Husband Makes A Selfish Decision To Bring A Kitten Home Without Considering His Family’s Feelings
Interview With ExpertAdopting a furry companion is a life-changing experience because pets can provide wonderful companionship, love, and tons of entertainment. Even though having a cat or dog sounds like a lot of fun, it definitely requires effort and patience. That’s why you shouldn’t just adopt an animal on a whim.
Even if you’ve always wanted a four-legged friend, there’s a lot of thought that should go into the decision first. You definitely shouldn’t just pick up a kitten and spring it on your unsuspecting family, like this guy.
More info: Mumsnet
Adopting a pet shouldn’t be a rushed decision, it requires a lot of forethought
Image credits: Anna Keibalo /Unsplash (not the actual photo)
The poster explained that her husband always wanted a cat, but she and her two sons never wanted to get a pet for their house, especially as her older son was quite against the idea
Image credits: Cats Coming / Pexels (not the actual photo)
Despite knowing how much his family didn’t want a pet, the husband brought home a kitten one day without telling anyone
Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
When the man was asked if his family just had to accept his impulsive decision, he said yes, meaning that he didn’t care if his family felt uncomfortable having a pet around
Image credits: WinkyTinky
The poster was annoyed as she and her kids would have to take on the stress of looking after the kitten because she knew her husband wasn’t very responsible
You probably know of situations where kids have pleaded with their parents to get them a pet, even if they’re not responsible enough to own one. In this story, the tables were turned. The poster’s irresponsible husband just went out and got a kitten even though his family didn’t want to own one. He didn’t care that his kids were uncomfortable with the idea and that a pet would stress his wife out.
To understand more about adopting a pet and the best way to go about it, Bored Panda reached out to MeloCat. Known to just make things work, no matter how difficult, MeloCat cares for a large family of rescued and adopted cats, including special needs cats, feeder mice, and feeder fish.
Through her travels, MeloCat, the cat guardian, offers heartwarming stories and practical how-tos, encouraging everyone to make a difference and never just walk by in a world where animals lack a voice. Based on this story, we asked her if it’s okay for someone to surprise their family with a pet.
She told us that “a ‘surprise’ pet might only be appropriate if the person is certain their family is fully prepared, mentally, physically, and financially for the responsibility. Bringing home a pet can bring joy, but it can also create unforeseen burdens if the family isn’t fully on board or ready for the commitment.”
She also explained that “it’s important to have a candid conversation. A few things to consider are:
- The family member’s age.
- Longevity of the pet.
- The type of care the pet requires, [and] the financial and emotional toll it might take on the family.
- Whether the pet is suitable for the household (e.g., housing restrictions, noise, or space concerns).
- The stability of family dynamics and future plans.
We also contacted Petra Luna, the creator of the CatCrazy channel, for her opinion on this situation. She told us that “surprising a family with a kitten can be a sweet gesture, but it’s important to think things through to make sure it’s a ‘pawsitive’ experience for everyone involved, especially the cat!”
“Adding a furry family member is a big and long-term commitment, so make sure everyone is on board. Doing some research on what cats need is key before diving in. Check for cat allergies in your family, make sure you have enough space, and see if your lifestyle is a good fit for a cat,” Petra added.
Image credits: cookie_studio / Freepik (not the actual photo)
Getting an animal as a gift is a huge life-changing experience, so it’s understandable that the receiver might be shocked. Some pet experts state that if one’s partner adopts an animal without asking, the anger and frustration felt might not just be about the pet. It often stems from a feeling of hurt that one’s companion would make such big life decisions without even asking them.
That’s exactly how the woman felt. She even shared that when her husband went to work, she would be alone with the kitten and care for it. Even when her son was home alone, he’d have to figure out how to grapple with the cat’s needs. So, the family felt like their entire lives were upturned by the dad’s impulsive actions.
To understand how the man could have approached the situation differently, we asked MeloCat what a person should be prepared for before adopting a cat or any pet. She said that “pets aren’t fluffy toys. They are sentient beings with their own needs and emotions. As they say, ‘To us, they may be a pet, but to them, we are their entire world.’”
“Here are some key points to consider:
- Lifespan: domestic short-haired cats, for instance, can live 12 to 20 years; cockatoos 40 to 60 years!
- Companionship: most animals need interaction/companionship; consider their well-being when you’re not home. Are they staring at four walls all day?
- Financial responsibility: like us, pets will require more medical care as they age. Preventative care, diagnostics, and treatments = $$$!
- Life circumstances: life can change: new jobs, new homes, health issues. Do you have contingency plans?”
All of MeloCat’s questions are designed to make a person carefully consider their decision to adopt a pet. Based on the dad’s actions, it’s clear that he didn’t do any thinking or planning at all. He just wanted a cat and decided to make his long-time wish come true. But by doing so, he did a big disservice to the animal and to his family.
CatCrazy Petra also added that “it’s a good idea to involve the whole family in the decision-making process. Don’t forget about the financial side of things: food, vet visits, grooming, and toys can add up. Make sure your home is cat-proof with all the essentials like a bed, tree, litter box, bowls, scratching post, and grooming tools. Keep any dangerous stuff out of reach, too.”
“Think ahead about vet care and pet insurance, and have a plan in case of emergencies or vacations. It might seem like a lot, but it can be a fun process that brings your family closer together. By being prepared and fully committed, you’ll ensure your new furry friend gets all the love and care they need, and your family can enjoy the experience together,” Petra explained.
As MeloCat stated: “A pet, surprise or not, can’t be a surprise for long. You have to think of yourself as a parent, not a shopper. Adopting a pet is a lifelong commitment, one you have to keep, even if your own world shifts!”
The poster and her family were absolutely in the right to be angry at the man for his rash decision. We can only hope they managed to sort out the situation in the best way possible for themselves and the animal.
Folks were concerned about the kitten and urged the poster to convince her husband to rehome it
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Headline should be: "Woman Hates Her Husband and Her Life Oh Yeah And Theres a Kitten Now". Like, this family clearly is not doing well, the kitten is beside the point
Exactly. The switch flips when it turns out that having brought it home, he can’t be bothered to give it any attention, or learn how to care for it properly. I can’t tell if it was a deliberate provocation, or if he’s just a selfish idiot who sees the cat as a home furnishing instead of a small furry feline person. But he’s clearly the AH, and the family is not overreacting.
Load More Replies...Seriously? The oldest son, a college age guy, started to CRY because his dad brought a cat home?! 12yo "doesn't want to come home if the kitten is there too"?! I agree, pets should be discussed before moving them in. But crying and refusing to go home are major overreactions to a friggin' kitten.
It wasn't just the kitten mewing loudly - the oldest is neurodiverse. It can be hard for a neurotypical person to imagine what it's like to be set off my one thing too many. Sometimes the most compassionate approach to differences is to tell oneself, "I may not understand this, but I can still try to treat the other person with respect."
Load More Replies...OP really impressed her kids with her own dislike of indoor pets. Never having had one, the kids wouldn't develop that opinion on their own without a lot of negativity and doom from mom. "Oh, they're a lot of work, they're messy, they'll throw up in your shoes, YOU will have to be completely responsible for cleaning up after them, so you'll have to drop an after school activity. We won't be able to go on vacation and leave it home alone. . .. Now, who wants a pet?" OP should rehome the kitten & tell hubby it must have escaped thru the gaps in the fence. It would have a better life away from this family.
If rehoming is done in this way, she is being just as dishonest and inconsiderate as he was in bringing the cat home in the first place and does no consider the family dynamics or the kitten's welfare.
Load More Replies...Headline should be: "Woman Hates Her Husband and Her Life Oh Yeah And Theres a Kitten Now". Like, this family clearly is not doing well, the kitten is beside the point
Exactly. The switch flips when it turns out that having brought it home, he can’t be bothered to give it any attention, or learn how to care for it properly. I can’t tell if it was a deliberate provocation, or if he’s just a selfish idiot who sees the cat as a home furnishing instead of a small furry feline person. But he’s clearly the AH, and the family is not overreacting.
Load More Replies...Seriously? The oldest son, a college age guy, started to CRY because his dad brought a cat home?! 12yo "doesn't want to come home if the kitten is there too"?! I agree, pets should be discussed before moving them in. But crying and refusing to go home are major overreactions to a friggin' kitten.
It wasn't just the kitten mewing loudly - the oldest is neurodiverse. It can be hard for a neurotypical person to imagine what it's like to be set off my one thing too many. Sometimes the most compassionate approach to differences is to tell oneself, "I may not understand this, but I can still try to treat the other person with respect."
Load More Replies...OP really impressed her kids with her own dislike of indoor pets. Never having had one, the kids wouldn't develop that opinion on their own without a lot of negativity and doom from mom. "Oh, they're a lot of work, they're messy, they'll throw up in your shoes, YOU will have to be completely responsible for cleaning up after them, so you'll have to drop an after school activity. We won't be able to go on vacation and leave it home alone. . .. Now, who wants a pet?" OP should rehome the kitten & tell hubby it must have escaped thru the gaps in the fence. It would have a better life away from this family.
If rehoming is done in this way, she is being just as dishonest and inconsiderate as he was in bringing the cat home in the first place and does no consider the family dynamics or the kitten's welfare.
Load More Replies...
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