Hey Amab Pandas, What Are Unspoken Aspects Of Teen And Young Adult Masculinity?

Hey yall! I'm a stealth (I present as my true gender and people assume I am AMAB) trans masc high schooler and have been having trouble fitting in. What are some rules that boys follow or types of relationships? I don't mean stereotypes, I'm thinking more along the lines of nodding instead of waving at someone.

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im a dudette (so afab) , but hang out with a bunch of dudes

nod down is formally addressing a person you barely know like a simple hello
nod up is when you know someone as a friend like "hey dude! hows it going!!"

but honestly do what feels true to u. its amazing that you are presenting your true self and you go dude!!!

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shanila.pheonix_

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shanila.pheonix_ (Submission author) 1 year ago

also id recommend looking into the bro code. its like girl code but for the dudes.

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I'm also transmasc and I'm good at passing completely but I just don't care that much cause the people I'd need to pass with are sucky people anyways, but I do have some tips

Make fun of your friends and take it well when they do it back, lighthearted teasing is a huge part of at least my whole cis friend group's humor, manspread as much as possible, take up space (I tend to stand with my legs further apart to give the impression of being bigger even though I'm fairly slim), if you want your voice to be lower relax your throat, tensing it makes ur voice get way higher. I assume you have a binder, if not you can always use multiple sports bras on backwards to hide ur chest. Stand as tall as possible without looking like ur trying too hard. Try to look less nervous and more relaxed/confident, and act confident too (I talk pretty loudly as part of this but you might not want to cause it may make ur voice get higher). Don't apologize to people for bumping into them, and try to apologize less in general. Also, when you're walking, look forwards, not down. I also find that having my hands in my pockets makes me feel more masculine/confident and I'm not sure if it translates visually but it might. There's some other small stuff but that's the bigger things I know

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