Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday, dear pandas! Happy birthday to you!

No matter how old you are, you deserve to celebrate your birthday and feel loved on your special day. And while this can become more difficult when you’re a parent with a chaotic schedule, it shouldn’t be impossible.

One mother recently reached out to Reddit for advice after her husband ruined her birthday for the second year in a row. Below, you’ll find all of the details, as well as some of the replies concerned readers shared. 

Everyone deserves to celebrate their birthday, regardless of how old they are

Image credits: LightFieldStudios / envato (not the actual photo)

But when this woman’s husband ruined her special day two years in a row, she decided that she was finished with their marriage

Image credits: Polina Zimmerman / pexels (not the actual photo)

Image source: EducatorGrouchy4625

About half of Americans celebrate their birthdays by spending time with their families

Image credits: lil artsy / pexels (not the actual photo)

I am a huge lover of birthdays. I’m partial to mine, of course, but even when my loved ones are celebrating, I try to make sure that they have the most special day possible. Aging is a gift, and it deserves to be celebrated. And especially when you’re a busy mom of four children, you deserve at least one day out of the year when you get to relax, unwind and enjoy some me-time.

Birthdays often take on a new meaning when you have children, as making your little ones feel special is extremely important when their birthdays arrive. But that doesn’t mean that Mom and Dad’s big days should be overlooked. In fact, you should never stop celebrating your birthday if you don’t want to! 

According to YouGov, nearly half of adults in the United States feel neutral about their birthdays, and only 43% say that they like it or love it. Less than half report feeling happy on their birthdays, and less than a quarter say that they get excited about their birthday. 

And when it comes to how Americans choose to celebrate, 54% say that they usually “thank God for being alive.” Half will also spend time with family, and 41% of Americans will open presents or cards on their birthday. 40% will enjoy a special meal to celebrate getting a year older, and 38% will reflect on their life. Surprisingly, only 37% say that they’ll eat cake, but maybe the majority prefer to have pie or ice cream instead.

Even busy moms should have the opportunity to celebrate their birthdays

Image credits: Keira Burton / pexels (not the actual photo)

Doing something special for your birthday when you’re a busy mom might be a bit more complicated than it would have been before you had kids, but it’s definitely still worth doing. The Mama Manual recommends planning a series of smaller celebrations, such as having a nice date night out with your partner or treating yourself to take-out one evening while your spouse cooks for the kids. You might not be able to dedicate an entire day to celebrating, but you may be able to squeeze in tiny celebrations all week.

Another option is meeting up with a friend for lunch to catch up and enjoy a meal without any interruptions from kiddos. Or, perhaps you’d like to have a “me” day. If your partner can watch the kids all day, you can take some time to get your nails done, go to your favorite coffee shop, do a bit of shopping or relax in the park with a book without worrying about needing to be anywhere else.

And if you’d like to stay home for your birthday celebration, the Mama Manual recommends hosting a virtual party with your friends across the city or country or having a fancy dinner with your spouse at home. If they prepare a nice meal, light some candles and get a nice bottle of wine, you can get all dressed up for the evening without having to leave your house or hire a babysitter. 

Making your partner feel loved and appreciated is key to having a healthy relationship

Image credits: Hannah Stevens / pexels (not the actual photo)

Now, if you want to celebrate your birthday as a busy parent, but your spouse won’t put any effort into making your day special, that’s a problem. If you truly love someone, you will want them to feel cared for all the time, but especially on their birthday. According to HuffPost, appreciation is key to a healthy relationship because humans crave positive attention.

If we don’t feel appreciated by the people around us, we might start to feel insecure in our relationships or worry that we’ve done something wrong. We might even withdraw from friendships or romantic relationships if we start to believe that there’s no reason to put in effort if the other person won’t. 

But there are two important aspects of appreciation: time and focus, HuffPost notes. It’s not enough to simply be around your partner or to focus on them for a few minutes. It takes time and effort to ensure they feel understood, and a lack of appreciation can’t simply be fixed by buying a bouquet of flowers once a year. 

It’s heartbreaking that this mother had two terrible birthdays back to back, but hopefully next year she’ll be surrounded by loved ones who make up for the disappointing birthdays of years past. We would love to hear your thoughts on this situation in the comments below, pandas. Then, if you’re interested in checking out another Bored Panda piece discussing birthday drama, look no further than right here!

Readers called out the husband for his immature behavior and encouraged the mother to end her marriage

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