There is this guy that goes to school with me and I need ways to roast him.

#1

I'd love a battle of wits with you, unfortunately you are unarmed.

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#2

If wit were s**t, you'd be constipated.

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#3

Yo momma so old, her last name is “asaurus” - from a Key&Peele sketch

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#4

You haven't really embraced intelligence for yourself, have you?

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#5

"If I had a dollar for every one of your brain cells, I'd be in debt."

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#6

As much use as a chocolate kettle.

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#7

You're Mother used to say that God doesn't make mistakes. But when she looked at you, she changed her mind.

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#9

Tri-tip, bottom round rump, chuck, eye of round, top round, sirloin tip. These seem to be the best

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#10

"You are the problem to my solution just as me to your last braincell"

Ik it's weird don't judge lol I still remember this from elementary school

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#11

The problem isn't that obesity runs in ur family, it's that no one runs in ur family

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