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40 Hard-To-Believe Funny Stories, As Told By Folks In This Online Community
Do you know the difference between good sitcoms and second-rate ones? Due to the fact that there is not always enough money for screenwriters, not-so-original scenarios and jokes are often used in the second kind of shows. As a result, we understand that this or that plot twist is completely unnatural, and of course, this never happens in real life.
We honestly don't know who writes the scripts for our lives, but it seems that this guy also sometimes uses hackneyed plot moves. We can all agree, each of us has had some moments in our lives when things happened that no one would have believed if told.
There is a recent popular thread in the AskReddit community whose topic starter asked the question: "What's a funny memory you have that if you told someone, they'd think you're lying?" The result was almost 33K upvotes and nearly 10.7K different comments, which prove that our life is sometimes very much like a sitcom.
Bored Panda made a list of some of the most amusing, incredible and sometimes bizarre stories from this thread for you. These tales are simply unbelievable, but at the same time, they are completely true. So feel free to scroll to the very end and be sure to write what you liked the most.
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#1
When I was ditching first period in HS a cop was in front of me at 7/11. The cashier couldn’t break his $50 so I paid for his coffee with my stuff. He thanked me, we jabbed about me being “late”
To school and I noticed the tattoo on his neck and we joked about bad decisions.
Two weeks later I get caught in a speed trap and who sticks his head in my window. And he went, “coffee girl!” And I went “tat neck!” And got let off with a finger shake.
RELATED:
#2
I got saved during a blizzard in the Alps by a big purple cow...
I was skiing in the Alps with some friends and we were off piste doing some jumps and stuff. I was at the back of the group and fell and twisted my knee (not quite) landing a jump. Managed to get myself a bit lost as a blizzard set in and I couldn't see s**t. Carefully scrabbled around on my dodgy knee for a bit and thought I was about to end up in a fair amount of trouble.
Then, out of the snow appeared my purple angel. A purple shape coming out of the blizzard, which as it got closer appeared to be an upright purple cow on skis.
Turns out, it was the Milka chocolate mascot, a guy dressed in a purple cow costume on skiing about the hills dishing out chocolate.
He skied right up to me and said "Hey man, you ok? You want some chocolate?"
He then skied back to the piste with me and took me to the nearest bar to get a beer.
Guess who else is in the bar! My friends who were getting increasingly concerned that they'd lost me! Milka man dished out some more chocolate to everyone and skied off never to be seen again.
Thank you purple cow angel, you saved me that day and gave me chocolate!
#3
A friend once called the wrong number, got the wrong house, and had the right person pick up.
So, I was at work, replacing a modem for my boss. I'd removed the modem and connected a telephone to test that it had dial-tone.
Soon after, the phone rang. It didn't make much sense, because that phone line had only been used for outgoing calls from the computer.
When I picked up, the person on the other line just said 'Hey man, you want to see a movie later?'. I recognized the voice, too. It was a friend of mine. I was really confused for a second and said something like 'Josh? How did you get this number?'. He said he called my home phone number.
He must have misdialed my number, and accidentally dialed the number for my bosses modem line, at work.
He called the wrong number, got the wrong house, and the right person picked up, on a phone that had only been connected for 2 minutes in the past 2 years. The odds must be astronomical.
It's just a weird coincidence that I'll always remember.
#4
So I worked for the IRS collecting taxes several years ago. I had seized someone's car and the IRS sales people were in the process of selling it. IRS procedures around some of this stuff are ancient. One of the procedures are to post a notice of sale in three public locations.
So I go to the library to post a notice of sale. The person on the ground floor says that I'll have to talk to Steve on the second floor to see if it's ok for me to post the notice of sale on the bulletin board. I walk up the stairs and see a guy sitting at the desk.
Me: "Are you Steve"
Steve: "Who's asking? The IRS?" (In a playful manner)
Me: <long pause> "Yes, in fact. My name is XXXXXX....."
Steve: <just about falls out of his chair> "Jesus Christ! I've been using that joke for 20 years! I never thought anyone would ever say yes!"
Thee8thsense 2 years ago
When I was in college, I worked for the IRS, and was also a Deadhead. I became friends with a couple of band members, and one day before a show, we were hanging out in the hotel room of one of them. In walked Owsley Stanley, who was at one time a sound engineer for the band, and very well known for his potent lsd. I mentioned that I needed to call work, and he asked me who I worked for. I replied "the IRS", and he turned ghostly white and exited the room. Turns out, the Feds had attempted to arrest him on drug charges, but he dodged them on numerous occasions. However, he ended up doing time anyway because they decided to nail him on tax evasion. Oops.
Victoria Anderson 2 years ago
Steve made a joke about the IRS. He never expected the other guy to be an actual IRS worker.
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Thomas Santiago 1 year ago
https://youtu.be/zwsmqZLCKPE Ok, so when I was a kid I used to love Bert and Ernie on Sesame Street, and I must have been 3 but remember all their skits to this day, so Im working at my comic store on a Saturday, which was great because it was always super busy, but I had extra people to answer the phone, but it was usually for me anyway so they'd always hand me the phone, but would buy me a minute with the customer I was helping. So my buddy had just given blood and he had a banana and gave it to the guy that works for me to give to me. I'm behind the counter turned around backwards looking for something. He leans over the counter and says " Here" handing me a banana, I'm all confused, he says " It's for you"! I just instinctively put it to my ear and said " Hello? Sorry, I can't hear you right now I have a banana in my ear". They all cracked up! I waited 40 years to tell that joke! 😂😂😂 🍌🍌🍌🍌
Thomas Santiago 1 year ago
Ok, so when I was a kid I used to love Bert and Ernie on Sesame Street, and I must have been 3 but remember all their skits to this day, so Im working at my comic store on a Saturday, which was great because it was always super busy, but I had extra people to answer the phone, but it was usually for me anyway, but would buy me a minute with the customer, so my buddy had just given blood and he had a banana and gave it to the guy that works for me to give to me. I'm behind the counter turned around backwards looking for something. He leans over the counter and says " Here" handing me a banana, I'm all confused, he says " It's for you"! I just instinctively put it to my ear and said " Hello? I can't hear you right now I have a banana in my ear". They all cracked up! I waited 40 years to tell that joke! 😂😂😂
ohjojo (you/your's) 2 years ago
Be careful Steve, next time it might be the Spanish Inquisition
Nicoll Cope 2 years ago
I have an autoimmune disease, lupus. I was diagnosed during the time that House MD was a really popular series, so I got a lot of the "but it's never lupus" comments, frequently. I was working in a data center, and most of the guys I worked with were my age or slightly younger (we were all in our 20s, with the exception of the manager and such), so we all just constantly had smart a*s comments for each other. I had come back to work after being in the hospital and one of the guys asked why I had been sick, so I told him about my lupus, expecting to answer questions. Instead he did the "it's never lupus!" thing. I laughed and was like unfortunately this time it was... (He thought lupus was made up, so some good did come from it.) A couple minutes later, on another topic, he popped off with "you're adopted!" ... OK but I actually was lol. I honestly felt so bad for him, but he had never known anyone to be affected by those things, so he was super quiet around me afterwards.
#5
Started college. Saw my brother's best friend on campus, from a distance. Hard to miss: Nate's 6'6", skinny, long brown hair. Fitting of our childish friendship, I straight up open-field tackle the guy. From behind. Blindsided.
It's not Nate. I apologize, and sheepishly run away. Three hours later, a girl friend from high school introduces her new boyfriend to a group of us. It's the guy I tackled. Danny. Super nice (and forgiving) guy.
We've been friends for 15 years.
Remi (He/Him) 2 years ago
Meet cute/ugly friendship. A fic writer should take some inspiration.... just saying
#6
"Me being black does not mean I am good at basketball!" I said before lazily throwing the ball backwards over my head for a 3 pointer
szu szu 2 years ago
BAHAHAH, I grew up with a British parent and so I learned phrases and weird word pronunciations at a young age. Some kids in elementary school were teasing me about being English, not Canadian and I got frustrated and yelled at them "I'm not bloody English!" In an unintentional imitation of my dad's angry voice. Yep, I apparently yell with a British accent. Or used to anyway, lol.
#7
I went to see some London fireworks around ten years ago - not NYE, it was the Mayor’s parade or something - and we’re all on the bridge waiting quietly for the show to bedazzle us.
A tipsy fella and some tipsy ladies were singing *Be Our Guest* from *Beauty and the Beast* but got stuck on a certain bit and couldn’t remember the line…
Flash back to 10yo me sitting in front of the telly watching a VHS of *Beauty and the Beast*, scribbling the lyrics for that very same song onto some paper.
See, my class in school were putting on a BatB play but we didn’t have lyrics. I can’t sing for s**t but I’d valiantly offered to transcribe them, not realising the Herculean task ahead, trying to decipher some of the words.
The play never happened - a shame because I’d been cast as Gaston - but the lyrics for *Be Our Guest* would forever be seared into my brain, waiting for their opportunity. One day.
And fan my brow, opportunity had finally come knocking!
But I was so nervous. I was sweating. Maybe even shaking.
Somehow the stars aligned and the universe bestowed upon me the courage to help these these inebriated revellers who were clearly in over their heads.
I waited for someone, anyone, to join in.
No takers.
It was now or never. Well, it was *then* or never.
I prepped my dodgy French accent and started singing:
*“Life is so unnerving,
For a servant who’s not serving.
He’s not whole without a soul to wait upon…”*
It was like a film. People turned around and made way as I started shakily walking towards them.
*“Ten years we have been rusting,
Needing so much more than dusting!
Needing exercise! A chance to use our skills!
Most days we just lay around the castle…”*
They turned around beaming, the dude put his arm around my shoulder and we sang the rest of that bit together:
*“Flabby, fat and lazy,
You walked in and oopsie-daisy!”*
We high-fived, onlookers clapped, and I shakily walked back to join my mates. Once I’d come to my senses, I asked why none of them had filmed it!
I’m not sure if anyone else filmed it. I remembered seeing cameras pointing at us so I hunted around YouTube for a while after that but eventually gave up.
Regardless, such an opportunity may never appear again and I’m so glad I temporarily had the guts to just go for it.
#8
I tell everyone this, I dunno if someone would think I'm lying about it though. But it's just too funny for it to be real, in my opinion.
Roommate walked in and said "did you hear about Steve?"
I said "unless he's dead, I don't want to hear about it."
There was a moment of silence. Followed by
"...Tiffany.... "
Sure enough. He's dead.
Edit: My name is Tiffany. And me and the guy ended on bad terms but I did grieve his death and he is still in my thoughts every so often.
Robin Butler 2 years ago
I do rape crisis work on call and had several calls in the span of a few days. I was taking some comp time after working nearly 20 hours in 2 days and my work pager (because I'm that old) went off. I said 'somebody better be dead' as I'm dialing the office. Yep, our executive director had died and they were notifying the staff. Last time I said that in response to any page or phone call ever again.
#9
I had a pet humming bird as a kid. My mom found it injured on a sidewalk and nursed it back to health. It only had one eye and no depth perception so we kept it inside. We'd let it buzz around the room, land on us, and all that jazz. My brother told his teacher about it (in 3rd grade) and the teacher actually called my mom and was like "your son has made up a crazy story and insists its real". Reality was we had a pet humming bird and that seemed crazy enough people didn't believe it.
Peign Gaming 2 years ago
Sounds like the teacher who kept getting mad at the boy and called him a liar because he kept saying his uncle is superman. (Henry Cavill is his uncle)
#10
I was the brokest I have ever been living in the middle of nowhere. I was pulling my last 20 dollars out of a gas station ATM. I hit the button and it spit out 60 dollars. I was only charged 20 on my account. It sounds like such a tall tale but I swear it happened.
#11
I once pulled up at a red light where a cat was sat by the side of the road. When the green man came on, the cat got up and crossed the road!
#12
I once showed up to a mates house with a bacon and egg roll from maccas. He jokingly asked "did you get me one?" I did, and without saying a word I pulled it out of the bag and threw it to him, the wrapping dropped off in mid air, he caught the burger one handed, we both looked at each other in amazement, and bit straight in.
#13
Not that I remember it personally, but I was born in a helicopter on Christmas. When I was a kid I used to say I was twins with Jesus because we came from above on the same day.
I don't mention it unless someone asks because I know it sounds insane.
#14
Well not so unbelievable as we’ve been married 5 years now but when I first met my wife I was in Vancouver for a student program for the summer. She was a model and crazy beautiful, I was some dirty farm kid from Saskatchewan who couldn’t flirt to save his life and had never kissed a girl or taken one on a date. So when I came back to my hometown, the way I told people about my girlfriend was: “yeah I have a girlfriend but she’s a model in Vancouver and no one here has ever met her yet. Maybe one day!” Took more than 2 years for anyone to believe me
Edit: WOW this blew up, I won a scholarship to a improv camp (yes I was also a theatre kid) and she was in my group for the week, just to be clear her name is Fiona and I sang “All Star” by smash mouth to win her over. If you have any other questions please send me a message because I love bragging about her!
Edit 2: yes in my case shrek literally is love.
Benita Valdez 2 years ago (edited)
Ha ha. Here in the U.S. it's a running joke about a "nerdy" guy who has a girlfriend in Canada. They have an elusive girlfriend in Canada, usually a model, but of course usually it's just a lie. There was a play off Broadway, Avenue Q, that has a song "My Girlfriend, Who Lives in Canada" 🤣 🎶her name is Alberta, she lives in Vancouver, she cooks like my mother, and sucks like a hoover🎶
#15
An eagle came for my face as a child. I was about 8. I ducked and it ended up grabbing my hair and taking some with it. I ran inside crying and told my mom. She didn't believe me so I never told anyone else. I'm 22.
Remi (He/Him) 2 years ago
Probably a situation with a nest or their chick being close by. Many birds do scare tactics like dive bombing and such and some owls will go straight for your eyes if you're not careful. The mom is an ignoramus.
#16
I once checked in at a restaurant and gave the hostess my name to hold my slot, she then asked for my last name since the person below shared my first name. When I told her my last name, she looked at my like I was lying. The person below had my first and last name. She laughed and introduced us, and we took a pic. I’ve never met someone with my same first and last name since.
HarriMissesScotland 2 years ago
I'll try to make it short, but it's very convoluted. Florist in my hometown received an order for my sister's funeral. She called my dad's neighbor to ask if my sister had died. Neighbor says no, and goes to talk to my dad, who freaks out. He couldn't reach her, so he called me, and I couldn't reach her either, so as I am walking out the door for a 4 hour drive to her house, she calls. Many other bizarre twists and turns, but a woman with the exact first, middle and last name had been killed in a wreck. AND she had the same exact birthday to add to the confusion, and lived 15 miles apart. It was nuts!!
#17
I was driving a friend home to Indianapoilis from Holy Cross in South Bend. We got pulled over for speeding and the cop asked me "Son do you know how fast you were going?" to which I replied with a straight face and no sarcasm "Well my cruise control was set at 88 so I'm guessing somewhere in the vicinity of 88?" I've never seen such a confused look on a person's face. He proceeds to ask if I can step out of my vehicle and into his so he can talk to me while he writes me a ticket. I comply and as he's writing me up he's explaining to me how he had to do his Sherrif training in Indianapolis. He said thatt the one thing that amazed him was how fast locals drive esp on I465 and he understands why I'm conditioned to do so. Soon as he's done with the ticket he turns to me and says "So here's the deal, you're the first motorist to ever admit to me you knew you were speeding so I'm gonna cut you a break. If you can make it back to Indy without getting another ticket I won't turn this one in, but if you do you're getting 2'" I slowed down for the rest of the drive.
Moon Beams 2 years ago
My one speeding ticket I had the needle buried and was probably close to 100. The cop asked if I knew how fast I was going. I said "about 100" he said, " well I got you at 82" I replied " I guess the brakes work" he was not amused and I still got my ticket.
#18
I peed on a bear once at 12 or 13. Some background I lived in a mountain cabin with some family aunts and cousins and stuff. The cabin was small but we had several acres so we had about 4 RV trailers for the rest of the family. 2 were my aunts 1 was for weed and the last and closest smallest was for children which was just my brother and I at the time.
Anyhow it was a cold wintery day with fresh snow as I wake up having to p**s so bad I'm surprised I didn't wet the bed. Im groggy as hell and my eyes are barely open as I head to the trailer door and open it start my morning leak. I did not notice the bear less than 2 feet away so close I could've pet him if I leaned a bit forward with its head in the garbage can until I was halfway done when it moved. So of course I turned my whole body in my half asleep state in to see what moved and I finally notice a giant brown furry thing and I'm pissing all over its hind left thigh and leg as I'm wondering what it is, as the bear lifts its head and looks at me. We stare at each other for a moment as I my actions begin to dawn on me. A moment later I finish. The bear and I stared at each for several moments until I took a step back, shut our flimsy door and locked our deadbolt that would've been useless had the bear decided I insulted his honor. And I went back to bed listening and waiting until I eventually went back to sleep.
Hill Branda 2 years ago
And the bear tells a story of the strange human who just peed on him and then disappeared.
#19
This was a couple years ago but I pulled up to a stop light, and another vehicle in the next lane also comes to a stop. The car is filled with what looks like high school kids. The kid in the passenger seat notices me, taps on his window and starts doing the universal sign for rock, paper, scissors. I look at the light (which is still red) and immediately think f**k it and play along so we start. 1..2..3..shoot and we tie.1..2..3..shoot, we tie again. This keeps happening. All the young kids in the other car are involved and are screaming like "WOOOOOAAH" everytime we tie. We literally got off like 15 rounds of rock, paper, scissors and tied every single time until the light turned green. I'm still high from that and hope all those guys are doing well.
#20
In college I was walking to class and a thunderstorm hit, but I had just gotten a girlfriend and I was in the best mood of my life so I was just getting soaked and smiling from ear to ear.
A guy walked by with an umbrella, I smiled at him and said hi. He took down his umbrella and got soaked with me and we proceeded to talk about how moments like these are what makes life magical, if only we let ourselves experience them. 20 minute conversation later, the storm stopped and we went our separate ways.
My new girlfriend, a cognitive science major, saw me and ran over to me. She said, “why didn’t you call me??? You know Oliver Sacks is one of my heroes!”
Me: “that was Oliver Sacks?”
Apparently he was a speaker that night for a neuroscience conference. He also has prosopagnosia (face blindness) so it’s possible that he thought we knew each other when I said hi.
Terry Tobias 2 years ago
'Awakenings' with Robin Williams is a great movie! It's one of those bittersweet movies that is very interesting, especially for anyone who is interested in psychology and cognitive science. I once saw an interview with Robin and Oliver Sacks, and needless to say it was kind of funny!
#21
Short one, yet true nonetheless. Having a hectic day once, running errands I didn’t enjoy. Grocery shopping, quick Home Depot visit, going to bank etc etc. I forgot an item I needed at home for bank teller so I drive back irritated, driving fast, trying to make it back to bank before closing time. As I turn into my apartment’s parking lot there I notice ahead of me a squirrel. I hit my breaks to let the squirrel run by, but he’s just sitting there, nibbling on something. As I slowly drive closer I notice this squirrel is not only nibbling on fries, but he’s imitating dipping a single fry into a crushed and empty ketchup packet. I looked around to see if anyone was seeing what I was seeing. I couldn’t believe it. This m**o was dipping a fry in ketchup. A squirrel. I didn’t take a picture because my phone was dead. PrOoF Or It DiDn’T hApPeN — I know, I know. But, I think about this memory once a month or so and it’s been two years. No one ever believes me. A Big foot sighting would have been more plausible. Sometimes I think the fry eating squirrel was a form of deity or god, reminding me to slow the eff down in life. Who knows.
Paul Pienkowski 2 years ago
No, I've seen one do this at the zoo. It was a food court area and a big fat squirrel was sitting on top of a table with a plate of leftover fries and a hotdog bun. He picked up a piece of bun and a fry and made a kind of sandwich and smeared it in the ranch puddle on the plate.
#22
I was in elementary school, during recess, just kinda daydreaming and looking at some ravens flying overhead, when one of them suddenly took a nosedive... right into an open trashcan.
So of course i rush over there to check it out, but the raven was just gone out of nowhere. I was not the only pne who saw it though, another kid came rushing over as well, and thats how i met my best friend for the next 4 years
Kookamunga 2 years ago
These stories are weird and all too believable. Birds crash into stuff all the time.
#23
Background: my parents live in an old house, and my brother moved into one that's a bit of a fixer-upper. My dad knows how to do carpentry, electrical, and plumbing, and passed this knowledge on to us through home renovations.
I am forbidden from using the phrase, "hey guys wouldn't it be hilarious if...." because every time I do, that thing happens in the worst way possible - even if it's something wild and implausible.
"Would it be hilarious if the old porch was solid concrete?" - it was, with 1-inch thick rebar holding it together.
"Wouldn't it be hilarious if that wire was still live?" - it was, and power to the entire house was shut off. Someone wired this outlet in before the circuit breakers.
"Wouldn't it be hilarious if that old pipe was full of water still?" - Brother cut into it, water began gushing out.
"Wouldn't it be hilarious if this trellis was holding up the entire wall?" - Wall began rapidly sagging down because the damn trellis was structurally integral.
Stephanie Paich 2 years ago
This is where you go "wouldn't it be hilarious if I won the lottery today?"
#24
i tripped and fell at the same corner outside subway 3 different times years apart and the same guy tried to catch me every single time.
EDIT: okay i keep getting loads of soulmate/marriage comments so to clarify i was SEVEN the first time this happened. this was a grown man lmao.
EDIT2: this man is not a stalker, him and my mum would recognise eachother because she was with me each time, yes he fell trying to catch me but it was funny so its okay, and no this was not the underground train type of subway i mean the sandwich shop, he did not work there and no he isn't homeless.
#25
Saw a chicken walking along a road, cross to the other side, and keep walking same direction.
Just like the joke
#26
My sister being bullied by a parrot calling her names
Zelda Fitzgerald 2 years ago
I had a neighbor who had parrots that would yell "SHUT THE FCK UP!" when their dogs would bark and "GO AWAY!" when the doorbell would ring.
#27
Before my husband and I were married, but had been dating for a long while, I was watching Portlandia and BAM there’s my husband on screen. Dumbfounded I called him and he casually said “oh yeah I forgot about that”.
#28
Got stuck in a bank for the night. When the bank is closed, you can still get to the ATM thanks to a security door. Once inside the door decided to stop working. No phone, no emergency button. Just waited here for hours till someone in the street saw me trough the glass and called someone
#29
Was contract programming, dropping into the office every Friday. The assistant QA dude was there to take my work; "Who died and left you in charge?" -- "Jeff died two days ago." :-o
#30
I once threw a ball for my dog and it landed on his head, rolled perfectly down his spine and off his tail.
#31
I was playing basketball in the park with my mom. Neither of us were very athletic, we were just having fun. There was some kid hanging around us and we weren’t trying to be rude so we let him. After a few minutes of some of the worst questions I’ve ever heard, he asked me if I could throw the ball at the basket backwards. I said sure. See, had he asked if I could make it backwards I woulda said no, but he only asked if I could throw it backwards, which I could. My mom knew what I was doing, hell I picked up so much from her growing up it was probably her idea before I said anything. I took a half hearted peak at the basket, turned around, no warm up, just let that ball fly. I turned back around to watch the obvious miss. I started to say, “See, I threw it at the basket,” but all I gout outta my mouth was, “See-“
And then the ball went in. Swish. Nothing but net. Backboard? That thing never even hit the rim. I don’t have the Will to keep a straight face if I looked at the kid. I looked my mom and said “just like that.” She was almost as surprised as I was
That kid told me he didn’t think I could do it again. Mamma beat me to it this time and said, “ I think it’s your turn”
He left us alone soon after
#32
I went to see Mitch Hedberg do stand up. We stayed around awhile hoping to see him leaving. He never materialized though, so my husband and I walked towards our car. As we were walking we heard a woman yell from an ally “Hey! Mitch Hedberg is back here signing autographs!” We walked around the corner behind a scary old building. It was like 1am and pretty dark. There was Mitch Hedberg and no other fans. Just him and his wife, who had been the one to yell about autographs. He was very high and super lovey. He hugged my husband and me and told us what his fans mean to him. HE took pictures of US for his scrapbook page online. He was also hilarious. We were just there behind a building at 1am with Mitch Hedberg and his wife laughing and hugging deep into the wee hours… When I tell people this they go silent and I’m not sure why. I figure they don’t believe it.
#33
Was walking and chatting with 2 friends, all of us in a line, when suddenly the furthest away from me disappears from peripheral vision. Look down and she's fallen face first to the ground, saying she stepped on something slippery. The only thing under her is a banana peel.The girl literally slipped on a banana peel.
#34
I was walking on a hiking/biking trail when a woman rode past me on her bicycle. I yelled out, “keep the pedal to the metal.” Not two seconds later I hear an awful metallic noise and turn to see the poor woman’s pedal mechanism had fallen apart. She told me, “you shouldn’t have said that!” I apologized profusely and asked if she needed any help. Naturally she didn’t…not from me anyway.
#36
It’s only funny now because so much time has passed but I had just flown in to visit a buddy and he picked me up from the airport. His house was a bit away from the airport so I ended up passing out. Anyways, I woke up to some commotion outside. He had stopped at a gas station. I stumbled out of the car and found a gun pointed at my head. He had gotten into an altercation with a couple of dudes and I guess I startled the second guy because the windows were tinted and they assumed he was alone.
Probably because I was half asleep and couldn’t really grasp what was going on, I muttered - “Well? Either pull the f*****g trigger or get out of my way cuz I really need to take a p**s.” I guess all of that was enough to dead whatever the f**k was going on and they dispersed.
Texas in case anyone was wondering or shocked. And no, I cannot confirm that is how I would handle situations like that wide awake lol
#37
I was playing 8-ball at a bar one night (I'm not very good just play for fun). I'm on a slight winning streak. My next opponent racks them, and I break. 8 ball goes in on the break so it's an automatic win! Dude refuses to leave the table, continues to put quarters in and racks again. I'm like dude u lost .. there's like 8 people in line to play next. He's drunk and being stubborn and won't leave. So I break again.. and the 8 ball drops again.. dude walks away without saying a word
#38
Back in middle school I was walking back to class after lunch when someone chucked something down the hallway as hard as they could. My natural instinct was to jump up and catch it. It was a perfect catch and not a single person saw. It was a mozzarella stick.
#39
I'm a police dispatcher. You won't believe this, but one time some nutcase called and tried to make us arrest some kid cus they didn't want to help him catch his dog or something
Russ Kincade 2 years ago
... or something? A funny thing happened yesterday. No, it was three years ago!
#40
My buddy and I once were out and a dog catcher or whatever tried to make us help them catch this stupid a*s dog. We didn’t help them so they threatened to call the police on us
What do you think ?
Adam Belaire 2 years ago
My "hard to believe" story is back in my home province of PEI, Canada. In a remote rural area with very few houses, I was walking down the street playing Pokemon Go and hatching pokemon eggs. I look up and saw a fox coming towards me on the road. We passed each other, he didn't run or break stride. Said to him "Nice night" Rude bugger didn't answer back!
James G. Currie 2 years ago
Rats...here I was hoping that at least my home province was immune... *sigh*
Load More Replies...
Jespren Ray 2 years ago
My dad, the pastor, and the chief of police (or our very small town) went on a fishing trip. Now none of these guys really looks all that honest and upstanding when they aren’t in professional clothes but after a day of fishing they all look thoroughly disreputable. Someone made some joke about handcuffs and the police chief ended up putting the pastor in cuffs as an example to explain something and…the keys fell out of the boat. So here are three disreputable looking males walking down the side of a road in the middle of nowhere, one handcuffed (on their way to their truck to head home) when a state police pulls up to them. Apparently 3 men had recently escaped from police custody in a nearby township who somewhat matched their descriptions. It apparently took quite the convincing to get the state cop to unlock the handcuffs and let them about their business and all three were very fond of retelling the story.
Henry Myers 2 years ago
Once in high school someone threw a pencil towards my general side of the room and it was heading directly towards my head, but without knowing it, I was stretching my arms and I blocked the pencil no-look. People saw and told me I have superpowers
Izzy Curer 2 years ago (edited)
I don't know if it's hard to believe or not, but I got to swim with a sea turtle, once. She swam right up to me, and I paddled around her for a while. I started petting her, and noticed she wasn't acting right. It turned out she was sick and trying to reach the shore. I helped pull her in and called our local sea turtle rescue people to come get her. They took her to a rehab facility. I found out later she had a uterine infection.
Seedy Vine 2 years ago
Thanks for saving that turtle.. you have an appropriate last name!
Load More Replies...
Dillon Brown 2 years ago
A few of my friends were going to another friends house and I picked them up to drive over together. I stepped up all the way to stand on the very lip of the door, so close my nose was literally touching the door itself. When Steve answered the door he obviously wasn't expecting to see me that close so his brain must have just told him no one was there. I continued to stay perfectly still and he asked where I was peering around the yard for me. That's when I moved and he jumped like three feet backwards and was like 'your a freeking ninja! How did you get there!'
Seedy Vine 2 years ago
I used to sell tool books over the phone years ago. One time I rang a mechanic's office to sell them some books at the very moment my father walked into their office to sell them some tools! We were living across the country from one another. The people I called handed the phone over to my dad. Coolest sales call ever!
Colin Timp 2 years ago
I had a guy come up to me in a gas station asking if I owned the Mazda outside. I was like "oh c**p," thinking he had hit me. He hadn't. He's like "come look at this!" We walk out and there's an identical car next to mine. Same color and everything. He tells me to look at the plates. They were sequential. Like mine was 405 KLD (not real) and his was 406 KLD. He was really excited about it.
Katie Lutesinger 2 years ago
I dropped a glass ornament and instinctively stuck my foot out to try and catch it for some reason. It bounced gently off my slipper and landed on the bed, unharmed. I still can't believe it.
Dagnirath 2 years ago
I went to high school in a tiny, middle-of-nowhere town. One day as I was walking home I heard hoofbeats behind me. I turned just in time to catch a glimpse of 3-4 deer crossing the road. I turned back around just in time to see a large raptor (vulture, hawk, maybe even an eagle) take flight off the next telephone pole.
Deborah Harris 2 years ago
Ok am I the only one who noticed this author is a BDSM specialist?....And yes you need to click the 'read more' button to see more lol :D
Nikhita Clement 2 years ago
Business development and social media marketing
Load More Replies... Lee 2 years ago
I "kïlled" my great aunt. I was watching Game of Thrones and it was right in the middle of the Mountain and Viper fight when my mother called. I looked at my roommate and was like "somebody had better be dyïng or ded if I'm gonna answer this call." I could HARDLY keep a straight face when my mother told me great aunt had passed. It was just so out of left field.
Jessica Reahm 2 years ago
I’m blonde and my husband is a red head. Jess and Ken. Went bowling years ago and we notice the names of the couple on the lane next to us are Jess and Ken. We look at the couple and it’s a blonde and a red head!
Thomas Santiago 1 year ago
I have had toooo many to name here, crazy life, but someone reminded me we had been looking like crazy to find our lost dog, finally went to the animal shelter, didn't see her there, so went to the office to make a report. Just me, mom and the officer who was on a phone call just as we walked in. As were waiting we noticed he was taking down the description of our Found Lost dog! She was quite a few neighborhoods away and got lost trying to find the place but knew we were close. Saw a parked cop car and stopped to ask him directions, then noticed he was checking out a residence with his Gun drawn! We sat there like whaaat!? Then he walked over, talked to us, and gave us a police escort to the house and had our little wanderer back the same day. Timing is everything! But what the heck was he doing!?? One minute has his gun drawn snooping around someone's yard next minute, sure I'll help you find your dog! Huh!!?? Not even close to the weirdest thing I've seen, but a nice story 😁
Andrew Holmes 2 years ago
Once, I went to visit my sister in college on a weekend. Her and her roommates had a bunch of people over and we all decided to play catchphrase. A couple of rounds in, this dude I had never met before gets a particularly difficult phrase and says "OH man how am I supposed to get anyone to guess this?!" As a joke, I responded as fast as I could, "Glass blowing!" As soon as the words left my mouth, the guy started and stared at me for like 5 seconds before finally saying, "Yes!! How did you do that?!" It was super weird but it made me feel kinda cool lol.
Istax 2 years ago
my hard to believe story is how I got my pet chickens... it was years ago, I was just leaving the house when I saw a chicken in the road. at first I thought it was a pigeon or something at first, then I realised, hey, no, it's a damn chicken! picked it up and put it in the back garden, went around and asked all my neighbours if they had an escaped chicken. no-one had. that night, the chicken disappeared from my garden and I found it in a tree nearby! ended up keeping the chicken, now I own an entire flock. and there was the time I thought the original chicken had duplicated itself or something since another chicken identical to the first showed up in the road again!
Adam Belaire 2 years ago
My "hard to believe" story is back in my home province of PEI, Canada. In a remote rural area with very few houses, I was walking down the street playing Pokemon Go and hatching pokemon eggs. I look up and saw a fox coming towards me on the road. We passed each other, he didn't run or break stride. Said to him "Nice night" Rude bugger didn't answer back!
James G. Currie 2 years ago
Rats...here I was hoping that at least my home province was immune... *sigh*
Load More Replies... Jespren Ray 2 years ago
My dad, the pastor, and the chief of police (or our very small town) went on a fishing trip. Now none of these guys really looks all that honest and upstanding when they aren’t in professional clothes but after a day of fishing they all look thoroughly disreputable. Someone made some joke about handcuffs and the police chief ended up putting the pastor in cuffs as an example to explain something and…the keys fell out of the boat. So here are three disreputable looking males walking down the side of a road in the middle of nowhere, one handcuffed (on their way to their truck to head home) when a state police pulls up to them. Apparently 3 men had recently escaped from police custody in a nearby township who somewhat matched their descriptions. It apparently took quite the convincing to get the state cop to unlock the handcuffs and let them about their business and all three were very fond of retelling the story.
Henry Myers 2 years ago
Once in high school someone threw a pencil towards my general side of the room and it was heading directly towards my head, but without knowing it, I was stretching my arms and I blocked the pencil no-look. People saw and told me I have superpowers
Izzy Curer 2 years ago (edited)
I don't know if it's hard to believe or not, but I got to swim with a sea turtle, once. She swam right up to me, and I paddled around her for a while. I started petting her, and noticed she wasn't acting right. It turned out she was sick and trying to reach the shore. I helped pull her in and called our local sea turtle rescue people to come get her. They took her to a rehab facility. I found out later she had a uterine infection.
Seedy Vine 2 years ago
Thanks for saving that turtle.. you have an appropriate last name!
Load More Replies... Dillon Brown 2 years ago
A few of my friends were going to another friends house and I picked them up to drive over together. I stepped up all the way to stand on the very lip of the door, so close my nose was literally touching the door itself. When Steve answered the door he obviously wasn't expecting to see me that close so his brain must have just told him no one was there. I continued to stay perfectly still and he asked where I was peering around the yard for me. That's when I moved and he jumped like three feet backwards and was like 'your a freeking ninja! How did you get there!'
Seedy Vine 2 years ago
I used to sell tool books over the phone years ago. One time I rang a mechanic's office to sell them some books at the very moment my father walked into their office to sell them some tools! We were living across the country from one another. The people I called handed the phone over to my dad. Coolest sales call ever!
Colin Timp 2 years ago
I had a guy come up to me in a gas station asking if I owned the Mazda outside. I was like "oh c**p," thinking he had hit me. He hadn't. He's like "come look at this!" We walk out and there's an identical car next to mine. Same color and everything. He tells me to look at the plates. They were sequential. Like mine was 405 KLD (not real) and his was 406 KLD. He was really excited about it.
Katie Lutesinger 2 years ago
I dropped a glass ornament and instinctively stuck my foot out to try and catch it for some reason. It bounced gently off my slipper and landed on the bed, unharmed. I still can't believe it.
Dagnirath 2 years ago
I went to high school in a tiny, middle-of-nowhere town. One day as I was walking home I heard hoofbeats behind me. I turned just in time to catch a glimpse of 3-4 deer crossing the road. I turned back around just in time to see a large raptor (vulture, hawk, maybe even an eagle) take flight off the next telephone pole.
Deborah Harris 2 years ago
Ok am I the only one who noticed this author is a BDSM specialist?....And yes you need to click the 'read more' button to see more lol :D
Nikhita Clement 2 years ago
Business development and social media marketing
Load More Replies... Lee 2 years ago
I "kïlled" my great aunt. I was watching Game of Thrones and it was right in the middle of the Mountain and Viper fight when my mother called. I looked at my roommate and was like "somebody had better be dyïng or ded if I'm gonna answer this call." I could HARDLY keep a straight face when my mother told me great aunt had passed. It was just so out of left field.
Jessica Reahm 2 years ago
I’m blonde and my husband is a red head. Jess and Ken. Went bowling years ago and we notice the names of the couple on the lane next to us are Jess and Ken. We look at the couple and it’s a blonde and a red head!
Thomas Santiago 1 year ago
I have had toooo many to name here, crazy life, but someone reminded me we had been looking like crazy to find our lost dog, finally went to the animal shelter, didn't see her there, so went to the office to make a report. Just me, mom and the officer who was on a phone call just as we walked in. As were waiting we noticed he was taking down the description of our Found Lost dog! She was quite a few neighborhoods away and got lost trying to find the place but knew we were close. Saw a parked cop car and stopped to ask him directions, then noticed he was checking out a residence with his Gun drawn! We sat there like whaaat!? Then he walked over, talked to us, and gave us a police escort to the house and had our little wanderer back the same day. Timing is everything! But what the heck was he doing!?? One minute has his gun drawn snooping around someone's yard next minute, sure I'll help you find your dog! Huh!!?? Not even close to the weirdest thing I've seen, but a nice story 😁
Andrew Holmes 2 years ago
Once, I went to visit my sister in college on a weekend. Her and her roommates had a bunch of people over and we all decided to play catchphrase. A couple of rounds in, this dude I had never met before gets a particularly difficult phrase and says "OH man how am I supposed to get anyone to guess this?!" As a joke, I responded as fast as I could, "Glass blowing!" As soon as the words left my mouth, the guy started and stared at me for like 5 seconds before finally saying, "Yes!! How did you do that?!" It was super weird but it made me feel kinda cool lol.
Istax 2 years ago
my hard to believe story is how I got my pet chickens... it was years ago, I was just leaving the house when I saw a chicken in the road. at first I thought it was a pigeon or something at first, then I realised, hey, no, it's a damn chicken! picked it up and put it in the back garden, went around and asked all my neighbours if they had an escaped chicken. no-one had. that night, the chicken disappeared from my garden and I found it in a tree nearby! ended up keeping the chicken, now I own an entire flock. and there was the time I thought the original chicken had duplicated itself or something since another chicken identical to the first showed up in the road again!
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