Husband Shoots Down Every Single Name Idea From Pregnant Wife, Netizens Say He’s Totally Right
Different families have different approaches to choosing names for children. For example, my dad and mom once had a real long argument about my name, but my wife and I chose names for all three of our offspring quite quickly and easily. However, the role of fathers is sometimes very specific in this process…
An additional confirmation of this fact is today’s story from the user Plum02, who will soon give birth to her first child, and is eager to quickly pick a beautiful name for the daughter. But the woman’s husband, as it turns out, doesn’t share her enthusiasm at all.
More info: Mumsnet
The author of the post is a mom-to-be and she’s so eager to pick a beautiful name for her daughter
Image credits: pixel-shot.com / Freepik (not the actual photo)
However, the woman’s husband has reacted quite strangely, rejecting every given option without giving any of his own
Image credits: Plum02
Image credits: Timur Weber / Pexels (not the actual photo)
The woman finally stopped her search on the name “Ottilie” but the hubby just rolled his eyes after hearing it
Image credits: Plum02
Image credits: Getty Images / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
But the man still was silent about his own preferences, thus driving the wife mad
Image credits: Plum02
The woman took it online to vent about it, and to seek some support and advice from netizens
So, the Original Poster (OP) is pregnant with her first baby, a daughter, and she and her husband, reasonably, have raised the question of the child’s name. However, the main problem with this is that only the wife has been coming up with ideas, and her spouse has limited his participation to rejecting the options. Literally all of them.
Our heroine had never even suspected that the man she lived with had so much hatred for a variety of names. The guy rejected the following names one after another: Margot, Ophelia and Clementine (just ugly and horrible, according to the picky hubs), Octavia (a car’s name), Etta (seems weird) and Penelope (seems old-fashioned).
Finally, after much thought and searching, the expectant mom found the name Ottilie, which seemed unusual to her on the one hand, and quite classic, beautiful and interesting on the other. However, when the woman told her husband that she had a new idea, he just rolled his eyes – before he even heard the name.
After learning the name, the man objected even more, saying that he didn’t want to name his daughter “Otter.” To the wife’s reasonable objections that the girl could have the nickname “Tilly,” he wasn’t happy either. And, what’s most offensive, he again didn’t put forward a single idea of his own, only criticism of literally every option.
So our heroine decided to take it online – maybe netizens, in addition to some support, will advise her something from their own experience. And who knows, someone may even come up with a couple more ideas for a name for the child that both spouses will definitely like?
Image credits: pvproductions / Freepik (not the actual photo)
It must be said that the name Ottilie itself is quite rare nowadays. The name originates from the German male name “Otto”, which in the Old German language meant, in particular, “prosperous” or “wealthy.” However, if you look at the list of famous bearers of this name, you can see that they mostly lived no later than the first half of the last century.
Of modern public figures with this name, we can highlight, for example, the German politician Ottilie Klein and the Polish swimmer Otylia Jędrzejczak. And, yes, the original poster was quite right – the diminutive form of this name does sound like “Tilly.” Although, to be honest, I personally also thought of an otter at first…
However, there are often such people whom I call to myself “the devil’s advocate.” No, I’m not talking about that movie with Keanu Reeves and Al Pacino, but about a real medieval position.
When the College of Cardinals in Rome discussed the candidacies of potential saints, a special official had to give reasons why the candidate should be rejected. And this principle is often, sometimes unconsciously, used by many people in everyday life…
By the way, the opinions of the commenters under the original post were also divided. Someone completely agreed with the author, claiming that she came up with beautiful options, and her husband responded quite unreasonably. “Fair enough if he doesn’t like your suggestions but it’s rude to just go ‘nah’ every time without coming up with any ideas of his own,” one of the responders wrote.
However, some people also think that the couple should make two lists of their favorite names and go that route. “Then you can discuss, names are really personal and we have deep seated reasons for liking/hating them,” another person added.
And someone else simply thinks that they should wait until their daughter is born. “You don’t need to rush,” the commenter supposed. And which point of view do you, our dear readers, agree with more?
People in the comments sided with the mom-to-be, but also suggested the spouses to wait till the baby is born
Poll Question
Thanks! Check out the results:
It occurs to me that this is not going to work. My thought is that he doesn't actually want this child. Not wanting to suggest names for your own child? My wife and I each made lists of names we liked, and then chose names based on what was on both our lists. Okay, he doesn't like her suggestions. What are HIS suggestions? Maybe they can compromise somewhere? No? I don't see a happy future for this couple without some counseling and changes.
I wondered that as well… if he’s freaked out about the pregnancy or just flat out regrets it. And yeah, why doesn’t she ask him for his suggestions?
Load More Replies...I'm wondering why she's even married to him at all, much less having children with him. He sounds negative, pouty, insufferable, and irrational, not to mention testerical. I wonder if this marriage will even last with his attitude.
"testerical"! lmao. I love it. I have to remember that one!
Load More Replies...But what are his suggestions? He seems to know what he doesn't like, does he know what he does like?
When I first saw the headline I thought the wife was suggesting all these Tragedeigh-type names. Most of them at least have a historical precedent and are spelled conventionally. And maybe names like Margot might become fashionable once again thanks to Margot Robbie and Barbie
I don't like all those names, but names like 'Penelope' and 'Margot' are perfectly reasonable classics, not some weird thing she invented on the spot. Fine, he doesn't like them, fair enough - what are his ideas? It's hard to agree on anything if he won't even suggest what he likes.
Ottilie is a popular name in Eastern Europe and it was 83rd most popular girls name in England and Wales in 2022.
Load More Replies...Okay, she likes classical names most of which have been out of use for about 75 years. So they don’t have matching tastes but he needs to offer a suggestion each time he vetoes a name because they are not on the same page here. She likes names popular during the silent film star era, he does not. Fair enough but make some suggestions dude, or you’re ending up with Claudette or Viola next.
OP'S husband is being an àss. Either he comes up with suggestions, or shut the hell up and settle for one of the names on the list. And guys? Some of those names may not be what you or I would choose, but she's getting nothing but grief from the (in)significant other, and at least she's trying. So cut her some slack, okay?
He needs to come up with some ideas or stfu. I would suggest each of them not talking about names for two weeks, then coming back with a written list of names they like and see if there's anything the same or at least similar and go from there, but it sounds like the sperm donor would not want to bother.
As a retired school registrar, please don't give your child a name that they can't find on a souvenir.
Etta James was a great blues/jazz singer. I'd be pleased to carry her name.
Yes! She's a god. I was like whadaya mean it does sound like a real name??? He sounds like an ahole
Load More Replies...I don't like any of those names either, but he can't just turn her ideas down without offering some suggestions of his own. There are also great websites that let you narrow down choices, or suggest names based on a choice. I find the idea weird that men would care more about boys' names and women about girls'. You are both the parents and should care.
I thought they were going to be "tragedeigh" names but actually they're all incredibly posh. Not Tarquin and Jocasta posh but not too far off. Not objectionable but not to everyone's taste
Tell him you are going to namer her Karen, then ask to speak to a manager when he hates it.
Name the kid after some decaeased-but-beloved relative: a grandmother or great aunt or something. The Elizabeths in my family go back generations.
When we found out I was having a girl, I wanted to name he Phoenix. I liked the nickname Nix. My husband hated it, lol. No worries. Margot was actually one of the names on our list, so was Mabel and Madeline. We ended up with Maeve and she is totally 100% a Maeve. Irish attitude and all!
Giving the father a chance to come up with a whole bunch of names and telling what's wrong with them would be the way to go - at least in my mind. Also hearing the reasons Etta and Penelope are not an option
To be fair, those names suck. We just had a baby girl and there's zero chance I would have agreed to any of those names. But yes, he needs to have suggestions of his own and she can see if she likes any of those. We both did lists and then shot down ones we hated or saved likable ones for later, eventually narrowing it down to one favorite name that became our daughter's name.
He needs to produce a list of names he likes with some parameters like nothing in the top 25. Just vetoing what you like isn’t productive. Btw, I like Margot.
I am a teacher and the names that these people give these kids are odd to say the least and are difficult to pronounce. Then I have others that want to be called by their preferred names because they hate the name their parents gave them.
Her husband has a trust issue. Look at the challenge from his perspective. Choosing the right name feels like a big responsibility to him. What if his child is bullied in the future because of the given name? He already feels guilty. Make a personal list of favorite names and let him choose from it. He will never be able to choose from the large universe of possible names.
I hate ultimatums, but this might be a case where it is needed. Basically tell him that he ahs a week to come up with a list of 10 names (maybe 20) or you will be naming your child.
No idea why he hasn't any ideas to suggest, but I agree with him about her list. This from someone who named a child "Rainbow", over 40 years later she still speaks to me.
I suspect the husband is just fed up with OP going on about it and the quickest way to shut the conversation down is just to dismiss the names.
Actually, the quickest way to shut the conversation down is to fully participate in it, come up with a name that they both agree on, and then let it go until the child is born. No more irritating discussions then.
Load More Replies...Only because you're North American and pronounce Ts as Ds. The rest of the world pronounces it the correct way.
Load More Replies...God , shes bad at this. Talk about hideous names. Why don't you just buy a baby name book and go through it with your hubby one evening?
Kind of hard to do if he refuses to make any suggestions...
Load More Replies...Those aren't names I would choose, but I think the point is that the husband should be helping choose a name.
Load More Replies...It occurs to me that this is not going to work. My thought is that he doesn't actually want this child. Not wanting to suggest names for your own child? My wife and I each made lists of names we liked, and then chose names based on what was on both our lists. Okay, he doesn't like her suggestions. What are HIS suggestions? Maybe they can compromise somewhere? No? I don't see a happy future for this couple without some counseling and changes.
I wondered that as well… if he’s freaked out about the pregnancy or just flat out regrets it. And yeah, why doesn’t she ask him for his suggestions?
Load More Replies...I'm wondering why she's even married to him at all, much less having children with him. He sounds negative, pouty, insufferable, and irrational, not to mention testerical. I wonder if this marriage will even last with his attitude.
"testerical"! lmao. I love it. I have to remember that one!
Load More Replies...But what are his suggestions? He seems to know what he doesn't like, does he know what he does like?
When I first saw the headline I thought the wife was suggesting all these Tragedeigh-type names. Most of them at least have a historical precedent and are spelled conventionally. And maybe names like Margot might become fashionable once again thanks to Margot Robbie and Barbie
I don't like all those names, but names like 'Penelope' and 'Margot' are perfectly reasonable classics, not some weird thing she invented on the spot. Fine, he doesn't like them, fair enough - what are his ideas? It's hard to agree on anything if he won't even suggest what he likes.
Ottilie is a popular name in Eastern Europe and it was 83rd most popular girls name in England and Wales in 2022.
Load More Replies...Okay, she likes classical names most of which have been out of use for about 75 years. So they don’t have matching tastes but he needs to offer a suggestion each time he vetoes a name because they are not on the same page here. She likes names popular during the silent film star era, he does not. Fair enough but make some suggestions dude, or you’re ending up with Claudette or Viola next.
OP'S husband is being an àss. Either he comes up with suggestions, or shut the hell up and settle for one of the names on the list. And guys? Some of those names may not be what you or I would choose, but she's getting nothing but grief from the (in)significant other, and at least she's trying. So cut her some slack, okay?
He needs to come up with some ideas or stfu. I would suggest each of them not talking about names for two weeks, then coming back with a written list of names they like and see if there's anything the same or at least similar and go from there, but it sounds like the sperm donor would not want to bother.
As a retired school registrar, please don't give your child a name that they can't find on a souvenir.
Etta James was a great blues/jazz singer. I'd be pleased to carry her name.
Yes! She's a god. I was like whadaya mean it does sound like a real name??? He sounds like an ahole
Load More Replies...I don't like any of those names either, but he can't just turn her ideas down without offering some suggestions of his own. There are also great websites that let you narrow down choices, or suggest names based on a choice. I find the idea weird that men would care more about boys' names and women about girls'. You are both the parents and should care.
I thought they were going to be "tragedeigh" names but actually they're all incredibly posh. Not Tarquin and Jocasta posh but not too far off. Not objectionable but not to everyone's taste
Tell him you are going to namer her Karen, then ask to speak to a manager when he hates it.
Name the kid after some decaeased-but-beloved relative: a grandmother or great aunt or something. The Elizabeths in my family go back generations.
When we found out I was having a girl, I wanted to name he Phoenix. I liked the nickname Nix. My husband hated it, lol. No worries. Margot was actually one of the names on our list, so was Mabel and Madeline. We ended up with Maeve and she is totally 100% a Maeve. Irish attitude and all!
Giving the father a chance to come up with a whole bunch of names and telling what's wrong with them would be the way to go - at least in my mind. Also hearing the reasons Etta and Penelope are not an option
To be fair, those names suck. We just had a baby girl and there's zero chance I would have agreed to any of those names. But yes, he needs to have suggestions of his own and she can see if she likes any of those. We both did lists and then shot down ones we hated or saved likable ones for later, eventually narrowing it down to one favorite name that became our daughter's name.
He needs to produce a list of names he likes with some parameters like nothing in the top 25. Just vetoing what you like isn’t productive. Btw, I like Margot.
I am a teacher and the names that these people give these kids are odd to say the least and are difficult to pronounce. Then I have others that want to be called by their preferred names because they hate the name their parents gave them.
Her husband has a trust issue. Look at the challenge from his perspective. Choosing the right name feels like a big responsibility to him. What if his child is bullied in the future because of the given name? He already feels guilty. Make a personal list of favorite names and let him choose from it. He will never be able to choose from the large universe of possible names.
I hate ultimatums, but this might be a case where it is needed. Basically tell him that he ahs a week to come up with a list of 10 names (maybe 20) or you will be naming your child.
No idea why he hasn't any ideas to suggest, but I agree with him about her list. This from someone who named a child "Rainbow", over 40 years later she still speaks to me.
I suspect the husband is just fed up with OP going on about it and the quickest way to shut the conversation down is just to dismiss the names.
Actually, the quickest way to shut the conversation down is to fully participate in it, come up with a name that they both agree on, and then let it go until the child is born. No more irritating discussions then.
Load More Replies...Only because you're North American and pronounce Ts as Ds. The rest of the world pronounces it the correct way.
Load More Replies...God , shes bad at this. Talk about hideous names. Why don't you just buy a baby name book and go through it with your hubby one evening?
Kind of hard to do if he refuses to make any suggestions...
Load More Replies...Those aren't names I would choose, but I think the point is that the husband should be helping choose a name.
Load More Replies...
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