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While you scroll through an eternity of your Twitter feed, it’s easy to get lost in anything from politics to societal problems, have your temperature soar and your mood drop on a day that otherwise was perfectly if not fine, then okay-ish.

So it’s no secret that on some occasions, we all benefit from more light-hearted content avoiding all the heated discussions on trending threads as if you were playing Minesweeper.

Luckily, there’s a subreddit dedicated to precisely this. Titled “NonPoliticalTwitter,” it celebrates Twitter posts that are politics-free and have some vibes instead. “Come vibe with us,” the page’s description says and 73.8k members have already signed up for it. So what do you get? A hilariously accurate selection of the best tweets for anyone from a weird sense of humor to a more pragmatic attitude towards life.

#1

Now, This Sounds Like A Story

Now, This Sounds Like A Story

sangriya Report

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Yettichild
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Teens are easy to brainwash into believing they are the chosen one. Btw the Lost Lands series of games by 5 BN games has a non teen heroine. The first game has her rescue her son.

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It’s no secret that Twitter is the unofficial home of many online comedians who share those little bursts of life, whether it’s a joke or pun, an observation or opinionated post. Part of Twitter’s appeal has to do with how user-friendly the platform really is since every tweet there only takes a few sentences.

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    #3

    Clever

    Clever

    MGigger Report

    It's sort of like a Facebook status, but it's public, so the audience is different. If you want to reach an audience beyond your closest circle of followers, it's important to post things that have broader appeal. And because Twitter’s audience is so vast and diverse, you get to participate in conversations (or threads) about nearly every little thing that happens in the world.

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    #5

    I Mean, He's Not Wrong...

    I Mean, He's Not Wrong...

    _kylebrownlee Report

    #6

    Biggest Mistake Of Her Life

    Biggest Mistake Of Her Life

    hwhouston517 Report

    #7

    Bread Is God

    Bread Is God

    hwhouston517 Report

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    Shishal Asaurus
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The accuracy of this post hits me deep in my soul. I thought i was the only one that did this.

    James016
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sometimes the toast comes out just right and the butter doesn't completely melt away and it is divine.

    Nadine Bamberger
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wait until you've tried real bread, with a crust, you'll be in taste bud heaven.

    Randolph Croft
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sometimes a loaf from a real bakery is too good to pass up and I eat the whole damn thing like a ravenous beast.

    Terry Tobias
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Omg yes! I have an addiction to fresh bread and just the smell of a nice, warm loaf makes me very happy! One day when I was a kid, my grandmother and I bought some fresh bread for the whole family. The first place we went was my cousins house. Unfortunately, they weren't home. As we sat in their driveway debating what to do, the smell of the bread overcame us... we ate that warm loaf, tearing hunks of it off with our bare hands... and life was good. (Sigh)

    Vicky Zar
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Similar story: my sister (aged about 10 then) went to get 3 fresh breads from the bakery and came back with 1.5

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    ravina nimje
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I tried starting Keto and the only food I can think of Toast and butter. No wonder I'm still the same size.

    Pangolin Pal
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    OMG, yes - and multiply this by a bazillion when you're talking about fresh-baked bread right out of the oven with butter. I would seriously eat it until I passed out. Nothing like it!

    Niaxa King
    Community Member
    3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yes yes. Salted Butter shavings just out of the fridge mmmmm

    A weird cat
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That "occasional phase" is literally everyday for me. My bread and butter is bread and butter

    Id row
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I do that with cinnamon toast every few years. I just get a craving out of nowhere and make 4 slices.

    Yvette Desmarais
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Last night I had four slices. Two w butter. Two w home made maple blueberry jam. Yum!

    Nancy Mac
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Now that I'm retired, I just recently started doing this again! I have more time to make meals, but too lazy to do it. Will sit on front of TV with four slices of bread, plain, and butter. Crazy!

    Robin Rush
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My daughter does not restrain this desire! She’s lucky she’s young. (She actually does eat very well but occasionally she just has a craving, and it’s usually bread! She’d be screwed if she ever developed celiac disease)

    Dianne Forst
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I’m in that phase right now, but hold it to one piece. It’s a pretty big piece though…

    Kimberley Gayle Thomas
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    😨Not that bad, but I do have cravings for Grilled Cheese Sandwiches sometimes. It's worse when I don't have the bread available.😪

    Faith Nicole
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Occasionally I do that to but put cinnamon sugar on top, then half a loaf is gone

    okpkpkp
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    sourdough toast with butter, peanut butter, and a splash of honey are what I do now. sourdough is denser than most white bread and the peanut butter turns into warm lava. so good.

    Pantea
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Not toast, but good German buns or bretzel. You really don't need anything else but butter :)

    Vicky Zar
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Fun Fact: in the US Toast is the name of toasted bread. In Germany Toast is the name of that squishy white US bread. If we say bread, we usually mean normal bread like Bauernbrot or Steinofenbrot but never that white stuff. If we mean the white stuff we will always say Toast.

    Renard Bansale
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Finished nearly a full loaf of bread the first time my family and I bought Nutella.

    Just a girl in a crazy world
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This happens every time I watch Harry Potter and the half blood prince. That one line, the one where Harry says “it’s like a wizards bread and butter” and then I ALWAYS get up and go make bread and butter.

    Jessica Dingle
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    When I was pregnant with my second kiddo, I constantly craved French bread and butter. When I was at work one day, my dad was nearby and I asked him to bring some by since my spouse was to far away. My dad obliged, I engourded on that heaven, and i couldn't stomach French bread and butter for months afterwards.... to much of a good thing.

    Christine
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The real question is, who is the one person who does NOT do this?

    Sarah
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I got to live vicariously today, watching my bf make delicious buttered sourdough toast. Dang, that looked so good! I can no longer eat wheat or dairy, so I'll never be able to have buttered sourdough toast again, but yeah...if I suddenly, magically, could have? I'd have eaten the rest of that loaf.

    Vicky Zar
    Community Member
    3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Fresh coarse rye bread or stone baked bread.... I don't even need butter for that. German bread is part of the Unesco intangible cultural heritage.

    Duncan
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    i am in that phase now. Also never stopped the tomato sauce on everything phase.

    InfectedVoice
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Toast and hot chocolate, can't get enough for a few days then won't bother for a few weeks.

    v
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sometimes the planets line up and you've got good bread, good butter and good jelly. The only thing that can be done is to do what needs to be done.

    Forrest McCanless
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yes! My wife's home-made bread and orange marmalade from Trader Joe's!

    little queerling
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Bread is the cause of my existance. Butter just makes everything better.

    Mrs. Mir
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I literally ate 5 English muffins with loads of butter yesterday. I made myself one. Then was like, I definitely need 2 more. And I obviously had to finish off the bag so I ate the last 2. Now I’m sitting here feeling so sorry for myself because I’m so overweight I look pregnant but ITS MY OWN FAULT. Well, and the damned bread’s too lol

    Nikki Sevven
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    When I was a kid and was sick, my dad would make me tomato soup with buttered toast pieces. It's still my go to sick meal 50 years later.

    Vetus Vespertilio
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sometimes when I bake bread my husband and I have bread and butter and cheese for dinner. Shhhhh!

    Ann Pattinson
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Who needs a topping?! Just the loaf of bread does me. And don't start me on bagels.

    Mimi M
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It ain't just you. Sometimes I give up on a regular meal and just have toast and butter (and sometimes jam) for dinner.

    Mazer
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I am not certain whether to curse you for even mentioning this or raise my buttered toast to you in celebration of kindred tastes

    Danielle Renee
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    i will go through a week of toast and butter cravings and then not want it for months

    Jace
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Carb and fat craving made harder by liking crunch combined with soft.

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    In 2017, Twitter conducted a multicountry study that showed that Twitter’s audience operates in a receptive mindset when using the platform, and the audience is also highly influential across a vast array of topic categories. The same study showed that Twitter users tend to be natural explorers compared to the general online population.

    According to Cartier Stennis, a head of market insights and analytics in the US, “They are more likely to discover new things (82% vs. 71% for the online pop.); They are more open-minded (81% vs. 74%); They also like to be the first to try new things (59% vs. 41%).”

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    #9

    Yeah That's Weird

    Yeah That's Weird

    ellewasamistake Report

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    Nadine Bamberger
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yeah and getting a girlfriend that's over 300 years younger than you is just creepy.

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    Furthermore, they found that Twitter users possess greater influence to compare with users of other platforms. The study showed that “78% of US Twitter users like to give their opinion about things they’re knowledgeable about or interested in (vs 66% US online population) and 55% of US Twitter users share things they’ve seen on Twitter with others offline (by showing them their phone screens).”

    #11

    Me_irl

    Me_irl

    Thryloz Report

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    Jayne Kyra
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wait, isn´t that picture supposed to be Pakalu Papito? Are they the same person or is this an impostor?

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    #12

    Feels

    Feels

    rmccarthyjames Report

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    Vicky Z
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Another day that I'm reading bored panda instead of actually dealing with my life....

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    #16

    Doctor: Excessive Crying Is Normal, You're Not Meant To Be Happy

    Doctor: Excessive Crying Is Normal, You're Not Meant To Be Happy

    bugposting Report

    #17

    If You Call Me, 8/10 Times I Will Ignore It

    If You Call Me, 8/10 Times I Will Ignore It

    Thedepressionoftrees Report

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    Vicky Z
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I would say to go back when people communicated with smoke! Even better for us introverts!

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    #20

    Need A Better System

    Need A Better System

    me_irl Report

    #21

    Fiat Stands For Fix It Again Tony

    Fiat Stands For Fix It Again Tony

    kieransofar Report

    #22

    One Person Doesn't Always Have To Be Right

    One Person Doesn't Always Have To Be Right

    ahahamina Report

    #25

    Waiting For My Package Currently...

    Waiting For My Package Currently...

    Orcanist Report

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    Neil Bidle
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You missed the step where they "attempted delivery", but really they were running late and your parcel got skipped

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    #27

    Mm. Balsa Wood

    Mm. Balsa Wood

    HumoudMosabih Report

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    Lauren Caswell
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Hah yes I could only imagine the spoon-taste before I read underneath XD

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    #28

    Me_irl

    Me_irl

    isabelfulla Report

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    Jayne Kyra
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Welcome to adulthood. You can also expect random pain in the morning, dish-soap running out randomly, and detergent being suddenly low when you only just bought it.

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    #29

    Ia This That Difficult For People

    Ia This That Difficult For People

    chemicalbrodar Report

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    Vicky Z
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That's brilliant! For those who have problem understanding the concept!

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    #30

    I Do

    I Do

    sophiacadogan Report

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    Vicky Z
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My life is a boring grey's anatomy episode with "disappointing surgeries" but without all the sex they are doing in the doctors' room! I want my money back!

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    #31

    A Good Risotto

    A Good Risotto

    kevinowdziej Report

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    Lauren Caswell
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Before I got to the end of his message it was 😱 but it took a sharp turn into aww that's nice :)

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    #32

    I Don’t See The Issue Tbh, Seems Like Good Eye-Witnessin’

    I Don’t See The Issue Tbh, Seems Like Good Eye-Witnessin’

    DrakeGatsby Report

    #35

    Either Way

    Either Way

    kevinowdziej Report

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    Downunderdude
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Very good question. And I hate it when you make the effort to click unsubscribe and it wants you to f*****g log in to do it!

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    #38

    Absolutelynotmeirl

    Absolutelynotmeirl

    ComradeKickass Report

    #39

    Don’t Think For A Second You’ll Ever Surpass Me

    Don’t Think For A Second You’ll Ever Surpass Me

    poop_wagon Report

    #40

    Yep

    Yep

    mckenziedenisee Report

    #41

    Mutant Ninja Tuetlw

    Mutant Ninja Tuetlw

    beluuuuuuga Report

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    Laura Mende (Human)
    Community Member
    3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I imagine these renaissance artist all sitting together under the streets of NYC, eating pizza and practicing some awesome ninja moves! 😂😂😂

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    #43

    I’m A Huge Fan

    I’m A Huge Fan

    deepthriIIs Report

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    Laura Mende (Human)
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    HAHAHA 😂😂😂 Also good: If the in-laws give you parental advice say that you have one of their kids at home and they didn't made a good job on this one. 👍🏻

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    #44

    I'd Like To Hear Em

    I'd Like To Hear Em

    hot4anEngineer Report

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    Yevvie ART
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If that'd be true, we'd just sit there and listen about mental illness, parents divorcing, family issues, abuse etc. Maybe we should, but people in charge don't want to listen to it.

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    #46

    Signature Look Of Superiority

    Signature Look Of Superiority

    Thedepressionoftrees Report

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    I I
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    lol really did lol , i thought we had the meaning of life sh1t coming up

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    #47

    Which Purse Isn’t Like This?

    Which Purse Isn’t Like This?

    hwhouston517 Report

    #48

    Then This Is The Wrong Thing To Buy

    Then This Is The Wrong Thing To Buy

    Thryloz Report

    #49

    They Are Trying Their Best

    They Are Trying Their Best

    leafyIeah Report

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    Julie C Rose
    Community Member
    3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I must be a traditionalist despite being a millennial because what this person is describing is one of the reasons why I won’t touch those apps with a 10-foot pole. I’ll inflate a 3 or 4’s score to a 5 in customer service surveys, but anything lower than that and I’m not doing a survey. And I resent that corporations’ management are lazy and selfish enough that I feel the need to even do that.

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    #50

    Happens

    Happens

    maggieisntcool Report

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    #51

    A Great Moment In Film History

    A Great Moment In Film History

    regian24 Report

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    Laura Mende (Human)
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And the only actors be Johnny Depp and Helena Bonham Carter... 😂😂😂 Either as a loving but creepy couple or one kills the other. Or both.

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    #52

    Cheering Ensues

    Cheering Ensues

    MitchellOfficial Report

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    Yettichild
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm a zoologist, and I can confirm, you get some weird ass questions. Example: How many bears would it take to kill a Velociraptor? Answer: Depends on if we are talking real velociraptor or movie velociraptor, and depends on species of bear. Short answer one polar bear could take out a movie velociraptor no problem.

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    #53

    Super Strict Parents

    Super Strict Parents

    ExpertAccident Report

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    Verena
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    All of which are also good skills, just not taught properly.

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    #55

    Like Why

    Like Why

    DaKahnt Report

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    Scagsy
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Absolutely! You know, you're just getting into the plot, wondering how the plumber is gonna fix the sink and then bam! the sex. So annoying. Never did find out about the sink.

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    #56

    It Scooby Dooby Doo Be Like That Sometimes

    It Scooby Dooby Doo Be Like That Sometimes

    ExpertAccident Report

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    #58

    As A Manual Driver, Can Confirm

    As A Manual Driver, Can Confirm

    cannatajon Report

    #60

    That Boat Scene Is Scary As Hell Ngl

    That Boat Scene Is Scary As Hell Ngl

    DaKahnt Report

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    Lauren Caswell
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The girl who played Violet was so concerned by Gene Wilder's acting in that scene it scared her. Some thought he was actually going mad during the takes. Thats some impressive acting!

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    #61

    It Is Wild

    It Is Wild

    BeastSmitty Report

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    kristy sickles
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oh in my house it's the crazy ghostlady that makes the messes and loses things lol

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    #62

    Beautiful

    Beautiful

    _kairy_draws_ Report

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    Nadine Bamberger
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And that's how Dave wound up at a new school with a new identity and a blank background.

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    #63

    She Doesn’t Like The Way You Had Your Baby

    She Doesn’t Like The Way You Had Your Baby

    killHACKS Report

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    Verena
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    There are lots and lots of disadvantages and risks to c-sections but sometimes it's the only way a woman can deliver safely.

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    #64

    Punch It Chewie!

    Punch It Chewie!

    Wah-day Report

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    Shelp
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Chewbacca's original name in French was "Chique-Tabac", so literally "Tobacco Chewer"

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    #65

    Twitter On Court

    Twitter On Court

    che-ez Report

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    Babs D
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Whenever I do this my friends dare me to say who I like-

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    #67

    It Was A Big Hit 17 Years Ago!

    It Was A Big Hit 17 Years Ago!

    abbyy_giirl Report

    #71

    They Do Indeed

    They Do Indeed

    reddit.com Report

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    #72

    Bro Wtf

    Bro Wtf

    swat_08 Report

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    Babs D
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My sis had a relationship like this and it hurt cuz my sis and the boy she was dating were now enemies-my sis apologized, this was 6 years ago-

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    #73

    Saw This And Had To Share!

    Saw This And Had To Share!

    AdamCSharp Report

    #74

    Me_irl

    Me_irl

    Thryloz Report

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    Nadine Bamberger
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You better get used to it, cause that's not hiw life works, young lady.

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