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so I have a friend ill call...James. if your name is James, I'm sorry. I'm sure you're a wonderful person! so James is a super-straight and is also a kind of racist. he said the n-word once and just overall doesn't wanna be around people of color. he also has made it very clear that he thinks abortion shouldn't be legal and says your killing a baby if you have one. He's a trump supporter and kind of annoying sometimes. I really don't know if I should be friends with him anymore. can you guys help me?

#1

Hey, I'm gonna tell you now in the kindest way possible! Get away from him! He is not a part of your flock. If you don't get away from him he going to drag you down with him. And there is nothing wrong with being a Trump supporter, and he is most likely going off what his parent or guardian said. And the racist thing is definitely wrong, so don't let him get in your head with that. (As in change your perspective of view.) And once again, nothing wrong with being straight, personally I'm straight, but that does not make it right to judge others love interests and rights. Like I support animal rights, but I am not a cat or dog. And I don't really know what to say about the abortion statement.. But in the end everything will work out if you get away from him. Hang out with better kids, or other friends! I was once in your position, they will get you in trouble! Especially if the teacher does not know you! Tell your principal, assistant principal, counselor, or even teacher that "James" keeps making not school related, inappropriate comments that bother you! If non of them listen be sure to tell your parents and get them to call the school!

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#2

Nobody but you can make this call. So much depends on your history with James, and your feelings about him. I know and love people who are right across the political spectrum, religious scale, and justice bar from me, and we just avoid talking about our differences. When it comes to racism, I make it clear that I won’t tolerate racist behaviour or speech, and will become hostile towards them if they display it in my company, but the rest isn’t really my business. So long as it doesn’t generate hate, idiocy or ignorance aren’t deal-breakers in important relationships.

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#3

edit to the story: he kinda fat-shamed me? he said why is your body so big but your brain so small? not sure if that's really fat-shaming but I need helppppppppp (also ty for your responses)

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#5

I know the "James" You are talking about (The author and I go to the same school) and yes he gets really annoying sometimes, He is also transphobic and said that Trans women aren't real women and trans men aren't real men because they changed their gender. He gets really confusing sometimes because we have a friend that changes their pronouns a lot and he always respects them. I like James could be just a little confused because he does not know that much about the LGBTQIA+ community. I am not taking any sides or anything.

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Elizabeth Sundby
Community Member
2 years ago

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