I really want to tell my parents that I'm non-binary but I'm scared they will not understand or just not take me seriously

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#1

You should probably make it clear that you support pride beforehand (buy pride flags, mention being an ally) and if they respond positively, tell them about someone you know who's nonbinary (make up someone if necessary). If they seem to be okay with that, you should tell them that you're nonbinary. If at any point if this they seem to be actively aggressive towards queer people, you shouldn't tell them, just to keep yourself safe

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crowspectre (he/they)
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

and thats another episode of "Crow Crow Gives Insanely Good Advice"

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#2

I'm agender and had come out to my parents as bisexual a year beforehand. I knew they accepted lgbtqia+ but I still had to do a lot of explaining about the difference between sex and gender but they eventually got it that I was still their child no matter what I was. Its best to use a powerpoint or google slides if they want evidence or facts about things.

Good luck!

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~lophiiformes~
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#3

I posted something on Reddit asking if I should tell my parents that I was gay and atheist and my parents starting searching through my phone, found out about everything and banned me from talking to any of my friends every again. They act as if it never happened and still try to force religion on me and make homophobic jokes subtlety.

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ℕ𝕚𝕔𝕠 is leaving
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#4

My parents don't believe that someone can be non-binary so I don't know whether they'll accept me

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Def_not_a_snake
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I told my parents that my friends told me about X identity and looked at their reactions. If they get negative about it, don’t come out yet if you’re still dependant on them. If they seem accepting or willing to learn more, then you might be able to come out.

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#5

well to my parents? let's just say that didn't go well and they don't think someone my age can "decide" that. both times. but my friends (the ones i've told) were super supportive. they always use my pronouns, we're still working on the name thing but i get it it takes time :) i think to tell most of them i just texted them or mentioned i had a gf (not anymore but this was during the summer) and only one friend had a less than positive reaction

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freakingbee (she/they)
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Same, they were also like, “ are you sure you aren’t just trying to be like your friends?” 🙄. Same with the name thing too lol

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#6

I was serious and did the whole "still your child" bit with my parents, but in all honesty, for my friends I've either done it with a joke, or forgotten that they didn't know, mentioned it, and then realized that they didn't know.

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Ashen Mccann (They/Them)
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

with my friends, a boy right by us said to his friend "your so gay" and i said "and?" and he paused, thought about it, and went "ohhhh s**t, you serious?" and we walked away but my friends were right there and thats how they found out, then we would bring it up and then my other friends would find out, my family was all different. this was when i was 8 *_*

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#7

I'm nonbinary queer, with my parents i did the same thing crowspectre said. But with my grandparents, I gave them a note when i was 9 saying i was gay, they are religious so i was scared, they never talked about it. they never said anything, they act like im still straight. So do what crow said. If they dont accept, then f*ck them you can live with me.

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Robby (Ze/Zir)
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Can i come live with you please- My parents are homophobic, im a lesbian (maybe? I like girls and feminine nonbinarys/genderfluids) and gendernetral. Their not gonna support me, i know that already :,)

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#8

I just started putting up like little pride thingies around my room and on the pinboard above my desk I put my flags, I think they noticed cuz my mum bought me a pride marvel t shirt XD

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#9

Over text!
Ngl kinda stressful

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Ashen Mccann (They/Them)
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

i came out to my aunts, uncles, and grandma over text...it took one of them 2 two days to respond...but positively gladly

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#10

I told my super religious, controlling mom first since I knew that she would be the most difficult. After that hurdle, coming out to everyone else was easy.

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#11

The first time I came out I wrote a letter to my best friend and eventually got more comfortable talking about it so I joined a GSA. From there I just told most of my friends in the club. If you know of any LGBTQ support groups then it would be super helpful to join one. I’m still not out to my parents which can be hard but I’m hoping to be out by June in time for this pride event at my school. If you are an LGBTQ teen I would recommend The Trevor Project if you suffer from depression or just need some support. Hopefully you can come out soon and are accepted by your loved ones

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Ashen Mccann (They/Them)
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

theres a colorful critter club at our school but i cant stay after school because i take the bus. but my friend group is basically the same thing, 94% out of 22 people are gay and that is accurate because we actually calculated cuz why not :)

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#12

I'll start with asking; Do you think it would put you in an unsafe position? If you know it would, I would recommend not coming out until you've moved out. I know that must be hard, since it's related to your gender, but it would probably be for the best. If you really want to come out, have an immediate safe plan. Being able to stay at someone's house where you're accepted is the best option.

If you don't think you'll be put in an unsafe position, I'd say go for it! I'll always recommend having a safe plan just in case, especially if you're not 100% sure. Try to subtly mention a few things so it might not be such a shocker. I'd also definitely recommend coming out to friends if you haven't already. It was like a warm up for me. It took me more than a year to come out to my mom, so take it slow if you need that time to be ready for it. I wish you the best of luck! Coming out is a huge deal, and make sure you're clear on what all of of it means.

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BeepBoop is Lonely (she/they)
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#13

I gave serious hints, like telling my parents random facts about my sexuality, talking about celebrities who had my sexuality, and talking about characters I like with my sexuality. If they gave any negative hints, I would've backed off, but since they didn't, I just told them. I asked what it was like to have a crush on a girl (cause Ima lesbian) and then they asked me if I had one, and I told them yes. I went into a kinda transition stage where I told them I was open to boys too, but then I just fully came out one day randomly in the car.

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#14

A year ago today i came out to one of my friends through text. I was more terrified than i had ever been because telling someone meant that i was putting myself out there, at least to them. Luckily she’s really supportive of me and i’m so happy that i ended up telling her.

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#15

I haven't to anyone I know in person, beacause my parents are homophobes and they won't let me hang out with anyone who would be accepting either. But on the internet, no one know who I am. :D Be proud of who you are and don't lose sight of it, but if you know what you parents are like than keep yourself safe.

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anthonyjanthonycrowley(he/she)
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#16

I never did and still haven’t. If they don’t have to come out as straight, why do I have to come out as bisexual? I have a Pride tattoo on my wrist. I’m open about finding both sexes attractive. I have a rainbow Coexist sticker on my car. And…I named my last car Shane because OMFG she is insanely hot in L-Word. If they can’t figure it out, that’s on them.

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Icecream Sarang
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

thank you. why do people feel the need to go around announcing their sexuality. unless I'm attracted to someone, my choice isn't relevant.

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#17

I came out to some of my friends as genderfluid by texting the drama club group chat and everyone was super great, but I told one of my friends and she was being bítchy about it so now we’re not talking, but everyone else has been so accepting or supportive!

Maybe try to find out beforehand if they support or not. I told my two best friends and someone who I knew was lgbtq+, before everyone, just as some backup support.

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#18

When I told my mom I'd become a Christian, she was afraid I'd lose my sense of humor. (Growing up, I had been the court jester, assuaging her tyrannical rule.) Granted, it did vanish for a time, but came back refined. I laugh more now than ever.

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Buck Up
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#19

the first time a female asked my out i said that I'm straight. that's how i came out.

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Lisa Onitnelot
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Lisa Onitnelot (Submission author)
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

why do some people need to announce their sexuality? guess what, we don't care. are you kind, respectful, understanding, have good morals and principles, etc. that's all people real care about why, why, does this constantly get asked? and please don't say 'coming out to your family'. they already know and are waiting for you to be you or they're in denial (but they know).

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