Some people might go to extreme lengths to keep up a lie. Whether it’s a case of innocent deception or covering for something more serious, it might be too late to take it back. Or too shameful to reveal the truth.
Members of the 'Ask Reddit' community shared their best stories of people trying to uphold their lies. We have gathered some of the most amusing or shocking examples here for you to enjoy. They might remind you why you shouldn't lie in the first place. Or prove how difficult it can be trying to get out of the web you’ve created.
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One time in high school soon after I got my license but didn't have a car yet my mom let me take her mini van for a night to a friend's house. I told my mom it was a regular sleepover but it was actually a house party I was going to. On my way of pulling out of my own driveway I hit the garbage can with my mom's sideview mirror and it shattered into pieces and fell clean off. I didn't want to go back inside and risk her being upset and telling me I couldn't go to the party so I just picked up the pieces off the driveway, threw them in the front seat, and took off to the party. I had a good night of fun and woke up so hungover I had forgotten that I even crashed the car beforehand. When I walked outside to the van I broke down in hungover tears of shame and anxiety. I hopped in the car and parked in a Barnes and noble parking lot and just cried and tried to think of a game plan.
I must have still been a little buzzed cause going home without a bogus story was overwhelmingly out of my scope of reasoning. I noticed a plow truck drive by in the snow and BINGO. With real tears and panic in my voice I called my mom from the parking lot and told her that as I was inside Barnes and Noble that morning (I never even went inside) a plow truck must have hit her sideview mirror with it's plow and I didn't know what to do, sob sob, cry cry whatever. My mom told me to pick up the pieces and come home.
I came home a hot mess, smelling of alcohol, headache, red eyes from no sleep and dirty with the stench of lies. My mom played like she felt bad for me and said "hop back in the car, we will go to the police station and report the accident. They probably had camera that caught the whole thing." I felt like I was going to throw up as I stared the officer in the eyes and told him (half drunk still) this bogus, over the top, story I made up. He told me how making up lies like this could get me in trouble and said he would call back when the camera footage came back.
I didn't sleep for like a week. I was terrified. Nothing ever happened from the ordeal and life went on and the car got fixed. Yearssss later I told my mom the truth and she laughed and said she saw the whole thing happen in live time and told the police officer ahead of time what was going on. She told him to play along and scare me...
Lesson learned.
Not me but when I started as a newspaper journalist 20 years ago our leader writer was a man called Edward.
I only found out when he retired after 45 years with the paper that his name wasn’t Edward at all. When he started aged 16 one of the paper’s owners showed him round and had misheard his name.
He was too nervous to correct the owner so he went by the wrong name for nearly 50 years. His real name is Dudley.
My partner and I pretended to be vegetarian for 10 years to avoid her aunt’s awful cooking. By the end we were actually vegetarian.
I didn't want to go to a neighbor's party, but they could see my car, so I drove to a town 40 minutes away just to have an excuse not to go.
My entire family thinks I met my husband online on discord. I actually met him during a threesome.
I once worked in a smallish and pretty casual office. There was a park nearby where I'd go for a walk at lunch and sometimes I'd sit in the grass and do a few stretches before heading back. Well one day I guess a decent amount of leaves had gotten stuck to my long sweater, I went to the bathroom when I got back and a handful fell on the stall floor without my awareness. Not too long after, someone comes out wondering who would put a pile of leaves in the bathroom and why. It blew up very quickly and spread around the office. I knew it had to be me. Being the "outdoorsy person" I was questioned a few times. At the time I was very shy with a back corner desk where I'd pop in headphones and do my editing work, I definitely did not want attention so I denied it and acted clueless when asked, thinking it'd end with the day. It did not. The next day, my manager was greeted by a small pile of leaves on their desk in the morning. It became a war, it went on for weeks. I was too deep to admit the truth now. Leaves on desks, leaves dropped on heads, leaves stuck to the backs of shirts. It finally culminated on Halloween when TWO women from different departments came in dressed as piles of leaves. I never said a word!
I've spent more than eight years in the same residence.
My neighbours are quite welcoming. Every time they see me go outside, they say hello, especially the wife. Every time, she'll wave, say, "Hi, Rebecca!" and flash a wide smile.
Rebecca is not my name. At this time, it would be too awkward to fix. I simply had to take responsibility for it.
I had surgery for something that wasn’t even an issue.
When I was in middle school I enjoyed faking being sick so I was able to skip school, especially if that meant my parents were at work and I was all alone. I was able to make hot chocolate and play video games all day. It was a great time.
At the time I didn’t think much about the excuses I used, so most of the time it was just “sore throat”.
After having used that excuse several times over the period of a year my parents finally took me to the doctor to have my throat looked at. They did find one of my tonsils was noticeably larger than the other one and figured this could have been the cause of my issues. So they suggested surgically removing it. I was around 10 years old so I didn’t realize what surgery really was so I didn’t come clean.
A few weeks later I was on the surgical table.
To this day I haven’t told my parents about it. I’m 26.
On the positive side I was ordered to stay home from school for 14 days after the surgery and the doctor told me to eat lots of ice cream. So it was a win for me, I guess.
Met my wife on one of those telephone chat dating things in the 90's. Basically, before OKCupid, you would sign up for a voicemail and describe yourself. We connected and went out but were both embarrassed for using it. Fast forward 18 years, we continue to tell everyone we met in the music section at Borders.
My mom is white and blonde, my stepdad is italian and I'm black and look exactly like my father. Walking around with them in public attracted a look of confused looks, one time I caught a dude looking and told him I was adopted from Africa. Some of my friends heard it and they all believed me instantly. I managed to keep that lie for 2 weeks, in the process I had to keep learning and making comments about Africa during conversations to appear sincere.
I'm sorry but what is happening with that rogue bit of hair in the picture? It's literally not connected to her hands or anything. Unless.... it's magic?
So it was sophomore year of high school, I took 1 class of basic 3D modeling as an elective. Keep in mind BASIC my models were bad but what are going to expect from a 16 y/o. A little later I was playing on a Minecraft pixelmon server (Pokémon in Minecraft) where I made friends with the owner and became a moderator. The owner of the server was also on the development team of the mod and he asked in the discord if anyone has any 3D modeling experience, I said I did (not a lie), he asked me if I could fix a current model he had that was giving him issues so I said sure (again basic, me moving the model was a miracle) but I looked up a bunch of tutorials and forcibly taught my self how to model. Over the course of the next year and a half I kept teaching my self and learning and I'd say I got pretty good at 3D modeling, and for a brief stint (before I left the project) I became the head 3D artist of the whole project and made decent money)
Mage (sever owner and dev of the mod) if you are seeing this, sorry for the lie, and thanks for the opportunity's
It's a long story but if you ever see me around my grandparents please refer to me as *Doctor* TallEnoughJones
My brother got away with one for 15 years because he doesn’t like cats.
Ex-SIL: “I’ve always loved cats but he’s allergic”
Mom: “no he’s not”
Brother: “c**p!”
I wonder why she’s an ex… Edit so that I don’t get downvoted into oblivion: /j
When I was a kid, I came home from school. But mom wasn't home yet and the backdoor was locked and I didn't have a key. I got a little mad and kicked the door. Of course that piece of s**t broke down. I freaked out: if mom sees this, she's gonna [take me out]. But then I came up with a plan.
We lived next to a forest so I go into forest look for the biggest, heaviest branch I could find. I pulled that f****r out of woods and I gently put into the the gaping hole in the door. Looked totally legit.
Then mom came home. She took one look at it and slapped me in the face.
I used to sit in my car for hours a day to act like I went out. I was too scared of my parents to tell them I dropped out of college. I eventually got a job and used that as a cover until I had enough to move out.
In my early 20s, I worked as an in home caretaker of the elderly. When I was first hired with the company, I was sent to a lot of one-day jobs, like if the client’s regular caregiver was unavailable I would go fill in and then never see them again.
Being a young lady, they ALL would ask me if I was in college, which I wasn’t. I was a college dropout. And soon I got sick of the disapproving faces of these seniors whenever I would answer that I was not in school.
One day, I arrived to another client who was new to me. Sweet older couple. They asked me, as they all did, if I was in school. I was convinced I would never see these guys again, as was true for every client of mine up to this point, so I just answered yes I’m in nursing school.
I ended up being their regular caregiver for over two years. They often asked me how school was going. My best friend was actually in nursing school, so I always just parroted whatever she told me she was learning lol.
Whew, there for a second I thought this was gonna turn into them wanting to pay her tuition or something! Glad that wasn’t the case. Lol
TL;DR: My grandma stubbornly lied about her age for over 70 years.
My grandmother was always incredibly vague about when she was born, how old she was when she came to the USA, how old she was when she was married, etc. Even her birthday was vague: In the old country (Eastern Europe) birthdays weren't such a big deal, so her parents chose an approximate birthday for her visa. (NB: Her parents chose Jan 15, which later became MLK day. She was pretty racist, so we'd always mess with her on her birthday by wishing her a happy MLK day.)
Anyway, on one of her birthdays she said to my mom "You know, you don't think of yourself as old, and then you get to be my age, and you have to admit it - you're old!"
My mom thought this was a strange thing to say for someone she thought was turning 77.
"Mom, how old *are* you?"
"How old do you *think* I am?"
"Now I think you're 80."
My grandmother did not confirm or deny my mother's guess.
Years later, when my grandfather died, we cleaned out his desk and found her old passport. Indeed, we found out that she came to this country in 1921 and lied about her age ever since.
In fact, she kept it up with everyone outside the family. She moved to an assisted living facility closer to my immediate family when she was in her mid-90s and never told anyone at the facility her age. Every month the kitchen would bring out a cake for people with a birthday that month - the oldest person with a birthday that month got to blow out the candles. They would ask "Who has a birthday this month?" A lot of hands would go up.
"Who has a birthday this month and is over 80?" A couple of hands would go down.
"Over 85?" A few more hands would go down.
"Over 90?" A bunch more hands lost.
Et cetera. My grandma? She never raised her hand.
We blew her cover with a 100th birthday party. Even her hairdresser had no idea.
She died at 103, outliving her cardiologist (who was 40+ years her junior) by six years.
She also lied about making gefilte fish. Then one day my mom found a jar of store-bought gefilte fish hidden in the laundry room behind boxes of detergent. When my mom brought up the jar and silently pointed to it, grandma exclaimed, "You never noticed!"
My old grandfather was born at home as all children during that time. When the parents "registred" his birth with the local priest he misheared them (his parents) and put my grandfathers birthday as the 3rd instead of the 23rd. So for the rest of my grandfathers life, all official papers he got from doctors, goverment, drivers license and so on had his birthday as the 3rd. Not a big deal, but it was a little weird. 😊
When I was eight, I was a chatterbox and one day, I ended up getting detention because I wouldn't stop talking or whatever so I get this "detention notice" slip that must be signed by a parent or guardian and returned the next day.
My little Machiavellian mind quickly made up a scheme. I went home and I told my parents that I wanted to make my own signature, so I asked to see how my parents did theirs. I practiced my mother's signature until I was comfortable and then I forged the slip. My teacher didn't catch the forgery, and I got away with it lol.
I'm still super proud of that little psycho 🤣
I was 16 or 17 at the time. Didn’t want to go into work (I was a cashier at a grocery store). Called there before my shift and said “sorry I can’t come into work. I was out drinking in the woods last night and when the cops showed up we ran. I tripped and broke both of my arms.”
Boss says ok fine whatever. A few hours later an executive from work calls me and says I can miss work but I need to come down and show them my arms (obviously not believing me).
Well, my mom was at work as a nurse in the ER. I called her and asked if she could get me some casts. She obliges and my buddy and I drive over to the hospital to pick them up.
Head back to the house and begin forming the casts around both wrists/forearms. Let them harden and then grab some markers and have my siblings write things like get well soon on the casts. Head down to the grocery store to show my broken arms to the bosses and they had no reason to doubt at that time.
Went home, cut the casts off and didn’t go back to work for a few weeks. I don’t even remember why I didn’t want to go into work but it was probably just so I could stay home playing Xbox 360 with my friend
I didn't want to come to work one day, so I called and said someone stole my car so I couldn't make it. Then for the next two weeks I had to take the bus and walk 3 miles from the bus stop to my job, and after those two weeks I had my drivers' side window rolled down and taped clear plastic over the window to appear that someone had broken into it, so I could further show that the car had been stolen.
In retrospect it probably wasn't worth all the trouble.
I once burnt chocolate chip cookies I was making for a baby shower. In a last ditch effort, I picked up two dozen cookies from McDonald's. My plan wasn't to mention anything to anyone, but one of our close friends was asking about the recipe and I said it was a McDonald's copycat recipe I found on Pinterest.
I quickly found a recipe I'd never tried before and shared it with her. My husband jumped on board and supported me, even though he knew the truth. He even promised to never tell a soul about the McDonald's cookies. It's been about three years now and nothing ever came of it, but it's one lie that he and I joke about every so often.
About 10 years ago when my son was in college he had a fund raiser & I made my cheesecake brownies. The local TV station interviewed him because they were the first thing to sell out, he made up an entire story about how he came up the recipe on the fly when he realized he did not have graham crackers to make a cheese cake crust. To this day he has never baked a thing in his life & we always joke about this. If someone asks me to make them I say I have to call him for the recipe
None of my family knows how I met my wife. They think I met her in California through a friend out there when I was in the military. We actually met on Tumblr.
We've been married almost 10 years.
My husband told everyone he had cancer. Then a few years later said it returned. After he said it returned, I found out it wasn't true either time. I have kept his secret from everyone. Everyone we know believes he is a cancer survivor. The stress of it is killing me. My throat burns 24/7 from stomach acid and I'm pretty sure I have an ulcer. I have isolated myself from everyone I know. Gave up social media except Reddit because it's anonymous. The only people I see now are 2 family members and my therapist. On top of it, he left me and is off living his life.
I used to live with a pathological liar. He was a fun guy but stories would be embellished or completely made up. In time people would look to me to find the truth, and I told them usually with a 'but' or a 'however' to soften the blow. I understand while you were with the guy because of the reflection on you, whether it's justified or not. But, for the love of all things sacred why on earth would you keep the secret after he left you????
With a few exceptions (my family and my best friends), most people think I am gay. I'm actually asexual, but because asexuality isn't as well-understood like being gay or bi are, I usually default to telling strangers/acquaintances that I am queer. Most of the time this works fine--because nearly everyone will understand that this means I'm not straight, and most don't want to discuss it further. (I also happen to live in an area where it's a coin-toss as to whether someone you're talking to is an ally or a bigot).
But some people *do* want to discuss it further, and these people will without fail follow this statement with, "Oh, you're a *lesbian????* There's this girl I know that's looking for a girlfriend I should introduce you two!" At that point, it's game over. They get extremely confused if I try to tell them I'm not *gay*.
"But you're not straight?"
*No, I don't like men.*
"So you must like girls."
*No, I don't like them either.*
"But you said you were gay!"
*No, I said I was queer. I'm asexual, I don't like men or women.*
"Oh you're just in the closet, it's okay!!"
I eventually just gave up. I say I'm queer, and if people interpret it as me being gay I don't correct them. I just make vague comments about already having a partner and never speak of it in front of them. My parents think it's hilarious.
Say you're strictly necrophiliac and the conversion therapy hasn't worked yet? That should shut them all up, religious or 'ally'.
It was an unspoken lie. My dad was visiting me (I live on the lower level of my parent's house lol) and one of my bullet vibrators was just... *there on my couch*. I saw it while talking to him and double taked, unsure if he saw it. I guessed from a slight shift in energy that he did, but it was lipstick shaped, so I started spontaneously packing up my items for a trip I actually had to pack for, throwing the vibrator in my makeup case and mentioning that I left my makeup everywhere.
I don't think he believed me for a moment. But I hope he appreciated my half asked attempt to bring him peace of mind.
In school i accidentally left a notebook in a class. It was a new notebook and during that class I’d only written one page… a rather embarrassing page. Well i realized later I’d forgotten it and someone was going to find it and open it to see whose it was and be met with no name, just a page of writing so bizarre that they’re surely going to want to find who wrote it. So i started faking an entire new notebook of notes and assignments using a whole made up handwriting style. Eventually the principle called me into her office and asked me if that notebook was mine. I told her it was not and that doesnt look like my writing and i showed her my other notebook for comparison.
I once sprayed the whole 3 acre yard, house, garage, porch, etc... down with a hose on a july afternoon so my dad would think it rained and i wouldnt get in trouble for not mowing the lawn.
When I was a dumb teenager, I wouldn’t take my full dose of antibiotics when I would get a UTI (which I would get often at the time). So now there are two very common antibiotics that won’t work for me. I’ve tried explaining to doctors so many times, but they always insist it will be fine, the infection doesn’t go away, and I have to go back in. Another copay and another round of antibiotics to pay for. So now I’m allergic.
She took too small a dose so she didn't kill ALL the bacteria. But she did kill some of them, and the survivors were stronger against that particular medicine. Eventually she got them trained to be resistant.
Load More Replies...If you're getting UTIs all the time there is some other problem causing them that needs to be fixed. The doctor did the wrong thing by giving repeated perscriptions for antibiotics.
I *hope* she means that now she simply lies and tells the doctors she is allergic to those particular drugs so they won't prescribe them to her.
Load More Replies...The newest scientific studies debunk the myth of taking the full course of antibiotics. For *most* illnesses it is absolutely fine to stop taking the antibiotics when you feel better, and it actually reduces the chances of bacterial resistance, reduces recovery time of the microbiome, and produces better outcomes. Obviously, this advice does not follow for serious or life-threatening conditions (don't stop your treatments for tuberculosis or hepatitis people).
I had a chance to meet my favorite band at the time (white chapel), but had to work, so I called and said I got into a car crash 2 cities over (the city where the band was). My boss said to send him a pic of the car before I could come back to work. So me and a friend went and crashed it into a derelict telephone pole at about 20 mph after jumping a ditch. It was an old Honda prelude and it just f*****g crumpled. Sent a pic to my boss and he said "are you okay that looks horrible!". The engine wasn't damaged and it still ran fine. Met the band, and drove the car to work the next day. My boss told me to go home and recover. He paid me for both days and I played call of duty mw2 (the original) all day.
I didn't want to eat chili, so my first response was "I am cutting back on my meat intake.
Went vegan for 2 years.
I called out of work with the excuse that my truck had died when I was on my way to work. My manager at the time said he would give me a paid day off if I brought him a receipt for the tow truck the next day. I said ok, hung up the phone and began to panic because my truck was sitting at home in perfect working order. I went to office max, bought a pack of those contractor work order pads along with some receipt paper. Went home and researched average tow rates, if it’s taxed, etc. Forged a tow truck work order, went online and found some fake receipt website where you just fill in the info and it makes a receipt you can print, printed a fake receipt with a made up to company’s name, and my friends name and phone number on it. Made sure the time on the receipt matched up with when I called out, made the handwriting look almost illegible on the work order, and gave my friend a heads up that someone from my employer might be calling him to verify the tow, just incase. Took the customer copy of the fake tow work order, stapled the receipt to the top right corner of the paper, and folder it up to look as legitimate as humanly possible. Took a different car to work the next morning to make it seem more legitimate. Set it on my managers desk the next morning, and mentioned that I left the tow receipt on his desk when I saw him. Never heard anything about it and received the paid day off. Ended up selling the truck shortly after and mentioned that I had “sold that piece of s**t” to my manager to cover my tracks even more.
I suspect all this took nearly as much time and effort as just going to work...
Not me, but my sister. Two particular accounts come to mind:
* In 2008, my sister and her then-husband announced they were pregnant. We were happy for her, but as the months went along, things stopped adding up. She was gaining weight, but there was literally no baby bump of any kind. To be fair, she was and still is a bigger woman, so we gave her the benefit of the doubt.
Then, she'd say she had an ultrasound or some other pregnancy-based appointment. Thing is, whenever I or anyone else would ask to see the ultrasound pictures, she always had some sort of excuse. Either, "the doctors wouldn't let me have them," "I spilled water on them and have to get new copies," etc. Around the time she *should* have delivered the baby, there was still no baby bump of any kind.
Long story short, she eventually admitted she and her husband made up the entire pregnancy and she wasn't pregnant. She was in a bad place mentally and faked the pregnancy for sympathy, attention, etc. It was at that moment that I stopped believing anything she said unless there was some sort of verifiable proof, which leads me to...
* 2009, when she again began gaining weight. This time around, she even began to develop a baby bump. However, she and her husband swore there was no pregnancy. Despite the growing bump, there were no check-ups, ultrasounds or anything of the nature scheduled.
So imagine my surprise when in March, I get a phone call from my dad saying she had given birth to a son. I was flabbergasted because once more she lied through her teeth for nine months but this time around it was a total 180 in nature.
Unfortunately, her son was born with autism and to this day, I sometimes wonder if this is because she didn't go to any sort of OBGYN check-ins. On the other hand, I feel she did take every precaution this time around and was just given a bad hand.
To add insult to injury, she actually appeared on an episode of TLC's *I Didn't Know I was Pregnant.* When she told me the producers accepted her story, she asked if I'd be willing to be on camera for interview soundbites. I flat-out refused and told her to not involve me in any of it, because I am fairly certain she indeed knew she was pregnant.
It goes without saying that my sister and I no longer have the best of relationships.
Well, there was this one time I pretended not to know what a potato was (as a joke), and my partner’s parents thought I was serious. So I made the poor decision to commit to the lie, which enraged them and resulted in a huge fight and I am now so committed the only way out for me is if they actually believe I don’t know what a potato is.
F**k, I had to be in 6th grade when one of my teachers threatened to call home. I didn’t want to get in trouble and in like a sarcastic way I said I don’t have a home. I was actually in my dads custody and didn’t really talk much to my mom so I was just trying to stop them from calling my dad. My teacher actually took that serious and I had to talk to my school counselor trying to convince him I was homeless and my parents abandoned me. It only took a couple of calls to call out my b******t but I guess I took it pretty far. Went on like 2-3 days
I was seeing a guy that my friends didn’t want me to be seeing. I went to his house and parked in his driveway but when we took his car to go get dinner he backed right into my car and smashed the headlight and left a nice dent. My friend who didn’t want me to see this guy works on cars so I gathered up all the broken bits of my headlight, towed my car to my work, scattered the broken bits to recreate the illusion that someone had backed into my car at work. I then called my friend and he came with his tow truck and got my car. To this day he has no idea what really happened to my car.
I couldn’t face school and pretended to be unwell with stomach ache. I was being badly bullied but didn’t feel I could tell anyone. Anyway my mum ended up taking me to the doctors because I had “stomach ache” all the time. They referred me to a specialist and we spent so much wasted time having it investigated. Probably the saddest thing about this, looking back now, is that my mum found me crying many times so eventually I told her I was being bullied. She just shook her head and told me not to be silly, walked off and that was it. And that’s how I learnt to definitely *never* tell my parents anything.
I went to undergrad school at a university in Southern California. The stipend that was supposed to cover entertainment, shopping & eating out wasn’t enough for my tastes at the time, so I decided to find a part time job. Something that my family was opposed to, because they wanted me to focus on school. I fell into a high-end, gay escort “ring” (that was eventually busted & somewhat notorious), but ended up going out on my own. I had a college friend who did it with me. We’d often get taken to high-end places, nice trips, Hollywood events & even some awards and industry shows. I wasn’t ashamed about the work & it often didn’t involve secs. Still, I didn’t want my family to know nor did I want to explain it to friends. The cover story was that this friend’s (the “business” partner) aunt lived alone in LA (true) & had MS. We were her help, often heading out at a moments notice & over weekends/vacations. He told his people that I had the aunt. This cover story worked all 4+ years.
Except when I ask if these jeans make my a*s look fat. Then lie to me. Lie, lie, lie.
Load More Replies...When I started online in the 90s one of the things you were told was to never share your private info with anyone and if anyone asks, you're married. It was for safety reasons. In 2001 a show called Alias with Jennifer Garner came out about a woman who was spy. One of her aliases was Kate Jones which is how I got this user name. I've had is for 22 years. I ended up meeting friends online, not thinking it would be anything, but they ended up being really great friends. For literally over 10 years they thought my name was Kate Jones and that I was married because that was my story and at that point it had been so long I just didn't know how to tell them without it being super weird. I'm not sure why I didn't just tell them the truth, but they just liked my story and I felt weird. I'd lied about it so long that at that point it I truly felt like I was a pos. We eventually fell out of touch but I still feel so horrible about it.
Honest question: Why are so many people lying about weird and unimportant stuff? Being on the spectrum, I tend to tell the truth more often (or more bluntly) than acceptable; I have a very hard time understanding this concept of making things up for fun, to get an advantage or to fool somebody. I am absolute shįt at telling lies! I can understand if you lie in order not to be punished/hurt/harmed in any way, yes, yes of course - but inventing a whole different heritage? In order to weasle my way into a group of people, knowing full well that they bond over their Filipino heritage that I do not share? Even learning the language, and then wondering why people no longer like me after coming clean? Sorry - stories like that fly right over my head...
Some of these are quite elaborate. My mom was sick a lot so I didn't want to bother her with having to sign off on schoolwork that I messed up on. So I made a homemade "autograph book" and had her sign it. I cut the signature out and glued it to the paper to be signed. It was not very convincing but no one ever mentioned it, so I guess teach didn't look too closely at it.
Sis, on her third divorce but when she married #3 she didn't disclose on the marriage license that she had been married & divorced to husband #2. So in retrospect she's not really legally married to #3. #3 has no idea there was a #2, anyway I don't know if they really need to do the whole divorce thing, as I'm not sure they're even married! 🤣🤣🤣
Everyone thinks my husband and I got married this past year. We actually married in 2018, three months into our relationship.
OK, so in middle school we were given books to read at home and our parents had to sign a fn reading card with the amount of pages red per day. The first time it happened, I read the whole 60p book in one evening (the normal amount of pages I red per day at that time was above 200 - I was addicted to books). My mother signed the card, no problem. Then I came in for class and the teacher yelled at me for trying fraudulent behaviour. She thought I had signed off as my mother, so as not to read the book. I was so offended, I didn't argue. I just spent years signing for my parents several pages at a time, for it to appear that I read at a "normal" pace. Yes, I actually forged their signature to make my teachers believe I was a slow reader. For years.
My entire childhood I lied about broken family and where my bruises came from. Had to say “I was just accident prone”. Was also told by my folks about the horrors of foster homes as a horrid scare tactic. Don’t pity me, just help me with aiding in abolishing corporeal punishment.
I couldn’t face school and pretended to be unwell with stomach ache. I was being badly bullied but didn’t feel I could tell anyone. Anyway my mum ended up taking me to the doctors because I had “stomach ache” all the time. They referred me to a specialist and we spent so much wasted time having it investigated. Probably the saddest thing about this, looking back now, is that my mum found me crying many times so eventually I told her I was being bullied. She just shook her head and told me not to be silly, walked off and that was it. And that’s how I learnt to definitely *never* tell my parents anything.
I went to undergrad school at a university in Southern California. The stipend that was supposed to cover entertainment, shopping & eating out wasn’t enough for my tastes at the time, so I decided to find a part time job. Something that my family was opposed to, because they wanted me to focus on school. I fell into a high-end, gay escort “ring” (that was eventually busted & somewhat notorious), but ended up going out on my own. I had a college friend who did it with me. We’d often get taken to high-end places, nice trips, Hollywood events & even some awards and industry shows. I wasn’t ashamed about the work & it often didn’t involve secs. Still, I didn’t want my family to know nor did I want to explain it to friends. The cover story was that this friend’s (the “business” partner) aunt lived alone in LA (true) & had MS. We were her help, often heading out at a moments notice & over weekends/vacations. He told his people that I had the aunt. This cover story worked all 4+ years.
Except when I ask if these jeans make my a*s look fat. Then lie to me. Lie, lie, lie.
Load More Replies...When I started online in the 90s one of the things you were told was to never share your private info with anyone and if anyone asks, you're married. It was for safety reasons. In 2001 a show called Alias with Jennifer Garner came out about a woman who was spy. One of her aliases was Kate Jones which is how I got this user name. I've had is for 22 years. I ended up meeting friends online, not thinking it would be anything, but they ended up being really great friends. For literally over 10 years they thought my name was Kate Jones and that I was married because that was my story and at that point it had been so long I just didn't know how to tell them without it being super weird. I'm not sure why I didn't just tell them the truth, but they just liked my story and I felt weird. I'd lied about it so long that at that point it I truly felt like I was a pos. We eventually fell out of touch but I still feel so horrible about it.
Honest question: Why are so many people lying about weird and unimportant stuff? Being on the spectrum, I tend to tell the truth more often (or more bluntly) than acceptable; I have a very hard time understanding this concept of making things up for fun, to get an advantage or to fool somebody. I am absolute shįt at telling lies! I can understand if you lie in order not to be punished/hurt/harmed in any way, yes, yes of course - but inventing a whole different heritage? In order to weasle my way into a group of people, knowing full well that they bond over their Filipino heritage that I do not share? Even learning the language, and then wondering why people no longer like me after coming clean? Sorry - stories like that fly right over my head...
Some of these are quite elaborate. My mom was sick a lot so I didn't want to bother her with having to sign off on schoolwork that I messed up on. So I made a homemade "autograph book" and had her sign it. I cut the signature out and glued it to the paper to be signed. It was not very convincing but no one ever mentioned it, so I guess teach didn't look too closely at it.
Sis, on her third divorce but when she married #3 she didn't disclose on the marriage license that she had been married & divorced to husband #2. So in retrospect she's not really legally married to #3. #3 has no idea there was a #2, anyway I don't know if they really need to do the whole divorce thing, as I'm not sure they're even married! 🤣🤣🤣
Everyone thinks my husband and I got married this past year. We actually married in 2018, three months into our relationship.
OK, so in middle school we were given books to read at home and our parents had to sign a fn reading card with the amount of pages red per day. The first time it happened, I read the whole 60p book in one evening (the normal amount of pages I red per day at that time was above 200 - I was addicted to books). My mother signed the card, no problem. Then I came in for class and the teacher yelled at me for trying fraudulent behaviour. She thought I had signed off as my mother, so as not to read the book. I was so offended, I didn't argue. I just spent years signing for my parents several pages at a time, for it to appear that I read at a "normal" pace. Yes, I actually forged their signature to make my teachers believe I was a slow reader. For years.
My entire childhood I lied about broken family and where my bruises came from. Had to say “I was just accident prone”. Was also told by my folks about the horrors of foster homes as a horrid scare tactic. Don’t pity me, just help me with aiding in abolishing corporeal punishment.