Get an education they say. It will prepare you for the road ahead they say.
Lies.
Okay maybe not all lies. I know how to draw using fancy gizmos and help my kids with some of their homework. But nothing can really prepare you for parenthood. Here are just a few examples of the things I was unprepared for :
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How To Teach Privacy
How To Freeze Time
How To Stop Kids From Doing Anything
How To Be A Stealthy Ninja
How To Raise Decent Human Beings
How To Swallow Your Emotions
How To Stop This From Happening
How To Stop The Crying
How To Accept The Title Of Chopped Liver
How To Save Lives
How To Tell A Lie From Another Lie
How To Break The Hard Truth
How To Reason
How To Sleep Train
This is exactly what happens in our house, especially the last picture 😂 IN YO FACE, LITERALLY!!!
How To One Up This
How To Be Nurturing
How To Keep A Steady Heart Rate
Notice how dads never move. I always hear, aw honey I didn't even hear or I'd have helped. Insert eye roll.