Hey Pandas, Post Your Biggest Problem Here And I Will Give You Unsolicited Advice (Closed)
Not a therapist - no guarantees how helpful this will be - but why not?
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I broke my phone screen and my mom doesn't know yet :/
Uh oh, does it still work? I've thought I broken mine before but it was just the screen protector, which j could replace. First, check if it's the screen protector, then if it's really a big crack on the screen apologize to your parents.
How should I ask out my crush who is also my best friend?
im going to jump of a bridge and nobody will catch me
Don't do it, we truly care about you, and the world would be sadder withought you. Think of the things that bring you some joy, and think of all the people who would be sad to see you go. I am sure that I can speak on behalf of all the other people here, when I say that we truly and deeply wish that you would take a minute and decide not to jump. I also want to thank you for helping me and all the other pandas. So please don't do it, because we care
Trying to stop bingeing
Hi! I have an ED, anorexia, and had a few problems with bingeing. I don't know if you restrict, and if so, I know you must be sick of people saying 'restricting makes you binge,' but in my experience, I genuinely stopped my 'binges' and even my excessive snacking when I started eating more during recovery. The other thing that might be helpful is temporarily ignoring weight, ignoring insecurities (hard, I know, I struggled during all-in) and try to eat large, satisfying quantities without a binge. It WILL be hard, I know. And you will fail again and again. But if you can find a way to eat food, and to be full, and to enjoy everything you consume, and then stop yourself from continuing to eat, you will be on the journey to recovery. Good luck! <3
My biggest problem is having a conversation with my parents. I always get super nervous. Help!
Me too. I find it easier to write down my thoughts because I can go over it many times so I don't muck it up. I am currently getting the courage to give my parents one telling them about my depression and suicidal thoughts in the past. We can get through it together!
I'm almost addicted to screens and I'm on so much social media and online things that would make my parents freak but I feel dependent on my online friends and the things that make me happy...
It can be hard to tear yourself away from screens, so don't force it. If I were you, I would first start thinking about the thinks that make you happy that don't involve screens. Maybe make a list. Once you have found some things you are genuinely excited to do, I would start to put little limits on your screen time. Say, 'I will turn all my devices off by midnight'. 'I will turn them all off at 11' 'shutting down at '10:30'. Feel free to use incentives/reward yourself. I would also recommend asking yourself when you use technology, is this the best use of my time? Do I really NEED to do this? And you know what - it's okay if the answer is yes, and you think, yes, this is fun, I want to use my time this way. Then do it!! You don't have to eliminate technology - you just need to be able to not depend on it. You might try is creating situations where you cannot access tech for a bit, if you are up for it. Like camping, no wifi, hiking, setting phone time limits. Good luck! :)
I’m in the closet and have a crush on my best friend and don’t know how to tell him.
Well depends on their personality like i saw a meme like with the glowing brains and the last frame was 'coming out with this meme' and u could send that and explain, but again depends on personality
I recently confessed to my crush, who was also my best friend, and they replied that they were uncomfortable and didn’t know if they still wanted to be my friend. 😔 Right now, I’m giving them space. Should I completely ignore them forever or?
Don't ignore them forever because if they are a best friend, they wouldn't want you to ignore them. I would give them some space, but not too much for a while, and then see what happens
I dont know what gender I am, I was born a girl, but I don't feel like a girl all the time. I want to be a boy, but not all the time because being a girl is cool too, and sometimes i feel like i'm neither, but i don't feel like im nonbinary either. I thought I was genderfluid but I've seen that it doesn't fit after using that label for a while. I've tried bigender, demigirl/demiboy, non-binary, right now I just use the label "genderqueer" but having a more specific label makes me feel more secure in my gender, but I don't know what it is, anyone able to give me suggestions on what to do to figure it out?
I'm not able to tell you who you are. But I do know this - labels are always going to be tough, and it may take a while to find one that really fits you, or perhaps you will find that labels are too limiting to encompass your identity. It is perfectly okay (although frustrating, I know) to not have everything figured out now. An option for you might be to go by 'gender questioning' for a while, but I know that some people don't like that because it implies that they don't know who they are when they really do, and just don't have a term for it. Also, keep on researching and trying things out! You might consider investigating bigender and nonbinary - parallel terms like agender, pangender, and trigender. Or hey, this may be a little out there, but you could make up a new word for who you are! Also, keep on talking to people about their gender discovery experiences. Good luck :) I'm sure you will find a way to describe yourself and that this journey will lead you to a place of happiness
After changing your profile, when you try to comment something, it says "In order to comment, your profile must be approved by Bored Staff." How do you fix it? Sometimes it also says "You are posting comments too quickly. Slow down," so how do you fix that?
My parents are homophobes and transphobes. Im moving out and want to start to transition. But I want to stay in contact with my sibblings. Im not sure how long I can keep is a secret
I am so sorry about your parents. I guess if I were you, my course of action would depend on whether the siblings shared the same beliefs as your parents. If you think your siblings would be supportive, I think it would be a good idea to tell them and ask them not to share with your parents (if you aren't ready to tell your parents yet.) On the other hand, if you wanted to tell your parents and get it over with, I'd say you have two options. If you feel like telling your parents in person would be physically or emotionally unsafe, I would right them a note/letter that they would recieve after you left home. Or, if you would rather, tell them in person. And just know that just because they react badly now doesn't mean they will never accept you. I have lesbian moms (yes, different from trans, but still LGBTQ+) and through them, I know a lot of middle aged lesbian couples. Many had unaccepting families who gradually adjusted and now they are really close! Good luck! <3
So-
I’m transgender (FtM) but I made a terrible decision and told my mum I was lesbian last June... haha, couldn’t have been more wrong.
A few months ago, I believe it was in December, she found out. And - long story short, she thinks I’m just confused and all that bullshit.
Another reason she doesn’t believe me is because I asked for a dress in November (really? - that seems somewhat sexist) (a word of advice; if you’re transgender, do not try and force yourself to be more ‘feminine’
I genuinely don’t know how long I can go being misgendered and called my birth name.
Elmo: Ok, for your mom, she gets it but she doesn't want to believe it. If she tells you that you are wrong, ignore her. You are who you are and you can make yourown decisions. Keep going and don't let her stop you.
I cannot get anyone to listen to me. And people end up doing either the opposite of what I ask, or not at all. And they complain I don’t ask for help. It’s family, and it’s all killing me slowly. (55 so not everyone here is that young - you would think I would have it all sorted out. There is just so much I need to talk to anyone about)