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Just like in 2015 and 2016, women have been posting a fair share of hilarious tweets since 2017. Bored Panda has collected some of the funniest ones, and they will crack you up no matter what gender you are or how bad a day you're having.

From optimizing their shopping trips to figuring out their parents, the minds behind these hilarious tweets certainly know how to blend humor with insightful comments. Scroll down to check out why you still need a Twitter account and upvote your favorite jokes!

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    #3

    Funny Women Tweets

    jackiecarbajal Report

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    Kjorn
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    is this the snake from the 'Black' album from metallica? he's famous!!!

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    #12

    Funny Women Tweet

    _lucyppp Report

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    Johanna-Nicollette Kidd
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Im sure they have something wrong with those light, I feel human&then look in the mirrors when Im out,&I know Im a Martian! :((

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    #13

    Funny Women Tweets

    ifthehoefits Report

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    mulk
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yeah, or buy a big dildo in a transparent bag and take a picture of your husband's face!

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    #14

    Funny Women Tweets

    officialambrjoy Report

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    mulk
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Or an older one, who scream at you in an old and forgotten language! (F'tagn, Shub'Niggurate...!)

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    #15

    Funny Women Tweets

    alivingiano Report

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    Stille20
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    They even managed to work Phelps into discussions at the winter Olympics... though they spent a LOT of time on Lindsay Vonn... mostly trying to make her cry.

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    #16

    Funny Women Tweet

    aardvarsk Report

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    Daniel Mallory
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I wonder if that happens to other people or if it it happens to her often

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    #21

    Funny Women Tweets

    k3llytweets Report

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    Jilltdcatlady
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My hubs was in the National Guard and his group would practice recon in the S.C. swamps with 100% accuracy. Ask him to get old blankets and drop them off at Goodwill and he doesn't know where the spare closet is!

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    #30

    Funny Women Tweets

    otaaee Report

    #31

    Funny Women Tweets

    Iron_Spike Report

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    Louiiiise
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Honestly I didn't think I'd see it in my lifetime. Please make it last!

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    #36

    Funny Women Tweet

    girlontapas Report

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    Jilltdcatlady
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Google Earth... Hey, Look, the neighbors got a new puppy... Experienced Introvert.

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    #38

    Funny Women Tweets

    finah Report

    #40

    Funny Women Tweets

    laurdiy Report

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    Just Amiable
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    😂😨😂 Right above the dogs nose... His black marks are shaped like .. Nevermind, y'all will see it 😂

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    #41

    Funny Women Tweet

    allmenaintshit Report

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    Daria B
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    There are men who will be so sensitive that they'll emotionally accuse a woman of being too emotional and unstable.

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    #42

    Funny Women Tweet

    kellyblaus Report

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    Steve
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He was willing to THROW AWAY PIZZA for you? He's a keeper, then. Or mentally unstable.

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    #48

    Funny Women Tweets

    everywhereist Report

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    Kate Yeti
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Seriously, how hard is it to keep your hands to yourself? That's, like, 90% of what they teach in kindergarten.

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    #50

    Funny Women Tweet

    ShangHiiieee Report

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    Neeraj Jha
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    When she finds out abt it, her husband would actually be playing the game of Life and Death.

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    #51

    Funny Women Tweets

    morninggloria Report

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    Dawn Baik
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    literally just laughed out loud by myself at work - people are going to think i'm nuts

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    #59

    Funny Women Tweet

    JelianMercado Report

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    Chenoa Schott
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    They are so stingy with the samples that you get when you order online from Sephora. That is if you even recieve the samples lol

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    #60

    Funny Women Tweet

    allisonkollins Report

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    Jill Rhoads
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Not to mention that piece of a*s can be positive while half-a*s is negative. Saw that on 9-gag today: https://9gag.com/gag/aPjBNmB

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    #65

    Funny Women Tweets

    ziwe Report

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    Lina
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sorry, but I have to ask. How do you know someone is emotionally unavailable? That's a serious question, I have no idea (if they don't tell me, of course).

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    #66

    Funny Women Tweets

    maughammom Report

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    J Perry
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    In England they have a kind of cupcake that is called fairy cakes. Also a cute name for it a think😊

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    #69

    Funny Women Tweets

    nwalks Report

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    #71

    Funny Women Tweets

    aparnapkin Report

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    Emily Hisel
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    the idea of locker rooms sickens me. how can you say that? the nurse once took us in there to check us for scoliosis, and someone compared herself to a "fat cow"... :-(

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    #76

    Funny Women Tweets

    katewillett Report

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    Blue Cicada
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Or a man who roots for you the same way he roots for a professional team of athletes he's never going to meet in person.

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    #86

    Funny Women Tweet

    eiffeltyler Report

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    Ashley Say Wha?!?
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I wouldn't mind having a schedule like this, just take out the chain smoking.

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    #89

    Funny Women Tweets

    annadrezen Report

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    Master Markus
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I was going to mention Mel Gibson, but he got a new movie out recently, so what the f**k? I'm shocked that Tom Cruise is still working even though we have ALWAYS known he was part of a crazy sci-fi cult. However, Woody Allen doesn't make movies anymore, so...

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    #90

    Funny Women Tweet

    _ElizabethMay Report

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    Rafaella Bueno
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is actually something we should probably talk more about. Those guys probably spent their entire lives so far from childhood seeing bad examples of how to treat women and that's how they learned to behave. They don't think they're being disrespectful, it's what's normal and natural to them. Just saying "be more respectful" then won't help... gotta be much more specific about what can and can't be done and why. Sure it seems utterly obvious for us, but I at least like to think that a good amount of those men aren't being d***s on purpose.... they just honestly can't understand why the things they're doing are so wrong. Don't women also often have a hard time understanding that some things we think are "just how things are" are actually forced on us from birth by society? I needed a bunch of things explained to me.... let's give the guys some patience too.

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    #91

    Funny Women Tweet

    chescaleigh Report

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    anarkzie
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Not really, It would be like a friend of a serial killer saying "well he never killed me", same point just a better example.

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    #93

    Funny Women Tweets

    jillboard Report

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    Jesse Saving
    Community Member
    6 years ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    k. not a whole lot of people actually care about this. I mean really how many people on the world do you think are a part of the "Women above all else" feminists?

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    #94

    Funny Women Tweet

    diopter Report

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    Master Markus
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My phone keeps trying to make "f**k" into "duck". I don't think I've ever texted about ducks.

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    #99

    Funny Women Tweet

    alivingiano Report

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    Molly Tallmadge
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Women:equal pay! The world: theres actually a bored panda article on pointlessly gendered products.

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    #100

    Funny Women Tweet

    kbizzo30 Report

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    #105

    Funny Women Tweets

    hellolanemoore Report

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    Jamey Rand
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    God this makes me more sad then I truly want to admit...mainly because it's so true

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    #106

    Funny Women Tweet

    tarashoe Report

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    Emily Hisel
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    my father once said that if you get six shots of espresso with your coffee, you can see into the future...

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    #109

    Funny Women Tweet

    kenna_alitz Report

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    Stille20
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He's not a big picture kind of man, is he... also why would you lie about hating chicken

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    #111

    Funny Women Tweets

    gabydunn Report

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    Cecily C
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wait so not every blanket is an anxiety blanket. Dang, I've spent so much money on random blankets.

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    #112

    Funny Women Tweets

    KTHeaney Report

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    Debbie Andersson
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    No but really, people sitting on the machines at gym on their phones are one of the most infuriating things when you´re for once trying to get in shape, like b***h you´ve been sitting there for an hour doing nothing GET OFF.

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    #114

    Funny Women Tweets

    gleivytrain Report

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    Kimberly Banow
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If it's only $2, wouldn't you want to order 2 or more to make sure it's filling? :)

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    #118

    Funny Women Tweets

    tinatbh Report

    #119

    Funny Women Tweets

    Kendragarden Report

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    Emily Hisel
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    it's on my Pandora, (which, by the way, started with modern electronic pop but now has none!) and its now with me forever...

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    #120

    Funny Women Tweets

    ugh Report

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    Uriel Grey
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I figure mine was hit by a moose, train or has a really bad sense of direction... Lol

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    #121

    Funny Women Tweets

    kpfeffss Report

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    Emily Hisel
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    i dont want anyone but my dog in my life. we look out for each other in a way that no other dog human relationship ever did, does or could.

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    #122

    Funny Women Tweets

    adiiilaaa Report

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    Yvonne Blau
    Community Member
    6 years ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    so does this mean that your boyfriend is "rubbish", or you're a cleaning lady and have a relationship with your job...? more context?

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    #123

    Funny Women Tweets

    adult_mom Report

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    Cecily C
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ever bought a salad that was pre-packaged and somehow it tastes great, but even if you buy all the right ingredients and make it yourself somehow it's not filling and it's disgusting. Because My Life, I can't make salad

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    #132

    Funny Women Tweet

    ohpolly Report

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    Jamey Rand
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ok, I know this is a joke, but damn it people. Your time is not the only important thing.... Ugh, ok I just had to get that out....LOL I get the joke LMFAO

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    #135

    Funny Women Tweets

    brokeymcpoverty Report

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    Master Markus
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think the word you're looking for is "euphoric". I don't know. I get good feelings, but they're definitely not sex feelings.

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    #136

    Funny Women Tweets

    1followernodad Report

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    Lorraine R
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Also, when you carry tissues with you, and when you remember to pick up napkins in the cafeteria line.

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    #137

    Funny Women Tweets

    allmenaintshit Report

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    Emily Hisel
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    this is my most freaking favorite EVER!!!!!!!!!! also, is it crazy that im looking at the likes and such at the bottom at the screen and comparing them??? this one needs more upvotes!

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    #139

    Funny Women Tweets

    sapphicgeek Report

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    Dawn Luttrell
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Now that is exactly the kind of epic break-up I should have had with my ex. Just a simple, "I'm done with you. F**k off."

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    #143

    Funny Women Tweet

    AbbyHasIssues Report

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    Nikki D
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My body needs to learn that if you don't have anything nice to say, shut up.

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    #144

    Funny Women Tweet

    jessmisener Report

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    Tamara Sager
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And the men in the house just use the trash can as a giant game of Jenga.

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    #146

    Funny Women Tweets

    hellolanemoore Report

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    Uriel Grey
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Lol totally me! I am happy introverted hermit but. Likes the idea of Friends

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    #147

    Funny Women Tweets

    brokeymcpoverty Report

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    Emily Hisel
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    when life hands you med kits, get ready for a boss fight. meaning, its always too good to be true...

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    #148

    Funny Women Tweet

    aparnapkin Report

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    Nikki D
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I absolutely love flying if I have a window seat. Anywhere else is complete torture.

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    #150

    Funny Women Tweets

    BrotiGupta Report

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    Emily Hisel
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    when they tell you it's absolutely crazy important, but leave your mind to run wild on the details. !!!O_o!!!

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    #151

    Funny Women Tweets

    sashszn Report

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    Christine Piette
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Awwww, I guess that's cute. And also means they don't spend every waking moment sharing it on social media. Lol

    #152

    Funny Women Tweets

    farwzz Report

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    Emily Hisel
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    one year less until you die... i dont go around bragging about it, but if a subtle opportunity comes up during conversation with anyone, ill take it. i get excited too!

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    #153

    Funny Women Tweet

    collnsmith Report

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    arjelio mas
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Poor Jesse. Sarcastic comedy has left him in its dust, never to be seen again, probably.

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    #157

    Funny Women Tweets

    millselle Report

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    Femkje Stroop
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I guess because, just like my mom, your mom is unhappy in her life and tries to be in yours... she doesn't quite know how to be in it so tries to make you jealous, which only pisses you off even more... ? Close? Far off? Nailed it? 😅

    #160

    Funny Women Tweet

    _katehowe Report

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    #162

    Funny Women Tweets

    tressiemcphd Report

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    Nikki D
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Has telling someone to calm down EVER worked, even once, in all of history?

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    #164

    Funny Women Tweets

    lobster_hands Report

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    Jesse Saving
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    When ur friend invites you to hang out but you realise too late their other half is there and you're just a third wheel

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    #167

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    AbbyHasIssues Report

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    Anna Christina
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    or try my thing; carry around a backpack filled with plastic bags filled with plastig bags

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    #171

    Funny Women Tweet

    jillboard Report

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    #173

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    neonfiona Report

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    Just Amiable
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm the chick who lined up for Szechuan sauce 😂 Long live Rick & Morty

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    #179

    Funny Women Tweets

    AshleyFetters Report

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    #180

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    AnitaHelmet Report

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    Nikki D
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    At one point I had so many Amazon boxes thrown in my shed that when I opened the door there was an avalanche of boxes pouring out.

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    #181

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    SCbchbum Report

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    Lisa Shaw
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I had a MIL like this, she only brushed her teeth the day she going to see a dentist, which only happened every 10-12 years, she was in her early 50's and didn't know what dental floss or a douche were. She was floored when she walked in on me flossing my teeth, thought I had taken all the white thread out of her sewing basket!

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    #183

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    lizzie_scotford Report

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    #187

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    alyinas Report

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    ArtistclyAutistic
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Saaaaameee or when you feel like it changed you but its literally the same face that you hate.

    #188

    Funny Women Tweets

    quintabrunson Report

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    Sharon Voorhees
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I pretended to be with my sil & g'son on their European tour and they truly thought I was going senile or had alzheimer's. Couldn't take a joke from an older person!

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    #191

    Funny Women Tweets

    annetdonahue Report

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    Emily Hisel
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    thats me literally me right now... its fricking 11:30, and i need to sleep, but i must finish!

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    #193

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    alyssalimp Report

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    #195

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    girlposts Report

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    #197

    Funny Women Tweet

    GraceSpelman Report

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    #198

    Funny Women Tweet

    aparnapkin Report

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    Kip The Otter
    Community Member
    5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My dad used to say "They cost like fifty cents, they won't notice." *Slips pen in pocket* That is where 90% of our pens are from. The other 10% are the good pens we (the kids) aren't allowed to use because we will ruin them in 10 seconds flat and on total accident.

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    #199

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    aparnapkin Report

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    #207

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    _natalieray Report

    #208

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    notnice_Jenn Report

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    Panic!AtTheYeemo
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    i started laughing in the middle if math and people think im on more drugs than usual

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    #210

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    #226

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    Nikki D
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Honestly, I would have to get rid of most of my music if I considered who the artists were as people. Like, most groupies were underage.

    #232

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    Tomatoe
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I am way beyond that :) I don't look before 19:30, and then I don't care any more anyway :)

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    #236

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    Emily Hisel
    Community Member
    6 years ago

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    thats more and more often my mother...is she getting old???

    #239

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    Eliza Greenwood
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The movie and TV industries impossible beauty standards... She looks so young to regular people but her agent is saying she's old

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    D.S. Watson
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What I hate is when my man shows me a funny meme as if I didn't show him that exact same meme two weeks ago like, so it's not just listening you have a problem with?

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    #242

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    Rose Blutige
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Stop cramming things into yourself that weren't meant to be in those particular orifaces O.o

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    #245

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    #256

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    Nikki D
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    One time my neighbor caught me staring at his grilled pork chops so he offered me one. I ate it with my hands!

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    Just Carmen
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is me and my girlfriend. But we usually end up talking another 2 hours before we finally hang up.

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    #259

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    floof lover
    Community Member
    6 years ago

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    Why not just women? There are plenty of other groups that need more residentsrepresentation

    #261

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    #267

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    Emily Hisel
    Community Member
    6 years ago

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    har har... and what do you think happens there!? committed.

    #272

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    Krishna Vishwas
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I like the way Abe is looking at trump.. it's like oh you special dumbfuck

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    Diane Lloyd
    Community Member
    6 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Thank you. I now have one of my favorite songs going around in my head. Loved it so much it used to be the wake up song on my alarm clock. Retired now...alarm clock donated.

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