"if life gives you lemons, rob the tree for some limes too."
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You always remember to not put aluminum foil in the microwave. You never remember to not put freshly microwaved 3000 degree pizza rolls in your mouth.
"Curiosity killed the cat" my mother used to tell me
"But satisfaction brought it back" I always shot back.
I also say, "It is what it is" quite a bit.
“I wouldn’t pi$$ in her a$$ if her guts were on fire.” This gem came from my late MIL. It’s just one of many. I miss her so much.
When a customer clicks to get my attention I tell him it takes more than two fingers to make me cum