In the chamber, dim and dreary,
Lay N. alone, weak and weary.
'Neath the lamplight's flickering gleam,
Haunted by a fearful dream.

Outside, the tempest raged and roared,
Echoing the cries of those ignored.
Yet within, a tapping, soft and low,
Sent shivers down his spine aglow.

With every beat, his heart did race,
In the dark, a spectral face.
Whispers in the shadows deep,
Promised horrors, none could keep.

A message came, from realms unknown,
"I see you," it did intone.
N. trembled in the pallid light,
Trapped in dread, devoid of sight.

Oh, the terror, ever nigh,
As the tapping drew him nigh.
In the darkness, death did loom,
Sealing N.'s dreadful doom.

And thus, in Poe's macabre vein,
N. met his fate, bound by chain.
A tale of horror, dark and dire,
Echoes still, in haunted mire.

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Final score:

15points

The Troll (Legion)

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Rock a bye baby on the tree top
When the wind blows the cradle will rock.
I was that baby and what bothers me.
Is why my dear mum shoved me up a tree.

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Final score:

14points

IlovemydogShilo

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Mary had a little lamb...the doctors were surprised ...but when Old Macdonald had a farm ...they couldn't believe their eyes.

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Final score:

8points

trevor

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A wonderful bird is the pelican,
His bill holds more than his belican.
He can take in his beak,
Enough food for a week,
But I’m damned if I see how the helican.

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Final score:

8points

adrien

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Mary had a little lamb, she tied it to a pylon, 50,000 volts shot up its bum, we turned its wool to nylon.

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Final score:

7points

Nathaniel He/Him Cis-Het

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Roses are red
I have a slug named Dave
This poem makes no sense
Microwave

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Final score:

7points

Tiny bun

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A funny young fellow named Perkins, was terribly fond of small gherkins, one day after tea, He ate ninety-three and picked his internal workings.

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Final score:

6points

𝐸𝒶𝓇𝓉𝒽_𝒞𝒽𝒶𝓇𝓂𝑒𝓇

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Tinkle tinkle little kid
Potty training´s what I did
Up and down you go to pee
18 years and I´ll be free
tinkle tinkle little kid
Now we have a yellow lid.

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Final score:

5points

Nicky

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Here I sit, broken hearted.
Came to s**t, only farted

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Final score:

5points

Arnold Larkins

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I found this in an old google slide me and some friends worked on:
"Semi-Trucks
Running Over
Your Dead
Delicious
Body
:>"
I am a bit concerned by my past self

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Final score:

5points

Faye Drewit

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Not mine, but let me share this one by Bob Wiley (Bill Murray):
Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic and so am I.

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Final score:

5points

Ban-One

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As the Illuminati played dodgeball with the earth,
A walking coffee came on the hearth,
Of the fireplace in the land where the Freemasons lay,
And discovered that all were g@y.

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Final score:

5points

Aadith

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Your welcome
Was a nice one

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Final score:

4points

Panda Boi

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Have two. First is non-original

Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear
Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair
Fuzzy Wuzzy wasn't very fuzzy, was he?

~annnnd~

I turned your daughter to soup.
Lifted her up,
and slurped her down,
and then she turned to poop!

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Final score:

4points

Mike_the_nike

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A B C D E F G
GUMMY BEARS ARE CHASING ME
ONE IS RED
ONE IS BLUE
ONE IS CHEWING UP MY SHOE
NOW I'M RUNNING FOR MY LIFE
CUZ THE RED ONE'S GOT A KNIFE

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Final score:

4points

Alley Cat

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Roses are red, violets are blue, can you come here, and take a whiff of my shoe.

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Final score:

3points

Ai-Li Mae Sarvis

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Cows go moo,
Ducks go quack,
Geese go on the sidewalk,
Filthy animals.

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Final score:

3points

Mark Trombley

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When COVID hit
We all went 'sh*t'
The world went to hell
Many good people fell
And now we're left to recover

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Final score:

3points

Briards Are Best

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I couldn't catch an oystercatcher catching oysters.
I caught them catching clams. I caught them catching snails.
But oystercatchers ought to catch oysters, by gosh
So I went out catching oysters, and brought them home in pails.
When the oystercatchers next were out catching
I brought out my oyster pails. "Here! Oystercatchers! I cried;
Here are oysters to catch! Oystercatchers, Oh, oystercatchers;
You see how hard I've tried." The oystercatchers glanced my way, busy catching clams.

"We cannot catch caught oysters, you really ought to know.
Only oysters in the ocean will ever suit our plans."
So oyster stew was all I could do; watching oystercatchers wade away. and still-
I've never caught the sight I've sought so long;
An oystercatcher catching oysters. Is my longing then so wrong?

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Final score:

3points

Cosmikid

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To encourage the budding poets here- a non-original -

You're a Poet!
And don't know it!
But- your toes show it.
They're long fellows.

now go WRITE a poem..

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Final score:

2points

Cosmikid

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The wolves are howling
Your stomachs growling
the sky is red it's the end
you wake up screaming
You were only dreaming

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Final score:

2points

Magic Poodle (all but masc)

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There was a young man from Peru / Who was always playing with glue / Then one week / The glue suffered a leak / Now stuck to his head is a shoe.

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Final score:

2points

Penguin Panda Pop

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This one a competition for a short poem that would appeal to a lot of people:

PAY
DAY

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Final score:

2points

Apatheist Account2

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no, not an original. heard this decades ago, recited by redd foxx.

the dog's meeting


Oh, the dogs once held a meeting,
They came from near and far.
Oh, some they came by greyhound bus
while others came by car.

Before into the concert hall
They were allowed to look,
Each dog had to take his rear end off
And hang it on a hook.

hardly were they seated there,
Each mother, son and sire,
When some dirty doberman pincher
Began to holler 'Fire!'

Out they rushed, all in a bunch
they had no time to look
Each dog just grabbed a rear end
From off the nearest hook.

And that's the reason why you see,
On walking down the street,
Each dog will stop and swap a smell
With every dog he meets.

And that's the reason why a dog
Will leave a good fat bone
To stop and smell a rear
In hopes to find his own.

and, because i am a twisted individual, i used this poem for a test when i was learning american sign language. i figured if i got most of it correctly then the class would be laughing. it worked.

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Final score:

1point

talliloo

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Roses are red, violets are blue.
If you don't like my poem,
you can kiss my a$$ too.

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Final score:

0points

Robin Roper

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There once was very bored Panda
who sat on his lovely veranda.
He went really mad,
'cause the 'facts' that he read,
were all just right-wing propaganda.

OK, not funny ... but true. ;)

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Final score:

0points

Rizzo

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