Facebook Marketplace can be a great platform if you want to declutter your home and make a little money while doing it. However, it can also be a treasure trove of hilarious and horrible listings. People post all sorts of stuff on there, perhaps not even realizing how funny it might be.
This time, we chose listings with slightly misspelled titles. Courtesy of r/BoneAppleTea, titles that sound right or similar to what they should be. Let's chuckle at how these owners misspelled their listing – doesn't matter intentionally or not. So scroll down to find the funniest marketplace listings shared by people on r/BoneAppleTea.
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Catholic Converter
Autistic Guitar
My Grandma's Abdomen
Grandma, no nudes allowed on BP. Please get dressed.
Bored Panda compiled this list of chucklesome marketplace listings from the r/BoneAppleTea subreddit. The community over there loves funny malapropisms. What's a malapropism, you ask?
According to Merriam-Webster, it's a "usually unintentionally humorous misuse or distortion of a word or phrase." One example of a malapropism can be "Jesus healing those leopards." The intention was "lepers" but, as the two words sound similar, the person accidentally spelled it "leopards."
Egomaniac Chair
When you deserve to sit on the best of the best.
Michael Wave
Portal Potty
A similar phenomena are eggcorns. The same Merriam-Webster dictionary describes them as "a word or phrase that sounds like and is mistakenly used in a seemingly logical or plausible way for another word or phrase either on its own or as part of a set expression."
New Scientist writes that eggcorns are often more satisfying and poetic than the correct word or expression. An example could be "for all intensive purposes" instead of "for all intents and purposes."
"Coughing"... (Also, Really??)
I suppose the person died of the morbid sore throat.
Excessive Bike
I Believe This Is An Oregon
Oh shoot. I can't comment now. My Washington machine just stopped.
Eggcorns originated from the altered form of "acorn". Mark Liberman in his linguistics blog Language Log wrote about a woman who would write "eggcorns" instead of "acorns." Since it didn't fit with other phenomena, such as malapropisms and spoonerisms, he went with linguist Geoffrey Pullum's suggestion to refer to them as "eggcorns."
Fools Ball Table
Three Draffs
Gee. Draffs. Imagine that. Three of them, even.
Shuffle For Sale
It's 2am, the bar just kicked you out and you're selling a shovel on FB. Autocorrect is not your friend
Load More Replies...It would certainly shuffle you if used on you over the head!
There's another strange word – spoonerism. This one is not about spelling or writing. It's an error people make when speaking. A spoonerism happens when a speaker switches the first sounds of two words. The funny meaning is usually not intentional. An example would be “a scoop of boy trouts” instead of “a troop of boy scouts.”
Any Of Y'all Need A Bing Bag?
My cats would let all the bings out of the bag, and they'd be all over the house!
Bob Wire
Someone Is Selling “Access” On Fb
They do allow access into anywhere, yet you have to have a really strong arm
And the origin of spoonerisms is quite hilarious as well. It all started with a clergyman around the 1900s. The poor man would often make such slips as "a blushing crow" instead of "a crushing blow."
Fire Distinguisher
I find this distinguisher to be very extinguished.
Corn Or Sofa
Eucalyptus Machines Are My Favorite
The man's name was William Archibald Spooner. History refers to him as a nervous man and his slips allegedly became the stuff of legends during his lifetime. His last name inspired the official term for such verbal slips as "tons of soil" instead of "sons of toil."
A Beautiful Arm Wall For Sale
Well, technically, those are wings, but who am I to argue with dinosaurs?
Mitch Match Civil Where
Breakfast Nuke For An Explosive Dining Experience!
All meals served here are microwaved. No exceptions!
If we're talking about spelling and verbal mistakes, let's touch upon misheard utterances as well. Remember that TLC song "Waterfalls" and how many of us thought they were singing "Don't go, Jason Waterfalls?" Although there are several threads about it on the r/BoneAppleTea subreddit, technically it's not a malapropism.
Mid Evil Dagger
Amp A Fire
Guaranteed to increase any fire it's added to, but not for long.
Hell Of A Deal On A Porsche!
Another common example of a mondegreen is the Jimmy Hendrix lyric "Excuse me, while I kiss the sky." Many people misheard it as "Excuse me, while I kiss this guy." We call these misheard lyrics ‘mondegreens’. In her piece for The New Yorker, Maria Konnikova describes them as "a misheard word or phrase that makes sense in your head, but is, in fact, entirely incorrect."
Watch Her Machine
Light Savors
Well, they didn't save Luke's hand. Suppose they savored it?
Hearing Loss
The word "mondegreen" originates from journalist Sylvia Wright. She recounted her misheard lyrics on the Scottish folk song 'The Bonny Earl of Morray'. Wright thought the line "Oh, they have slain the Earl o' Morray and laid him on the green" was actually "Oh, they have slain the Earl o' Morray and Lady Mondegreen."
Folder Bull Chairs
No bulls were harmed in the making of these chairs.
What Good Would It Be Without The Mote Control??
Do not remove the mote in your brother's TV when there is a beam in yours.
A Very Fancy Branch
I'm with SmallFlowers. Your comments took this "fun" one to "really funny"
Load More Replies...These are fascinating. Mostly eggcorns rather than misspellings, and a wonderful collection. And yes, they're hilarious, but English is full of bizarre idioms that don't seem to make sense. Why shouldn't "best awful" exist in a language where we "curry favour"?
Then add colloquial to it and it goes off the rails. Cause maybe they didn't not want to.
Load More Replies...Most of these seem like they came from autocorrect or voice to text to me. At least I hope that's the cause
Unfortunately, although that might happen in the minority of cases, the majority of people who post these items have only (mis)heard the names and simply write what they imagine it to be.
Load More Replies...And sadly it's the grossly undereducated that seem to reproduce most abundantly. Another generation or two and humans will have devolved to just grunts and gestures.
Most of these are autocorrect and not checking before you post, but 'draffs'? That took conscious effort.
I've heard people mispronounce words like this and when I corrected them, they were so baffled that they didn't believe me. I remember a girl saying "draffs" for "giraffe", but it was in elementary school.. I think some people who aren't great at reading grow up to be adults and just do not know what the real word is.... especially in the American south in particularly isolated areas, some people are just ... not informed, to put it mildly.
Load More Replies...Originally called 'malapropisms' after a character in a 19th c. British play named Mrs Malaprop. Long before the interwebs (1960s-70s) my mother collected these in a notebook.
I don't get how these happen? Are people that uneducated or do they not spellcheck/proof read things before posting to the world?!
Soell check wouldn't help as they are actual words, and if you don't know that isn't the actual name, proof reading it isn't going to help either. My hairdresser told me she was buying her son a kitten for xmas last year. She'd originally thought of terrapins as a pet but someone had told her that because they like in warm water he could be at risk of semolina poisoning.
Load More Replies...It's not because of "similar sounding words," it's because, generally speaking, most people are fucƙing stupid.
Exhibits 1 through 30 on how various education systems are failing.
I wonder how many of these were posted via "speech -to- text" and the poster didn't look at the results.
One time I saw it as “rot iron” I kid you not
Load More Replies...I would conclude by this that our edjumukation system faled. Yes I spelled them incorrect intentionally.
I'm with SmallFlowers. Your comments took this "fun" one to "really funny"
Load More Replies...These are fascinating. Mostly eggcorns rather than misspellings, and a wonderful collection. And yes, they're hilarious, but English is full of bizarre idioms that don't seem to make sense. Why shouldn't "best awful" exist in a language where we "curry favour"?
Then add colloquial to it and it goes off the rails. Cause maybe they didn't not want to.
Load More Replies...Most of these seem like they came from autocorrect or voice to text to me. At least I hope that's the cause
Unfortunately, although that might happen in the minority of cases, the majority of people who post these items have only (mis)heard the names and simply write what they imagine it to be.
Load More Replies...And sadly it's the grossly undereducated that seem to reproduce most abundantly. Another generation or two and humans will have devolved to just grunts and gestures.
Most of these are autocorrect and not checking before you post, but 'draffs'? That took conscious effort.
I've heard people mispronounce words like this and when I corrected them, they were so baffled that they didn't believe me. I remember a girl saying "draffs" for "giraffe", but it was in elementary school.. I think some people who aren't great at reading grow up to be adults and just do not know what the real word is.... especially in the American south in particularly isolated areas, some people are just ... not informed, to put it mildly.
Load More Replies...Originally called 'malapropisms' after a character in a 19th c. British play named Mrs Malaprop. Long before the interwebs (1960s-70s) my mother collected these in a notebook.
I don't get how these happen? Are people that uneducated or do they not spellcheck/proof read things before posting to the world?!
Soell check wouldn't help as they are actual words, and if you don't know that isn't the actual name, proof reading it isn't going to help either. My hairdresser told me she was buying her son a kitten for xmas last year. She'd originally thought of terrapins as a pet but someone had told her that because they like in warm water he could be at risk of semolina poisoning.
Load More Replies...It's not because of "similar sounding words," it's because, generally speaking, most people are fucƙing stupid.
Exhibits 1 through 30 on how various education systems are failing.
I wonder how many of these were posted via "speech -to- text" and the poster didn't look at the results.
One time I saw it as “rot iron” I kid you not
Load More Replies...I would conclude by this that our edjumukation system faled. Yes I spelled them incorrect intentionally.