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Hey Pandas, What Are The Most Homophobic Or Transphobic Things A Family Member Has Said? (Closed)
Family is not always accepting, sadly. Most of my family doesn't know and the ones that do like to pretend that I'm straight. So share your examples of the worst things a family member has said in relation to this.
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#1
Here goes! So, I'm out to my family as transmasc and gay, and they're the kind of people who think that they're awesome allies because they once took me to a pride parade and they don't really think that all queer people should die. My dad is actually a great ally, but my mom is a very different matter.
When I came out and asked for a binder, it took months of arguing, in which her main arguments were 'I don't want you to fight your biology' 'it makes me sad' and 'it's basically the same as botox and you're gonna get plastic surgery on your face later in life'. So that s**t is completely twisted. Ofc, I am gonna get top and probably bottom surgery when I'm 18 cause 1) I don't give a f**k what she wants and 2) dysphoria f*****g sucks. I'm also gonna be going on HRT, which she would kill me for (she hates all 'body modifications' so she also wont be happy when i get tats and probably pierce my nose). Just a bit over four years left. Beyond that, she's also one of those people who complains about how hard using the right pronouns for me is and doesn't understand that it's a million times harder for me to live through this. She just isn't trying- I've been out for months and the most she does is loudly correct herself to 'they' and genderless nouns and wait for me to start thanking her and groveling at her feet for not even doing the bare minimum.
I know that I'm super lucky that I didn't get thrown out or physically abused after coming out but I can't help wishing that I had more.
Final score:
7points
Imperial Guard 1 year ago
In what world is a binder the same as physically and permanently altering your body? Sounds like your mother is pushing you to be like her ideal version of you. Sending love and support
RELATED:
#2
My mother telling me that I "just want to be special" when I came out as nonbinary because in her mind you cannot be both trans and not hetero
Final score:
6points
crowspectre 2.0 (he/they) 1 year ago
Haha she definitely wouldn't like meeting me. Sorry that you have to deal with that, sounds like she sucks
#3
"what are some trends at your school?" (hinting at people being gay)"is being gay or non-binary a trend? because people think they can just change their gender like their underwear"-my dad's brother. then he proceeds to tell me about his wife's cousin who is nonbinary and he used she/her pronouns even though he KNEW. my whole family, especially my dad's side, has always been a bit homophobic. my mom's side is a little better, especially since my mom's brother is gay. but i don't really feel safe. i'm just glad i can feel safe most of the time around them.
Final score:
5points
crowspectre 2.0 (he/they) 1 year ago
UGH SAME. this always sucks like... how can one think a trans person has a choice? It's such a s****y deal. My mom does a similar thing, she'll bring up other trans people and purposefully use the wrong pronouns for them and idk why (a bit ago she was tlakimg about my godmothers sisters kid and was like 'yeah her niece uses they them pronouns and wants to change her name' like dude.
#4
not technically a family member, as my family is very supportive! But my best friend. I still absolutely love her to bits and we're still best friends, we just don't really talk about this. She said she didn't "technically" support me being bi, but in her words "I don't give a s**t what other people do with their lives". She has the same views with trans people.
Final score:
5points
Ashen Brooks (They/Them) 1 year ago
well, that is better than getting negatively involved in peoples lives.
#5
Not my family, but I go to a catholic high school, when our varsity girls soccer team was playing in districts I would go to all the games I could. Now, these games were in late November early December at 6:30 at night, so it got to low 40s mid 30s (degrees in Fahrenheit.) I would bring a big puffy rainbow blanket to help keep warm. At one of these games my blanket was rather annoying to a dad FROM THE OTHER TEAM. Our convo went something like this:
Him: You know, a rainbow blanket makes you look rather gay. You’ll never get a boyfriend like that.
Me: Oh that’s not a problem. See, I am gay.
Him: And you go to this school?
Me: Yes.
Him: This Catholic School?
Me: Yes.
Him: And no one has a problem with that?
Me: Respectfully, as far as I know, you are the only one that does.
He then began to mumble a bunch of homophobic things under his breath and talking about how “kids these days, doing the devil’s work to be popular.” So I had a bunch of other girls come and share the big gay blanket with me to annoy him. Did I mention he was in our student section. If he didn’t want to deal with snarky teens, don’t sit in a student section.
Final score:
4points
Ashen Brooks (They/Them) 1 year ago
B******t, I believe in religion, I just don't believe in all of it, the reason I am not a member of our church.
#6
Not a family member, but a girl I had been chatting with for a few hours:
"I don't understand those people. When we die and archaeologists dig us up, they're just going to find our skeletons. Boys are boys and girls are girls, you can't just change it."
Needless to say, I noped the f*ck out of there ASAP.
Final score:
2points
crowspectre (he/they) 1 year ago
God I've met that type of person and they suck. Idk if they understand that I give zero f***s what pronouns someone uses for my long-dead skeleton, I as a human being with a mind and sentience, am a guy. I don't care what happens after I'm dead, but it isn't hard to respect someone in their life
#7
"You go, girl. Boy. They. It. Thing. Whatever you are."
From my mom. For reference, I'm trans and have been out and proud for 2 years. It should be better by now.
Final score:
2points
and_a_touch_of_the_’tism 1 year ago (edited)
Ah yes, the eternal scourge of ‘IT.’ I hope a bull inseminates her left nostril (shoutout to Nathaniel for the insult).
#8
"I'm not homophobic because phobic means scared of and I'm not scared of them I just don't like them."
Bro...
Phobia is scared
Phobic is not like
GET IT RIGHT DAD
Final score:
2points
Ashen Brooks (They/Them) 1 year ago
phobic: having or involving an extreme aversion to something. (From: the English dictionary) aversion: a strong dislike or disinclination. (From: The English dictionary)
What do you think ?
and_a_touch_of_the_’tism 1 year ago
My family is pretty great and supportive, although recently my mom, without warning or consulting me, told my OB-GYN that I was asking about binding. The doctor just game me a Look and said in the most passive-aggressive voice, “why would you want to do that?” Yeah I’m still salty. NOT COOL MOM.
and_a_touch_of_the_’tism 1 year ago
My family is pretty great and supportive, although recently my mom, without warning or consulting me, told my OB-GYN that I was asking about binding. The doctor just game me a Look and said in the most passive-aggressive voice, “why would you want to do that?” Yeah I’m still salty. NOT COOL MOM.
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