hehe dark humor and weird humor is awesomeee

#1

Why couldn't the robber break into the weed dispensary? It was a high security facility.

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    #2

    What’s six inches long has white stuff on it and you spot after it’s in your mouth and feels better when it vibrates? A toothbrush duhh

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    #3

    Homie 1: Never lose hope, bro. Because we are not losers.

    Homie 2: Then what are we, huh?

    Homie 1: Worse than that.

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    #4

    Alright, I’ve told this one a few times on here, and lots of times irl, but let’s see if you guys remember. This is a dark/dirty joke. So, a man finds out that his wife is cheating on him with his best friend. So he hires a hitman to shoot his wife in the head, and his best friend in the family jewels. The hitman says he charges $100 per bullet. The man agrees. Once they set up, the hitman looks through the scope and says “I can save you $100”

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    #5

    How many cops does it take to change a light bulb? They don't. They arrest the bulb for being broke and beat the room for being black.

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    #6

    whats house plus house plus plane......homicide

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    #7

    There was an ant and there was a grasshopper. The ant was collecting acorns for the winter, and being really annoying about it too. He kept saying things like 'Theres no way Im gonna starve this winter.' and 'Im gonna survive this winter even if I have to collect every acorn in the forest'.

    Well the grasshopper heard enough and clearly being annoyed started to yell at the ant. 'Hey! You know whats gonna happen to me this winter? Im gonna lay some eggs, then Im gonna die because Im a grasshopper and thats what we do! And you are an ant! Ants dont even eat acorns! What are you retardid?' And the ant was.

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    #8

    How do you fit four gay men on one stool? Turn the stool upside down.

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