32YO Man Asks If He’s The Jerk For Making GF Do His Laundry And Withholding Groceries If She Stops
Cleanliness could very quickly become a deal-breaker in a relationship. If one partner isn’t taking care of their personal hygiene and is, for lack of a better word, stinky, it’s unpleasant for the other person to deal with. The worst part is if they don’t even understand why this is a problem.
A Redditor was confronted with the fact that his personal hygiene was not up to the mark when his girlfriend stopped washing his laundry with hers. He refused to believe it at first until commenters gave it to him straight.
Guy’s dirty underwear and terrible personal hygiene icks GF out, and she washes his clothes separately, he gets angry about it and says his mom would never have done that
Image credits: Drazen Zigic (not the actual photo)
The poster had been living with his girlfriend for 4 years, she’d do the laundry and housework alone, refusing his help because he didn’t wash his hands well
Image credits: RDNE Stock project (not the actual photo)
His GF then began washing their clothes separately because she felt his undergarments would “contaminate” hers, she also told him not to soil himself and to learn how to wash his hands
Image credits: Muhammad-Taha Ibrahim (not the actual photo)
He got annoyed at his GF, and told her that his mom, who did his laundry previously, never complained about his boxers being dirty
Image credits: RDNE Stock project (not the actual photo)
People were shocked by the man’s behavior and pleaded with him to do something about his crusty underwear and his hygiene
Image credits: Drazen Zigic (not the actual photo)
In an update, the poster said that he finally got a reality check and realized his GF’s point of view and that he was neglecting his hygiene
Image credits: aitaundie
The man stated that he felt like a new person after having done individual and couples’ counseling, working on his cleanliness, and exercising
The biggest thing this story highlights is that poor hygiene can really put a damper on a relationship. The man did not realize just how much his girlfriend had been struggling with his personal hygiene habits. She stopped him from doing chores because she felt he did not wash his hands well. She even cleaned his laundry separately because he would leave streaks on his underwear, and she did not want to dirty her clothes.
People don’t realize that bad hygiene can affect attraction and physical intimacy in relationships, and it can become a source of conflict over time. Both partners must figure out the root cause of this messy behavior and find a solution. It’s possible that couples could have differing opinions about how often to take a bath, how to shower correctly, or the best way to wash one’s hands. But, if the problem is severe and unpleasant, it needs to be resolved as soon as possible.
As shocking as it might seem, a poll of American men and women found that 91% of women find it important to wash their hands after using the toilet, compared to 84% of men. Around 61% of women believe that their personal hygiene is tied to their self-image, but only 50% of men believe the same. This shows that there’s quite a disparity in men’s and women’s beliefs about hygiene.
What the poster didn’t realize or probably understand at the time is why his girlfriend was fussing over his cleanliness habits so much. It’s because good hygiene isn’t just about attraction; it also impacts a person’s health and wellbeing. Such habits can protect a person from illness and infections, which is why it’s important to put in that basic effort to look after oneself.
Image credits: Burst (not the actual photo)
After people began commenting on the post and calling out the guy, he finally took stock of his actions. He initially accepted everything people had to say and then made a more positive update post. In the update, he shared how he had been lazy and depressed, and that had impacted his hygiene. He turned things around and started therapy with his girlfriend. It helped him realize that she was overworked with the household chores. He corrected his mistakes and even made physical changes, including working out and shaving.
Luckily, this guy was able to turn things around and repair his relationship. Unfortunately, this isn’t always the case. A sad but slightly hilarious concept exists among some toxic men, which is that self-care is feminine. They believe that washing your butt, cleaning your face, or looking after your skin isn’t masculine. But the truth is, more people should be like the OP and try to fix their basic hygiene.
Research has found that offices with primarily men have more bacteria in them than women’s offices. A doctor also found that men’s hands tend to have higher bacterial counts than women’s. This may be due to a higher sebum production, which is a fat excreted by the skin and a great place for germs to thrive. That’s one possible excuse that germy guys can use, but what about the men who willfully neglect their hygiene?
Barring mental health issues, men and women must look after their hygiene. Taking care of oneself will not only have a positive impact on you but also improve the quality of a relationship. This poster is living proof of that. Although netizens were initially grossed out by the man’s behavior, they were glad he had been proactive about his cleanliness for the sake of his girlfriend.
Folks encouraged him to stay on this positive path and were glad to read the update
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Why would someone be tasked with most of the household chores if they are working from home? I supposed you save time on the commute, but "all household chores" takes a lot more time than a commute should. I don't get it.
During covid, my wife was an essential worker, while I worked from home. I definitely got a lot of the chores done during my breaks and lunchtime, as well as before and after work when my wife was on her commute. It saved me from getting distracted by my TV or something, and it gave us more time together in the evenings. I didn't get everything done, but enough. Also, it depends on how long the commute is. I have a friend whose commute is 2hours. I think she's a bit crazy, but she has no problem with it.
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Why would someone be tasked with most of the household chores if they are working from home? I supposed you save time on the commute, but "all household chores" takes a lot more time than a commute should. I don't get it.
During covid, my wife was an essential worker, while I worked from home. I definitely got a lot of the chores done during my breaks and lunchtime, as well as before and after work when my wife was on her commute. It saved me from getting distracted by my TV or something, and it gave us more time together in the evenings. I didn't get everything done, but enough. Also, it depends on how long the commute is. I have a friend whose commute is 2hours. I think she's a bit crazy, but she has no problem with it.
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