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Mom’s Brutally Honest Post Explains Why You Don’t Owe Strangers Candy For Sitting Next To Your Babies
We’ve all been on an airplane where some inconsolable baby just won’t stop crying. Some parents try to make it easier for their fellow passengers by handing out goodie bags as a pre-emptive apology, but one mom has written an honest article arguing against such a trend. “Every time I see one of these baggies go viral I am filled with rage,” wrote Cassie Murdoch for Mashable recently.
“These goody bags…send the message we should feel bad for having babies who act like babies. We shouldn’t.” Check out her full article below.
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Image credits: Lars Plougmann
This Friday, reddit user “Fe_Mike” posted a photo of gift baggy and a little note “written” by a three-month old with the comment, “Lady on the airplane just handed this to all of the rows around us. She now has an entire team of passengers ready to help.”
Image credits: Fe_Mike
“If this sounds familiar, it’s because these little handouts — usually filled with some candy and a set of ear plugs — have become a full-on viral trend. On the surface it’s a nice gesture, but as the mother of twin toddlers, every time I see one of these baggies go viral I am filled with rage. Other moms and dads I’ve talked to say the same thing. That’s not to say the individual parents who give these out are doing anything wrong. They’re just trying to be nice — a good instinct in these tense times,” writes Cassie.
Image credits: Juanmonino
“The cumulative effect, though, of these goody bags sweeping the feel-good internet is to build in the unrealistic expectation that the next time you board a plane and see someone holding a baby that person owes you a preemptive apology in the form of Tootsie Rolls. The thing about these goody bags that has rubbed many parents the wrong way from the start is that they send the message we should feel bad for having babies who act like babies. We shouldn’t.”
Image credits: Ninjashares
“If my child screams, it may annoy you. But there are a million ways adults can be equally annoying — and they should know better. I once spent a flight trapped next to a man who packed and consumed not one but three intensely smelly tuna sandwiches during the course of the trip. I did not receive a single goody bag for my suffering.”
Image credits: Radist
“Surviving air travel with our sanity intact is hard enough for all of us, not just parents. But most people who fly with their kid have also dragged a car seat, a stroller, extra food and diapers, and approximate 9,000 tons of other miscellaneous supplies. The next time I wrestle my wriggling toddlers and all their crap onboard, I shouldn’t have to also stress that I failed to bring a dozen charming packages full of snacks for everyone around me.”
Image credits: gigantomachy
“We may not be handing you Instagram-worthy gifts, but the vast majority of parents are already going above and beyond to make sure our children don’t bother you during the flight. Trust me when I say, the most stressful part of traveling with a baby is not trying to clean up the inevitable poopsplosion in the minuscule aircraft lavatory during turbulence. It’s worrying non-stop for the entire journey that our child will become inconsolable and disrupt the trip of every passenger within shouting distance.”
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What do you think ?
Michelle Brideau 8 years ago
These are a terrible idea. I'm an adult with no kids but I understand babies can't be reasoned with and they might cry on a flight. I'm grownup enough not to need a goody bag to be pacified. I do have issues with parents who are oblivious to their children's ill behaviour and resent having to ask a child behind me to stop kicking my chair but I will, nicely, if I have to.
Daria B 8 years ago
I like your reply. It's rational, honest, unpretentious, practical. I wish I could upvote it to the top.
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LizzyM 8 years ago
It's not about apologizing for your baby acting like a baby, it's about being considerate to your fellow travellers who are stuck for hours in a small, crowded and confined space with your crying offspring.
Anisa Hadi 8 years ago
Yes it is the result... but I just think everybody paid the same amount of fee to purchase their ticket. So I find it rather unfair that some people get to sleep next to adults who are peaceful while some people have no choice but to tolerate next to screaming babies because they've got no absolute clue as to who they'll be seated next to when they picked their seats online. It takes two to tolerate, good adults wouldn't complain and would tolerate the best that they could when seated next to a crying baby although I can tell you that this isn't very easy at all! So as a parent, you could at least appreciate their tolerance. Yes I'd be annoyed If I get seated next to a baby but being an honest person, I would at least feel much more appreciated if the parents go the extra mile by handing ear plugs for example. I'd consider them respectful and well-prepared set of parents, and in return, this also improves my level of tolerance as a person.
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Stephanie Hutner 8 years ago
I see the point of this, but it doesn't change how I feel about screaming kids.Especially when the adult isn't doing a damn thing to calm it
Juan 8 years ago
Moms, you are right. You should not feel obliged to hand out goodiebags. You should probably just consider, if it is f*****g necessary to constantly fly around the world with your babies and annoy thw hell out of most people around you. And dont you pull the "im a mom and its so stressful.. My. Life is hell" - card. Nobody forced you to have babies. On my last business-flights i had at least 3, sometimes 16! Babies on the plane.. Most of them crying, which is understabdable. Nonetheless... Fuckn annoying.
Nyree Huh 8 years ago
I agree with you fully, I hate it when parents feel entitled because they have children or that makes them special somehow. No one forced you to have the kids so get off your high horse as if you are doing something special (most of humans who have existed until this moments have been parents, nothing special about it) or a favor to the world.
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Cassie 8 years ago
The only time I have a problem with a child on a plane is if the adult responsible for the child is being a d**k, either by not doing something for or about the child or just being a bad adult in general. I was once on a flight where a woman put her kid in my husband's lap after take off and the kid just wallowed over my husband for the entire flight. On another flight, a young girl with a tablet watching movies without headphones kicked the back of my seat the whole flight. Mom was right there not saying a word to her child for poor behavior. I don't blame the kids. I blame crappy parents and I don't need a bag of candy to make up for it. Just be a good parent and most adults will understand when certain behaviors like a baby crying just can't be helped.
Polly Kocheva 8 years ago
I think planes should just have a separate sound-proof baby section.
Daniel Arendzen 8 years ago
Pffff "Goodiebags"... it's the first time I heard about it, now, here, seeing this post. Life is not facebook, life is not always to be liked, life is not fair. S**t happens. Just stepped out of a long haul plane and on both flights were crying babies and toddlers. Their mental capability and patience to what is happening to them is smaller than a nutshell and then blaming parents they don't have some form of "compensation"? Mass transport - the word itself self-explains it all already. For the kid itself it's no fun either, so instead of being self-centered looking at our own belly button self pitying that we have a horrible 12 hours (which is nothing relative to time at destination or before flying) we also can show compassion to the parents and the kid itself. Why don't all passengers bring goodiebags with them to give to crying toddlers/babies/their parents to say - hey, it's difficult for you too, here have some goodies for the kid, enjoy and make the best out of it!
Nana 8 years ago
Ever been on multiple flights 12h+ and had a screaming baby on it? I think the goodiebags are a nice way of telling people you know it's not such a pleasure and making them doesn't cost endless hours. For a two h flight I wouldn't care at all but anything that goes over 6h and includes constantly screaming babies is a strain.
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Amelie Lysell 8 years ago
I agree that they don't have to do it but it is a nice gesture to do. I got one during a ten hour flight and it made me a little happier and it can also serve as a warning that a child may be a little fuzzy. Else the child can just start screaming and it would annoy the passengers because they may not have known there was a baby with slight temper on board. With the bags, you get the hint maybe before the baby starts to cry. And if anyone says that I will understand when I have a kid.... Jokes on you. I don't want kids. A screaming baby on a plane may be one thing but I don't want to deal with one myself
Dominique Sinclair 8 years ago
I don't have kids, but I udnerstand that when babies cry it generally isn't their fault. They are....well babies...and they can't understand why their ears hurt, or help but cry when they can't sleep in this environment. My issue is always more with inconsiderate, often childless, adults around me on a plane. Why don't I get some sweets from the person in front ramming their chair into my shins? Or the person next to me who keeps their light on the entire flight, or the couple across the aisle talking so loudly I can't sleep? They are being just as inconsiderate, if not more because they should be able to control themselves and know better! But I don't get anything other than dirty looks from them!
Nicola Hermitage 8 years ago
Errrrrm, we all know sitting next to a screaming child is annoying. We all know that it's a likely event on a plane. Here's a thing though, if it's a likely event why aren't more adults packing their own bloody earplugs/ headphones. I don't see why that has to be the parents job to look after a full grown adult who should have been prepared in that eventuality.
IdilS 8 years ago
I've been in many flights where no earplugs/loud music could stop hearing a toddler screaming. No one's paying to be tortured for hours.
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Boss King 8 years ago
She needs to shut up. She's "filled with rage" whenever she reads about people doing something nice? Im "filled with rage" that she thinks people without children are morons expecting candy if they have to be around a child. She found something nice that someone did that has no effect on her in any way and gets offended and "filled with rage". How ridiculous.
Dan W 8 years ago
If people want to smoke, that's their choice, I have no problem with that at all. Stand next to me and blow smoke in my face? That's a slightly different issue. I don't see why I should be made to suffer for others people's life decisions. Equally I have no problem with babies on planes, but a little consideration shouldn't go a miss.
Sheralyn 8 years ago
Then don't travel. We're not obliged to put up with your baby crying either.
Sheralyn 8 years ago
That said, if you do HAVE to travel, I appreciate if you at least TRY to calm your crying baby and not just let him/her 'cry it out'. That would be the height of inconsideration. I'm fine if you at least try.
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Henry Winter 8 years ago
I think the goody bags are a great idea. I imagine that surrounding passengers would appreciate the gesture. Lady, you are your child are not entitled to disrupt the peace and space of others just because you elected to spawn. Get over yourself.
Emre 8 years ago
You people really don't get the point. You're stupid or the article was not able to make its point. Why are you feeling guilty because the baby is crying? Everyone was a baby and did this in someway. You shouldn't feel sorry if your baby can not tolerate your adult b******t...
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Vicky Downes 8 years ago
I recently had two young children (c4and6) traveling without parents seated next to me on the plane. It was a night flight and I was going straight into work. I asked to change seats as I knew I would be acting as babysitter for the whole flight and that's exactly what happened . I was exhausted the next day and fuming I had paid to be a babysitter. I totally understand baby's can't help it and would never ever have an issue with a baby crying on a day flight, but parents and airlines can be a little sensible - don't travel on a night flight when people want to sleep with a baby. Don't sit in business class with people who are traveling for work with a young child. Don't seat kids alone next to adults who effectively have to act as surrogate parents. And Finally if your child constantly kicks a chair or runs up the aisle screaming then for goodness sake tell them off don't just let them! Goodybags uneccessary but some sense and parental ability is still required!
Juan Alcorta 8 years ago
You can be all the understanding you want, but once travelling from L.A. to NYC, a crying baby made my life hell! I just wanted to jump off the plane.
Mindy Taylor 8 years ago
Trust me, that flight was a much worse hell for the parent.
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Elena Rogers 8 years ago
How about someone with a body odor or stomach complaint having to provide noseplugs to his fellow passengers in the event of gas or other smells? Someone with a cold providing face masks so other passengers don't catch their cold? Someone who snores loudly giving out these goody bags? Why is it only parents with babies who people expect to do this? I've had far more issues with adults being a******s than babies crying when I've travelled!
Aaron Bateman 8 years ago
Did anyone say they were "expected" do it? No. Booking travel, likely months ahead of time with a baby is quite a bit different than getting sick just before a flight. Also, last time I felt a bit of a stomach pain on the plane I gave up my seats near the front of the plane to move to the back where I would hopefully disturb less people if I did get sick. Luckily I didn't... and I am not going to feel bad about something I can't control, but again... I understand that I can put out a small amount of effort and it will mean a lot to those around me, so why not?
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.gas. 8 years ago
How 'bout we all just be respectful to each other, instead of getting "filled with rage?"
Deborah Riley 8 years ago
This is why we mostly drove when we traveled.......................Our screaming kids annoyed just us............
Henn Murilane 8 years ago
Hah, the author of this b******t is a typical moron who thinks that her children are so special and everyone should suffer and tolerate whatever het kids pull. I totally disagree, babies should not even be taken on planes as it is for them a traumatizing experience because of the inability to balance pressures inside head etc. I hope there will be either a law or special airline where parents like this cannto drag along their poor kids.
Bertha Garcia 8 years ago
I mean I understand the kid crying here and there. But if the child cries through out the whole ride than the parent is doing something wrong. Is not healthy for the child, or fair for the passengers. If you can't control your child's crying that you have spoiled the kid. Now I understand some kids may be sick and can't help it
Adela-Diana Almasi 8 years ago
One point about people being considerate, polite and nice to each other is reciprocity. We show empathy towards someone else - a hypothetically tired mom with a crying baby on a flight, and she also shows empathy towards us - fellow passengers who are now also annoyed in addition to being maybe tired or stressed. The problem when both the mom and us are only thinking about her problems and none of us about ours - as the article suggests - is that without reciprocity, this whole scenario is just not fair. And then the "argument" that people of all ages behave like horrible passengers - it's true! But why should that mean that we all get free tickets at being more selfish and less nice? The way I see it, we'd all be much better off with less inconsiderate passengers, not with more.
Alec 8 years ago
Do you owe the world a goodie bag? No. Would a pair of ear plugs for those around you be a nice touch? Most definitely. I mean, I remember spending eight hours on a transatlantic flight with a woman and her screaming baby. Of course, she had made sure she packed a pair of ear plugs... for herself.
Chris Gen 8 years ago
I once sat next to a lady travelling solo with her 6 month old son on a 13 hour and damn was she prepared, no goodie bags necessary! She was ready to give the baby a bottle during lift off and landing so that his ears didn't block, walked up and down the aisle with him when he got fidgety and fussy, took naps when the baby napped and had a whole bag full of playthings and snacks. I had no problem with holding hom occasionally when she needed to use the WC or getting up to take a jacket out of the overhead compartment for her. Consideration induces consideration.
Spock 8 years ago
Who wants a goodiebag anyway? I would rather see the parents flying with these little babies/children putting more effort in distracting, nurturing and giving love and attention to their kids... That is what is making the difference for your babies behavior! Everybody happy... (except maybe the selfish parents...)
Bunnies are better!! 8 years ago
I don't think it's necessary to hand out goody bags, especially when one is busy with a baby, however it's a kind gesture and I don't see any reason for this mother to be raged because of the consideration of other parents on board
Nyello 8 years ago
It's a nice gesture made by certain parents. Yet, no one is telling this woman that she absolutely must prepare goodie bags when she goes on a plane. It sounds like she is getting mad because these other parents are going above and beyond and it's making her feel like less of a person. That her problem. She needs to get over herself.
Dennis Hughes 8 years ago
So wait...because you're already stressed out about your child, it means I'm unreasonable to expect a reasonably quiet flight? No. If your child is likely to have a problem while flying, drive or take another form of transportation that won't be disruptive to others.
Jacquelyn Bierer 8 years ago
No, you don't have to apologize for having babies who act like babies. You only need to apologize for INFLICTING THEM on other people. DRIVE wherever you need to go when your children are this young. Anywhere they go at this age they are not going to remember anyhow, so you certainly don't need to be taking trips to other continents or places to which you cannot drive. This way your luggage all stays within your personal control as well. Done and done.
Rae 8 years ago
I'm pretty sure even though my son won't remember going to England when he was 6 months old, his great grandparents (who cannot fly, and may not be with us much longer) grandparents, and aunts and uncles were incredibly happy to be able to see him in person and not over a screen. But silly me, even though he slept the entire way I shouldn't have taken him because to risk him inconveniencing other people's lives for a short period of time was just a terrible social faux pas.
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Ruby Murphy 8 years ago
If you're letting someone else being nice and considerate to other people "fill you with rage," maybe that says more about you than it does about them.
Symon Riedstra 8 years ago
Babies of 14 weeks or 4 months old should not be flying in the first place. Of course they cry, not because they are scared (as if they have any notion of where they are) but because there ears must hurt like hell ! If travelling by plane cannot be avoided, then there is no reason that the ears of the neighbors also have to suffer, so some earplugs is just a nice gesture. Candies on the other hand is just plane ridiculous.
zenithorton 8 years ago
It is not acceptable when kids start crying and parents don't bother to calm down the kid. I am a mother and it makes me really upset to see babies, toddlers and even the grown up ones screaming their lungs out and the parents walking like nothing is happening.
Melina Pothier 8 years ago
I don't think you need to give gifts to make up for your screaming child, however, one should also not feel entitled to our unending patience with a child who is out of control. By that I do not mean infants, because you can't reason with them, but if a child that's a bit older is crying or kicking seats, that is not ok. Sometimes parents think everyone shoujd just deal with it because they have to, I believe in understanding the situation and being patient, but don't make it seem as though we should all be gracious enough to not be irked by a screaming child on a small airplane.
Sheralyn 8 years ago
One of the best and most reasonable comments here and more reasonable than some of my own. The top comment is along similar lines, pity yours came a bit late :) But I agree with you entirely.
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Marilee Kimball 8 years ago
I've always thought they should have a soundproof window and 3 rows for passengers with small children. You would know where the kids are sitting and it would be a relief to most parents and all the other passengers. Why isn't this a thing?!
Michal Koreň 8 years ago
If it's inevitable and necessary that you have to fly with a baby, then it's perfectly understandable and of course you don't have to apologize to anyone. But if you are flying with a baby to a vacation then OF COURSE YOU SHOULD BE SORRY! And not only to fellow passengers who have to suffer because of your self satisfaction and selfiness. But you should also be sorry to the baby!!! Because you are torturing it only for your own pleasure. Is it so hard to spend two or three years without a long distance vacation? I guess it's not...
Rafael Tiba 8 years ago
more on boredpand this week: "mom brutally pets her dog", "artist brutally travel the worlds to...", "you won't belive what this guy is doing brutally", "brutal brutality brutally makes people bruter", "brutally clickbaiting article..."
DaniellaG 8 years ago
It's true that hearing a baby cry during hours inside a plane is very annoying. But sadly is easy for babies to get affected inside
DaniellaG 8 years ago
a plane. They are mutiple reasons: " The timing of the flight may not suit the baby. It may be right in the middle of nap time, for instance. Even the food may not taste right. Perhaps baby is being offered a bottle, when he usually breast feeds. Or the bottle is a "ready-to-feed" disposable favored by parents on trips because it requires no refrigeration, but has an unfamiliar nipple. Depending on the reason for the trip, a baby's parents may be quite stressed. The trip may have been necessitated by an illness or death in the family. The parents may be parting for the length of the trip. There may be older children left behind or also on the plane and quite keyed up, requiring attention from the parents. All that excitement is conveyed subtly to the baby through parental body language. By the time babies can sit, crawl or walk, they are not used to being still. They want to do just that -- sit, crawl or walk -- to explore their surroundings. That's just not safe or practical on a crowded, speeding plane. They can't understand why they are being restrained. As if all the above were not enough, the pressure changes associated with changing altitudes make their ears hurt. Given all these possible discomforts, parents and other passengers should not wonder why babies cry on planes "
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Keshia Marie 8 years ago
I think God sits screaming babies next to me in public as his own personal form of birth control
Juan 8 years ago
Hello Steven.. Are we there yet? You seem to be rather aggressive? Been on an airplane lately? Well, i need to fly for work, not my choice. So what is your problem exactly? That i have a different point of view? I am whiny... Im just stating that i dont like the freedom of moms being turned into a flight on which i cant work because i get puked on, have my hair pulled by the brat behind me or just cant sleep because some r****d mom wants to see paris a d bring her 4 month old along
isabel bordón 8 years ago
Parents don't need to apologize for their crying babies BUT they should be aware of the discomfort a flight brings to them and therefore to the rest; and since it is entirely a parent's choice to put the baby and the rest in that unnecessary situation they should prevent what's not needed. Either flying with a baby or not adjusting their behaviour to the situation. I can't understand how she compares tuna smell with hours of weeping (sound that mother nature made specially uncomfortable for human ears so we would care for the baby).
Greg Solomon 8 years ago
I think this entitled woman needs to stay away from planes until her spawn are old enough to NOT CRY on the plane.
Lydia Gray 8 years ago
Annoyances come from all people, not just babies. There isn't an age limit on extreme annoyance... have you ever been seated next to someone who did not fit in their own seat, or who had intense body odor? Give me the screaming baby any day, please.
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Karen Fields 8 years ago
The older kid she had with her should NOT be behaving in such a manner. That would not be acceptable.
Olga Śmiełowska 8 years ago
never in my life have i expected a goodie bag from travelling parents. all i expect is for them to be good parents, which means looking after a bored toddler that constantly kicks my seat. and i do not see goodie bags as someone "being sorry for having a baby", but rather representation of someone being considerate, kind and thoughtful. parents should not feel pressured to give those to other passengers, but it's a really nice thing if they do it!
TD Walker 8 years ago
Maybe babies should not be brought on flights. They aren't allowed in concerts or plenty of other settings. They don't go to fine restaurants and can wait however many years it takes for them to be old enough to behave. Hire a sitter or place the baby with a family member if you have to travel by air. Consider renting a car with space for baby seats for distances that are drivable. Babies and small children sometimes SCREAM! That is as socially unacceptable as screams in a restaurant or concert hall. Once they can behave well, then they are able to do more and more. I know kids will be kids, but in public the parents should have control over them.
Rae 8 years ago
I don't understand why people such as yourself, likely flying in economy, are acting like you are flying for the lovely in-flight experience. The cramped seats, no legroom, the amazing fine dining, the sick people who don't cover their mouths when coughing, yes the babies... You fly to get from point a to point b. That's it.
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Barbara Myrter Ammon 8 years ago
Crying babies are, will be and have always been part of our human existence. We were all babies once, and someone undoubtedly put up with our crying. It's sad to see so much Impatience with babies on here. Typical of an increasingly spoiled society, filled with "cry-babies", complainers and whiners who can't cope with a few hours of a baby crying, but can blast bass music for hours on end, often into the night when your neighbor's are trying to sleep or at the beach, where some people would like to sit and relax calmly by the ocean. It's a cute gesture, but many young parents can't afford to make goody bags for a plane full of people and many young parents probably do not have the time to put together goody bags when preparing for a trip with baby. Patience and tolerance by we who are the "adults" is a much better solution. Babies don't know any better. We do.
Aunt Messy 8 years ago
The fact is that only YOU think your child is cute. I've had enough flights with kids running and screaming in the aisles (which is dangerous) and toddlers who deliberately cause trouble that their parents routinely ignore to think that you have some "right" to disturb my flight. I paid for my ticket, too. As to tiny infants....babies cry. That's just life. Usually the littlest once sleep through most of the trip.
Load More Replies... Smoky 8 years ago
I've never heard about these goodie bags, and I wouldn't want one. I don't understand how someone could take them and worse, expect them. A crying child is annoying, yes, but expecting something from strangers to be able to chill about something that isn't able to controll is just stupid and kind of selfish? Also if there are older kids who get a "goodie bag" could get it also wrong, if they start to think it is okay to get something from strangers. - or is it just me whose parents told me that I shouldn't take things from strangers?
Marcia Pennyworth 7 years ago
Omg, God forbid anyone acknowledge that a screaming baby on a flight is one of the most miserable things that happens when you're shoved into a tiny cold metal tube with a bunch of strangers at 30,000 feet. Did you know that the human ear is particularly sensitive to the exact frequency babies cry at? That's evolution ensuring that babies' cries are so piercing and uncomfortable we can't ignore them. It isn't simply unpleasant; it's painful. A smelly tuna sandwich doesn't disturb EVERYONE ON THE FLIGHT, nor does it cause physical discomfort. Damn those extremely thoughtful parents who understand that AIRPLANES are one of the worst places to bring a baby. Damn them! They're setting up unrealistic expectations that all the inconsiderate mothers and fathers of the world "shouldn't have to" live up to. FYI, nobody expects you to give people candy, but we do expect you to be apologetic about your screaming f*****g child. That is an objectively horrible thing for everyone in the cabin, a
Hollie 8 years ago
There's a bit of a difference between smelling a tuna sandwich, and having your screaming crotch fruit sitting next to you. Yes babies cry and scream, it's when parents don't do anything to sooth or calm baby that it becomes an issue. The bags are just a gesture, a bit of goodwill to say yes the baby may cry, we are going to do our best to stop it.
Heather O'Connor 8 years ago
Yeah and then folks complain that the baby is breastfeeding even tho the baby is quiet. Honestly, I'll take any screaming baby over some of these rather obnoxious adult toddlers.
Milena Bijma-de Oliveira Cardoso 8 years ago
How biased, bitter and typical of too much talk about nothing. I did it years ago and loved the good vibes I got back. Didn't do it because I felt obliged to and to make it even nicer my baby didn't cry at all. Get real, because you think it is "too much" I should be "aware of what Kind of expectations I am creating?"... when are people going to remember it is ok NOT to have an opinion about EVERYTHING. Don't wanna do it? Fine! Wanna do it? Also fine! And babies will be babies regardless, not the point at all.... get a life and let people be...
Konstantins Jaunzems 8 years ago
Flight math is simple: 1) If we sit together on the plane - we paid an equal price for that 2) If your seat is making my flight terrible than it is your fault, and i don't care if it's your baby or your tuna farts. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ At least earplugs could be a bit helpful for people who didn't expect flying with the siren besides they ears.
Jody Phillipe 8 years ago
It's obviously "all about this mom and her children"...someone should tell her it is NOT! We understand that babies will be babies. However it is an adult way of apologizing for a possible inconvenience before it happens.
Nina L 8 years ago
I understand your point and think you're particularly right. Of course anybody should feel guilty for their babies acting like babies. But the babies didn't decide to go in that plane - the parents did. Is it really necessary to go on a flight with a baby? I can imagine it's not much fun for them, neither for the ones around them nor the parents. So why do you go on a flight with a baby?
Rae 8 years ago
Because people have family and friends in other countries whom they love and want to see, because people may have dying family members they need to see, because people's lives don't end when they have children and are still allowed to go on holidays (yes, believe it or not even if said child won't remember it)
Load More Replies... Kevin S 8 years ago
Before i had a kid of my own i used to get annoyed when a baby cries out loud during a flight, but there's nothing we can do about it. Can't really tell the baby to shut up and i'm sure the parents already got their hands full trying to calm the baby down. Now i have a kid of my own, our first flight to the destination was very smooth, she was asleep for the whole flight. The flight home though was horrible, she cried for 1 whole hour. As a parent of course my main concern is the well being of my baby (guessing she was tired and can't sleep properly inside the plane), but i do feel bad for disturbing everyone around me! So we ended up standing all the way down the back on the stewardess' station because its far from everyone. These goodie bags, while its not mandatory, it is a very nice gesture. Kudos to all the parents who spend time, money and effort to prepare these!
Greg Solomon 8 years ago
I think this woman needs to keep her children off planes until they're old enough to NOT CRY.
Miyuki Nohara 8 years ago
candies for adult people to not nag about baby's ??? this is ridiculous.
The Granary 8 years ago
I find Valium helps in this scenario. I'd be happier to be handed that rather than sweets and crappy earplugs that don't block anything.
Kevin Krooss 8 years ago
Just scream back at the baby. Because adults can't be reasoned with either.
KT Pinto 7 years ago
Speaking as someone who has no kids and does not fine toddlers running up and down, screaming, or looking over their chair at you to be close to adorable, I wish they would have flights that were kid-free. Babies are going to cry, yes, but I don't see anything wrong with a parent preemptively apologizing for disturbing everyone else on the plane. At least it shows some consideration for those around them. As for the toddlers... why does my flight have to be disturbed because you don't know how to discipline your children? As for the having to carry diaper bags and such... boo. hoo. Welcome to having a child. Again, showing a little consideration for the people around you isn't so far out there, and saying that adults are rude too is just plain childish.
JamesRTK 7 years ago
And why is she filled with the rage because of others being considerate of others? Because she is just inconsiderate, rude (maybe cased by the fact that she is tired because of her own child's screams), and intolerant. She is basically showing us that she feels like an entitled .... woman. Entitled to my tolerance. No thank you. I would prefer the mother with crying baby all 11 hours of flight who would say 'sorry'. And I would just reassure her that I understand. And that's ok. Because it is really is. It's ok to have understanding towards others. It's ok to be considerate. And even if it brings me inconvenience, I would be ok. Because I know that the other person knows that. And it's very convenient, to know. ;).
JamesRTK 7 years ago
Giving something to the next sitting person is a sign that parents care about others. And by doing so they actually support the tolerance in others. It's not an obligation to do so. Neither to give anything, nor to tolerate. It's politeness. (it's also natural to be annoyed and bocome rude towards the source of annoyance. The question is if you would chose to do so. Or will you foster tolerance, respect, understanding.)
JamesRTK 7 years ago
I actually take babies as part of life, and that if parents took it on the flight, that's the only thing they could do. Because I would try to do things the way not to inconvenient others. I am considerate of others and expect the same from them. Though I understand not others are capable of this. So I have always with me active noice cancelling headphones, an additional set of batteries for headphones, earplugs in case I just want to change from headphones, sleeping mask (or if the flight is short, just sunglasses or my cap).
JamesRTK 7 years ago
She is filled with rage when people are considerate to others. So she has zero tolerance. And actually tolerance for seemingly good things like politeness and consideration. And she expects tolerance from us while sitting next to her and her annoyingly crying baby? That intolerant ...woman. (Of course she is free to think and say what she thinks is the truth. Just don't fly with me on the same plain. OK?)
JamesRTK 7 years ago
So she is filled with rage (RAGE!) for people being polite and considerate towards others. ----- So if I would be walking on the street, and accidentally bump into you, so that you would fall and spill your hot coffee on your brand new white blouse which you are wearing heading to an interview for you dream job. Then it would be ok for me to be filled with rage at you because you are expecting from me at least an apology for inconvenience. (By the way you should have watched where you are going = bought your ear plugs beforehand) ------ “If my child screams, it may annoy you. But there are a million ways adults can be equally annoying " And me accidentally bumping into you might annoy you. But there are many people who do bad, much worse, stuff to others (inflicting excruciating pain, doing human trafficking etc)...
Brianna Maginnis Zanoni 7 years ago
I understand that most parents do try to console their crying babies, I have one, and we were very prepared for the very few flights he has taken. The problem of upset babies only arises when the parents let them scream and carry on. When we actually brought our son for his 2nd plane trip, the family 4 rows ahead who had about a 6yr old and a 1 yr old, let them just carry on and scream and did nothing to try to console or quiet them. It was the worst, especially with having my own baby who was trying to sleep. Candy wouldn't have helped this situation, and I don't think it should be an automatic go-to. Raise your kids with love and discipline, they will be adults someday. Especially if your kid is 6. They understand what they should and shouldn't do.
Isaac Turner 7 years ago
Jesus Christ, can't people just be nice anymore? There is no rule/law/expectation that states that people with children on planes must hand out candy. However, there are some people who think that this is a nice thing to do to brighten up someone's flight. And that's all it is. No apologizing, no pandering, just a nice thing that people do.
Scott Crowe 8 years ago
Solution: Adult-only sections. End of argument. (would also work great in restaurants)
Kate Marešová 8 years ago
I don't see anything wrong with handing out earplugs and candies as a nice gesture. I get it babies cry, I am not usually that annoyed by that, but I see how it can be really nerve wrecking for some. However what bothers me the most... is it really necessary to travel with such a small baby? I bet it's not in most cases. It's not enjoyable for the passengers, but it's not enjoyable for the babies as well for sure. So when I see a screaming baby on board I am most likely to think 'what an a*****e parent for dragging their child on plane, can't they wait until the child is like 3 years old?'. So if they hand out these candies I can think they are at least a bit considerate.
Abby Duran 8 years ago
Am I the only one that realized that she just compared her child to a tuna sandwich as suffering?? That's just as bad as saying that you don't want to sit next to someone because they look different. As an avid passenger, letting your child misbehave or scream is just as equal to the adults who don't have an inside voice, watching your screen instead of their own, or don't get the hint that you don't want to have a conversation. It's the same situation within a restaurant or other public outing. I do agree with her that I'm NOT okay with bribing people with treats to make a valid point that kids are kids, whom you are responsible for.
Patricia Ross 8 years ago
It's a gesture of goodwill toward fellow travelers. Do if you want, don't do it if you don't want. No judgement here.
Steve Lawson 8 years ago
It think the problem, here, is that modernization has out paced evolution. The human body and human psyche haven't kept up with things like a pressurized airliner cabin. Back in the day, a baby could scream it's head off, and the open spaces would do a good job of absorbing the noise. Also, atmospheric pressure changes weren't so deep or rapid. And, because the spaces were wide and open, one could locate away from the disturbance. Since the only way to accelerate evolution is to, well, crank up natural selection, and since that's an implication to terrible to consider, perhaps the technology the needs to evolve. In other words, maybe there needs to be an examination of responsibility. When the jetliner was designed, human comfort and safety was considered, a line was drawn, likely influenced by concerns for profit margins. Perhaps the line was drawn too short. Perhaps it's up to the airlines to recognize and address this problem.
jack z 8 years ago
Everyone complaining about about babies on planes is a man/women child. How do you think the parents feel in these situations, it's a super stressful thing to go through but sometimes you have to get on a plane and go somwhere. We feel bad when our kids cry for other passengers, believe me we do. And the argument that nobody forced us to have kids is extremely juvenile. What if someone said that about your parents? You where a puking cry baby once too, and here you are all grown up and nor much has changed. We're forced to share the world with everyone else, life goes by a lot more smoothly when you try to empathize and understand that parents with babies aren't on planes to pass you off. Get over it.
Eulalie Grace 8 years ago
I don't have concerns about infants crying. The change in pressure can be terrible - I don't like it myself. All the flights we've taken have not had too many noisy babies. Babies cry. But I do take issue with people allowing their older children to shout, scream, play loudly, kick seats, have noisy video games. That is inconsideration at its worst. NO goodie bag can make up for that.
Melody Springer 8 years ago
I think it's a nice gesture. It really isn't enjoyable to have to suffer your baby. I don't have a baby myself, so I don't want to suffer yours. So the chocolate makes it much nicer. PS: How about you leave the baby at home next time you go on a trip? With germs and stress, I don't think planes and airports should be imposed on them either.
Rusty Long 8 years ago
Why don't airlines make sound proof and comfortable areas for parents and younger children?
Jewel Parks 8 years ago
It's called your HOUSE.. stay there if you can't control your kid!
Load More Replies... Spock 8 years ago
Who wants a goodiebag anyway? I would rather see the parents flying with these little babies/children putting more effort in distracting, nurturing and giving love and attention to their kids... That is what is making the difference for your babies behavior! Everybody happy... (except maybe the selfish parents...)... And when nothing works and your lovely baby just won't stop crying... then everybody else saw you putting in effort in trying and people would have much more understanding.
Susanna Vesna 8 years ago
Didn't even know this is a trend. I guess it is in US? Do they give a free therapist voucher with that too?
Yulia 8 years ago
I don't see what's wrong with parents acknowledging that their baby's crying might be hard to bear for the people sitting next to them, especially on a long flight. it doesn't mean they feel bad having the baby on the plane, it's just a considerate way of saying 'hey, I know you didn't choose to sit next to a crying baby, so here's a little treat as a way of acknowledging that I get it, and sorry it had to be you'. Of course it's not the baby's fault, or anyone's fault that the baby's crying. But how much nicer to have the parents acknowledge the discomfort of their neighbors, even though they can't do anything about it.
Marti Ondrésik 8 years ago
This is all cool, I do think too, that every person should be tolerant with kids and their parents without goody bags. However, a crying baby is unpleasant, and despite the best efforts of the parent will be annoying. My biggest problem in here is, that while parents with babies get to complain and fight for their rights on the flights, those with pets can not even take their 'babies' on board. I could assure everyone that my dog would be invisible, during the whole flight (just as he is on all trains), yet he is in the cargo, high on drugs and I am sitting for several hours wishing for his well-being i.e. no technical error in the cargo hold, failure of temperature/pressure etc. Pets are treated as items i.e. surfboards on flights. Things have to change about traveling with pets, people should have the rights to choose a 'baby-area' / 'pet-area' on board (if those would exist). I rather listen to other people's barking baby and knowing that my dog is doing fine.
Ashley Pekarske 8 years ago
My parents did nit take me or my sibling anywhere where we could annoy people because that's what considerate adults do. Don't like it? don't have kids. Everyone else shouldn't have to suffer because of your entitled decision to populate this overcrowded earth.
Aini Abd Jamil 8 years ago
I'm still okay with crying babies, but not okay with toddlers who shouts & screams, kicking the back of your chair the whole flight. If the parents can't teach their children to be respectful to others, then they should just - not travel. Or maybe they can be the adult here, take the responsibility and apologized for causing such an inconvenience - just like what these other parents are doing.
Mares Lejanos 8 years ago
I think planes or long distance buses, should contain a section "Family & Children", or the other way aroung "No kid under 5 years is allowed". The same way there is a smoker and no smoker sections, so the no smokers don't have to suffer and breath the contaminated air of smokers, there should be a not kid section, where people don't have to suffer the kids screaming. Anyway, it's not about babies, I can stand a hungry or annoyed baby. I can't stand todlers or older kids that keep shouting, running around and kicking the front sit all the time with the parents doing nothing at all.
Aryan Aryan 8 years ago
I'd like either a serious discount for sitting next to babies (and being reasonable about it) or for the airlines to sit all their +baby passengers in some area. personally, I'd rather sit with smokers even though I do not smoke myself. As an option I would be prepared to pay a bit extra for a baby-free flight.
Kat Weasel 8 years ago
Dear parents: I have extreme flatulence and will fart frequently, loudly and in a very smelly fashion during your flight. Kindly bring your own nose plugs and air fresheners. It's not my fault!
Smruti Rekha 8 years ago
She may be right in her own way. But being without a child doesn't mean other people are not stressed in their own lives. If there is a chance of adding to that by having a baby bawling all through the trip, a nice gesture goes a long way towards soothing other people. this is just plain being considerate. If you have babies, you are not doing the rest of the world a favour. You undertook the prams and bags and bottles when you stopped using a condom. That does not entitle you to expect other people to cheerfully hear your baby "act like a baby". If so, you should also be okay when people show their annoyance. Have had so much of this during every single trip !!!
Kimberly Mills 8 years ago
I dont think parents should feel obligated to do this. But to the parents who do, I think it is a nice gesture.
Samantha Manley 8 years ago
It's about letting people around you know that you are aware that this could be a problem. It's about respecting other people enough to let them know you are not one of those annoyingly smug people that think anything their baby does is perfectly fine. These are the same considerate people that will take a crying baby out of a restaurant or insure their kid doesn't run around trashing your house when they visit. The candy bags are a symbol of this. Of saying hey we're all in this together & thanking people in advance for their patience. I like them, I like the consideration of other people that they stand for. Hell right now I want to go out & give a big old chunk of the world a candy bag with a note in it to apologize for the temper tantrum the USA is about to have while they're stuck on the planet with the rest of us frantically shushing & trying to minimize the damage.
Lady of the Mountains 3 years ago
I feel like you shouldn't travel anywhere without ear plugs. even if it's not specifically for crying kids, you never know if you roommate will snore, cars will honk a lot, crickets will be loud, or a car's rumbling will be too noisy for your snoozes in the backseat. adults shouldn't need candy to be kept happy, and it's not a new parent's responsibility. I'm sure people closest to you would appreciate it if you had extra earplugs on hand in case they forgot, but the candy would just seem patronizing to me.
Sheila Confer 7 years ago
"Filled with rage" when you see these goodie bags? Sounds like something more serious going on there.
Wendy Hill 7 years ago
Sweet and thoughtful but I wouldn't want the parents to put themselves in a financial hardships to please the passengers. I would recommend to write a letter to the airliner to be aware their stress and toddlers moments as well. Hope they'll chip in the costs and find ways to please their consumers.
Shelley Pasini 7 years ago
just stay home with your screaming kids. Travelled from London to Alberta with one on our flight who screamed the ENTIRE way. Nothing could be more annoying. Maybe they should have special flights or sound proof sections for them. Why should other people be forced to endure such torture for hours. Even with my headphones on I could still hear it
Melissa Hawes 8 years ago
I'm pregnant with my first child and I'm hoping to visit my side of the family for the holidays this year or next, or both if I'm lucky. I've been on planes with crying babies and it doesn't bother me. What bothers me is the intolerance of babies from other people. Goes the same with breastfeeding in public. So what? If that's what the baby's crying for, then give it the boob. No big deal. Babies act like babies for a reason: because that's what they are for a while. If mine screams on a flight or anywhere in front of people, I wouldn't necessarily feel embarrassed by it, either. I'm one of those people whose heart breaks incredibly hard when I hear a child at any age crying. I just wanna pick them up and hold them. Anyway, this is ridiculous. To think that mothers and fathers ought to feel ashamed by handing out goody bags is preposterous. Honestly, grow up people.
Melissa Hawes 8 years ago
And if you're lucky, you might end up surrounded by other parents with their kids who feel what you feel at the time. Find another family on the flight you can talk to for suggestions if you are not sure what to try in terms of keeping your child happy and maybe, just maybe, quiet.😉😉
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Jewel Parks 8 years ago
If you are letting your kid scream on a plane, YOU are gonna need a goodie bag cause I'm gonna make your life hell. Stuff a sock in your crotch fruits mouth.
Priscilla Crow 8 years ago
I say no to the goodie bags. No way in hell in fact. I for one cant stand to hear babies or kids scream. It goes straight through me. And i have two girls. (grown now). And i would not expect someone to hand me ear plugs or goodie bags just because they have a baby with them. People need to be adults and be ready for anything and bring their own ear plugs. That is what's wrong with todays world. The ones who say yes to the goodie bags thinks people owe them something for having to deal. No. You have to be an adult and deal. Get over yourselves
Jennifer Proctor 8 years ago
I'll take a crying baby over an arm hogging, leg spreading, should know better adult any day of the week.
KokoTheKoala 8 years ago
Are these really necessary? Yes, the sound of a crying baby is somewhat irritating. But why in the world would one need to been given a "goodie" bag? When I was little, my mom told me to politely try to ignore it, or respectfully ask a child behind me to stop kicking my chair. But to have to be compensated and pacified with a treat is childish and petty.
Gill Tetlow 8 years ago
Why shouldn't a child get to see the world yes it's frustrating if they cry but bring your own damn ear plugs you be the prepared one adults are just as irritating if not more so and parents have enough to worry about making sure their child is safe without worrying about your entitled viewpoints of how they should treat your delicate sensibilities
José Alejandro Díaz Bravo 8 years ago
So it's a trend to feed adults with candys like they were babies because they can't bear the crying of an actual real baby... that's is SO mature....
Nyree Huh 8 years ago
And now explain to me why it's my fault that i paid to also be there and get my ear raped by a child you can not control? It's called common courtesy to at least consolidate your fellow travelers who are forced to hearing your kid scream for hours.
Bunnies are better!! 8 years ago
Dude, you were a baby once too, and I doubt YOUR parents gave people treats when YOU cried on trips
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Gehtdich Nixan 8 years ago
Parents with little children understand this posting and feel the same like this mom, people without children (mostly) don't understand it. Sometimes the world is easy. I had to fly for 9 hours with my nearly 2 year old son to visit my parents in law (before they pass away). Luckily he was enjoying the flight nearly the whole time or we have been able to keep him quiet. But it was stressful like hell. We try to flight only for few hours for holiday, but sometimes even 15 minutes are too much. Luckily noone complained so far, most people have been acting friendly.
Victor Vakaras 8 years ago
TL;DR "Babies cry, deal with it" This woman seems somewhat oblivious. At the same time, it's only a crying baby. With all the horrible things going on it's seemingly small potatoes in comparison. #firstworldproblems etc
Raven Mouse 8 years ago
I don't think the person who ranted in the article is a "pretentious parent" who doesn't lift a finger when her kids are making a fuss. Parents who do everything they can to quiet a child should be treated nicely. Yeah, a screaming kid sucks but sometimes, you know, parents kinda have to take their kids with them, across the world. These "goodie bags" are cute and all but what the hell did the passengers do to deserve them? Are the passengers attempting to calm an eighth-month old that's screaming because it has to burp or something? Nope. Parents do well enough to make the trip bearable for everyone. I'm sure the trip is even worse for the parents sitting inches from the screaming kid as opposed to you sitting a bit farther away. HOWEVER when parents DONT attempt to calm a child, ignore its crying, allow it to act out and are just real s**t parents in general than all this goes out the window. If their baby is screaming and the parent isn't claiming it then they shouldn't fly.
Lisette Callis 8 years ago
we live in australia and we travelled to singapore, then after two days onto greece and cyprus. and of course back again. we had a 3.5 yr old, a 14 month old and i was pregnant. we bought a ticket for the older one and were given a cot for the second. i don't recall any drama, and my husband has done thsame, other trips without me, once before with the first at 13 months, and since with all three a few times. obviously they got older and possibly easier. but we never had issues. i don't think anyone did. the kids were just happy to be going with daddy.
Theresa Brundage 8 years ago
It's really just one human considering the feelings of the humans around them. In a world where so many people couldn't care less about their fellow human, I find moments like this reaffirm my faith in humanity.
Karren Desgroseilliers 8 years ago
Maybe the airlines could just supply disposable earplugs? We pay enough for tickets I think they can supply them. This way its not on the parents to make everyone happy and people can use them if there is a screaming baby or not.
Doug Stringham 8 years ago
I don't get irritated with kids on planes. With the rare exception when parents let their kids be holy terrors and don't reign them in.
Paxi Sax Todd 8 years ago
Traveling with my twins was always hell. We had haters but thnkfly we had + ppl helping & attendants who gave booze disguised as coffee :)
endelbendel 8 years ago
Author is right. It's telling others what to feel and further imposing. Why not just breast feed them?
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Stille20 8 years ago
We need to stop shaming people for normal things, like their child fussing on a long flight. Adults have done far worse things on a plane. They get drunk, they invade your space, they talk incessantly, they remove too much clothing, they fail to practice adequate hygiene. When it's a child, they can't help themselves.
Emily James 8 years ago
I once sat next a rather large lady on a plane, who took over half my seat too...and then proceeded to peel and eat 3 boiled eggs!! Give me a screaming baby any day over that!
Not My Name 8 years ago
This is the 1st I've heard of these goodie bags. It's silly to think a mom should be obligated to give these to people as an apology. Any time I hear a child crying in public I don't really think much about it. It's all a part of life. If you're bothered by it get over yourself. They're not doing it to torture you. Hell it's not even about you. So get the hell over yourself.
Sadie Madrid 8 years ago
Agreed. Airplanes are still public transportation and babies are part of the public. I've never felt bad or apologized for my baby crying or my kids laughing loudly on an airplane. I had to sit next to a couple in the very back corner of the plane while they are bags of seaweed snacks and had the worst farts the entire trip! I've sat next to snoring men who sounded like snarling wolves and dudes with their head-phones on inches from my ears that barely muffled their blaring gangster rap. Where's my tootsie roll?!? Haha! Babies cry and if you don't like it, charter your own private plane.
Dora Tonksová 8 years ago
True. I don't have children, but I do have a little brother, and let me tell you, children are difficult. It is not the fault of the parent, many times, and mostly if the baby is just a toddler. You think it is horrible to listen to a "crying, shouting offspring"? Try being their parents. Being there every time they cry. The parents also feel bad, and oh god, a surprise - they are the closest to that child, and receive the loudest cries. They can't sit back and try to relax, try to not listen. They can't put headphones in. They HAVE to sit there and try to calm their child, and when the flight is over, they have to take them with them and all their stuff and care about their needs and... god, just one of the reasons I don't want children. Don't be d***s, just suffer through it, it's just a bit of noise.
Sylvia Hicks 8 years ago
I have more problems with adult passengers than with children of any age. I am a small female and those next to me believe this gives them license to take the armrest and to have their feet in front of me. When I flew with extended family, our concern was the adult men who thought it was okay to lean on and touch the preteens.
Nicholas Yu 8 years ago
First time I take my daughter flying, I'm making these candy bags for everyone around me...except they'll be gummy d***s from a sex shop? Can't stand that a baby is crying? Eat a d**k. Because at one point many years ago, YOU were that baby.
Susan Margetts 8 years ago
We all were babies once remember this.Plus I would happily listen to a young child cry than an obnoxious middle age man drinking copious amounts of red wine , sweating and doing his hygiene practises beside me.......
Adriana Pellegrini 8 years ago
Selfish people talking about what they are calling "selfie parents". Sad.
Jewel Parks 8 years ago
The most selfish is the parent who thinks their kid is more important than everyone else and should be allowed to make the world miserable.
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Rochelle Wadner 8 years ago
So basically if you have kids don't you dare venture into the outside world as you're not allowed to be a normal human being AND a parent. How dare you breathe the same air as the childless!! Take a holiday? How could you even contemplate such an idea now you have the spawn of satan?! How about the disabled? Are they allowed to be out there too? I mean they're annoying too aren't they? I mean some can't speak or walk, they must really slow you down. Autistic kids must really be the top of your list of annoyances, they get stressed by noise and too many sights and sometimes they make weird noises themselves. Tell you what, why don't we stop all procreation then we won't have those pesky kids or disabled people annoying you anymore. Or you could be an adult and just grow the hell up and look after yourself. Like another poster said, get some earplugs yourself or take an iPod with you, you know there's a high chance there will be kids on flights stop blaming other people and take control
Rae 8 years ago
Well, with the mentality of this lot we as well throw colored folk in that mix too and start segregating them again along with babies and parents.
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Loredana Cornea 8 years ago
What is this c**p I see everyone say: no one FORCED you to have a baby? That's right, I should't be forced to do the most wonderful thing a human beeing can do, give life. You have a baby because you like children, you love the idea of growing and forming an adult. Children and forced should never be used in the same sentence. And having kids isn't for everyone. You must be real pacient and tolerable and loving to have a child. So kudos to mothers everywhere! And by the way, you were all children once and probably were as annoying as these kids you can't stand.
Michelle Brideau 8 years ago
These are a terrible idea. I'm an adult with no kids but I understand babies can't be reasoned with and they might cry on a flight. I'm grownup enough not to need a goody bag to be pacified. I do have issues with parents who are oblivious to their children's ill behaviour and resent having to ask a child behind me to stop kicking my chair but I will, nicely, if I have to.
Daria B 8 years ago
I like your reply. It's rational, honest, unpretentious, practical. I wish I could upvote it to the top.
Load More Replies... LizzyM 8 years ago
It's not about apologizing for your baby acting like a baby, it's about being considerate to your fellow travellers who are stuck for hours in a small, crowded and confined space with your crying offspring.
Anisa Hadi 8 years ago
Yes it is the result... but I just think everybody paid the same amount of fee to purchase their ticket. So I find it rather unfair that some people get to sleep next to adults who are peaceful while some people have no choice but to tolerate next to screaming babies because they've got no absolute clue as to who they'll be seated next to when they picked their seats online. It takes two to tolerate, good adults wouldn't complain and would tolerate the best that they could when seated next to a crying baby although I can tell you that this isn't very easy at all! So as a parent, you could at least appreciate their tolerance. Yes I'd be annoyed If I get seated next to a baby but being an honest person, I would at least feel much more appreciated if the parents go the extra mile by handing ear plugs for example. I'd consider them respectful and well-prepared set of parents, and in return, this also improves my level of tolerance as a person.
Load More Replies... Stephanie Hutner 8 years ago
I see the point of this, but it doesn't change how I feel about screaming kids.Especially when the adult isn't doing a damn thing to calm it
Juan 8 years ago
Moms, you are right. You should not feel obliged to hand out goodiebags. You should probably just consider, if it is f*****g necessary to constantly fly around the world with your babies and annoy thw hell out of most people around you. And dont you pull the "im a mom and its so stressful.. My. Life is hell" - card. Nobody forced you to have babies. On my last business-flights i had at least 3, sometimes 16! Babies on the plane.. Most of them crying, which is understabdable. Nonetheless... Fuckn annoying.
Nyree Huh 8 years ago
I agree with you fully, I hate it when parents feel entitled because they have children or that makes them special somehow. No one forced you to have the kids so get off your high horse as if you are doing something special (most of humans who have existed until this moments have been parents, nothing special about it) or a favor to the world.
Load More Replies... Cassie 8 years ago
The only time I have a problem with a child on a plane is if the adult responsible for the child is being a d**k, either by not doing something for or about the child or just being a bad adult in general. I was once on a flight where a woman put her kid in my husband's lap after take off and the kid just wallowed over my husband for the entire flight. On another flight, a young girl with a tablet watching movies without headphones kicked the back of my seat the whole flight. Mom was right there not saying a word to her child for poor behavior. I don't blame the kids. I blame crappy parents and I don't need a bag of candy to make up for it. Just be a good parent and most adults will understand when certain behaviors like a baby crying just can't be helped.
Polly Kocheva 8 years ago
I think planes should just have a separate sound-proof baby section.
Daniel Arendzen 8 years ago
Pffff "Goodiebags"... it's the first time I heard about it, now, here, seeing this post. Life is not facebook, life is not always to be liked, life is not fair. S**t happens. Just stepped out of a long haul plane and on both flights were crying babies and toddlers. Their mental capability and patience to what is happening to them is smaller than a nutshell and then blaming parents they don't have some form of "compensation"? Mass transport - the word itself self-explains it all already. For the kid itself it's no fun either, so instead of being self-centered looking at our own belly button self pitying that we have a horrible 12 hours (which is nothing relative to time at destination or before flying) we also can show compassion to the parents and the kid itself. Why don't all passengers bring goodiebags with them to give to crying toddlers/babies/their parents to say - hey, it's difficult for you too, here have some goodies for the kid, enjoy and make the best out of it!
Nana 8 years ago
Ever been on multiple flights 12h+ and had a screaming baby on it? I think the goodiebags are a nice way of telling people you know it's not such a pleasure and making them doesn't cost endless hours. For a two h flight I wouldn't care at all but anything that goes over 6h and includes constantly screaming babies is a strain.
Load More Replies... Amelie Lysell 8 years ago
I agree that they don't have to do it but it is a nice gesture to do. I got one during a ten hour flight and it made me a little happier and it can also serve as a warning that a child may be a little fuzzy. Else the child can just start screaming and it would annoy the passengers because they may not have known there was a baby with slight temper on board. With the bags, you get the hint maybe before the baby starts to cry. And if anyone says that I will understand when I have a kid.... Jokes on you. I don't want kids. A screaming baby on a plane may be one thing but I don't want to deal with one myself
Dominique Sinclair 8 years ago
I don't have kids, but I udnerstand that when babies cry it generally isn't their fault. They are....well babies...and they can't understand why their ears hurt, or help but cry when they can't sleep in this environment. My issue is always more with inconsiderate, often childless, adults around me on a plane. Why don't I get some sweets from the person in front ramming their chair into my shins? Or the person next to me who keeps their light on the entire flight, or the couple across the aisle talking so loudly I can't sleep? They are being just as inconsiderate, if not more because they should be able to control themselves and know better! But I don't get anything other than dirty looks from them!
Nicola Hermitage 8 years ago
Errrrrm, we all know sitting next to a screaming child is annoying. We all know that it's a likely event on a plane. Here's a thing though, if it's a likely event why aren't more adults packing their own bloody earplugs/ headphones. I don't see why that has to be the parents job to look after a full grown adult who should have been prepared in that eventuality.
IdilS 8 years ago
I've been in many flights where no earplugs/loud music could stop hearing a toddler screaming. No one's paying to be tortured for hours.
Load More Replies... Boss King 8 years ago
She needs to shut up. She's "filled with rage" whenever she reads about people doing something nice? Im "filled with rage" that she thinks people without children are morons expecting candy if they have to be around a child. She found something nice that someone did that has no effect on her in any way and gets offended and "filled with rage". How ridiculous.
Dan W 8 years ago
If people want to smoke, that's their choice, I have no problem with that at all. Stand next to me and blow smoke in my face? That's a slightly different issue. I don't see why I should be made to suffer for others people's life decisions. Equally I have no problem with babies on planes, but a little consideration shouldn't go a miss.
Sheralyn 8 years ago
Then don't travel. We're not obliged to put up with your baby crying either.
Sheralyn 8 years ago
That said, if you do HAVE to travel, I appreciate if you at least TRY to calm your crying baby and not just let him/her 'cry it out'. That would be the height of inconsideration. I'm fine if you at least try.
Load More Replies... Henry Winter 8 years ago
I think the goody bags are a great idea. I imagine that surrounding passengers would appreciate the gesture. Lady, you are your child are not entitled to disrupt the peace and space of others just because you elected to spawn. Get over yourself.
Emre 8 years ago
You people really don't get the point. You're stupid or the article was not able to make its point. Why are you feeling guilty because the baby is crying? Everyone was a baby and did this in someway. You shouldn't feel sorry if your baby can not tolerate your adult b******t...
Load More Replies... Vicky Downes 8 years ago
I recently had two young children (c4and6) traveling without parents seated next to me on the plane. It was a night flight and I was going straight into work. I asked to change seats as I knew I would be acting as babysitter for the whole flight and that's exactly what happened . I was exhausted the next day and fuming I had paid to be a babysitter. I totally understand baby's can't help it and would never ever have an issue with a baby crying on a day flight, but parents and airlines can be a little sensible - don't travel on a night flight when people want to sleep with a baby. Don't sit in business class with people who are traveling for work with a young child. Don't seat kids alone next to adults who effectively have to act as surrogate parents. And Finally if your child constantly kicks a chair or runs up the aisle screaming then for goodness sake tell them off don't just let them! Goodybags uneccessary but some sense and parental ability is still required!
Juan Alcorta 8 years ago
You can be all the understanding you want, but once travelling from L.A. to NYC, a crying baby made my life hell! I just wanted to jump off the plane.
Mindy Taylor 8 years ago
Trust me, that flight was a much worse hell for the parent.
Load More Replies... Elena Rogers 8 years ago
How about someone with a body odor or stomach complaint having to provide noseplugs to his fellow passengers in the event of gas or other smells? Someone with a cold providing face masks so other passengers don't catch their cold? Someone who snores loudly giving out these goody bags? Why is it only parents with babies who people expect to do this? I've had far more issues with adults being a******s than babies crying when I've travelled!
Aaron Bateman 8 years ago
Did anyone say they were "expected" do it? No. Booking travel, likely months ahead of time with a baby is quite a bit different than getting sick just before a flight. Also, last time I felt a bit of a stomach pain on the plane I gave up my seats near the front of the plane to move to the back where I would hopefully disturb less people if I did get sick. Luckily I didn't... and I am not going to feel bad about something I can't control, but again... I understand that I can put out a small amount of effort and it will mean a lot to those around me, so why not?
Load More Replies... .gas. 8 years ago
How 'bout we all just be respectful to each other, instead of getting "filled with rage?"
Deborah Riley 8 years ago
This is why we mostly drove when we traveled.......................Our screaming kids annoyed just us............
Henn Murilane 8 years ago
Hah, the author of this b******t is a typical moron who thinks that her children are so special and everyone should suffer and tolerate whatever het kids pull. I totally disagree, babies should not even be taken on planes as it is for them a traumatizing experience because of the inability to balance pressures inside head etc. I hope there will be either a law or special airline where parents like this cannto drag along their poor kids.
Bertha Garcia 8 years ago
I mean I understand the kid crying here and there. But if the child cries through out the whole ride than the parent is doing something wrong. Is not healthy for the child, or fair for the passengers. If you can't control your child's crying that you have spoiled the kid. Now I understand some kids may be sick and can't help it
Adela-Diana Almasi 8 years ago
One point about people being considerate, polite and nice to each other is reciprocity. We show empathy towards someone else - a hypothetically tired mom with a crying baby on a flight, and she also shows empathy towards us - fellow passengers who are now also annoyed in addition to being maybe tired or stressed. The problem when both the mom and us are only thinking about her problems and none of us about ours - as the article suggests - is that without reciprocity, this whole scenario is just not fair. And then the "argument" that people of all ages behave like horrible passengers - it's true! But why should that mean that we all get free tickets at being more selfish and less nice? The way I see it, we'd all be much better off with less inconsiderate passengers, not with more.
Alec 8 years ago
Do you owe the world a goodie bag? No. Would a pair of ear plugs for those around you be a nice touch? Most definitely. I mean, I remember spending eight hours on a transatlantic flight with a woman and her screaming baby. Of course, she had made sure she packed a pair of ear plugs... for herself.
Chris Gen 8 years ago
I once sat next to a lady travelling solo with her 6 month old son on a 13 hour and damn was she prepared, no goodie bags necessary! She was ready to give the baby a bottle during lift off and landing so that his ears didn't block, walked up and down the aisle with him when he got fidgety and fussy, took naps when the baby napped and had a whole bag full of playthings and snacks. I had no problem with holding hom occasionally when she needed to use the WC or getting up to take a jacket out of the overhead compartment for her. Consideration induces consideration.
Spock 8 years ago
Who wants a goodiebag anyway? I would rather see the parents flying with these little babies/children putting more effort in distracting, nurturing and giving love and attention to their kids... That is what is making the difference for your babies behavior! Everybody happy... (except maybe the selfish parents...)
Bunnies are better!! 8 years ago
I don't think it's necessary to hand out goody bags, especially when one is busy with a baby, however it's a kind gesture and I don't see any reason for this mother to be raged because of the consideration of other parents on board
Nyello 8 years ago
It's a nice gesture made by certain parents. Yet, no one is telling this woman that she absolutely must prepare goodie bags when she goes on a plane. It sounds like she is getting mad because these other parents are going above and beyond and it's making her feel like less of a person. That her problem. She needs to get over herself.
Dennis Hughes 8 years ago
So wait...because you're already stressed out about your child, it means I'm unreasonable to expect a reasonably quiet flight? No. If your child is likely to have a problem while flying, drive or take another form of transportation that won't be disruptive to others.
Jacquelyn Bierer 8 years ago
No, you don't have to apologize for having babies who act like babies. You only need to apologize for INFLICTING THEM on other people. DRIVE wherever you need to go when your children are this young. Anywhere they go at this age they are not going to remember anyhow, so you certainly don't need to be taking trips to other continents or places to which you cannot drive. This way your luggage all stays within your personal control as well. Done and done.
Rae 8 years ago
I'm pretty sure even though my son won't remember going to England when he was 6 months old, his great grandparents (who cannot fly, and may not be with us much longer) grandparents, and aunts and uncles were incredibly happy to be able to see him in person and not over a screen. But silly me, even though he slept the entire way I shouldn't have taken him because to risk him inconveniencing other people's lives for a short period of time was just a terrible social faux pas.
Load More Replies... Ruby Murphy 8 years ago
If you're letting someone else being nice and considerate to other people "fill you with rage," maybe that says more about you than it does about them.
Symon Riedstra 8 years ago
Babies of 14 weeks or 4 months old should not be flying in the first place. Of course they cry, not because they are scared (as if they have any notion of where they are) but because there ears must hurt like hell ! If travelling by plane cannot be avoided, then there is no reason that the ears of the neighbors also have to suffer, so some earplugs is just a nice gesture. Candies on the other hand is just plane ridiculous.
zenithorton 8 years ago
It is not acceptable when kids start crying and parents don't bother to calm down the kid. I am a mother and it makes me really upset to see babies, toddlers and even the grown up ones screaming their lungs out and the parents walking like nothing is happening.
Melina Pothier 8 years ago
I don't think you need to give gifts to make up for your screaming child, however, one should also not feel entitled to our unending patience with a child who is out of control. By that I do not mean infants, because you can't reason with them, but if a child that's a bit older is crying or kicking seats, that is not ok. Sometimes parents think everyone shoujd just deal with it because they have to, I believe in understanding the situation and being patient, but don't make it seem as though we should all be gracious enough to not be irked by a screaming child on a small airplane.
Sheralyn 8 years ago
One of the best and most reasonable comments here and more reasonable than some of my own. The top comment is along similar lines, pity yours came a bit late :) But I agree with you entirely.
Load More Replies... Marilee Kimball 8 years ago
I've always thought they should have a soundproof window and 3 rows for passengers with small children. You would know where the kids are sitting and it would be a relief to most parents and all the other passengers. Why isn't this a thing?!
Michal Koreň 8 years ago
If it's inevitable and necessary that you have to fly with a baby, then it's perfectly understandable and of course you don't have to apologize to anyone. But if you are flying with a baby to a vacation then OF COURSE YOU SHOULD BE SORRY! And not only to fellow passengers who have to suffer because of your self satisfaction and selfiness. But you should also be sorry to the baby!!! Because you are torturing it only for your own pleasure. Is it so hard to spend two or three years without a long distance vacation? I guess it's not...
Rafael Tiba 8 years ago
more on boredpand this week: "mom brutally pets her dog", "artist brutally travel the worlds to...", "you won't belive what this guy is doing brutally", "brutal brutality brutally makes people bruter", "brutally clickbaiting article..."
DaniellaG 8 years ago
It's true that hearing a baby cry during hours inside a plane is very annoying. But sadly is easy for babies to get affected inside
DaniellaG 8 years ago
a plane. They are mutiple reasons: " The timing of the flight may not suit the baby. It may be right in the middle of nap time, for instance. Even the food may not taste right. Perhaps baby is being offered a bottle, when he usually breast feeds. Or the bottle is a "ready-to-feed" disposable favored by parents on trips because it requires no refrigeration, but has an unfamiliar nipple. Depending on the reason for the trip, a baby's parents may be quite stressed. The trip may have been necessitated by an illness or death in the family. The parents may be parting for the length of the trip. There may be older children left behind or also on the plane and quite keyed up, requiring attention from the parents. All that excitement is conveyed subtly to the baby through parental body language. By the time babies can sit, crawl or walk, they are not used to being still. They want to do just that -- sit, crawl or walk -- to explore their surroundings. That's just not safe or practical on a crowded, speeding plane. They can't understand why they are being restrained. As if all the above were not enough, the pressure changes associated with changing altitudes make their ears hurt. Given all these possible discomforts, parents and other passengers should not wonder why babies cry on planes "
Load More Replies... Keshia Marie 8 years ago
I think God sits screaming babies next to me in public as his own personal form of birth control
Juan 8 years ago
Hello Steven.. Are we there yet? You seem to be rather aggressive? Been on an airplane lately? Well, i need to fly for work, not my choice. So what is your problem exactly? That i have a different point of view? I am whiny... Im just stating that i dont like the freedom of moms being turned into a flight on which i cant work because i get puked on, have my hair pulled by the brat behind me or just cant sleep because some r****d mom wants to see paris a d bring her 4 month old along
isabel bordón 8 years ago
Parents don't need to apologize for their crying babies BUT they should be aware of the discomfort a flight brings to them and therefore to the rest; and since it is entirely a parent's choice to put the baby and the rest in that unnecessary situation they should prevent what's not needed. Either flying with a baby or not adjusting their behaviour to the situation. I can't understand how she compares tuna smell with hours of weeping (sound that mother nature made specially uncomfortable for human ears so we would care for the baby).
Greg Solomon 8 years ago
I think this entitled woman needs to stay away from planes until her spawn are old enough to NOT CRY on the plane.
Lydia Gray 8 years ago
Annoyances come from all people, not just babies. There isn't an age limit on extreme annoyance... have you ever been seated next to someone who did not fit in their own seat, or who had intense body odor? Give me the screaming baby any day, please.
Load More Replies... Karen Fields 8 years ago
The older kid she had with her should NOT be behaving in such a manner. That would not be acceptable.
Olga Śmiełowska 8 years ago
never in my life have i expected a goodie bag from travelling parents. all i expect is for them to be good parents, which means looking after a bored toddler that constantly kicks my seat. and i do not see goodie bags as someone "being sorry for having a baby", but rather representation of someone being considerate, kind and thoughtful. parents should not feel pressured to give those to other passengers, but it's a really nice thing if they do it!
TD Walker 8 years ago
Maybe babies should not be brought on flights. They aren't allowed in concerts or plenty of other settings. They don't go to fine restaurants and can wait however many years it takes for them to be old enough to behave. Hire a sitter or place the baby with a family member if you have to travel by air. Consider renting a car with space for baby seats for distances that are drivable. Babies and small children sometimes SCREAM! That is as socially unacceptable as screams in a restaurant or concert hall. Once they can behave well, then they are able to do more and more. I know kids will be kids, but in public the parents should have control over them.
Rae 8 years ago
I don't understand why people such as yourself, likely flying in economy, are acting like you are flying for the lovely in-flight experience. The cramped seats, no legroom, the amazing fine dining, the sick people who don't cover their mouths when coughing, yes the babies... You fly to get from point a to point b. That's it.
Load More Replies... Barbara Myrter Ammon 8 years ago
Crying babies are, will be and have always been part of our human existence. We were all babies once, and someone undoubtedly put up with our crying. It's sad to see so much Impatience with babies on here. Typical of an increasingly spoiled society, filled with "cry-babies", complainers and whiners who can't cope with a few hours of a baby crying, but can blast bass music for hours on end, often into the night when your neighbor's are trying to sleep or at the beach, where some people would like to sit and relax calmly by the ocean. It's a cute gesture, but many young parents can't afford to make goody bags for a plane full of people and many young parents probably do not have the time to put together goody bags when preparing for a trip with baby. Patience and tolerance by we who are the "adults" is a much better solution. Babies don't know any better. We do.
Aunt Messy 8 years ago
The fact is that only YOU think your child is cute. I've had enough flights with kids running and screaming in the aisles (which is dangerous) and toddlers who deliberately cause trouble that their parents routinely ignore to think that you have some "right" to disturb my flight. I paid for my ticket, too. As to tiny infants....babies cry. That's just life. Usually the littlest once sleep through most of the trip.
Load More Replies... Smoky 8 years ago
I've never heard about these goodie bags, and I wouldn't want one. I don't understand how someone could take them and worse, expect them. A crying child is annoying, yes, but expecting something from strangers to be able to chill about something that isn't able to controll is just stupid and kind of selfish? Also if there are older kids who get a "goodie bag" could get it also wrong, if they start to think it is okay to get something from strangers. - or is it just me whose parents told me that I shouldn't take things from strangers?
Marcia Pennyworth 7 years ago
Omg, God forbid anyone acknowledge that a screaming baby on a flight is one of the most miserable things that happens when you're shoved into a tiny cold metal tube with a bunch of strangers at 30,000 feet. Did you know that the human ear is particularly sensitive to the exact frequency babies cry at? That's evolution ensuring that babies' cries are so piercing and uncomfortable we can't ignore them. It isn't simply unpleasant; it's painful. A smelly tuna sandwich doesn't disturb EVERYONE ON THE FLIGHT, nor does it cause physical discomfort. Damn those extremely thoughtful parents who understand that AIRPLANES are one of the worst places to bring a baby. Damn them! They're setting up unrealistic expectations that all the inconsiderate mothers and fathers of the world "shouldn't have to" live up to. FYI, nobody expects you to give people candy, but we do expect you to be apologetic about your screaming f*****g child. That is an objectively horrible thing for everyone in the cabin, a
Hollie 8 years ago
There's a bit of a difference between smelling a tuna sandwich, and having your screaming crotch fruit sitting next to you. Yes babies cry and scream, it's when parents don't do anything to sooth or calm baby that it becomes an issue. The bags are just a gesture, a bit of goodwill to say yes the baby may cry, we are going to do our best to stop it.
Heather O'Connor 8 years ago
Yeah and then folks complain that the baby is breastfeeding even tho the baby is quiet. Honestly, I'll take any screaming baby over some of these rather obnoxious adult toddlers.
Milena Bijma-de Oliveira Cardoso 8 years ago
How biased, bitter and typical of too much talk about nothing. I did it years ago and loved the good vibes I got back. Didn't do it because I felt obliged to and to make it even nicer my baby didn't cry at all. Get real, because you think it is "too much" I should be "aware of what Kind of expectations I am creating?"... when are people going to remember it is ok NOT to have an opinion about EVERYTHING. Don't wanna do it? Fine! Wanna do it? Also fine! And babies will be babies regardless, not the point at all.... get a life and let people be...
Konstantins Jaunzems 8 years ago
Flight math is simple: 1) If we sit together on the plane - we paid an equal price for that 2) If your seat is making my flight terrible than it is your fault, and i don't care if it's your baby or your tuna farts. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ At least earplugs could be a bit helpful for people who didn't expect flying with the siren besides they ears.
Jody Phillipe 8 years ago
It's obviously "all about this mom and her children"...someone should tell her it is NOT! We understand that babies will be babies. However it is an adult way of apologizing for a possible inconvenience before it happens.
Nina L 8 years ago
I understand your point and think you're particularly right. Of course anybody should feel guilty for their babies acting like babies. But the babies didn't decide to go in that plane - the parents did. Is it really necessary to go on a flight with a baby? I can imagine it's not much fun for them, neither for the ones around them nor the parents. So why do you go on a flight with a baby?
Rae 8 years ago
Because people have family and friends in other countries whom they love and want to see, because people may have dying family members they need to see, because people's lives don't end when they have children and are still allowed to go on holidays (yes, believe it or not even if said child won't remember it)
Load More Replies... Kevin S 8 years ago
Before i had a kid of my own i used to get annoyed when a baby cries out loud during a flight, but there's nothing we can do about it. Can't really tell the baby to shut up and i'm sure the parents already got their hands full trying to calm the baby down. Now i have a kid of my own, our first flight to the destination was very smooth, she was asleep for the whole flight. The flight home though was horrible, she cried for 1 whole hour. As a parent of course my main concern is the well being of my baby (guessing she was tired and can't sleep properly inside the plane), but i do feel bad for disturbing everyone around me! So we ended up standing all the way down the back on the stewardess' station because its far from everyone. These goodie bags, while its not mandatory, it is a very nice gesture. Kudos to all the parents who spend time, money and effort to prepare these!
Greg Solomon 8 years ago
I think this woman needs to keep her children off planes until they're old enough to NOT CRY.
Miyuki Nohara 8 years ago
candies for adult people to not nag about baby's ??? this is ridiculous.
The Granary 8 years ago
I find Valium helps in this scenario. I'd be happier to be handed that rather than sweets and crappy earplugs that don't block anything.
Kevin Krooss 8 years ago
Just scream back at the baby. Because adults can't be reasoned with either.
KT Pinto 7 years ago
Speaking as someone who has no kids and does not fine toddlers running up and down, screaming, or looking over their chair at you to be close to adorable, I wish they would have flights that were kid-free. Babies are going to cry, yes, but I don't see anything wrong with a parent preemptively apologizing for disturbing everyone else on the plane. At least it shows some consideration for those around them. As for the toddlers... why does my flight have to be disturbed because you don't know how to discipline your children? As for the having to carry diaper bags and such... boo. hoo. Welcome to having a child. Again, showing a little consideration for the people around you isn't so far out there, and saying that adults are rude too is just plain childish.
JamesRTK 7 years ago
And why is she filled with the rage because of others being considerate of others? Because she is just inconsiderate, rude (maybe cased by the fact that she is tired because of her own child's screams), and intolerant. She is basically showing us that she feels like an entitled .... woman. Entitled to my tolerance. No thank you. I would prefer the mother with crying baby all 11 hours of flight who would say 'sorry'. And I would just reassure her that I understand. And that's ok. Because it is really is. It's ok to have understanding towards others. It's ok to be considerate. And even if it brings me inconvenience, I would be ok. Because I know that the other person knows that. And it's very convenient, to know. ;).
JamesRTK 7 years ago
Giving something to the next sitting person is a sign that parents care about others. And by doing so they actually support the tolerance in others. It's not an obligation to do so. Neither to give anything, nor to tolerate. It's politeness. (it's also natural to be annoyed and bocome rude towards the source of annoyance. The question is if you would chose to do so. Or will you foster tolerance, respect, understanding.)
JamesRTK 7 years ago
I actually take babies as part of life, and that if parents took it on the flight, that's the only thing they could do. Because I would try to do things the way not to inconvenient others. I am considerate of others and expect the same from them. Though I understand not others are capable of this. So I have always with me active noice cancelling headphones, an additional set of batteries for headphones, earplugs in case I just want to change from headphones, sleeping mask (or if the flight is short, just sunglasses or my cap).
JamesRTK 7 years ago
She is filled with rage when people are considerate to others. So she has zero tolerance. And actually tolerance for seemingly good things like politeness and consideration. And she expects tolerance from us while sitting next to her and her annoyingly crying baby? That intolerant ...woman. (Of course she is free to think and say what she thinks is the truth. Just don't fly with me on the same plain. OK?)
JamesRTK 7 years ago
So she is filled with rage (RAGE!) for people being polite and considerate towards others. ----- So if I would be walking on the street, and accidentally bump into you, so that you would fall and spill your hot coffee on your brand new white blouse which you are wearing heading to an interview for you dream job. Then it would be ok for me to be filled with rage at you because you are expecting from me at least an apology for inconvenience. (By the way you should have watched where you are going = bought your ear plugs beforehand) ------ “If my child screams, it may annoy you. But there are a million ways adults can be equally annoying " And me accidentally bumping into you might annoy you. But there are many people who do bad, much worse, stuff to others (inflicting excruciating pain, doing human trafficking etc)...
Brianna Maginnis Zanoni 7 years ago
I understand that most parents do try to console their crying babies, I have one, and we were very prepared for the very few flights he has taken. The problem of upset babies only arises when the parents let them scream and carry on. When we actually brought our son for his 2nd plane trip, the family 4 rows ahead who had about a 6yr old and a 1 yr old, let them just carry on and scream and did nothing to try to console or quiet them. It was the worst, especially with having my own baby who was trying to sleep. Candy wouldn't have helped this situation, and I don't think it should be an automatic go-to. Raise your kids with love and discipline, they will be adults someday. Especially if your kid is 6. They understand what they should and shouldn't do.
Isaac Turner 7 years ago
Jesus Christ, can't people just be nice anymore? There is no rule/law/expectation that states that people with children on planes must hand out candy. However, there are some people who think that this is a nice thing to do to brighten up someone's flight. And that's all it is. No apologizing, no pandering, just a nice thing that people do.
Scott Crowe 8 years ago
Solution: Adult-only sections. End of argument. (would also work great in restaurants)
Kate Marešová 8 years ago
I don't see anything wrong with handing out earplugs and candies as a nice gesture. I get it babies cry, I am not usually that annoyed by that, but I see how it can be really nerve wrecking for some. However what bothers me the most... is it really necessary to travel with such a small baby? I bet it's not in most cases. It's not enjoyable for the passengers, but it's not enjoyable for the babies as well for sure. So when I see a screaming baby on board I am most likely to think 'what an a*****e parent for dragging their child on plane, can't they wait until the child is like 3 years old?'. So if they hand out these candies I can think they are at least a bit considerate.
Abby Duran 8 years ago
Am I the only one that realized that she just compared her child to a tuna sandwich as suffering?? That's just as bad as saying that you don't want to sit next to someone because they look different. As an avid passenger, letting your child misbehave or scream is just as equal to the adults who don't have an inside voice, watching your screen instead of their own, or don't get the hint that you don't want to have a conversation. It's the same situation within a restaurant or other public outing. I do agree with her that I'm NOT okay with bribing people with treats to make a valid point that kids are kids, whom you are responsible for.
Patricia Ross 8 years ago
It's a gesture of goodwill toward fellow travelers. Do if you want, don't do it if you don't want. No judgement here.
Steve Lawson 8 years ago
It think the problem, here, is that modernization has out paced evolution. The human body and human psyche haven't kept up with things like a pressurized airliner cabin. Back in the day, a baby could scream it's head off, and the open spaces would do a good job of absorbing the noise. Also, atmospheric pressure changes weren't so deep or rapid. And, because the spaces were wide and open, one could locate away from the disturbance. Since the only way to accelerate evolution is to, well, crank up natural selection, and since that's an implication to terrible to consider, perhaps the technology the needs to evolve. In other words, maybe there needs to be an examination of responsibility. When the jetliner was designed, human comfort and safety was considered, a line was drawn, likely influenced by concerns for profit margins. Perhaps the line was drawn too short. Perhaps it's up to the airlines to recognize and address this problem.
jack z 8 years ago
Everyone complaining about about babies on planes is a man/women child. How do you think the parents feel in these situations, it's a super stressful thing to go through but sometimes you have to get on a plane and go somwhere. We feel bad when our kids cry for other passengers, believe me we do. And the argument that nobody forced us to have kids is extremely juvenile. What if someone said that about your parents? You where a puking cry baby once too, and here you are all grown up and nor much has changed. We're forced to share the world with everyone else, life goes by a lot more smoothly when you try to empathize and understand that parents with babies aren't on planes to pass you off. Get over it.
Eulalie Grace 8 years ago
I don't have concerns about infants crying. The change in pressure can be terrible - I don't like it myself. All the flights we've taken have not had too many noisy babies. Babies cry. But I do take issue with people allowing their older children to shout, scream, play loudly, kick seats, have noisy video games. That is inconsideration at its worst. NO goodie bag can make up for that.
Melody Springer 8 years ago
I think it's a nice gesture. It really isn't enjoyable to have to suffer your baby. I don't have a baby myself, so I don't want to suffer yours. So the chocolate makes it much nicer. PS: How about you leave the baby at home next time you go on a trip? With germs and stress, I don't think planes and airports should be imposed on them either.
Rusty Long 8 years ago
Why don't airlines make sound proof and comfortable areas for parents and younger children?
Jewel Parks 8 years ago
It's called your HOUSE.. stay there if you can't control your kid!
Load More Replies... Spock 8 years ago
Who wants a goodiebag anyway? I would rather see the parents flying with these little babies/children putting more effort in distracting, nurturing and giving love and attention to their kids... That is what is making the difference for your babies behavior! Everybody happy... (except maybe the selfish parents...)... And when nothing works and your lovely baby just won't stop crying... then everybody else saw you putting in effort in trying and people would have much more understanding.
Susanna Vesna 8 years ago
Didn't even know this is a trend. I guess it is in US? Do they give a free therapist voucher with that too?
Yulia 8 years ago
I don't see what's wrong with parents acknowledging that their baby's crying might be hard to bear for the people sitting next to them, especially on a long flight. it doesn't mean they feel bad having the baby on the plane, it's just a considerate way of saying 'hey, I know you didn't choose to sit next to a crying baby, so here's a little treat as a way of acknowledging that I get it, and sorry it had to be you'. Of course it's not the baby's fault, or anyone's fault that the baby's crying. But how much nicer to have the parents acknowledge the discomfort of their neighbors, even though they can't do anything about it.
Marti Ondrésik 8 years ago
This is all cool, I do think too, that every person should be tolerant with kids and their parents without goody bags. However, a crying baby is unpleasant, and despite the best efforts of the parent will be annoying. My biggest problem in here is, that while parents with babies get to complain and fight for their rights on the flights, those with pets can not even take their 'babies' on board. I could assure everyone that my dog would be invisible, during the whole flight (just as he is on all trains), yet he is in the cargo, high on drugs and I am sitting for several hours wishing for his well-being i.e. no technical error in the cargo hold, failure of temperature/pressure etc. Pets are treated as items i.e. surfboards on flights. Things have to change about traveling with pets, people should have the rights to choose a 'baby-area' / 'pet-area' on board (if those would exist). I rather listen to other people's barking baby and knowing that my dog is doing fine.
Ashley Pekarske 8 years ago
My parents did nit take me or my sibling anywhere where we could annoy people because that's what considerate adults do. Don't like it? don't have kids. Everyone else shouldn't have to suffer because of your entitled decision to populate this overcrowded earth.
Aini Abd Jamil 8 years ago
I'm still okay with crying babies, but not okay with toddlers who shouts & screams, kicking the back of your chair the whole flight. If the parents can't teach their children to be respectful to others, then they should just - not travel. Or maybe they can be the adult here, take the responsibility and apologized for causing such an inconvenience - just like what these other parents are doing.
Mares Lejanos 8 years ago
I think planes or long distance buses, should contain a section "Family & Children", or the other way aroung "No kid under 5 years is allowed". The same way there is a smoker and no smoker sections, so the no smokers don't have to suffer and breath the contaminated air of smokers, there should be a not kid section, where people don't have to suffer the kids screaming. Anyway, it's not about babies, I can stand a hungry or annoyed baby. I can't stand todlers or older kids that keep shouting, running around and kicking the front sit all the time with the parents doing nothing at all.
Aryan Aryan 8 years ago
I'd like either a serious discount for sitting next to babies (and being reasonable about it) or for the airlines to sit all their +baby passengers in some area. personally, I'd rather sit with smokers even though I do not smoke myself. As an option I would be prepared to pay a bit extra for a baby-free flight.
Kat Weasel 8 years ago
Dear parents: I have extreme flatulence and will fart frequently, loudly and in a very smelly fashion during your flight. Kindly bring your own nose plugs and air fresheners. It's not my fault!
Smruti Rekha 8 years ago
She may be right in her own way. But being without a child doesn't mean other people are not stressed in their own lives. If there is a chance of adding to that by having a baby bawling all through the trip, a nice gesture goes a long way towards soothing other people. this is just plain being considerate. If you have babies, you are not doing the rest of the world a favour. You undertook the prams and bags and bottles when you stopped using a condom. That does not entitle you to expect other people to cheerfully hear your baby "act like a baby". If so, you should also be okay when people show their annoyance. Have had so much of this during every single trip !!!
Kimberly Mills 8 years ago
I dont think parents should feel obligated to do this. But to the parents who do, I think it is a nice gesture.
Samantha Manley 8 years ago
It's about letting people around you know that you are aware that this could be a problem. It's about respecting other people enough to let them know you are not one of those annoyingly smug people that think anything their baby does is perfectly fine. These are the same considerate people that will take a crying baby out of a restaurant or insure their kid doesn't run around trashing your house when they visit. The candy bags are a symbol of this. Of saying hey we're all in this together & thanking people in advance for their patience. I like them, I like the consideration of other people that they stand for. Hell right now I want to go out & give a big old chunk of the world a candy bag with a note in it to apologize for the temper tantrum the USA is about to have while they're stuck on the planet with the rest of us frantically shushing & trying to minimize the damage.
Lady of the Mountains 3 years ago
I feel like you shouldn't travel anywhere without ear plugs. even if it's not specifically for crying kids, you never know if you roommate will snore, cars will honk a lot, crickets will be loud, or a car's rumbling will be too noisy for your snoozes in the backseat. adults shouldn't need candy to be kept happy, and it's not a new parent's responsibility. I'm sure people closest to you would appreciate it if you had extra earplugs on hand in case they forgot, but the candy would just seem patronizing to me.
Sheila Confer 7 years ago
"Filled with rage" when you see these goodie bags? Sounds like something more serious going on there.
Wendy Hill 7 years ago
Sweet and thoughtful but I wouldn't want the parents to put themselves in a financial hardships to please the passengers. I would recommend to write a letter to the airliner to be aware their stress and toddlers moments as well. Hope they'll chip in the costs and find ways to please their consumers.
Shelley Pasini 7 years ago
just stay home with your screaming kids. Travelled from London to Alberta with one on our flight who screamed the ENTIRE way. Nothing could be more annoying. Maybe they should have special flights or sound proof sections for them. Why should other people be forced to endure such torture for hours. Even with my headphones on I could still hear it
Melissa Hawes 8 years ago
I'm pregnant with my first child and I'm hoping to visit my side of the family for the holidays this year or next, or both if I'm lucky. I've been on planes with crying babies and it doesn't bother me. What bothers me is the intolerance of babies from other people. Goes the same with breastfeeding in public. So what? If that's what the baby's crying for, then give it the boob. No big deal. Babies act like babies for a reason: because that's what they are for a while. If mine screams on a flight or anywhere in front of people, I wouldn't necessarily feel embarrassed by it, either. I'm one of those people whose heart breaks incredibly hard when I hear a child at any age crying. I just wanna pick them up and hold them. Anyway, this is ridiculous. To think that mothers and fathers ought to feel ashamed by handing out goody bags is preposterous. Honestly, grow up people.
Melissa Hawes 8 years ago
And if you're lucky, you might end up surrounded by other parents with their kids who feel what you feel at the time. Find another family on the flight you can talk to for suggestions if you are not sure what to try in terms of keeping your child happy and maybe, just maybe, quiet.😉😉
Load More Replies... Jewel Parks 8 years ago
If you are letting your kid scream on a plane, YOU are gonna need a goodie bag cause I'm gonna make your life hell. Stuff a sock in your crotch fruits mouth.
Priscilla Crow 8 years ago
I say no to the goodie bags. No way in hell in fact. I for one cant stand to hear babies or kids scream. It goes straight through me. And i have two girls. (grown now). And i would not expect someone to hand me ear plugs or goodie bags just because they have a baby with them. People need to be adults and be ready for anything and bring their own ear plugs. That is what's wrong with todays world. The ones who say yes to the goodie bags thinks people owe them something for having to deal. No. You have to be an adult and deal. Get over yourselves
Jennifer Proctor 8 years ago
I'll take a crying baby over an arm hogging, leg spreading, should know better adult any day of the week.
KokoTheKoala 8 years ago
Are these really necessary? Yes, the sound of a crying baby is somewhat irritating. But why in the world would one need to been given a "goodie" bag? When I was little, my mom told me to politely try to ignore it, or respectfully ask a child behind me to stop kicking my chair. But to have to be compensated and pacified with a treat is childish and petty.
Gill Tetlow 8 years ago
Why shouldn't a child get to see the world yes it's frustrating if they cry but bring your own damn ear plugs you be the prepared one adults are just as irritating if not more so and parents have enough to worry about making sure their child is safe without worrying about your entitled viewpoints of how they should treat your delicate sensibilities
José Alejandro Díaz Bravo 8 years ago
So it's a trend to feed adults with candys like they were babies because they can't bear the crying of an actual real baby... that's is SO mature....
Nyree Huh 8 years ago
And now explain to me why it's my fault that i paid to also be there and get my ear raped by a child you can not control? It's called common courtesy to at least consolidate your fellow travelers who are forced to hearing your kid scream for hours.
Bunnies are better!! 8 years ago
Dude, you were a baby once too, and I doubt YOUR parents gave people treats when YOU cried on trips
Load More Replies... Gehtdich Nixan 8 years ago
Parents with little children understand this posting and feel the same like this mom, people without children (mostly) don't understand it. Sometimes the world is easy. I had to fly for 9 hours with my nearly 2 year old son to visit my parents in law (before they pass away). Luckily he was enjoying the flight nearly the whole time or we have been able to keep him quiet. But it was stressful like hell. We try to flight only for few hours for holiday, but sometimes even 15 minutes are too much. Luckily noone complained so far, most people have been acting friendly.
Victor Vakaras 8 years ago
TL;DR "Babies cry, deal with it" This woman seems somewhat oblivious. At the same time, it's only a crying baby. With all the horrible things going on it's seemingly small potatoes in comparison. #firstworldproblems etc
Raven Mouse 8 years ago
I don't think the person who ranted in the article is a "pretentious parent" who doesn't lift a finger when her kids are making a fuss. Parents who do everything they can to quiet a child should be treated nicely. Yeah, a screaming kid sucks but sometimes, you know, parents kinda have to take their kids with them, across the world. These "goodie bags" are cute and all but what the hell did the passengers do to deserve them? Are the passengers attempting to calm an eighth-month old that's screaming because it has to burp or something? Nope. Parents do well enough to make the trip bearable for everyone. I'm sure the trip is even worse for the parents sitting inches from the screaming kid as opposed to you sitting a bit farther away. HOWEVER when parents DONT attempt to calm a child, ignore its crying, allow it to act out and are just real s**t parents in general than all this goes out the window. If their baby is screaming and the parent isn't claiming it then they shouldn't fly.
Lisette Callis 8 years ago
we live in australia and we travelled to singapore, then after two days onto greece and cyprus. and of course back again. we had a 3.5 yr old, a 14 month old and i was pregnant. we bought a ticket for the older one and were given a cot for the second. i don't recall any drama, and my husband has done thsame, other trips without me, once before with the first at 13 months, and since with all three a few times. obviously they got older and possibly easier. but we never had issues. i don't think anyone did. the kids were just happy to be going with daddy.
Theresa Brundage 8 years ago
It's really just one human considering the feelings of the humans around them. In a world where so many people couldn't care less about their fellow human, I find moments like this reaffirm my faith in humanity.
Karren Desgroseilliers 8 years ago
Maybe the airlines could just supply disposable earplugs? We pay enough for tickets I think they can supply them. This way its not on the parents to make everyone happy and people can use them if there is a screaming baby or not.
Doug Stringham 8 years ago
I don't get irritated with kids on planes. With the rare exception when parents let their kids be holy terrors and don't reign them in.
Paxi Sax Todd 8 years ago
Traveling with my twins was always hell. We had haters but thnkfly we had + ppl helping & attendants who gave booze disguised as coffee :)
endelbendel 8 years ago
Author is right. It's telling others what to feel and further imposing. Why not just breast feed them?
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Stille20 8 years ago
We need to stop shaming people for normal things, like their child fussing on a long flight. Adults have done far worse things on a plane. They get drunk, they invade your space, they talk incessantly, they remove too much clothing, they fail to practice adequate hygiene. When it's a child, they can't help themselves.
Emily James 8 years ago
I once sat next a rather large lady on a plane, who took over half my seat too...and then proceeded to peel and eat 3 boiled eggs!! Give me a screaming baby any day over that!
Not My Name 8 years ago
This is the 1st I've heard of these goodie bags. It's silly to think a mom should be obligated to give these to people as an apology. Any time I hear a child crying in public I don't really think much about it. It's all a part of life. If you're bothered by it get over yourself. They're not doing it to torture you. Hell it's not even about you. So get the hell over yourself.
Sadie Madrid 8 years ago
Agreed. Airplanes are still public transportation and babies are part of the public. I've never felt bad or apologized for my baby crying or my kids laughing loudly on an airplane. I had to sit next to a couple in the very back corner of the plane while they are bags of seaweed snacks and had the worst farts the entire trip! I've sat next to snoring men who sounded like snarling wolves and dudes with their head-phones on inches from my ears that barely muffled their blaring gangster rap. Where's my tootsie roll?!? Haha! Babies cry and if you don't like it, charter your own private plane.
Dora Tonksová 8 years ago
True. I don't have children, but I do have a little brother, and let me tell you, children are difficult. It is not the fault of the parent, many times, and mostly if the baby is just a toddler. You think it is horrible to listen to a "crying, shouting offspring"? Try being their parents. Being there every time they cry. The parents also feel bad, and oh god, a surprise - they are the closest to that child, and receive the loudest cries. They can't sit back and try to relax, try to not listen. They can't put headphones in. They HAVE to sit there and try to calm their child, and when the flight is over, they have to take them with them and all their stuff and care about their needs and... god, just one of the reasons I don't want children. Don't be d***s, just suffer through it, it's just a bit of noise.
Sylvia Hicks 8 years ago
I have more problems with adult passengers than with children of any age. I am a small female and those next to me believe this gives them license to take the armrest and to have their feet in front of me. When I flew with extended family, our concern was the adult men who thought it was okay to lean on and touch the preteens.
Nicholas Yu 8 years ago
First time I take my daughter flying, I'm making these candy bags for everyone around me...except they'll be gummy d***s from a sex shop? Can't stand that a baby is crying? Eat a d**k. Because at one point many years ago, YOU were that baby.
Susan Margetts 8 years ago
We all were babies once remember this.Plus I would happily listen to a young child cry than an obnoxious middle age man drinking copious amounts of red wine , sweating and doing his hygiene practises beside me.......
Adriana Pellegrini 8 years ago
Selfish people talking about what they are calling "selfie parents". Sad.
Jewel Parks 8 years ago
The most selfish is the parent who thinks their kid is more important than everyone else and should be allowed to make the world miserable.
Load More Replies... Rochelle Wadner 8 years ago
So basically if you have kids don't you dare venture into the outside world as you're not allowed to be a normal human being AND a parent. How dare you breathe the same air as the childless!! Take a holiday? How could you even contemplate such an idea now you have the spawn of satan?! How about the disabled? Are they allowed to be out there too? I mean they're annoying too aren't they? I mean some can't speak or walk, they must really slow you down. Autistic kids must really be the top of your list of annoyances, they get stressed by noise and too many sights and sometimes they make weird noises themselves. Tell you what, why don't we stop all procreation then we won't have those pesky kids or disabled people annoying you anymore. Or you could be an adult and just grow the hell up and look after yourself. Like another poster said, get some earplugs yourself or take an iPod with you, you know there's a high chance there will be kids on flights stop blaming other people and take control
Rae 8 years ago
Well, with the mentality of this lot we as well throw colored folk in that mix too and start segregating them again along with babies and parents.
Load More Replies... Loredana Cornea 8 years ago
What is this c**p I see everyone say: no one FORCED you to have a baby? That's right, I should't be forced to do the most wonderful thing a human beeing can do, give life. You have a baby because you like children, you love the idea of growing and forming an adult. Children and forced should never be used in the same sentence. And having kids isn't for everyone. You must be real pacient and tolerable and loving to have a child. So kudos to mothers everywhere! And by the way, you were all children once and probably were as annoying as these kids you can't stand.
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