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Daughter Is Upset Her Parents Only Listen To Her When They Need Money, So She Doesn’t Give Them Any Despite Them Being Homeless
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Daughter Is Upset Her Parents Only Listen To Her When They Need Money, So She Doesn’t Give Them Any Despite Them Being Homeless

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It’s a weird feeling to realize that your parents actually don’t know everything and that they can make mistakes with their decisions. When you are little, you rely on your parents to be guided through life and it seems that they have everything together and always know what the next step is.

You may go through your rebellious teenage stage, but when you grow up, you realize that your parents don’t have a clear understanding of how the world works and you may have more experience with it. Reddit user snd19i tried to explain to her parents that they were making poor financial decisions, but they ignored her and now are asking her to give them money, which she thinks she shouldn’t do.

More info: Reddit

Woman is tired of her parents spending money irresponsibly and is not willing to give them her own even though they are homeless

Image credits: James Abbott (not the actual photo)

The Original Poster (OP) is 27 years old and she isn’t living with her parents anymore and wouldn’t want to because they are that terrible with money. When she was little, her dad invested all of the family savings of $100k in penny stocks that he lost during the 2008 economic crisis. The family of three had to move into a bedroom, but that didn’t teach the parents a lesson.

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The mom joined an MLM and, of course, she lost money. But that didn’t stop the parents from trying to take an illegal loan from the government just to be scammed by a broker that the daughter warned them about. She actually tried to take away the pen her dad was signing the contract with, but he screamed at her and just ignored all of the evidence she was providing them with.

The OP’s parents made one bad financial decision after another that led the family to live together in just one bedroom

Image credits: snd19i

Now the parents are living in their car and don’t have money for even the cheapest apartments. They turned for help to their only daughter, who has $100k saved for her future home, and want some of that money.

The daughter has a good feeling that the parents will not know how to handle that money, so she is not lending them any of it. She also doesn’t want to let them move in with her because she lives with a roommate and they have a rule of allowing visitors for up to a week.

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Although they are her parents, the OP finds it hard to feel sympathetic towards them because she did warn them about their bad decisions, but they didn’t listen and turned to her only when they needed money.

When the OP grew up, her parents got involved in a scam that left them homeless

Image credits: snd19i

The experience of not having a stable financial situation made the OP very aware of how much she spends and how important it is to save and invest smartly. She didn’t eat out and would wear the same clothes all the time. She doesn’t have a car, uses public transportation and shares an apartment with a roommate. At 27 years old, she has $100,000 in savings, but she had to sacrifice a lot not to end up like her parents.

She warned them and tried to stop them from losing their money, but they completely ignored her

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Image credits: snd19i

Growing up poor and seeing your parents lose their home and a lot of money affects a person and how they will not only handle money when they grow up, but how they will behave in general because of their conception of control.

According to research published by the American Psychological Association, people who grew up poor tend to be more impulsive in uncertain situations and have a lower sense of control over their lives and their future.

This is also confirmed by a report by Sheehy-Skeffington and Jessica Rea that showed that “People living in poverty make decisions focused on coping with present stressful circumstances, often at the expense of future goals.”

Now they are asking for money and a place to live, but the daughter thinks it was their fault that they ended up in this situation

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Image credits: snd19i

Image credits: Joe Green (not the actual photo)

Some people who escape poverty might be very careless with their money, like Rick Morton, who reveals in his book 100 Years of Dirt that he doesn’t count money any longer like his mother did because he doesn’t have to now that he receives a good salary; however, it leads to stupid decisions concerning money.

For the OP, growing up poor had an opposite effect. It may have to do with the fact that she ended up in such a situation because of her parents’ irresponsible financial decisions and she realized that spending money leads to not having it at all.

The woman admits that she was traumatized by the childhood she had and doesn’t want to perpetuate her parents’ bad spending habits. Do you think she should lend them some money so they can have a roof over their head instead of living in their car? Do you think they have the right to ask for it? Let us know your thoughts in the comments!

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People online agreed that her parents were grown adults who made bad decisions and didn’t listen to her when she tried to stop them, so she doesn’t owe them anything

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Jurgita Dominauskaitė

Jurgita Dominauskaitė

Writer, BoredPanda staff

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Having started as a content creator that made articles for Bored Panda from scratch I climbed my way up to being and editor and then had team lead responsibilities added as well. So it was a pretty natural transition from writing articles and titles as well as preparing the visual part for the articles to making sure others are doing those same tasks as I did before well, answering their questions and guiding them when needed. Eventually I realized editing gives me the most enjoyment and I'm focusing only on that right now.

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Jurgita Dominauskaitė

Jurgita Dominauskaitė

Writer, BoredPanda staff

Having started as a content creator that made articles for Bored Panda from scratch I climbed my way up to being and editor and then had team lead responsibilities added as well. So it was a pretty natural transition from writing articles and titles as well as preparing the visual part for the articles to making sure others are doing those same tasks as I did before well, answering their questions and guiding them when needed. Eventually I realized editing gives me the most enjoyment and I'm focusing only on that right now.

Saulė Tolstych

Saulė Tolstych

Author, Community member

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Saulė is a photo editor at Bored Panda with bachelor's degree in Multimedia and Computer Design. The thing that relaxes her the best is going into YouTube rabbit hole. In her free time she loves painting, embroidering and taking walks in nature.

Read less »

Saulė Tolstych

Saulė Tolstych

Author, Community member

Saulė is a photo editor at Bored Panda with bachelor's degree in Multimedia and Computer Design. The thing that relaxes her the best is going into YouTube rabbit hole. In her free time she loves painting, embroidering and taking walks in nature.

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Tams21
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I think her actions were absolutely fair. It's hard seeing family, particularly siblings or parents struggling. She did everything she could to help her parents but they clearly rejected it, so at some point she has to start protecting herself. Inviting family into your home is a risk at the best of times, in this situation it could end up being a nightmare.

Nicole Herron
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

They're adults who should know better. We don't have any responsibility for our parents just because they raised us.

Rider
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

She needs to check her credit report regularly. I would be afraid of her parents stealing her identity.

Honu
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yes. And you can lock your credit with the reporting agencies and only unlock it when you are applying for credit. I did that back when they had that huge data breach. Sadly, I've had several friends over the years with parents like this who had absolutely trashed credit. Aside from loans or cards, they couldn't even rent apartments or open accounts for utilities in their own names because their parents had used their information and had evictions and thousands of dollars in delinquencies to the utility companies.

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Tams21
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I think her actions were absolutely fair. It's hard seeing family, particularly siblings or parents struggling. She did everything she could to help her parents but they clearly rejected it, so at some point she has to start protecting herself. Inviting family into your home is a risk at the best of times, in this situation it could end up being a nightmare.

Nicole Herron
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

They're adults who should know better. We don't have any responsibility for our parents just because they raised us.

Rider
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

She needs to check her credit report regularly. I would be afraid of her parents stealing her identity.

Honu
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yes. And you can lock your credit with the reporting agencies and only unlock it when you are applying for credit. I did that back when they had that huge data breach. Sadly, I've had several friends over the years with parents like this who had absolutely trashed credit. Aside from loans or cards, they couldn't even rent apartments or open accounts for utilities in their own names because their parents had used their information and had evictions and thousands of dollars in delinquencies to the utility companies.

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