I have anxiety and I don’t know how to deal with it. If you could be so kind as to help, I would very much appreciate it.

#1

If my anxiety is based on having too many things to do, I just write them all out. In my head, it always seems way more complex and difficult compared to actually seeing a to-do list and crossing things off one-by-one.

If I just feel anxious for no clear reason, I try to go and meet a friend or just let someone know how I'm feeling. Talking about it helps because once again when you say things out loud, they usually don't seem as dramatic as in your head. I know if I just sit alone and think about it, it will only get worse.

In general, just be gentle with yourself. Everything eventually passes!

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Mary Rose Kent
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It’s fantastic that you’re able to take such good emotional care of yourself! I find a nice long hot steamy bath helps in every possible situation.

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    #2

    I used to pick at my face till it bled when nervous, but recently I'm putting that energy into drawings. They give my hands something constructive to do

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    Mary Rose Kent
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I’m a nail biter of long standing. I guess I shouldn’t have been surprised that when I moved away from home and my multiply abusive stepfather, I stopped biting my nails. However, I was never became able to cope with having nails longer than the ends of my fingers, so now I just bite them for the pleasure of making them shorter.

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    #3

    I'm GenX, we don't get anxiety. We were trained to be dead inside.

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    #4

    I have been trying psycho-therapy after realizing that I was enjoying anti-anxiety meds a little too much. Initially, the breathing techniques worked, but now they don't anymore. Trying to read or watch something doesn't really work, because I'm a compulsive worrier!
    Sometimes I wake up from sleep as well in cold sweats and a pounding heart, without any unpleasant dreams. When that happens, I try to make a list of incidents and interactions that may be causing my anxiety attack. Next, I make two categories - 'things I can do to help this situation, and 'things that are out of my control'. My very prudent psychological counsellor taught me this trick. Once I see that worrying is only keeping me awake and making me feel sick, and not doing anything to address a particular problem, I begin to feel a little better. It's a small reminder that not everything that happens to you is your fault. You cannot control how people think or react. Misbehaviour from others and gossips about you don't reflect poorly on you but on the people engaging in it.
    Once I remind myself that I automatically find my breathing relaxing.
    I hope this helps someone.

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    #5

    I've been working with anxiety for years now. During an anxiety attack, try this technique. Name everything you see, hear, smell, taste, feel, etc. This is called grounding and will help to calm you down. It really works give it a go

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    Lsai Aeon
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I found this not long ago. It doesn't work for my son, but does for others. I've added that items cannot be named twice. IE you can either see or smell the flower but not both in this listing. Get your brain working on different things. Helpful-61...52a4e8.jpg Helpful-6189b6e52a4e8.jpg

    #6

    Blasting my music in my earbuds and zoning out. It just distracts me from my anxious thoughts and the real world.

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    #7

    Medication

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    Viviane
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm on anti-depressants which also alleviate anxiety. Still get it, but not as bad.

    #8

    This is probably much more personal and of no use to others. This is regards to my son's anxiety, which is usually at the max when we are around a lot of people. If we are shopping, at festivals or things like that, or even at holiday gatherings and he starts to get anxious, he will focus on his sister. Like push the cart in stores, pull her in a wagon in parks, play on the slides at parks, or play games with her during holiday gatherings. She feeds of his energy and usually gets anxious as well, though not as visually as his (she shuts the world out), so when he really concentrates on keeping her calm it helps him relax as well. He puts himself in a protector position and says it helps him feel brave.

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    ALEXIS CISNEROS
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    thats actually very sweet, but what happens in the long run if he becomes dependent on her? He should find more options as they get older so he isn't co-dependent

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    #9

    When you have anxiety attacks or just really strong bouts of it, take ten deep breaths. Inhale for four seconds, hold for four seconds, exhale for four, hold for four. The deep breaths help to calm you and the counting helps your brain to focus on something other than anxiety. Once you're done with that, go do something other than whatever triggered the attack. Read a few chapters of a book, take a walk, something you enjoy.

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    #10

    I get on the couch with my pups or go out in the backyard with the pups. Either way, my anxiety is reduced to irrelevant.

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    #11

    My Anxiety is kind of a rainbow of things.
    1. New things are frightening - gaining experience, doing baby steps, and research really helps.
    2. Dealing with a task I have experience with, but it's a big deal. Like a monthly project. Doing it bit by bit helps so it's not one giant lump thing to worry over.

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    #12

    Alone time and silence to decompress. Painting

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    #13

    Ok won't work for everyone but I use creative outlets. A lot of times it's just like I have a ton pent up in me so I use color and sounds to let it out. For example I play six or seven instruments and I play different ones depending on my mood. I also love to custom paint things like shoes and hats that I can wear later. Learning how to do these things began as a coping mechanism and now that I'm good they remain as an outlet.

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    #14

    I used to spit it all out to school counselors but then they all betray me.
    Now I just try to avoid the chanting no matter how unpopular I become.

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    Eckho
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I don't think this is the greatest way to cope with anxiety. I think a better way you can 'spit it all out' as you put it is to write about it or leave voice memos talking about it. That way you'll get it all out and also have physical proof of how far you've come in a few years

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    #15

    I sing songs in my head and sometimes outloud

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    #16

    I use a weighted blanket and noise canceling headphones. Usually I’ll listen to lovelytheband or Dreamers. I hope this helps :)

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    Viviane
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I used a similar idea once - I wrapped myself in blankets with only my nose sticking out. I felt like a cocoon and quite protected.

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    #17

    I published a joke one, but this is my serious one. Feed birds, listen to music, attempt to cope in school by allowing myself to not work, draw. Draw a sh*t-tonne. Just drawings everywhere. Idk man, it helps.

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    #18

    I listen to audio books. I have several on my phone at any given time and usually have headphones on me. My favorite tend to fantacy novels where the protagonist makes it through crazy situations. Its consoling to retreat to a different world where the hero triumphs problems even worse then my own.

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    #19

    Educate. If I’m feeling an intense emotion rooted in anxiety I need to either read psychological articles about the in and ands of it or I talk to my bestie who helps me work through my anxiety. Ignoring my anxiety, changing the environment, and calming exercises don’t work for me. Knowledge calms me down. I think it’s because growing up my depression and anxiety was “in my head” and to “get over it.”

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    #20

    If I am anxious about something, I usually just hop in bed and cuddle with my dog or hold my ball python and let her treadmill in him hands. It calms me down, or I watch something funny.

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    #21

    Usually - I just scream at everybody... not the best coping strategy

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    #22

    I like to draw/eat something comforting and take a long warm bubble bath :D, my shoulders always get super stiff, and it helps

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    #23

    Take my jogging shoes and run. Best through the woods. Gets the chemicals in my head right or at least I'm too tired to freak out.

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    Eckho
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If you're not good/confident at running, you can try any sort of excerise. As Miss Melek says, the chemicals in the brain trigger during excerise

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    #24

    I'm not an anxious person, but my son has issues with anxiety along with his Autism and sensory perception disorders. When he gets overwhelmed out in public, he comes to me (mom) or his Grams for tight hugs or back rubs for reassurance as well as asks for a quiet space, usually a corner, to calm himself. When he's home he will soak in a hot bath or lose himself in youtube videos while cuddled with one of the cats.

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    #25

    I usually internalise and shut down with anxiety and it eats at me. I find it helpful to share it with some friend or my brother so it doesn't stay inside me. I'm a Christian, so find praying also helps a lot. Hope you get through this well

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    Charles Bosse
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Without any critical intent, I want to say that even as a secularist I find that the ability to have an internal conversation with something "beyond yourself" that isn't necessarily passing judgement has sometimes been hugely helpful with my anxiety and depression and I think it can be a valuable practice whether or not you generally have "faith" or "religion" as your guiding compass.

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    #26

    I have already left an answer, but I also find cuddling pets helps a lot for me. I know that not everyone has a pet, and if you don't, then I suggest finding something you like doing (reading, drawing, watching YouTube, a sport, etc.) and doing that.

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    #27

    I don't. I vibe with it. Same with my depression

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    Charles Bosse
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think it's important to have some "I'm only happy when it rains" days, as long as you don't get too lost in it.

    #28

    screw reality im out *disassociates*

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    #29

    If I’m at home, usually I start to read one of my favourite books. After a few pages I start to feel better, and after a few chapters, I’ve forgotten about my anxious feelings completely!

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    #30

    Age regression! Basically when an individual goes into a childlike state of mind to cope with stress, trauma, anxiety and many more!!

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    #31

    laying in pitch black blasting mother mother in my earbuds :)

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    Nudge
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    OH YOU LISTEN TO MOTHER MOTHER *AND* GIRL IN RED??????? A FELLOW INTELLECTUAL I SEE

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    #32

    I take a long, hot shower or bath. It isn't a long-term solution, but it's a nice, relaxing way to forget about life and just be alone

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    #33

    Like others, I find making lists to be most helpful. Although sometimes the list makes me realize I have a million more things to do than I thought, and then I really freak out. So I have to schedule down time - like even if it is 15 minutes to pet a kitty or listen to music. I might be up 15 minutes later that night, but just taking the break really helps.

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    Mary Rose Kent
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It’s fantastic that you know how to take care of your mental and emotional health! Kudos to you.

    #34

    For anxiety that is obvious to me, anything that gets me out of my head helps. A bike ride, some gardening, cooking, visting with a friend, etc. There's also a deeper level of something like anxiety that I never knew I had until I started doing meditation retreats. After my first week-long retreat I saw how much my pointless, extraneous thinking affected my behavior and wasted my energy, often causing subtle anxiety and also fatigue. That was a real eye-opener.

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    #36

    I listen to lofi sleep music on big gamer headphones that are virtually noise-cancelling. If I find myself doing anything other than concentrating on the music, I immediately redirect to focusing on the beat. It helps me calm down!

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    #37

    I do the exact opposite of what I want to do

    Usually when I have an anxiety attack or just an anxiety moment in general, my first thought is about how i want to rant to my gf or friends about it. Ive done that before, it usually just causes more stress on the relationship bc you're causing them to carry the burden of whatever you're feeling with them, not that most would tell you that

    or i want to just yell or scream or cry, instead i try to do things that DISTRACT me from that feeling, like drawing, or writing, or cooking. It doesn't work half the time but sometimes it does and then i feel better

    if all else fails, just cry it out. it's healthy and makes you feel better some times.

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    #38

    I do puzzles especially number ones or even math problems. Thinking about numbers uses different pathways in the brain than thinking about all your worries and for me, it diverts my mind from the swirl of stressful words spinning around. Really, any concentrated activity that is not one you normally do can move your brain to a different place. I work with words, so numbers force me into different thought patterns. Others may find word puzzles or even jigsaw puzzles or building their old (or their kids') Lego sets to be calming.

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    #39

    This may sound childish but it actually works ; count backwards from 100 by 3

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    #40

    I take a day to myself! If I must go to school I just dont get anything done because mental health is more important than grades. If it’s not a school day I’ll put any other tasks aside unless they really have to get done and I only do what I want until I feel better which is usually only a day or 2

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    #41

    nothing but walk arond

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    Charles Bosse
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    No shock, when I stopped walking every day, my anxiety went up. It's still the best thing for it, but I don't do it nearly enough anymore.

    #42

    laying in pitch black blasting mother mother in my earbuds :)

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    Viviane
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Be careful with your hearing. Losing hearing is annoying, but getting tinnitus is really not fun. Those are permanent noises in the ears.

    #43

    I've learned to prune certain things from my memory. Sometimes I have to tell myself "I should have used another word or gesture" when no one even took offense. So I pretend it didn't happen and move on to another thought.  
    Sometimes I get obsessive thoughts. For that, I use patience. The first day, I put a rubber band around my wrist and snap it when the thought pops up. I note it. At the end of the day, I count the number of times I've had the thought. I now know that the pattern goes like this: Day 1 is hard; Day 2 the thoughts increase; Day 3 gets better and I'm fine at the end of the day. I've learned to tell myself, "Okay, here it goes again. It's annoying, but it will be over soon."

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    #45

    I accept it as my life and don't try to fight it. This may suggest I suffer less intensely, but I'm not sure that's true relatively.

    For the physical effects I'm prescribed propranolol, and this helps although not sure of long term impact of that.

    Otherwise it's been such a core part of me, it feels my brain has definitely developed around it.

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    #46

    I watch Kiki or Arietty (anime) if i have energy i ride my bike.. and mostly i play online chess.

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    #47

    go to your room, listen to calming music - i suggest coldplay or 21 pilots. or one republic.

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    #48

    I take a deep breath and try to shift my focus to something else.

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    #49

    EFT (look it up on Ecosia).
    For me, pressing the clavicle points for 10 to 20 seconds helps immediately, it relaxes immediately. Repeat if necessary

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    #50

    I have panic attacks and I've learned that thre 54321 technique really helps. You have to really focus on what's around you and identify 5 things you can see. Look at the details and describe the in your head. Then 4 things you can hear.

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