I’m extremely insecure and deep down crave all kinds of attention that comes out of terrible situations which nobody should experience. I don’t act on any of my cravings for attention as I don’t want to seem like a shitty person (I probably am a shitty person but don’t realise it yet). Can anyone give me some advice that will help until I can get proffesional help?
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Ok so I have to start this off saying unfortunately I have no advice but I want to say ur definitely not the only one. I crave constant affection and attention and amazingly enough I have friends who give me lots of it. Unfortunately this means that when I go without it I start to feel bad... Idk how to solve it but I hope things get better for you xxx
From what you wrote, it sounds like you have a mean inner voice saying you're a s****y person for wanting attention - which you are not. It's normal to seek attention to some degree, we just have to be mindful so we don't overdo it.
I'm afraid I don't have a definite piece of advice, either, but I want to let you know I can relate. As someone who spends most of their time alone, I sometimes crave attention, too, but the moment I get some, it feels awkward, wayyy too much... because I'm not really comfortable in the spotlight... It often feels like the "wrong" kind of attention, if that makes sense. Maybe this is what happens to you?
What you could do is find out what *kind* of attention you really like and is best for you. Do you like talking about a hobby or special interest? Do you enjoy when likeminded people comment on something you've made, or on your opinion, or your looks (all of this is valid)...? Do you like making people laugh? Do you like sharing pics online (also valid, just be careful with that)? You could start from there!
I don't know if this helps or not, but sometimes it's good to do things that draw attention to yourself *and* help other people. Like, if you painted something really cool, you could give it to a friend. You could feel good about yourself and also make someone's day better!
Also, you're not a bad person for wanting attention. We all do!
You just stop. 🤣😎😏
Wow that's so useful! Next time I see my friend with crippling depression and suicidal thoughts I should follow your lead and tell them to just stop! So smart! Wow!
I get the same. I'm not sure how to fix it but I've pinned down why I get it, if that might help you. I'm pretty sure it's because I worry that my friends don't think about/care about me as much as I do them, so I do mean/dumb/dangerous things to get their attention and force them to think about me. This causes a downward spiral because then the only/main attention I get is from doing those things, so I do them more because it solifies my belief that me doing said things is the only reason they think about me. Since realizing this, I've pulled myself away from doing those things (I still have an addiction to making other people laugh so that's hard to get out of) and allowed myself to see that people do in fact acknowledge me and care about me without me initiating everything. I don't think I'll ever be fully healthy, but if you can pull yourself out of this cycle, do so as fast as you can. It will only get worse
I get the same. I'm not sure how to fix it but I've pinned down why I get it, if that might help you. I'm pretty sure it's because I worry that my friends don't think about/care about me as much as I do them, so I do mean/dumb/dangerous things to get their attention and force them to think about me. This causes a downward spiral because then the only/main attention I get is from doing those things, so I do them more because it solifies my belief that me doing said things is the only reason they think about me. Since realizing this, I've pulled myself away from doing those things (I still have an addiction to making other people laugh so that's hard to get out of) and allowed myself to see that people do in fact acknowledge me and care about me without me initiating everything. I don't think I'll ever be fully healthy, but if you can pull yourself out of this cycle, do so as fast as you can. It will only get worse