Somewhere in the world (let’s be honest — usually Florida) hilariously bizarre things happen every day. So when some people say that the news is boring, we bet they probably never stumbled upon ridiculous, weird, and straight-up stupid stories that made it both to TV and print.
Thanks to the "Internet’s Craziest Headlines" Twitter account, these people might be proved wrong. From "China may be using sea to hide its submarines" to "Large cat spotted" to "Man sold TV to buy remote", the creators of this account bring the most bizarre collection of titles and captions for you to enjoy.
So get ready to witness a whole new level of absurdity because Bored Panda has selected some of the best posts this account had to offer. Continue scrolling and upvote the ones that made you scratch your head the most! After you’re done with this post, you can find some more headline goodness right here and here.
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Some say "You can’t judge a book by its cover", but it seems that plenty of people decide whether an article is worth reading or a news segment worth watching just by their titles. According to Brian Clark, the founder of Copyblogger, 8 out of 10 people will read the headline, but only 2 out of 10 will read the rest.
After all, getting your title clicked on is hard work. It has to be specific, rewarding, and intriguing all at the same time. Plus, it has to be useful if your goal is to reach more people. The headline is the first (and sometimes the only!) impression you make on a potential reader.
"Writing a great headline doesn’t guarantee the success of your writing. The benefit conveyed in the headline still needs to be properly satisfied in the body," Clark wrote. "But great body content with a bad or even marginal headline is doomed to go largely unread."
Genital mutilation as an adequate response to cheating? Are you guys serious???
Welcome to BP, where the double standard is harshly enforced.
Load More Replies...So what I take from the comments is: If my GF or wife cheats on me it's OK to beat her into the hospital with life long injuries if she cheats. Or is that different because she's a woman? (Cheering for massive violence that isn't necessary is never a good thing)
It’s not right to laugh at this, but I think women do find this funny in a way that may satisfy their want or need for revenge since justice for assault on women by men has been so slow-coming. Women grow up learning of and facing rape, gang rape, molestations, domestic violence, murder and other forms of violence so much more commonly done to women and girls. We learn how the perpetrators constantly escape justice and are sometimes even idolized (Trump, Dr. Dre, Don McLean, Bill Cosby, Bill Clinton, etc.). We grow up w jokes about beating women (what do you call a woman w two black eyes) and are taught how to use our car keys as a weapon. So, yeah - we might get a little laugh, a slight feeling of satisfaction, when a headline about a woman bursting open a man’s testicles comes up.
Load More Replies...In? How? Did he willingly put it there, or do I misunderstand the preposition?
Hey honey you know what would be really kinky. Placing your testicles in this open book. Husband this better not be like that time you had me put my wiener In the cigarette lighter.
Load More Replies...I'm confused did he willingly just sit there as she came towards him with said photo album?
This is psychopathic behavior. As horrible cheating is, it's no excuse to assault a person..
She did take her man, as it seems (although I guess she can have him now?)
Load More Replies...Anybody condoning this is a suck fck and a hypocrite. If a guy were to mutilate his wife's vagina for the same thing, people would be fn mortified and calling him a disgusting, hateful animal and demonizing him and calling for him to rot in fn prison. So FCK all of you hateful, shallow, totally hypocritical pieces of sh*t.
Damn , I want to laugh at that smile ... until I consider the actual horror she committed and how bloody and awful it must've been . That smile isn't so funny anymore
Yeah, that’s a fake headline that has nothing to do with that mugshot 😂
Look, I get that he cheated, but... he's mutilated, probably for life. Nobody would be ok with this brutality if the genders were reversed.
Google female genital mutilation. It’s because men a) don’t know clitoral anatomy b) preemptively cut off a woman’s clit because they assume she will cheat.
Load More Replies...How dis she get him to sit still long enough? Every cheated on wife wants to know!
I want to know how? Was he asleep? Drunk? And how heavy was this photo album?
You're told not to smile in your mug shot, but this woman's exuberance could not be contained.
Such a smile you know he only thought with his penis. How was she supposed to know the book was heavy enough burst open his s*****m.
That satisfied grin says it all. Smash some unfaithful nuts and suddenly the world is all unicorns and rainbows again.
I want to know the mechanics of this. I am trying to picture it, but I am failing.
Burst!!! Very graphic title. I’m very visual. I wish you could’ve been inside my brain when I read that.
UGGH that the thought of that happening to me made me feel very uncomfortable
So mutilation is an okay reaction to being cheated on?
Load More Replies...Remind me to bread my girl friends pubic bone if she cheats on me, and see how many people back me up
Load More Replies...This is probably the happiest criminal in the world. Not one ounce of a crap given.
Some whore on here said before that men don't have to worry about stuff like this. That misandry doesn't affect men. I think they said that because if a man crushed a woman's tits for cheating it would be wrong. But this is somehow acceptable?
You don't need to worry - you have to date someone before you can be unfaithful to them.
Load More Replies...hahahaha that smile though... you go girl. good for you. Also either your ex has tiny testicles or that was a gigantic book, either way, not mad at you.
so you think damaging a relationship warrants agonizing physical mutilation that leaves him unable to have children? what if the roles were reversed? would you still be laughing if a man ripped out his girlfriend's ovaries because she cheated? you're sick.
Load More Replies...Lina Survila, the editor in chief of Abstract Stylist online magazine, has years of experience working in the press. She told Bored Panda in a previous interview that "editors are often pressured to bring better results with each article, so headline wars have become the real deal today."
She argued that there's a fine line between an informative headline and a fake one. “First, we all need to know that headlines play a big role in Google's ranking magic. Every editor has a wish for their article to reach the top position, meaning more clicks if a user is often searching for it," Lina explained.
"So because an editor wants to reach more people, they end up using trendy keywords which result in misleading headlines," Lina said and added that it happens more often than you’d think.
The founder of Abstract Stylist also mentioned that "clickbait headlines often mislead people, and those who do not bother to open the article might mislead other people too by spreading the wrong message. For example, recently, I read that K. Reaves is married to Winona Ryder, well, it was stated in the headline, and actually, they were married in the movie."
However, it turns out that readers also contribute to spreading misleading information — some people share links on their social media feeds without ever reading what’s inside. In 2016, satirical news site The Science Post published an article with a troubling headline: "Study: 70% of Facebook users only read the headline of science stories before commenting". However, the body of the article contained nothing more than "lorem ipsum” placeholder text. But nearly 46K people shared the post.
According to a study by computer scientists at Columbia University and the French National Institute, 59 percent of links shared on social media have never actually been opened and read.
"People are more willing to share an article than read it," study co-author Arnaud Legout said. "This is typical of modern information consumption. People form an opinion based on a summary, or a summary of summaries, without making the effort to go deeper," he said.
This is why I like to remind people that there's a sliding scale between "People who just think that anthropomorphic animals are neat/easy to draw" and THIS in the Furry Fandom. They're not all weirdos, I swear.
Anyone else find it boring that like half of these are fake? I'd have thought there is enough crazy headlines out there to not having to include fake ones.
I mean... Just call it "Funny Fake Headlines." Seriously. Bored Panda thinks we're all idiots.
BP articles like this would be a lot better if you weeded out the ones that were actually satire
What I understand from this post : Florida is one heck of a crazy place
The real lesson here: Florida has public record laws that make it easier to write articles like this about the dumb things they do.
Load More Replies...As a Floridian I love reading these Florida Man posts because they are hilarious
This whole thing reminds me of a channel called Gray still plays!! Haha!
They're not crazy headlines if they're made up! Please don't put fake headlines to fake stories in posts like this.
I remember seeing a few of these such as the one about Michigan schools and kitty litter fir furries.
Well, my ex is from Florida, guess that explains a few things. I seem to have dodged a bullet
Just Google Florida Man and follow with your birth month and day... It never disappoints
I enjoy a "Florida Man" joke as much as the next person, but it should always be noted that the REASON Florida has so many crazy headlines is at least partially because of public record laws in Florida. https://www.cnn.com/2019/03/22/us/florida-man-google-challenge-trnd/index.html
Let's keep in mind that part of the reason we see so many "Florida Man" headlines that it's become a meme is that the media has more access to police records due to freedom of information laws in Florida. People from other states do crazy stuff as well, we just don't hear about it as much.
Anyone else find it boring that like half of these are fake? I'd have thought there is enough crazy headlines out there to not having to include fake ones.
I mean... Just call it "Funny Fake Headlines." Seriously. Bored Panda thinks we're all idiots.
BP articles like this would be a lot better if you weeded out the ones that were actually satire
What I understand from this post : Florida is one heck of a crazy place
The real lesson here: Florida has public record laws that make it easier to write articles like this about the dumb things they do.
Load More Replies...As a Floridian I love reading these Florida Man posts because they are hilarious
This whole thing reminds me of a channel called Gray still plays!! Haha!
They're not crazy headlines if they're made up! Please don't put fake headlines to fake stories in posts like this.
I remember seeing a few of these such as the one about Michigan schools and kitty litter fir furries.
Well, my ex is from Florida, guess that explains a few things. I seem to have dodged a bullet
Just Google Florida Man and follow with your birth month and day... It never disappoints
I enjoy a "Florida Man" joke as much as the next person, but it should always be noted that the REASON Florida has so many crazy headlines is at least partially because of public record laws in Florida. https://www.cnn.com/2019/03/22/us/florida-man-google-challenge-trnd/index.html
Let's keep in mind that part of the reason we see so many "Florida Man" headlines that it's become a meme is that the media has more access to police records due to freedom of information laws in Florida. People from other states do crazy stuff as well, we just don't hear about it as much.