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Hey Pandas, How Did You Know It Was Over And Done Beyond Repair In A Relationship?
Going thru a breakup here. I finally got to the point of where I simply had to choose peace.
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When his deceitfulness didn't effect me at all anymore. I literally did not care. I knew it was over and moved out. Best decision ever!
I knew it was over when I broke my wrist tripping in our yard that required surgery, and in the following 6 weeks while I healed, he would yell at me in front of our children when I asked him to cook dinner for us (us two and our two children) even though I had done my best to prep the ingredients.
Previously, when he broke his hand when he punched a walk in anger with me, and required surgery for his "boxers break", I obliged his expectations to care for him and lie to everyone about how he hurt himself. He had 2 months of paid medical leave from his job (software engineer) but played on his pc, cellphone and our nintendo console while I ran around caring for his sick parents, our children and him until I was exhausted.
I have a favorite place. It's a small cabin with no comfort on a lake. Lots of nature and tranquility. It was too boring for my partner, he preferred to watch TV or play on the computer. I found it sad but respected it.
Then came a difficult time. Stress, job change, many commitments. We needed time to ourselves, we needed time to talk. There was no time for a long vacation. So I asked him two weeks in advance if he would come with me to that place for a weekend. He said he doesn't know what he'll be doing in two weeks. A week earlier he replied not to stress him. Two days before he said he'd think about it, let's talk tomorrow.
And that night I realized I no longer wanted him to come with me, I realized I was looking forward to the weekend without him. I didn't want to share the place or my future life with him. I left without him, came back and moved into my own apartment.
I'm writing this while I'm in my little cabin, by the way.
The moment you said "no confort" I knew it must be an amazing place. I totally understand you. For me nowadays that's a deal breaker. I used to respect someone not liking a place because of the lack of confort but nowadays I use it as a filter.
Not a relationship but a friendship;
When she bullied me and my male friend, telling people we were boyfriend girlfriend. Then denying everything (AND GETTING AWAY WITH IT) when confronted by our teacher who for some stupid reason only brought in me and her and not my male friend who was also getting bullied by her!
Overall trying to turn everyone against me and by the end of the year nearly everyone in that class didn’t seem to like me.
I transferred schools and fell out of contact with my male friend which I deeply regret. No point in trying to hang out with him again as he probably hates me for transferring and not talking to him again, plus everyone will probably just call us boyfriend/girlfriend. Yes, our bully was not the only one saying that it was also our families.
Real kicker is that two years later I’ve discovered I’m a lesbian :p