I love jokes, so tell me yours!

Normal jokes, not anything that could hurt someone's feelings, please.

This post may include affiliate links.

#1

What do you call a pig that can do karate? Pork chop. Heres another one. Why did the kid throwed the clock? To see time flies

Report

Final score:
4points
Random_player
Add photo comments
POST
View more commentsArrow down menu
#2

⚠️ dad joke incoming ⚠️ What do you call a fish wearing a bowtie? So-fish-ticated.

Report

Final score:
3points
Micah Chips 🇺🇦🇮🇱
Add photo comments
POST
#3

What is the difference between autumn and fall? Humpty Dumpty never had a great autumn.

Report

Final score:
3points
Lidpras
Add photo comments
POST
#4

Here is one from me:

What do you call someone with no body and no nose? Nobody knows!

Report

Final score:
3points
eve
Add photo comments
POST
marianjessicavillanueva avatar
Doggo bunno
Doggo bunno
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Hahaahahhahahahaha!! HULPP MEEEEHH IM DYING OF LAUGHTER HAHAHHBABAABABAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Vote comment up
3
3points
Vote comment down
reply
View More Replies... View more commentsArrow down menu
#5

Two guys walked into a bar. The third guy ducked 😂

Report

Final score:
3points
Lexi
Add photo comments
POST
eve_3 avatar
eve
eve
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Okay...maybe I am stupid but I don't get it 😅 someone help, please? 🙈

Vote comment up
1
1point
Vote comment down
reply
View More Replies... View more commentsArrow down menu
ADVERTISEMENT
#6

What do people in the middle east call their cheese?
Cheeses of Nazareth

Report

Final score:
3points
Stew
Add photo comments
POST
#7

What do you get when Al Gore plays the drums?

An algorithm.

Report

Final score:
2points
Elizabeth B
Add photo comments
POST
View more commentsArrow down menu
#8

So there's three couples at the pearly gates trying to get in to heaven. St. Peter tells them their fates are dependant on how the husband behaved. St. Peter turns to first couple and says to the husband "You loved money so much you married a woman named Penny! Take the door to hell!”
He turns to the second couple and says "You loved alcohol so much that you married a woman named Brandy. Take the door to hell!"
He turns the third couple who are already heading the door marked hell. Saint Peter says "Don't you want me to read your decision?"
The third guy says "No I know where this is going." He turns to his wife and says "Come on F***y!"

Report

Final score:
2points
Who Panda 420
Add photo comments
POST
krisdargan avatar
Who Panda 420 (Submission author)
Who Panda 420
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wow they edited out the third woman's name which kind of makes the joke not that funny. But her name was F*a*n*n*y

Vote comment up
1
1point
Vote comment down
reply
View More Replies... View more commentsArrow down menu
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT
See Also on Bored Panda
#9

Another green joke:

It's green and gliding down a mountain: Skiwi

Report

Final score:
1point
MetaMaxNL
Add photo comments
POST
#10

Daredevil walked into a bar, and a chair, and a table

Report

Final score:
0points
Atchaco-Leigh
Add photo comments
POST
#11

What's green and has wheels?

Grass. I lied about the wheels.

Report

Final score:
-1point
Rylee Evergreen (bye loves!)
Add photo comments
POST
eve_3 avatar
eve
eve
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

😂😂😂 green reminds me of this joke: what is green and hurts when you get it into your eye? A pool table! 😂😂😂

Vote comment up
0
0points
Vote comment down
reply
View more commentsArrow down menu

Anyone can write on Bored Panda. Start writing!

Follow Bored Panda on Google News!