First because most custody cases are solved by mututal agreement and not by court. In most cases men just dont want the custody or dont ask for it.

And second because sadly women are still doing the vast majority of childrearing and housechores, even if they work. The main custodian needs to be somebody who knows the kids allergies, doctor, teachers, friends... A friend of my mum was a judge who worked on custody agreements. She told me that she used to ask the parents questions about the kids like their shoe size, best friends name, teachers name, who goes to the school meetings. 99% of the time the mother knew and did all and the father did not. Obviously the custody then was given to the mother who was the one taking care of the children.

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Pisco

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Maybe because society is stuck with an old school mentality that women are to be at hoke raising kids.

I got two kids, I do all house chores, I work two jobs and take care of them %100 of the time. I will give my life for those kids.

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Carlos Moreno

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Melaniedawn Pressler

Melaniedawn Pressler

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2 years ago

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I agree society is stuck in the old school ways. My husband wants custody and can't get it. His ex has six kids, who missed 29 days of school, homeless, no job, and numerous CPS cases. We have his son most of the time. All summer long, every holiday, and whenever else his son calls. Yet they won't give him custody. Hopefully the lawyer he just got will help him get his.

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At my mother's custody hearing my father didn't show up so...that was pretty much that.

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Bittersweetie

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It’s not all, and it’s not fair, but some women will lie about the dad, sometimes. They want the kids and the child support, so they might say or do whatever to screw over a guy. Some women can be mean and vindictive for whatever reason. (As can men, it goes both ways.) Some situations happen between the parents, but it does not mean either parent is necessarily bad to the child(ren). Sadly, the kids are used as pawns. I don’t recall this being so bad years (decades?) ago, but it has seemed to increase some over time. It’s an unfortunate situation. Just one of the many reasons on the list. I get there are times when stuff can be true. I’m only referring to the times when it’s not true, and moms make up stuff to get the kids.

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V Martinez

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This is hard to generalize towards "most men". Some dads get 50/50 custody. Some dads get majority of the custody, or main custody with the mom allowed to have them at times, and vice versa with the dads. Some dads don't want to have custody, or revoke their parental rights, and that's vice versa with the moms.
Sometimes it's not even in the parents control due to abuse, neglect, etc.

Traditionally, moms get the upper hand because, in a traditional sense, it is thought since moms are the better caregivers, or more apt to wanting to be okay with being the main caregivers, and it was once thought that children are better off with their moms. Of course that is not entirely true, and it's a case by case issue.

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BadCat

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