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People Born Before 1980 Share The Struggles Of Their Age And Here Are 30 Of Them
Interview
Getting older comes with a whole host of challenges and changes that almost matches puberty in a way. But the truth is that many of us don’t really accept that we are aging until it’s staring us right in the face.
A netizen asked “What was the biggest change to getting older that was the hardest to accept?” and older folks shared their best stories. We also got in touch with the person who started the viral thread. So get comfortable as you scroll through, upvote your favorites and be sure to share your own thoughts below.
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#1
No matter how I work at it - eating right, exercising, etc. - my body can't keep up with my brain anymore. One damn thing or another is always on the fritz. Back feels great, finallllllyyyyy???? F**k you, says my right knee, try this on for size! (collapses)
Good times!
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#2
I'm not in vain, but I think it's incredibly difficult to lose your looks. Going from young vibrant looking to old and haggard. visually, you can see you're getting old, even though you don't feel old inside.
#3
Weight gain that I can’t lose no matter what I do.
Antony Aston 4 months ago
Been on a strict diet for the last three months. In the first few weeks I lost 30lb - not an ounce since.
#4
A few things come to mind. Lack of stamina. Good grief. I have been active for all my life, but now, even the simple gym routine wears me out. It bothers me each day that physical tasks take longer, I often ache afterwards, and the thought of breaking down bit by bit scares the stuffing out of me.
My never having been beautiful physically, you would think that not being noticed wouldn't bother me. It does. Getting the aid of a store clerk has become task. I find myself having to force myself on people. That's annoying.
The forgetting of names, proper nouns when I know those are words are somewhere in my brain just aggravates the stew out of me. Where did those words go? Hours later I will be loading the dishwaher and, damn, the name or book title will pop in head as though the brain kept searching for it long after I forgot I needed the name earlier. What's up with that?
Getting shorter. Freaking gravity. I was never tall and now I know that centimeter by centimeter I get closer to the ground. Argh.
Arthritis. All the activity, wear and tear on my joints as a young adult has come to haunt me. I have spent the last seven years doing resistance weight training to strengthen the muscles around the achy joints. Thank goodness I did, but nothing has helped stop the stiffening of joints.
Not being needed on some level. I spent so much time taking care of growing children, making professional decisions in my work life, coming up with solutions to make systems better and now I often feel hollow, useless. I want to know that I can help not just be a token.
Another sad thing concerns my decreasing lack of patience. I can no longer suffer the insufferable and wanton ignorance around me. I must walk away. Civil discourse disappears when grown a*s adults believe and repeat lies and conspiracies. That's not a debate, it's chaos. There's no deference to the expertise in our world. Retired insurance salespeople are not experts on geopolitics or macroeconomics. They just aren't. Ugh. For goodness sake, just shut up.
I must be cranky this morning. So I will shut up now.
#5
Having to let go of a dream or goal that will never be achieved. 😢.
#6
Decrease in stamina; why is everything so tiring now?
Skara Brae 4 months ago
Someone I know is in his 80s and has greatly reduced stamina. When he's resting he can get up and move around for a while. However, soon he has to move slowly and rest often. It turns out his aortic valve is mostly calcified. This means it doesn't open as far as it should. This means he can't replenish the oxygen in his blood fast enough when he's moving around. A heart surgeon measured his valve (everyone is different) and it should open as far as 4 square centimeters. Currently it can only open as far as 0.9 centimeters, so they are planning surgery.
#7
I have noticed a change in my short-term memory over the past several months and it's concerning me.
#9
Vision. Letters are too small on so many things. Glasses on. Glasses off. Where are my glasses? Bifocals.
#10
I’ve always had a cat (or two). After my previous boy passed, I went and adopted a bonded pair, because I’m getting *two* out of the shelter, right? But after a couple of years I came to realize that- if they stay healthy, they could easily outlive me and my husband (we are both 70). And then what happens? Everybody says, “Oh, provide for them in your will! Get a commitment from a friend or family member who can take them!”. What if you don’t have anyone who can take them?
Maybe we’ll be lucky and outlive them. Maybe my daughter halfway across the country (who currently has a cranky cat and two very energetic dogs) will have an opening. Maybe a cat-loving neighbor will still be living nearby. Maybe. 🥺🥺🥺 I worry about it.
Jeremy James 4 months ago
I used to volunteer at a sanctuary with over 700 cats. Many of them came from elderly folks in that exact situation.
#11
Going on Reddit and reading all the hate for Boomers. Apparently we are one giant evil monolithic hive-mind because we were born between 1946-1964. That’s all it took, just being born at a specific time. We’re like the Borg.
On the other hand, all the other generations consist of millions of individuals with different personalities and political viewpoints and different and individual hopes, dreams, hobbies, and interests.
Nils Skirnir 4 months ago
Blame the marketers and politicians for that. Divide, conquer, and sell c**p to
#12
Becoming invisible. No one tells you and then it’s too late.
#13
I used to have so much discipline. I could keep my weight down, exercise 7 times a week, keep my home organized, etc. Now I just want to eat gummies, Doritos and hang out here.
Bluonthefront 4 months ago
I'm ok with letting go of some things. Idc if my home and yard look photo ready. They look good enough. I spend my time on the things I enjoy more.
#14
Menopause... and all the s**t no one warned me about. Like losing your sex drive. ( which I've fortunately gotten back, somewhat).... or aging 10 yrs in 6 months. Waking up one morning to find I have NO eyebrows.... you know, s**t like that!
pipboo@live.co.uk 4 months ago
Me too! I see the age of 50 and the menopause as a huge watershed in my life. HRT has successfully removed all of the unpleasant medical symptoms, such as sweats, anxiety and insomnia, which allows me to keep working, so I'm very grateful. On the other hand I've metamorphised from an attractive and sexually active wonam in my 40's into a wrinkly, silver haired asexual old grannie in my 50's. And all that happened within a year, just bizarre!
#15
Realizing that the end is no longer over the horizon; it is the horizon.
Bat cat in a hat 4 months ago
I'm ok with that, better die sooner than suffer for years with some horrible degenerative illness
#16
That events/cultural references that you remember vividly are a lot older than you think, and in many cases, younger folks will have no idea what you are talking about.
keyboardtek 4 months ago
I saw the progressive rock group Emerson, Lake & Palmer when I was 17. One of the best concerts in my life. Young people today would not even have the attention span to listen to all the musical ideas in one ELP suite like Tarkus.
#17
I’ve been a personal trainer, marathoner, martial arts instructor, yoga teacher, …… since I was about 22. I’m 57. In my youthful, delusional mind, I truly thought I would be 80 before I started slowing down. Aging is humbling. We can exercise, eat right, and avoid most of the bad stuff. But, accidents happen. Genetics happen. Illness happens. I’m still very grateful that I have stayed fit and healthy through the years. But I was so sure I would be a marathon running grandma. Aging has checked my ego in a big way.
Auntriarch 4 months ago
I guess you would have been worse off if you hadn't started out fit. And at least you don't have my sister in law who is a marathon running grandma and she only started running just before COVID
#18
Not knowing who some “famous” people are. I look at the cover of People magazine when checking out at the supermarket and half the time don’t know who the people they are crowing about are, lol.
Jeremy James 4 months ago (edited)
I swear they keep making up new famous people and just expect us to play along.
#19
When you are younger it feels like you have all the time in the world to do things. I am now coming to terms with the fact that “someday” is a lot smaller of a window.
#20
Damned QR Codes for literally everything.
keyboardtek 4 months ago
Small print on all the grocery store items. Packages now have ten different fonts and sizes of fonts, and trying to focus on reading them when eyesight is getting worse everyday becomes very frustrating. Reading a magazine! Once the word processor was invented, idiots decided that every page has to use every font available in twenty different sizes with five extra boxes on every page in fourteen different colors. It lacks any level of symmetry, or visual sense of harmony.
#23
Singing well. I can’t hit high notes anymore and sometimes my voice is shaky and off key. I don’t sing in public, just in the car or at home, but it saddens me that no one will ever say “Wow! I didn’t know you could sing like that” ever again. 😒.
#24
Can’t wear high heels.
Auntriarch 4 months ago
Sigh, yes I have a fabulous pair of stilettos in the cupboard which I'm pretty certain I'll never wear again, I used to go shopping in them.... But I have gold birkies, so that's very consoling
#25
Dealing with heat & humidity; untrustworthy knees.
#26
Loss of ambition and drive. Part of me kind of likes it because deep down I'm just a bum but overall it's been tough to accept. Hard to describe but you reach a point of just feeling finished with it all and energy doesn't come easy anymore.
Unless I'm super stoked about something, I basically don't care about it and can't even force myself to pretend to care.
Irish Lassie 4 months ago
You’ve just described what millions of women go thru after menopause. You’ve also just described me to a T! It takes so much just to PRETEND to be interested, never mind being ACTUALLY interested. I choose naps over almost any other “activity”. The saddest part is that I used to be a gymnast and barrel racer (horses) and now I can barely muster the energy or strength to get out of bed. I believe it’s called depression. I envy those women who, at 60+, seem to be unfazed at all by age, injury or mental health issues. Thanks for passing that trait on to me, Mom! She’s 85 and has been depressed since I can remember. Go easy on us, children. You’ll soon be right where we are someday. 👵🏻👶🏻
#27
Not only hair growing out of new places that never had hair before but growing an inch over night.
#28
Realizing me and hubby can't just lift heavy objects like we did 20 years ago when we moved in. We're buying and putting together new furniture and deep calculations go into how we're going to get it up the stairs or room to room. Literally stuck with a very, very old bedroom set (hubby's grandma) we no longer can get downstairs to get rid of it. Will have to hire movers so we can get a new set.
Yeah, we're old asf. Hubby just turned 70 yesterday.
Insult to injury: I take him to a winery for his birthday/ We're sitting outside on a beautiful day sipping white wine and eating some cracker, hummus, and stuffed olives, and chatting (we use sign language) before going to dinner. A women is walking around and back and forth (I swear I caught her filming us while a video call she was on). At one point she passed by again and says, "You two are so cute. Sitting there just enjoying yourselves in the sun." I say thank you, but...
I'm thinking, so we've become that cute little old couple now??? WTF?! 😳.
#29
The hardest thing to understand as it's happening is that your circle of friends gradually grows smaller and smaller. They're still your friends and when you see them it's like old times. But the times you see them gradually decrease to almost never. And these people who were/are the most important people in your life for such a pivotal time in your life slowly begin to have other normal priorities - partners, families, work commitments, general adulting.
You grow up watching TV shows, seeing people in their 20s and 30s hanging out all the time, seeing each other daily, and you expect that to be your life. And it sort of is for a short time in real life. But the people pair up (normal), no longer need roommates (normal), get jobs in another city (normal), buy a house (normal), get married (normal), have kids (normal) and so on and so on.
This has been the hardest thing to accept.
keyboardtek 4 months ago
At 70 I have found making new friends is nearly impossible. As a male, if you start talking to other men you casually run into like at the pool or the gym and start small talk, they think you are gay and shut down conversation quickly. Plus so many oldsters have bad hearing and conversation is difficult.
#30
My life getting smaller. I used to travel but that is pretty much gone because my husband hates to travel and I have health issues that makes it hard for me to go by myself. I used to be a Global IT Project Manager flew off around the world now the grocery store is an adventure. My kids are grown and gone. Just not much life anymore. I do enjoy our community that keeps me going.
What do you think ?
wowbagger 4 months ago
A few months ago I started working at a fabric store where the staff and customers are almost all older women. At 53, I'm one of the youngsters. It has made me realize how biased I was against older women. At first, I was genuinely surprised by how much humor, energy, creativity, and even raunchiness I saw, which just goes to show how ignorant I was. I'm now feeling a lot more positive about my own aging. And, for what it's worth, we (older people) are not invisible to each other.
Papa 4 months ago
Getting older definitely has drawbacks, but it beats the alternative. There are also some good things about it. My wife and I have two adult children that we are proud of, and have good relations with. I had to buy two new tires for my tractor a few years ago. Those tires will probably outlast me, and should definitely last until I no longer need a tractor, so that's something I won't have to do again. I've cut back on my responsibilities, to give me more time to focus on my home and family.
Steve Hall 4 months ago
When I was a child, I couldn't wait until I became an adult. When I became an adult, I couldn't wait until I got old enough to retire. Now that I'm old, I can't wait for my second childhood to begin.
wowbagger 4 months ago
A few months ago I started working at a fabric store where the staff and customers are almost all older women. At 53, I'm one of the youngsters. It has made me realize how biased I was against older women. At first, I was genuinely surprised by how much humor, energy, creativity, and even raunchiness I saw, which just goes to show how ignorant I was. I'm now feeling a lot more positive about my own aging. And, for what it's worth, we (older people) are not invisible to each other.
Papa 4 months ago
Getting older definitely has drawbacks, but it beats the alternative. There are also some good things about it. My wife and I have two adult children that we are proud of, and have good relations with. I had to buy two new tires for my tractor a few years ago. Those tires will probably outlast me, and should definitely last until I no longer need a tractor, so that's something I won't have to do again. I've cut back on my responsibilities, to give me more time to focus on my home and family.
Steve Hall 4 months ago
When I was a child, I couldn't wait until I became an adult. When I became an adult, I couldn't wait until I got old enough to retire. Now that I'm old, I can't wait for my second childhood to begin.
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