Living with roommates always requires some compromises. You might need to play your music quieter than usual and coordinate meal times around one another to take turns in the kitchen. But is it fair for someone to dictate how you’re allowed to shower just because you live together? 

Below, you’ll find a story that one woman recently shared on the “Am I the [Jerk]?” subreddit detailing how she shocked one of her roommates by informing him that she does in fact shower while on her period. 

This woman’s roommate was shocked to find out that she takes showers while she’s on her period

Image credits: cottonbro studio (not the actual photo)

Now, he’s trying to ban her from bleeding anywhere in their shared bathroom

Image credits: Karolina Grabowska (not the actual photo)

Image credits: Hannah Xu (not the actual photo)

Image credits:  Sidekix Media (not the actual photo)

Image credits:  Cliff Booth (not the actual photo)

Image credits: Clay Banks (not the actual photo)

Image credits: LaughingHousemateTA

Unfortunately, it’s common for men to have a limited understanding of menstruation

Image credits:  Sora Shimazaki (not the actual photo)

As sad as it may sound, it’s not incredibly surprising that this man has a limited understanding of how menstruation works and how women behave while on their periods. According to a study conducted by INTIMA, 14% of men say they’ve actually never had a conversation with women about periods, and a quarter of men believe that women have to remove tampons to be able to urinate. A third of men noted that they don’t think it’s right for men to discuss menstruation, as a third also feel uncomfortable around the topic, and a quarter admitted that they don’t even know enough about periods to hold a conversation about them.

Unfortunately, because of the lack of education men receive about periods, there’s often a stigma associated with them. One in five girls and young women in the UK say they’ve been teased or bullied about having their period, and apparently, 44% of men admit to having made comments about a partner’s mood while she was menstruating. Over half of men also think it’s inappropriate for periods to be discussed in the workplace. A study by THINX found that 58% of women in the US have felt embarrassed while on their periods, and 42% have actually experienced period-shaming, often due to comments made by male friends or family members.  

Because of this, periods often carry an unfair stigma

Women often feel pressure to conceal the fact that they’re on their periods, as revealing this information can sometimes lead to dramatic overreactions like the woman in this story experienced from her roommate. Menstrual Hygiene Day reports that 73% of women say they have hid a pad or tampon from view while making their way to the bathroom, and nearly a third have canceled plans like swimming or exercising for fear that someone would notice they were on their period.

47% of women also admit that they tend to use euphemisms to refer to menstruation as well, to try to sound more “palatable.” They might use “time of the month,” “monthly visitor,” “mother nature,” and more to avoid making others uncomfortable. This might be because men typically have no problem sharing their disgust for periods.

One study found that many men consider women to be “less clean and less attractive” while menstruating, and a third of men describe period sex as “gross” and “inappropriate.” One research project at Lyon Business School even found that some men associate menstrual blood with bodily waste and feces, rather than blood from any other part of the body.

The reality is that menstruating is perfectly normal and natural

Image credits: Andrea Piacquadio (not the actual photo)

Menstruation is one of the most natural occurrences that takes place in our world, as none of us would even be able to be here without having a mother who menstruated. About 1.8 billion people around the globe, or about a quarter of the world’s population, have a period every month. Every single day, about 800 million women and girls are menstruating. There is no reason for something so normal to be stigmatized and considered shameful or gross. It’s important to educate girls and boys about periods starting from a young age, so men don’t grow up being grossed out by their female roommates who are simply trying to take a shower.

We would love to hear your thoughts on this situation in the comments below, pandas. If you’re a woman, have you ever lived with a roommate who made you feel guilty about menstruating? Or are you a man who actually understands that periods are nothing to be ashamed of? Feel free to share, and then if you’re interested in reading another Bored Panda article, we recommend checking out one that also discusses the stigma around periods!  

Readers assured the woman that she did nothing wrong, noting that her roommate was being ridiculous

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