that picky eating may just be for a season, however, it could also be an indication of a more serious problem, as studies have shown that even moderate instances of “selective eating” are linked to symptoms of anxiety and depression, even in young children.
This ties in with research carried out by Harvard Health Publishing, which states that parents play a role in picky eating behaviors, too.
The researchers discovered that when parents were overly rigid about what their child could or couldn’t eat, the child was more likely to develop picky eating behaviors. Overall, it concludes that when attending social events, parents should make a habit of informing hosts or food servers about their child’s specific food aversions.
The OP turned to netizens to see if they were in the wrong, and as usual, the internet delivered. Many agreed that the dad should have mentioned it beforehand since there was no way the OP could have known.
One of the commenters agreed that there was no way the OP could have known, adding that “the child asked a question, and you answered normally.”
While it’s clear that kids can struggle with certain foods for all kinds of reasons, does that really mean OP should take any of the blame? Have you ever been in a similar situation? What do you think about this situation in particular?
Netizens rallied around the poster of the story, affirming that bologna is indeed a giant hot dog and that the OP is not a mind reader, therefore, they did nothing wrong
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What do you think ?
Tabitha 1 month ago (edited)
Who TF EVER serves bologna at a BBQ, ffs? How entitled to expect everyone else to just somehow “know” he has an issue eating nothing but bologna? It was the parents’ responsibility to inform the hosts and other parents, not the host’s and other parents’ responsibility to read the kid’s and their parents’ minds! Use your voices, ffs, and TELL people ahead of time!
Ash 1 month ago
I didn't get the impression that the other dad was mad that there wasn't bologna at the party. I got the impression he was mad because the hot dog comment made his son not want to even eat bologna anymore once he got home.
Load More Replies...
Libstak 1 month ago (edited)
The kid was always going find this out at some point unless dad intended to keep him locked in a cave somewhere. It's stupid to expect someone who has no idea a random kid has an eating disorder that those around him have no idea even exists to be careful about equating Bologna to hotdog meat. In what universe would any adult blame*waves vaguely at the world at large* for something so out there?
V 1 month ago
As someone with a child with food allergies and aversions NTA. You didn't know, and the fact that you feel bad shows that if you knew you would have dealt with the situation differently. If you knew the kid had food aversions and still tried to get them to eat an unsafe good then it would be different.
Tabitha 1 month ago (edited)
Who TF EVER serves bologna at a BBQ, ffs? How entitled to expect everyone else to just somehow “know” he has an issue eating nothing but bologna? It was the parents’ responsibility to inform the hosts and other parents, not the host’s and other parents’ responsibility to read the kid’s and their parents’ minds! Use your voices, ffs, and TELL people ahead of time!
Ash 1 month ago
I didn't get the impression that the other dad was mad that there wasn't bologna at the party. I got the impression he was mad because the hot dog comment made his son not want to even eat bologna anymore once he got home.
Load More Replies... Libstak 1 month ago (edited)
The kid was always going find this out at some point unless dad intended to keep him locked in a cave somewhere. It's stupid to expect someone who has no idea a random kid has an eating disorder that those around him have no idea even exists to be careful about equating Bologna to hotdog meat. In what universe would any adult blame*waves vaguely at the world at large* for something so out there?
V 1 month ago
As someone with a child with food allergies and aversions NTA. You didn't know, and the fact that you feel bad shows that if you knew you would have dealt with the situation differently. If you knew the kid had food aversions and still tried to get them to eat an unsafe good then it would be different.
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