The title explains it all, I need a laugh.

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#1

Dad found out on Christmas Eve his Great Aunt was going to be alone on Christmas day. She was in her late 80's and her close family had either passed away or had other plans that day. Dad jumped in his car and drove 2 hours to pick her up. Being last minute - my parents realized we didn't have a gift for her. Dad then remembered he had brought home a box of chocolates from a business trip to Europe that were given to him by a client. Little did he know they had alcohol in them. My 88 year old Baptist Great Great Aunt ate half the box on Christmas day, complimented the "syrup" in the center of the chocolates, proceeded to giggle, tell funny stories, and crack jokes for about an hour and half, then passed out for the rest of the day. After she passed out Dad realized his mistake and stated, "We won't tell her". Despite her headache the next day she claimed it was one of her best Christmas ever.

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Justin Jones
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Lorraine R
Lorraine R
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is a wonderful story, and I'm so glad the the younger members of the family will have happy memories of a great-aunt who they otherwise wouldn't have known at all.

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#2

My friend was holding all our stuff (a flag, a violin, a trombone, a wooden rifle, 3 backpacks) and we were walking to the bathroom bc she had to go and she tripped in a hole, she fell onto everything and peed her pants a little bit. We will never let her forget it.

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Alex (she/they)
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Black Pearl
Black Pearl
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Why was this downvoted? Y'all have to stop downvoting things for no reason. That will get people banned. You should only be downvoting people who deserve it, not people like this. There wasn't even a reason to downvote this one! It's funny and it fits the prompt!

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#3

Alone in my apartment I lost my cellphone. To find it, I called myself using my landline. It took three tries, but I finally I found my phone. Ten minutes later, I saw three missed calls.
I dialed the number... and my landline rings. I pick up. I heard a faint rustle (it was my own phone).
Short story, then proceed to yell to myself for wasting everyone's time with prank calls. Couple of seconds later, my brain caught up... I felt it was something Mr. Bean would do....

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Luis Hernandez Dauajare
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Lavendeer 201
Lavendeer 201
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

LOL reminds me of when you're looking for your glasses but you're wearing them

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#4

I was practicing guitar at some lake near my university on a warm summer evening, not a single person was there, and i was about to go home after i finished my practice. I told myself "ok ill do one more song " so thats what i did.

And during that song is when i saw a guy from the distance heading towards me . he had a blanket wrapped around him (which i didnt really question cuz its a bigger city where i studied and there is a lot of interesting people there). He sat down like 3 meters away from me and listened to me play my song and sing. I could tell immediately that sth was going on with him and that he was going through sth, so after the song was finished i asked him " hey , everything alright mate? " . and he answered with phrases like " idk , i just need love man ."

so i decided to play some more songs for him to cheer him up and it actually worked, which i was happy to see. we kept talking about random stuff and at one point he touched my shoulder with his hand as a sign of gratitude. right after that he laughed his a*s off for like a minute, and when he was done laughing i asked him why cuz i was confused.

he answered with this : " this whole time, i thought you are a halucination of mine. right now im tripping balls on mushrooms, i was actually tripping with my friend but i lost him somewhere and i tried to find him. " then i also got lost and i saw monsters and demons everywhere (it was already dark outside at that time) and my trip turned into a nightmare, but then from a far distance i could hear this innocent, pure and positive music , it felt like this was my only way out of this so i followed the music and i saw you there. i did not expect it to be real i honestly thought it was my subconsiousness.

after i reassured him that i was definetly a real person , now we both laughed about it together and i got in contact with him afterwards.

he offered me to trip with him together some day as a sign of being thankful for saving his trip, and i agreed and one day we actually did it , and it was one of the most important experiences i had in my entire life.

all of this because i decided to play one last song at that lake before leaving hahah.

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#5

Walknig out of a doc's office. I didn't have full leg function back yet. My leg "quit". Down I went, while holding a takeaway cup. Somehow, I landed on my butt, and the first person to me didn't ask "How are you?" but "Oh my God! You didn't even spill your coffee!" And I was left sitting there like, "Um... I'm fine? Thanks?"

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Leo Domitrix
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Yeah, okay.
Yeah, okay.
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

To be fair, did it happen to me I would have said the same thing myself, starting on wonder at the unspilled cup!

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#6

In my AP Human Geography class last year someone threw someone else's shoe on a shelf. The guy went to get his shoe by standing on a chair and inning the rest of the way up the shelf. Well, it didn't work out and he fell off the shelf without his shoe (it was a short distance). The best part was that he had been standing on a chair with wheels so when he fell the chair launched across the room. It happened right next to my table and we couldn't stop laughing.

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Black Pearl
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girlsrock4ever
girlsrock4ever
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Someone downvoted you so I upvoted you again. PSA: Downvoting gets people BANNED. If you don't like it, say so respectfully. Only downvote if it's spam or racist/sexist/homophobic/etc.

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#7

The hubby and I were visiting a friend one evening. She had a fish tank with one tiny fish in it that had killed every other fish. As a result, she had decided that she was done having fish and had started offloading some of her unnecessary supplies to others while caring for the fish and waiting for it to eventually pass naturally of old age. We have a tank, and so she offered us the fish. We gladly accepted. Then she realized that one of the supplies she had already gifted away was her net. How were we going to get the fish out of the tank now? The hubby figured that he may have a chance at actually catching the fish in his hand. Power to him, have at it. I have seen him do it before. I sat a couple feet away holding a ziplock bag of water in the event that he was successful. After a few failed attempts, our friend comes out with a coffee mug to try and scoop out the fish. No sooner than the mug hit the water, the fish jumped out of the tank and dove right into the ziplock bag of water I had been holding! Nothing but net! It was so unbelievable that we just stared at eachother in disbelief before bursting out into uncontrollable laughter. All the while, checking the bag several times, questioning and making certain that it really did in fact happen. There was the fish... in the bag... like he wanted to come home with us. It was meant to be. We laughed for such a long time, hours it felt like. That was the best laugh any of us has ever had. The entire scenario was so bizarre. If only someone had filmed it. It was such a crazy set of circumstances to occur that I wouldn't have believed it had I not been there. We still laugh about it years later. If you are curious, we named it Jumper.

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Stephanie Goadsby
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I'm Kid A
I'm Kid A
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Not sure why, but this one in particular cracked me up. One of those one-in-a-million I-guess-the-animals-are-smarter-than-we-think situations. I'm guessing the genius little guy was scoping out the bag as a potential get away vehicle to escape the coffee cup. Saw his opportunity and took it.

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#8

i once got my head stuck in my sweatshirt.. need i say more

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Em the avocado!
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#9

Okay, have a little fun at my expense. At the elementary school, we had those dressing rooms (for storing shoes & coats) which look like prison cells secured by padlocks. One day, I had to leave early, so I asked the girl who was in charge of the keys to the dressing room. She unlocked the padlock and asked me to lock it again once I leave. Then she left. I grabbed my stuff and then I had the greatest brain fart which caused me to lock the room BEFORE I left the dressing room. I basically locked myself there, had to wait until someone came by and ask them to bring the key girl again. Several people came to see my self-imposed incarceration.

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Luke Branwen
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#10

I ran away from home at age 16. No money, no car no phone. I managed to make it to the interstate highway after walking for hours. I didn't plan this out as I didn't even have a sack of personal belongings. A couple more hours of walking and a biker on a huge hog pulls up behind me. He asked me what in the world I'm doing and I tell him. He then says hop on!

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DV Zara and Headless lesbos
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#11

Oops, continued! So I hop on the back and my little kid arms wrap around his huge belly. What a sight for everyone on the highway and then when we arrive back to my house, my brother's met my new friend.

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DV Zara and Headless lesbos
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#12

Well, there was that one Thanksgiving when my grandpa tried to take a sip from his wine glass but sort of missed the mark and ended up smashing it on his forehead...

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Veronica Rabbit
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#13

I have boy/girl twins. When I was changing my sons diaper one day his sister crawled right up, whacked his little W***y, and crawled back to her toys!! I froze in disbelief for a few seconds wishing someone else had witnessed it then busted out laughing!!

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JustinTime
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#14

I used to unload trucks for a large retailer. Most of it was by hand. So, I was unloading a truck full of toys (it was christmas prep time) and I hit an unstable wall, which proceeded to collapse on me. The boxes were kind of heavy...

Because the boxes were full of Jenga sets.

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Trick Question
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#15

I bike fairly often, I'll just ask my parents to go out on a bike ride (than subsequently bike for twenty minutes, go to my grandparents', talk with them and have a coke and bike hom). So my neighbors had a truck parked at the end of our driveway (totally cool, they're a big family and have friends and family over often). I was looking the other direction when I turned off my driveway and straight-up BODYSLAMMED this MONSTROUS pickup truck. The mom across the street was about to leave in her car, and immediately is out of the car going, "Oh my gosh, are you okay, are you hurt?". I did not check if I was bleeding. I did not check if my bike was broken. I immediately, no hesitation, launched to my feet and began meticulously inspecting the taillight area of the pickup for damage, because I knew, I WOULD HAVE TO PAY, and I was FREAKING out. The best part was that the mom kept asking if I was okay, and I kept going "I'm fine, does the truck look damaged to you??"

And while I wasn't bleeding, I did have some PRETTY severe bruises on my ribs.

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Zoe Stanley
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Zoe Stanley (Submission author)
Zoe Stanley
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Forgot to add -- twenty minutes later, despite the pain, I was enjoying my coke at my grandparents'.

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#16

I had been watching way too much 5-minute-crafts and I thought that I could make pants into a shirt without having to cut them. Long story short, I couldn’t. I got very stuck in them. It was the second time I had gotten my upper body stuck in pants. I did manage to make a nice once I picked up the scissors, though.

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green penguin / isabelle
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Tabitha Frost
Tabitha Frost
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

How did you get stuck the first time? XD And ngl, this sounds exactly like something I would do.

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#17

This just happened the other day and is 100% true. I wish I had had a camera. Firstly, know that there is a gap in my home's foundation skirt where I suspect an animal has been living.

So I go outside to walk my dog. I'm in the driveway, and I look down and there's my dog. I look left, and there's my cat. I look further left and there's a freaking raccoon, standing there on his feet, like he's part of our group. LOL.

We stared at each other for a moment or two, while I'm thinking, What should I do? I am ashamed to admit that I looked away first, so I guess that means that he dominated me.

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NatalieC
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#18

So my friend and I were playing the Town map on Call of Duty: Black ops 2 and she throws a Molotov at the zombies but my dumb butt yells "Mazel tov!!!" instead which is a jewish celebration not a bottle of alcohol on fire. And so now it's an on going joke a decade later. I don't think I'm ever going to live it down.

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Kira Eggert
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Kira Eggert (Submission author)
Kira Eggert
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1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'd like to mention that my husband got to hear of said event multiple times from my friend when we first got together because she finds it hilarious to this day. She even made a post about it on Facebook to my embarrassment so family and friends could hear.

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#19

This was almost 30 years ago.. could have been grade 4 or 5. Me and my bestie had a habit to lean our chairs against the desk behind us, pretty much balancing on the back legs of the chair, but the desk would keep us vertically.
So on this day, the girls who were usually sitting behind us weren't at school, so the desk had nothing to stop it from moving from our weight. Me not realising how physics work, decided to do my leaning chair thing.... It was all good for a minute or so, then the desk slid away from me and I went backwards with a loud noise.
Still to this day I don't understand how my friend didn't hear or see me "go" and in exactly the same time as I went down, she decided to lean back as well, but there was nothing to hold her up, so while everyone is looking and laughing at me on the ground, my friend goes down too.
We sheepishly got up and sat down, couldn't stop laughing until the end of class.
Still, when I remember that day or tell the story, I just start laughing.

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Sanita Pike
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#20

Once when I was a kid, my brother literally said, "Sodium is what makes soda carbondyhydrated, right?" I laughed my a*s off at that.

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AtlastheTrashPanda
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#21

oops, i accidentally posted my story twice, oh welll.

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#22

I was in school and we all sat at tables, not singular desks. I sat next to this guy and we were learning about figurative language when he raises his hand. MY teacher calls on him and he asks to go to the nurse. SHe asks why and his response was "My eyebrow is falling off." EVERYONE burst into fits of laughter including the teacher and he just repeats "I swear, it's falling off!" while clutching his eyebrow. Me and my friends still talk about it to this day

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ChocolateCake
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#23

Once tapped my sibling saying in a squeaky voice, "POKER!" then ran away. Went completely sideways on the bend on the wet sidewalk and fell down. They saw that.

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idkwhatilike
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#24

I have a class at school where we film and edit the school news and I am an editor and a friend of all the editors. One friend kept saying they the only guy editor and me fight like a married couple. The other friend agreed but me and the guy editor just shook our heads and denied.

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Slothgirl8000
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#25

I was once in a friend's basement aroom in a shared house that had a door that lead out to the parking lot. It was a warm summer evening and I opened the door and left it partially open for several hours. After imbibing in alcohol I noticed funny sounds coming from the washer/dryer area. I went to investigate and found a juvenile Opossum (a Virgina Possum) hanging out. The Opossum would not be shoed out the door and I didn't want to pick it up incase it bit me. After spending a very drunk 30 minutes trying to get it out I gave up. My friend and I went upstairs to the shared living room in the house and slept there for the night. In the morning I found the Opossum sleeping and picked it up with a towel by its tail and tossed it out the door. The animal landed on its feet and looked back as if to say "I had a fun time, let's do it again!" and walked off.

The reason my friend was not able to help is they are legally blind and I was drink as a skunk.

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Nonbinary Reptile
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Huddo's sister
Huddo's sister
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This reminds me of one time when my brother was drunk. We had a house party and he had passed out at about 10pm. At about 6am he wakes up, still drunk, and starts talking to our cat. The cat began meowing and my brother was talking back to it. So myself, and others who had stayed overnight, woke up to my brother saying over and over something like 'I want to feed you, but I don't know where your food is'. It was very annoying at the time, but when we all went back to sleep and woke up later, it was quite funny.

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#26

just today even,i slid out of my chair in history class and landed straight on my backpack.then i just kept reading my book for SSR.

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Cursed Starscream
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#27

I was practicing guitar at some lake near my university on a warm summer evening, not a single person was there, and i was about to go home after i finished my practice. I told myself "ok ill do one more song " so thats what i did.

And during that song is when i saw a guy from the distance heading towards me . he had a blanket wrapped around him (which i didnt really question cuz its a bigger city where i studied and there is a lot of interesting people there). He sat down like 3 meters away from me and listened to me play my song and sing. I could tell immediately that sth was going on with him and that he was going through sth, so after the song was finished i asked him " hey , everything alright mate? " . and he answered with phrases like " idk , i just need love man ."

so i decided to play some more songs for him to cheer him up and it actually worked, which i was happy to see. we kept talking about random stuff and at one point he touched my shoulder with his hand as a sign of gratitude. right after that he laughed his a*s off for like a minute, and when he was done laughing i asked him why cuz i was confused.

he answered with this : " this whole time, i thought you are a halucination of mine. right now im tripping balls on mushrooms, i was actually tripping with my friend but i lost him somewhere and i tried to find him. " then i also got lost and i saw monsters and demons everywhere (it was already dark outside at that time) and my trip turned into a nightmare, but then from a far distance i could hear this innocent, pure and positive music , it felt like this was my only way out of this so i followed the music and i saw you there. i did not expect it to be real i honestly thought it was my subconsiousness.

all of this because i decided to play one last song at that lake before leaving hahah.

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#28

Every time someone does something in my typing class (which my whole grade is in) does something and then everyone says they’re name in a disappointed voice

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Djtp09
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bElLa sTairZz
bElLa sTairZz
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

what do people even do in a typing class? it sounds really strange to me

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#29

There was this guy I knew that had a firm belief about not dating in middle school. Later, I heard him talking to another girl about his ex.(in middle school). Let's keep in mind that this dude is incredibly annoying and a generally awful person. A week after breaking up with him, the girl came out as lesbian.

Coincidence?

I think not.

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AAABattery218
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