I won't drive after any alcohol. I could have one drink and would not want to drive and I don't think that's excessive. I'm not saying that's the case here but I disagree with your implication that everyone who plans ahead in order to be safe is doing it in order to "get plastered".

No, it’s not over the top. It’s the smart and safe thing to do. Nobody anywhere said they were going to get plastered, but the expectation with a cocktail hour is….. cocktails. It’s also pretty normal to have a few drinks at someone’s wedding.

It's not over the top at all, it's the most sensible thing to do. Having a few drinks over the span of a long evening isn't equal to getting plastered. Calm down...

Disagree. Even if you only plan to have a reasonable number of drinks, you should not be driving at all. A wedding is a huge party, so it's not ridiculous to plan for your own safety, whether you're a drunk looking for an open bar or a reasonable person who still wishes to celebrate with a few glasses of champagne. Dry weddings are not customary, and no notice was given—the invitation literally said "cocktail hour"—therefore multiple people made preparations to be safe by reserving rides and hotel rooms and they wasted their money.

It depends on how far it is from home more than anything. You don't have to be plastered to not want to travel after a few drinks. I wouldn't want to be in a car or on the train for more than 30 minutes if I'd had a few glasses of wine and been dancing.

Well just my point of view out of my life: I don't drink much. Once a month 1 or 2 beers, or cocktails. I had years without drinking at all, I don't need it I can have fun without alcohol and enjoy life without it. But when work is stressful I really look forward to that glass of beer or good cocktail with friends. And if I'm invited to a wedding I might really look forward to have the same there. And just like OP I'd might take quite a big effort on me to make this possible. I might have come be car and not drink anyway. But maybe because I want to celebrate with my good friend I might spend a lot of money and time to enjoy that one or two glasses there. And I don't need to ask because it's default that alcohol is served at weddings and you are expected to announce things that deviate from the default. If I only got to know on location I would be really disappointed. And it would be a burden in the friendship, not because of alcohol or not, but because of respecting your guests or not

Police know what places are hosting weddings, and they will stake them out to catch drivers under the influence. No one should be driving after drinking. OP was wise to book a hotel and uber to stay safe for everyone.

At our wedding at the time, there was little alcohol. I did not want drunk people at my wedding, yet not a completely dry eighter. So there was a toast with champagne in the afternoon. And in the evening one ( max. 2) glasses of beer or wine were served. Nothing more and nothing stronger.... My party, my money, my rules :)

Oh give me a break, you don't have to be an alcoholic to enjoy alcohol. Most adults can control themselves.

Ahh so anyone who goes to a wedding that advertises a cocktail hour and expects cocktails has a drinking problem? 🙄

I didn’t get the impression he’s mad about not drinking. It’s about wasting money on hotels and Ubers in anticipation of having a couple drinks.

You don't get the point. It's okay to have a dry wedding, but guests could have saved money by driving themselves had they known beforehand. Not going to a wedding because of no alcohol would be awful though.

The invitation mentioned a cocktail hour, not a mocktail or soda and water hour, but a cocktail and all cocktails are alcoholic, so full disclosure, groom and bride should have made it clear in the invite.

You are expected to announce if you deviate from the norm. Otherwise people rightfully assume your wedding is just like any other wedding and prepare accordingly.

Just because someone likes a drink, or even getting shįtfaced occasionally, it doesn't mean they're alcoholic or have a drink problem.

I would expect a dry wedding to be let know, mostly because of the travel planning.. At a wedding you normally have 2 welcome drinks, then half a bottle of wine per person, a glass of bubbles to toast each, this is a standard wedding package.. and that is way too much to drink and then drive afterwards, so to avoid there having to be a designated driver people often will stay at/near the wedding venue... If you have a dry wedding, that is fine, but let people know as they will probably have different travel plans... I've never been to a dry wedding, it is something I thought only happened on American films...