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Birds are a universal part of our ecosystem, from the clueless-looking pidgin to sparrows that zip by at extremely high speeds. The ability to fly equips them to be particularly immune from repercussions, so it’s no surprise that avians seem to have no qualms about taking our stuff, eating our food, and then flying away before any consequences can be felt. 

The “Birds being Jerks” online group gathers examples of birds with little to no regard for humans and our stuff. So get comfortable and upvote your favorite examples as you scroll through. Be sure to comment your own bird stories and tales.

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    #2

    My Dickbag Bird

    My Dickbag Bird

    LoloDoe Report

    When you take into consideration the evolutionary nature of birds, it makes more sense that they might have an inclination towards jerkdom. Scientists believe that birds are the modern incarnation of dinosaurs like the velociraptor of “Jurrasic Park” fame. You might notice the word raptor, which we still use to describe various birds of prey. 

    They are still pretty unique in the modern world, as they are the only animals with feathers. The only exception to this is the kiwi, which is furry and flightless, much like the fruit. They also lay eggs, despite being warm-blooded, much to the benefit of our breakfast. One thing modern birds do not really have anymore is teeth, as their ancestors often did still retain some to access a more varied diet.

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    #5

    Crow Rides On The Back Of A Bald Eagle

    Crow Rides On The Back Of A Bald Eagle

    wilsonpmPfgdrg5 Report

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    malaixa
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ah yes, the crow and the bald eagle - the odd couple of the bird world. It's a classic case of a small bird with big dreams, hitching a ride on the shoulders of a bald eagle, the ultimate symbol of freedom and majesty. I suppose it just goes to show that no matter how different we may seem on the surface, we can all find common ground when we're in it together. Or maybe that crow is just trying to save his energy for the next heist.

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    #6

    I Think We Have A Criminal Here

    I Think We Have A Criminal Here

    itamar_farkash9 Report

    Feathers give birds all sorts of benefits, from flight, insulation, and protection against water. The flip side is that it ends up requiring them to spend almost 10% of their time just grooming and preening. Reflecting their dinosaur heritage, some birds also have scales, primarily on their toes. The ability to fly comes with the need for rapid digestion and very quick metabolism. 

    #7

    This Peacock Pecked At His Own Reflection On A Bmw For Over Half An Hour

    This Peacock Pecked At His Own Reflection On A Bmw For Over Half An Hour

    Sosumi_rogue Report

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    Kobe
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I was here first - you little sh*t ! move ! I said, move.. !

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    #8

    Fuck The Law

    Fuck The Law

    tabanhere Report

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    #9

    No Respect For The Rules

    No Respect For The Rules

    DavDon18 Report

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    malaixa
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well, it's no surprise that birds are breaking the rules. After all, they've been flying under the radar for far too long. But shaming them on the internet? Nah... That's just fowl play!

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    Some can also mimic the noises of other animals, including humans. Parrots are pretty famous for taking on the mannerisms and expressions used by their owners, while crows can mimic the sounds of predators. They use this to attract said predators to carcasses, allowing wolves or bears to split open the dead animal and gain access to the meat inside. 

    #10

    I Love Parrots But Don't Insult The Arsonist

    I Love Parrots But Don't Insult The Arsonist

    _Throwaway54_ Report

    #12

    Help I Lost My Lovebird In This Pile Of Mangoes!

    Help I Lost My Lovebird In This Pile Of Mangoes!

    sqnu Report

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    Loverboy
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm embarrassed at how long that took me to see. Tbf it's late and I'm tired

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    #15

    Dick Left Alone With An Open Laptop

    Dick Left Alone With An Open Laptop

    Vall3y Report

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    KittyGotClaws
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "I want this one, no this one! How about this one over there? Noooo, this one's better! Oooops... Hi hooman!"

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    #16

    Hes Figured Out How To Open The Seed Dispenser

    Hes Figured Out How To Open The Seed Dispenser

    keta9919 Report

    #17

    Blursed Parrot

    Blursed Parrot

    birb_in_disguise Report

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    Feathered Dinosaur
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well, duh, haven't you seen all the Jurassic Park movies? We are expected to bite and hunt and stuff...

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    #18

    Thanks For Rescuing Us From The Brink Of Extinction And All, But

    Thanks For Rescuing Us From The Brink Of Extinction And All, But

    SeanaLyn , SeanaLyn Report

    #19

    German Chancellor Angela Merkel At A Bird Park

    German Chancellor Angela Merkel At A Bird Park

    ledtosea Report

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    David Paterson
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Rainbow lorikeets! The most commonly seen wild bird in Australia. Very little fear of humans. A wildlife park in Queensland regularly pranks tourists like this. An unforgettable experience. There's a photo of young me in exactly the same situation.

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    #20

    Poor Baby Hippo Never Hurt A Fly

    Poor Baby Hippo Never Hurt A Fly

    poliscijunki Report

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    #22

    This Speaks For Itself

    This Speaks For Itself

    reddit.com Report

    #23

    This One Has Made My Balcony His Territory... Tries To Scratch Me If I'm Outside

    This One Has Made My Balcony His Territory... Tries To Scratch Me If I'm Outside

    BD_secureIT Report

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    Loverboy
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Look at those talons and that beak. That balcony belongs to her now, unless you want serious injury I suggest you surrender it.

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    #24

    An Atlantic Puffin (Joe) Who Doesn't Like To Share

    An Atlantic Puffin (Joe) Who Doesn't Like To Share

    Saarg095 Report

    #27

    These Birds Getting Plastered Off Fermented Cherries In Our Backyard

    These Birds Getting Plastered Off Fermented Cherries In Our Backyard

    dajung21 Report

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    KittyGotClaws
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why are there cherries leftover on the tree? You should've baked them into a pie!

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    #30

    This Swan Has Been Enforcing The Stay At Home Order Outside My House For The Last Three Days

    This Swan Has Been Enforcing The Stay At Home Order Outside My House For The Last Three Days

    ganggangletsdie Report

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    Loverboy
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Swans/geese are douches. I have been attacked by two and they are so f*****g mean

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    #32

    Asshole Pelicans

    Asshole Pelicans

    reddit.com Report

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    David Paterson
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    They won't eat children, but they have been known to eat pigeons and small mammals. I know a place where the pelicans are regularly fed, daily. They are friendly birds, not aggressive.

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    #33

    This Asshole And Her Bullshit Crumbs Everywhere

    This Asshole And Her Bullshit Crumbs Everywhere

    weaponized_glitter Report

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    KittyGotClaws
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I don't know, I'd be more worried about how she's eyeing me now that her snack it's gone.

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    #34

    Magpie Kiss

    Magpie Kiss

    g_nome7 Report

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    Bron
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Just yesterday, I discovered hubby of 23 years has a scar behind his ear from where a maggie pecked him

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    #35

    Memphis Hawks Don’t Let You Mess With Their Eggs…

    Memphis Hawks Don’t Let You Mess With Their Eggs…

    Hungry-Influence3108 Report

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    malaixa
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well, it's clear that this Memphis hawk take her egg protection duties very seriously. I guess they don't want anyone else to hatch a plan for those precious supermarket eggs. But let's be honest, this hawk is just winging it when it comes to grocery store etiquette.

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    #36

    Seagulls Are The Worst

    Seagulls Are The Worst

    const_bigMan Report

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    malaixa
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Seagulls are like the in-laws of the bird world. They swoop in uninvited, make a huge mess, and refuse to leave until they've eaten everything in sight.

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    #37

    Birds Ate My Handmade Paper Star (Took Me Weeks To Make)

    Birds Ate My Handmade Paper Star (Took Me Weeks To Make)

    pyromaic_sofa Report

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    #39

    This Is Comfortable

    This Is Comfortable

    Few-Succotash-3047 Report

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    Loverboy
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's a nice photo, but it doesn't really belong here. He's a derp, not a d**k.

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    #40

    This Guy Was Screaming At Me For The Whole 3 Minutes I Was Packing My Scooter. Loud Af. Pretty Badass Looking Imo

    This Guy Was Screaming At Me For The Whole 3 Minutes I Was Packing My Scooter. Loud Af. Pretty Badass Looking Imo

    NoYou5184 Report

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    Loverboy
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That bird will find where you live and call the gang to s**t on all your windows.

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    #41

    My Eyes Are Up Here

    My Eyes Are Up Here

    Radarnikko Report

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    Stardust she/her
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This website censors words like “c**p” but it’s completely fine for them to have this picture of boobies posted here? Atrocious! /s

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    #42

    Really, No Caption Is Needed Here

    Really, No Caption Is Needed Here

    Shadow647 Report

    #43

    Both Seats Are Occupied

    Both Seats Are Occupied

    Jacksqi Report

    #44

    The Cockatoos Here Have A Problem With The Lawyers

    The Cockatoos Here Have A Problem With The Lawyers

    milkaddictedkitty Report

    #45

    Today I Was Rushing Around Because I Had To Get To The Airport. And Then I Hear Something In My Wood Stove Pipe. This Guy Is Lucky That Only Two Screws Held The Bottom Of The Pipe On. I Am Happy He Is Free!

    Today I Was Rushing Around Because I Had To Get To The Airport. And Then I Hear Something In My Wood Stove Pipe. This Guy Is Lucky That Only Two Screws Held The Bottom Of The Pipe On. I Am Happy He Is Free!

    BlackSeranna Report

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    #46

    I Think This Belongs Here

    I Think This Belongs Here

    Salaxor Report

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    #47

    ❤️💙 Cardinal Being Angry At A Blue Jay 💙❤️

    ❤️💙 Cardinal Being Angry At A Blue Jay 💙❤️

    Kuma_Paws_376 Report

    #49

    They Just Agreed On A Way To Simultaneously Break And Shit On The Window

    They Just Agreed On A Way To Simultaneously Break And Shit On The Window

    GiordanoBette Report

    #50

    Figured Out Why My Clothes Haven't Been Drying

    Figured Out Why My Clothes Haven't Been Drying

    reddit.com Report

    #52

    When You Want To Play Backgammon But You're Overlord Has Other Plans

    When You Want To Play Backgammon But You're Overlord Has Other Plans

    OliveThePenguin Report

    #53

    These Are My Domestic Geese. Spikey Has Angel Wing Syndrome In Both Wings, Matthew Grey Goose Gubler Is Not Amused By Anything And Bleach Just Screams All The Time. It’s Like Living With A Tornado Siren

    These Are My Domestic Geese. Spikey Has Angel Wing Syndrome In Both Wings, Matthew Grey Goose Gubler Is Not Amused By Anything And Bleach Just Screams All The Time. It’s Like Living With A Tornado Siren

    iseeksilence Report

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    #54

    Thank You For The Immense Amount Of Love Shown To Spikey, Bleach And Matthew Grey Goose Gubler. Here Is A Selfie They Recently Took. As Always, Bleach Is The One Screaming Into The Void, And Matthew Grey Goose Gubler Is The One Who Looks So Mad That His Hemorrhoids Are Gonna Pop

    Thank You For The Immense Amount Of Love Shown To Spikey, Bleach And Matthew Grey Goose Gubler. Here Is A Selfie They Recently Took. As Always, Bleach Is The One Screaming Into The Void, And Matthew Grey Goose Gubler Is The One Who Looks So Mad That His Hemorrhoids Are Gonna Pop

    iseeksilence Report

    #55

    Egret Standing On An Anti-Bird Platform, Not Giving A Crap

    Egret Standing On An Anti-Bird Platform, Not Giving A Crap

    jamesbond000111 Report

    #57

    Venetian Pigeon In A Local Store Sitting On Some Raw Pasta

    Venetian Pigeon In A Local Store Sitting On Some Raw Pasta

    flaminhotchick Report

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    malaixa
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's not every day you see a pigeon making a scene in a local store. I guess that pigeon really wanted to make a fusilli over his meal choice. But let's hope he didn't ruffle any feathers with his impromptu pasta perch.

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    #58

    Finally Figured Out Why I Keep Coming Home To Little Poops All Over The House

    Finally Figured Out Why I Keep Coming Home To Little Poops All Over The House

    Megalapteryx95 Report

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    David Paterson
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    European blackbird. Quite friendly. They hang around when you're gardening in the hope of eating any grubs you dig up.

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    #59

    He Probably Is

    He Probably Is

    thatoneguy9988 Report

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    Amy
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Everyone heard the Law and Order sound when they read the screen right?

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    #61

    Just Want To Scroll In Peace

    Just Want To Scroll In Peace

    nemisette Report

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    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    i was waiting for the ringnecks to show up. my little brat gets into everything

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    #62

    As I Was Pulling Away From A Job, These 2 Pricks Decided To Occupy My Toolbox And Refuse Leave

    As I Was Pulling Away From A Job, These 2 Pricks Decided To Occupy My Toolbox And Refuse Leave

    Rykedan Report

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    Bree
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Muscovy ducks: https://fortmyers.floridaweekly.com/articles/misunderstood-mistreated-maligned-muscovy-2/

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    #64

    He Must Be Fixing Them?

    He Must Be Fixing Them?

    hominemferreum Report

    #65

    I Left The Room For Two Minutes, Heard A Squawk, And Returned To This Look Of Absolute Triumph

    I Left The Room For Two Minutes, Heard A Squawk, And Returned To This Look Of Absolute Triumph

    clemfairie Report

    #67

    This Bird I Took A Picture Of's Shadow Reveals His True Personality

    This Bird I Took A Picture Of's Shadow Reveals His True Personality

    Akai_Hana Report

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    #68

    This A-Hole And Its Partner Are Destroying My Trim

    This A-Hole And Its Partner Are Destroying My Trim

    LiquidDreamtime Report

    #69

    Newborn Honeyguide Chicks Are Equipped With Deadly Hooks On Their Beaks. Immediately After Hatching, They Stab And Slaughter The Other Non-Honeyguide Chicks In The Nest

    Newborn Honeyguide Chicks Are Equipped With Deadly Hooks On Their Beaks. Immediately After Hatching, They Stab And Slaughter The Other Non-Honeyguide Chicks In The Nest

    Pardusco Report

    #70

    Stole The Broccoli Right Off My Plate!

    Stole The Broccoli Right Off My Plate!

    DesNewmanZA Report

    #71

    Not Sure If This Allowed, But Look At This Dick Respecting Social Distancing

    Not Sure If This Allowed, But Look At This Dick Respecting Social Distancing

    Tgreezie Report

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    KittyGotClaws
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    As long as he's not drawing a pentagram in that circle, we should be all right.

    #72

    Meet The Birds Who Cut Me Off To And From My Apartment Every Day

    Meet The Birds Who Cut Me Off To And From My Apartment Every Day

    iqueefkief Report

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    KittyGotClaws
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You've got to learn to stand up for yourself. Get out of that car and show them who's boss!

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    #73

    He Threw His Breakfast Dish And Made A Huge Mess. Then Did It Again When I Gave Him A New Dish. The Bowl Broke The Second Time And He Cheered

    He Threw His Breakfast Dish And Made A Huge Mess. Then Did It Again When I Gave Him A New Dish. The Bowl Broke The Second Time And He Cheered

    z0mbiegrl Report

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    #75

    Marqi, You Missing Something?ospreys Snag A Grocery Store Worker's Apron

    Marqi, You Missing Something?ospreys Snag A Grocery Store Worker's Apron

    tmgieger Report

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    Cara
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Errr are we sure the remains of the grocery store worker aren’t in the nest too?

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    #76

    Top 10 Pictures Taken Seconds Before A Disaster

    Top 10 Pictures Taken Seconds Before A Disaster

    MissGymlow Report

    #78

    I'm Just Going To Wait In Ambush For My Mum

    I'm Just Going To Wait In Ambush For My Mum

    fredericdrgt456rft Report

    #79

    These Two Mfs Entered My House While On Their Search For A Good Nesting Spot. And Then Pooped In One Of The Bedrooms

    These Two Mfs Entered My House While On Their Search For A Good Nesting Spot. And Then Pooped In One Of The Bedrooms

    soap_muncher Report

    #81

    The Sign Did Nothing

    The Sign Did Nothing

    stevemandudeguy Report

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    #82

    You Just Know Something Is Going Down Here

    You Just Know Something Is Going Down Here

    ajl009 Report

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    Tushar Roy Mukherjee
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The Bowery King called. There is a package that Camaro is transporting to the East Dock at 1900 hours. We need you two to keep an eye on the convoy.

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    #83

    This Is Bill. Bill Likes To Eat My Fish. Bill And I Have A Love/Hate Relationship

    This Is Bill. Bill Likes To Eat My Fish. Bill And I Have A Love/Hate Relationship

    Sharon411 Report

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    Purple light
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Looks like an ancient Japanese painting. (If you ignore the wicker seat)

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    #85

    Woodstock No

    Woodstock No

    Procrastin8r1 Report

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    #86

    That’s Okay I Don’t Want The Rest Of My Tea

    That’s Okay I Don’t Want The Rest Of My Tea

    kludgewerwer234 Report

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    RaRaPanda
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    There’s a bird on the clock app that just loves chamomile tea. It’s cute to watch her guzzle it down (didn’t know that’s okay for them to drink).

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    #87

    This Phot Was Taken Before He Walked In My Head And Took A Shit On Me

    This Phot Was Taken Before He Walked In My Head And Took A Shit On Me

    dank_memer108 Report

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    #89

    This Little Asshole

    This Little Asshole

    citrineandmoonstone Report

    #90

    Hi. I Broke Your Fire Remote. Need Dis Piece?

    Hi. I Broke Your Fire Remote. Need Dis Piece?

    reddit.com Report

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    KittyGotClaws
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You can start fires with a remote nowadays? Boy am i behind the times.

    #92

    Reddit Meet Macca

    Reddit Meet Macca

    Gaming_Birb Report

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    kath morgan
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    They love to sit on glasses, ours was the same way with my dad. Lovely colours :)

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    #93

    Dick Bird Wasted A Month Of Data

    Dick Bird Wasted A Month Of Data

    LCDRtomdodge Report

    #94

    We Don't Own A Bird

    We Don't Own A Bird

    OneGizmoIz Report

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    YTK
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My grandparents found a bird on a Chevrolet once, couldn’t find an owner, and took “Chevie” in as a pet

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    #95

    Thought She Fit Here Cuz She Is Always Rude And Mean

    Thought She Fit Here Cuz She Is Always Rude And Mean

    XxDaBerserkerxX Report

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