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Woman Wants To Get Half Of Ex-Husband’s Inheritance For Kids, Gets A Reality Check From New Wife
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Woman Wants To Get Half Of Ex-Husband’s Inheritance For Kids, Gets A Reality Check From New Wife

Interview With Expert Woman Wants To Get Half Of Ex-Husband’s Inheritance For Kids, Gets A Reality Check From New WifeWoman Gets Inheritance From Husband, Is Confused When His Ex Starts Asking For Her Kids’ PartWidow Stands Firm Against Ex-Wife’s Demands For Husband’s InheritanceWidow Inherits Everything Late Husband Owned, Ex-Wife Expects Her Kids To Get Half Of ItWidow Stands Firm Against Ex-Wife’s Demands For Husband’s Inheritance, Family Drama UnfoldsWoman Planned To Keep Late Husband’s Inheritance For Herself, His Ex Asks For Her Kids’ PartWidow Asks If She’s Wrong For Refusing To Give Stepkids A Share Of Husband’s InheritanceEx-Wife Demands New Wife Give Her Kids Half The Inheritance After Husband Passes AwayWoman Refuses To Share Husband's Inheritance After “Nightmare” Ex-Wife Demands Half Of EverythingMoney Drama Ensues After Husband Passes Away And Wife Gets Harassed By Ex-Wife Over Inheritance
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Many people think of writing up a will when it’s too late. One will and estate planning survey revealed that only 32% of Americans have a will in place in case something happens. Experts often urge people to get it sorted early, but even if the majority of Americans agree it’s important, they still don’t have a will.

If this husband had it, his current and ex-wife would have avoided a lot of drama. The ex-wife demanded the widow share the deceased husband’s estate with the children from his first marriage. But the woman didn’t feel that was fair, so she decided to ask the Internet’s opinion: should she give something to his other two children?

We reached out to Wealth Consultant Catherine Valega, CFP, and she kindly agreed to comment on the situation. She told Bored Panda more about why estate planning is so important and what financial tools people with children from previous marriages should use. Read her expert insights below!

This woman faced a dilemma about her deceased husband’s estate: to share it with her stepkids or not

Image credits: Dimaberlin / Envato (not the actual photo)

So, she decided to consult with the Internet and asked netizens for some advice

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Image credits: Pressmaster / Envato (not the actual photo)

Image credits: lifefail4

People should start thinking about estate planning even if they’re young

A partner passing away is a major life adjustment. According to the Pew Research Center, 55% of breadwinners today in the U.S. are still men. So, if a tragedy happens and the husband passes away, the wife has to fend for herself financially.

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The author of this story doesn’t specify whether the husband did any estate planning. She does, however, mention that he had life insurance through his workplace, but, apparently, it “barely covered the funeral.”

Certified Financial Planner Catherine Valega tells Bored Panda that estate planning is something people of all ages need to think about. “Way too many people avoid this,” she says. Valega points out that people can do this even with “easy online attorney-ish softwares” if they lack the funds for a lawyer. Still, she admits that paying an attorney would always be preferable.

“If you’re young and healthy, get a large-term life insurance policy,” Valega recommends. “Review beneficiaries – often,” she adds. “They do change! And if you don’t change [it] when you get remarried, your ex-wife may wind up with everything.”

However, in a particular case like this, according to Valega, it’s best to contact an attorney. Which, it seems, the author has already done. “Legally, I get everything,” she wrote in a comment. So, her dilemma is not a legal one but a moral one.

Estate planning in blended families is complicated and very personal

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Image credits: DC Studio / Freepik (not the actual photo)

The commenters were divided into two camps. Some said the OP is acting incredibly selfish by not considering the children from her husband’s first marriage. Others claimed she owed them nothing; it was the husband’s job to ensure his children from the first marriage get taken care of.

Experts at Ellis Law say that proper estate planning would definitely guarantee the financial safety of the children from a first marriage. In general, these types of situations require very good communication in the blended family, as it is a very sensitive topic.

A partner might take dividing the estate as an insult. In most cases, after all, a spouse inherits their deceased partner’s estate. A decision to divide the estate might, in turn, divide the couple as well.

Still, an individual should let their wishes be known in writing before passing away. “Most people want to provide for their second spouse as well as their children, either by a prior marriage or the current marriage,” Attorney Adair M. Buckner writes. “What you want may not happen, though, unless you have done the right estate planning beforehand.”

No one can really tell the OP what to do in this situation. Hopefully, after reading the input from many netizens, she finds it easier to make a decision.

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Many people told her to consult a lawyer, and others gave her some practical tips

Some sided with the author, saying that it was the husband’s job to include his children in the will

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Others called her selfish for not being more considerate toward her stepchildren

Many shared similar experiences and stories

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Kornelija Viečaitė

Kornelija Viečaitė

Writer, BoredPanda staff

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Hi there, fellow pandas! As a person (over)educated both in social sciences and literature, I'm most interested in how we connect and behave online (and sometimes in real life too.) The human experience is weird, so I try my best to put its peculiarities in writing. As a person who grew up chronically online, I now try to marry two sides of myself: the one who knows too much about MySpace, and the one who can't settle and needs to see every corner of the world.

Read less »
Kornelija Viečaitė

Kornelija Viečaitė

Writer, BoredPanda staff

Hi there, fellow pandas! As a person (over)educated both in social sciences and literature, I'm most interested in how we connect and behave online (and sometimes in real life too.) The human experience is weird, so I try my best to put its peculiarities in writing. As a person who grew up chronically online, I now try to marry two sides of myself: the one who knows too much about MySpace, and the one who can't settle and needs to see every corner of the world.

Mindaugas Balčiauskas

Mindaugas Balčiauskas

Author, BoredPanda staff

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I'm a visual editor at Bored Panda. I kickstart my day with a mug of coffee bigger than my head, ready to tackle Photoshop. I navigate through the digital jungle with finesse, fueled by bamboo breaks and caffeine kicks. When the workday winds down, you might catch me devouring bamboo snacks while binging on the latest TV show, gaming or I could be out in nature, soaking up the tranquility and communing with my inner panda.

Read less »

Mindaugas Balčiauskas

Mindaugas Balčiauskas

Author, BoredPanda staff

I'm a visual editor at Bored Panda. I kickstart my day with a mug of coffee bigger than my head, ready to tackle Photoshop. I navigate through the digital jungle with finesse, fueled by bamboo breaks and caffeine kicks. When the workday winds down, you might catch me devouring bamboo snacks while binging on the latest TV show, gaming or I could be out in nature, soaking up the tranquility and communing with my inner panda.

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Hphizzle
Community Member
2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I think this is a “what type of lawyer should I get?” Not an “AITA?” kind of question. Who-gets-what in this situation is primarily up to the laws of the place op and the kids live. A lot of these things are not up to OP to decide. Get a good estate lawyer and head to probate court. It’s going to be a long road, so be patient. And only keep contact with the ex through the lawyer.

Mike m
Community Member
2 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

She said in a reply she's getting everything. Sounds like it resolved itself. The ex wants the kids, meaning her to get assets that were earned AFTER they broke up. No way.

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Michael MacKinnon
Community Member
2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Lots of anecdotes, lots of guilt-shaming, very little legal expertise there. **What does the law say** in your jurisdiction: that's what people are entitled to, end of story, cut the drama.

Sand Ers
Community Member
2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

OP said quite clearly that her lawyer tells her she inherited 100% of his assets.

Load More Replies...
Nadine Debard
Community Member
2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

In France the kids would inherit part of the house as bare owners or get a small ownership part. That's why we need lawyers and attorneys

Scrappychick
Community Member
2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My mum passed away while living with my step dad in france and the estate was split like this. He ended up letting the properties deteriorate so badly that when he decided to sell them after re marrying (a wealthy woman) they were worth less than have their market value. It is a good system in that the remaining spouse can't be turfed out but there should be a requirement that properties should be maintained. (He contributed exactly 0 to the purchase of the properties and the businesses she set up, she even paid for him to go to university twice for his "career changes", but profited amazingly after her death.

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Hphizzle
Community Member
2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I think this is a “what type of lawyer should I get?” Not an “AITA?” kind of question. Who-gets-what in this situation is primarily up to the laws of the place op and the kids live. A lot of these things are not up to OP to decide. Get a good estate lawyer and head to probate court. It’s going to be a long road, so be patient. And only keep contact with the ex through the lawyer.

Mike m
Community Member
2 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

She said in a reply she's getting everything. Sounds like it resolved itself. The ex wants the kids, meaning her to get assets that were earned AFTER they broke up. No way.

Load More Replies...
Michael MacKinnon
Community Member
2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Lots of anecdotes, lots of guilt-shaming, very little legal expertise there. **What does the law say** in your jurisdiction: that's what people are entitled to, end of story, cut the drama.

Sand Ers
Community Member
2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

OP said quite clearly that her lawyer tells her she inherited 100% of his assets.

Load More Replies...
Nadine Debard
Community Member
2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

In France the kids would inherit part of the house as bare owners or get a small ownership part. That's why we need lawyers and attorneys

Scrappychick
Community Member
2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My mum passed away while living with my step dad in france and the estate was split like this. He ended up letting the properties deteriorate so badly that when he decided to sell them after re marrying (a wealthy woman) they were worth less than have their market value. It is a good system in that the remaining spouse can't be turfed out but there should be a requirement that properties should be maintained. (He contributed exactly 0 to the purchase of the properties and the businesses she set up, she even paid for him to go to university twice for his "career changes", but profited amazingly after her death.

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