Them: "I'm going to run to the store real quick"

Me: "Why dont you take the car, it's much faster than running"

OR

Them: "I'm going to jump in the shower"

Me: "That doesn't sound safe, maybe just step in like normal"

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Mer

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PineappleQueen

PineappleQueen

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3 years ago

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That’s what I think whenever someone says that

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How many people does it take to skrew in a lightbulb?

None. Its a LIGHT bulb!

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3points

Annabelle Phillips

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Denki/Shinkami

Denki/Shinkami

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3 years ago

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Noice :>

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I got you a Toyota! What, you're looking for the car? No, it's a TOY YODA.

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3points

Ariana Grande Artist

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pansexualandproud

pansexualandproud

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3 years ago

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that's what my mom named her car. we have a Toyota named Toy Yoda

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What kind of music do windmills like? They’re big metal fans.

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3points

Ian Bailey

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What do you call a hippie's wife? Mississippi.

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3points

Spaghetti

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I have a lot of jokes about unemployed people, but they don't work.

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3points

EnderGuardian

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Shelp

Shelp

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3 years ago

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This is dark

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I lost my job at the bank on my very first day. A woman asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over

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konner

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Have you heard the song Dynamite by BTS? Its kinda bomb :>

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Final score:

2points

Denki/The community crackhead

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Dooberman

Dooberman

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3 years ago

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javascript:void(0);javascript:void(0);https://www.boredpanda.com/author/peytonpollard/

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whenever someone asks me how my day was i say-
i had a sans-ational day today.
if you hadn't guessed i love undertale or more specifically sans and the sans aus.

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2points

Asy_End

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Aiyana Menrige

Aiyana Menrige

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3 years ago

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I want to get into it, but I only know two of them. Some wholesome guy named Blueberry (I think ) and some creepy guy named Ink ( Also I think )

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Dude 1: Want to hear a construction joke?

Dude 2: Sure!

Dude 1: Nvm, Im still working on it.

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Gay Gremlin

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We used to have one Security Operations Centre, but now there are two.
It's a pair of SOCs.

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HS

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My friend would tell me this one all the time, I think he forgets that I remember him telling it to me so I go along with it and pretend like I haven’t heard it to make him feel better lol

What do mermaids use to wash their hair

TiDe!

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PjandBolt

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i dont want to tell you because im not punny

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SCP-096

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Have you met the new Irish hairdresser?.... Tim O'Taye

How much does an Irish person pay for shampoo in London.... Pound-Ten

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Donkey boi

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