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Someone Asked Teachers “What Was Hilarious At The Time That You Absolutely 100% Could Not Laugh At?” And Their Responses Did Not Disappoint (30 Stories)
InterviewTeachers have extremely difficult jobs. The task of molding students into well-informed, productive citizens is a great deal of responsibility, and educators are rarely appreciated enough for all the work they do. One aspect of the job that isn’t often discussed is how professional they must remain when students do and say ridiculous things.
3 months ago, a member of the Ask Reddit community reached out to pose the question, “Teachers, what was hilarious at the time that you absolutely 100% could not laugh at?” The responses are flooded with times teachers had to stifle laughter to stay professional and protect students' feelings, but thankfully, we don’t have to! We’ve compiled a list of some of the best stories for you to read and reminisce on your school days. Below you'll also find an interview with the Reddit user who originally sparked this conversation.
Then if you’re interested in even more hilarious teacher tales, check out Bored Panda’s last piece on the same topic right here.
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I used to teach English to Korean kids. They had to do some writing and one wrote about their pet cat. The family called it pussy. The whole piece was about how much his dad likes pussy.
We reached out to Smoke1000Blunts on Reddit to hear what originally sparked this conversation, and he told us, "I was inspired to ask that question because I was genuinely curious what kind of craziness the average teacher must see on a daily basis. Teachers are expected to be above it all, but surely a side of them is human enough to see the humor in a lot those crazy moments!" He went on to explain, "I am not a teacher; however, my sister is one. She has a lot of crazy stories about parents mainly."
On that note, he mentions that, "Irrational parents are one of if not the hardest thing to deal with as a teacher." He also says that "the encroachment on personal life" that comes along with teaching must be tough too. Lastly, we asked if he would like to say anything to the teachers he had growing up. "I was actually homeschooled up until high school, but as I grow older more and more I see the time they invest into their job, and to do it well. I would just say 'thank you' including my mom."
don't know how my teacher kept a straight face on this tbh....
history teacher would always say "let's get quizzical" when we had a quiz.
one day we had a test so my friend raised his hand "oh Mr m don't you mean 'let's get testical'?"
teacher just said " you can do that on your own time Brian" as our 8th grade class lost our s**t.
The experience of teaching can be vastly different depending on the school, the age group and the subject being taught. I actually have taught many theatre and art classes for ages ranging from 5-14, so I have made many observations about students. One thing to know is that their level of sweetness tends to dissipate as they get older, and their level of sass tends to exponentially increase with age. Young children are so confident when trying new things and much less scared of failure than older students. Once kids reach their pre-teen and teen years, they often develop debilitating insecurities and become embarrassed easily. Yet somehow they still have the energy to make fun of teachers to try to seem cool…
Many of the stories on this list come from children who are still young enough that curiosity just flows freely out of their mouths without any second thoughts of judgment. And while it’s wonderful that these teachers were able to keep their composure enough to respond to students’ questions and concerns professionally, I’m also glad we now get to enjoy these stories. And remember, there is no such thing as a stupid question.
I used to teach 3rd graders (non-native English), and one time one of them ran up to me to tattle on his classmate and said "Teacher, Teacher, Tunwa just said 'F**K YOU!'!!", so Tunwa, who was running behind him goes "No teacher, no!! I only said 'F**K' I didn't say *looks around and starts to whisper* '...you...'"
I was like, "No, no! That's not the bad word, it's the other one!", but I was dying, I had to turn around and go laugh behind a corner.
That is hilarious. I remember when the word "damn" was first allowed on the radio but for some reason "god dammit" was not. Some stations would bleep "god" but keep the "dammit" which I thought was the funniest thing. (I've also heard it on TV with s**t and b******t. Bleeping the "bull" is hilarious.)
Considering how difficult their jobs are, I think teachers deserve to be in a classroom full of tiny stand-up comedians each day. Insider published a piece in 2019 titled “Public-school teachers reveal the 7 hardest things about their job”, and it certainly helps those of us with other professions understand the challenges of teaching. One difficulty many teachers note is the emotional burden of being a teacher. Sometimes, teachers spend more hours in a day with students than their own parents do. So when kids are dealing with a lot at home, teachers are often their only sources of emotional support. One teacher told Insider, “We expect them to come to school and behave a certain way and focus on very abstract things, but many of them are living with so much stress and trauma. For some students, school is the safest, sanest place in their life."
Teacher hears a girl's phone vibrating in her purse and says "I hope that is a phone." Teacher walks another two steps and realizes what she just said. Class erupts in laughter.
Teachers also note dealing with difficult parents as another challenge of the job. Parents often deny that their kids would misbehave in class and sometimes blame the teachers. Standardized tests are another factor that puts pressure on educators. Curriculums are based around standardized tests, which limit teachers’ freedom in their own classrooms. “I would have to say that the most frustrating part of teaching would be all of the testing," one elementary school teacher told Insider. "It won't let kids be kids and it seems as if you are always doing it." These exams put pressure on students as well, having the power to hold kids back a year if they don’t perform well on the tests.
Two middle school boys came to to me to tell me they were calling themselves “eunuchs”. Startled I just asked “excuse me?”
They went on to explain that eunuch was short for “unique”. So I wrote the word down on a piece of paper and told them to go look it up in the dictionary and suggested they not call themselves that out loud anymore.
So they go to the dictionary, find the word and very loudly ask “what’s castrated mean?”
After they looked it up they couldn’t look me in the face for a couple days but it was my favorite day ever.
Two 8-year-olds got into a tiff. Kid #1 got mad at kid #2. In typical 8-year-old fashion, kid #1 told kid #2, “I’m not your friend any more and you’re not invited to any more of my birthday parties.” Kid #2 responded, “I only went to your party for the cake.”
Lastly, teachers tend to be overworked and underpaid. Grading papers and making lesson plans are just a couple examples of teachers’ responsibilities that often can’t be accomplished during the time they are actually in the classroom. And teachers receive notoriously low salaries. One teacher from Virginia told Insider, “The last time I checked, we are ranked 38th in the nation when it comes to teacher pay. My district froze my steps for seven years when the Great Recession hit. I should be making at least $12,000 to $15,000 more today based on the scale that I agreed to when I first started teaching. Instead, all we get are 1% or 2% raises here and there. I had to short sell my house, which was extremely difficult on my children." Though they love their students, teachers should be valued and cherished by their communities. That should start with receiving proper compensation.
I asked my kindergartners if anyone knew what a period was (while teaching sentence punctuation) and one boy enthusiastically says “yeah, my mom has them in the bathroom!!”
I’m a history teacher. We were looking in the textbook at a section on the founding fathers. Several of them had their own subheadings and a little paragraph about them. Like this:
George Washington (1732-1799)
Thomas Jefferson (1743-1826)
Benjamin Franklin (1707-1790)
I then have a student raise their hand and ask, completely serious, “If you call these numbers, do they still work?”
She thought their birth and death dates were their phone numbers. I teach high school, the class lost their s**t, and it took everything in me to keep a straight face.
Student - Alaska is a state? Are you sure? It doesn’t even touch the states…
Me - Yes, I’m sure.
Student - I need to look this up to be sure.
Me - You really don’t, but go ahead.
Student 2 - wait, states don’t have to touch? Does that mean Hawaii is a state.
Student 3 - What about New Mexico?
I teach high school.
My son was born in 2001. When he was in 8th or 9th grade on September 11, I mentioned that I was feeling sad that day. He seemed really confused and after I asked him some questions I realized he had never been taught in his school about what happened that day. I was shocked shitless. Immediately I sat him down and educated him about the things that happened on September 11, 2001.
Being a teacher isn’t all bad though. While it is not the path for everyone, being an educator can be extremely rewarding. One of the main reasons most teachers pursued the career in the first place is because they are passionate about making a difference in the lives of others. While every young person passes through the school system, teachers have amazing opportunities to demonstrate important values and imprint lifelong knowledge into the minds of youths. I think everyone remembers an exceptional teacher they had that really inspired them or encouraged them to pursue their passions. Teachers also have the change to open students up to new perspectives that they might not be exposed to at home.
Field trip instructor. I was leading a discussion on food chains with some 4th graders and asked what we call animals that only eat plants.
The answer I got was virgins.
Edit: I heard a lot of funny things in that job. The other funniest one was when I was going over cardinal directions with 2nd graders. I had them all chanting "never eat soggy waffles" or "sour worms" or whatever they liked to say, and just as they all quiet down one of them says "never eat Santa's wife".
That was the only time in 7 years working with kids that I completely lost it in front of a classroom, children teachers and parents. It took me about 30 seconds to regain composure, and even then I kept cracking up through the rest of the lesson. The kids thought it was funny because it was silly, the parents knew why I really thought it was so funny.
When I taught first grade kid #1 says kid #2 said the B word. I inquired what was the B word? Kid #1 says Bagina.
Had to clench my teeth together to keep from laughing.
Daaang, bored panda is slacking with its censoring
Load More Replies...Reminds me of a certain Seinfeld episode where he thought a woman was named "Mulva."
I can hear it now. "Delores?!?!? What rhymes with Delores!!!!"
Load More Replies...Had a similar thing happen to me: Kid 1: Kid 2 called me the R word! Me: (wanting to be sure) Can you tell me exactly what he said? Kid 1: (whispering) Arsehole.
I had a third-grade student confide in me that another student had said the "S" word. In third grade, the "S" word is "stupid".
My 5-year-old brother thought that the word for "vagina" was "bagina" and he kept yelling it in the streets to p--s me off.
We were doing a lab testing density of objects - including wooden, rubber, and styrofoam balls.
In the middle of class a student loudly yells out, “Stop touching my balls!”
I legitimately couldn’t breathe for a minute.
Imagine the face drop the teacher would have had if the kid meant their real balls. 😂 🤣………😮😧🤭
According to the University of Kansas, another perk of becoming a teacher is the variety each day includes. Rather than simply sitting at a desk and typing on a computer, teachers get to really interact with students and provide a space for new ideas and creativity to flourish. Even if a teacher is dedicated to one topic, each class will share different ideas and perspectives. Compared to many other jobs, teachers get to see a wide variety of people each day and form relationships with them. Seeing students experience “lightbulb moments” and watching their progress throughout a semester are great motivators for many educators.
I was helping a third grader who didn't want to work on his subtraction of three digit numbers that required borrowing. I told him, "Fine. Never learn to do this. Then I'm going to open a store that sells things you absolutely love, and when you give me your money, I'll just randomly hand you back change that is less than you should actually get because you can't do the math to figure it out...so I'll just take all your money."
He looked at me dead in the eyes for a few seconds before stating, "That's b******t."
I had to hold back laughter for about a good 20 seconds before I could reply, "You're right, so learn to do addition and subtraction and you won't have to worry about it."
In a freshmen history class you hear a lot of cursing. I usually let it go but if I heard “f**k” too loudly I would call them out and make them give me another word instead. This kid looked at me totally panicked for several seconds before loudly blurting out “BISCUITS!” The whole class got a kick out it and the rest of the year they used the word biscuits in place of various curse words. They got very creative lol.
After school program staff here. Keep in mind this is a middle school. One day a student was standing next to me as I was taking attendance. Usually I had my kids line up on the basketball court while I did this. When I finished I turned to the kid and said "Let's roll." And started walking. As I approached my line I heard him yell behind me. I turned to see him ROLLING ON THE FLOOR LIKE A ROTISSERIE HOTDOG. He looked up at me with the most stern face and said "You said to roll!" Why yes ...yes I did Daniel.
Some other perks of being a teacher are the job security and vacations. Well-trained and qualified teachers are always in high demand, and as the University of Kansas mentions, mobility in the field is also common. One can begin as a teacher and work their way up to an administrative position or even a social worker, if those paths seem more appealing. Those who work in schools are also provided excellent vacation times, usually with a significant chunk off in the summer months and a gap over the holidays as well. Being able to take time off provides educators with opportunities for rest and to enjoy some quality time with loved ones.
The time a fourth grader asked me to show him my dong. Loudly. In front of his entire class.
I’m a music teacher. And a female. He meant he wanted to see a gong.
Kids were on laptops and one group was talking about life of Brian and of course biggus d**kus.
Kid 1 "Google it, Google it, it's really funny!"
Kid 2 "But won't it be rude?"
Kid 1 "no, it's old and funny and no swearing so it's fine"
A few seconds later manic screaming from kid 2. He had instead googled big d**k. We all had a good laugh at his misfortune in the staff room.
Not a teacher. All names changed for privacy reasons.
In high school we had one kid, let's call him Tony. Tony was your typical emo kid, but one time he came to class stoned out of his goddamn mind. I'm talking your stereotypical bloodshot eyes, cagey anxious, reeks of pot kind of stoned. He sits down, and I just look at him, shake my head, and whisper "dude, are you serious?"
He immediately realises that its plain as day, and kinda pathetically whines "please don't tell Mr. Andrews".
Now, Mr. Andrews was a former decently high ranking military officer who turned to teaching WWII history and Civics. Awesome dude, sharp as a tack. He was the kind of teacher that would go the extra mile to help you with anything, so long as you kept it straight with him. Amazing sense of humour.
Anyway, Mr. Andrews walks into class, and his eyes furrow, and its obvious he can smell the pot emanating from poor Tony, but plays it cool. Mr. Andrews isn't stupid, and knows what some teens gets up to. Unless you're rude with him, he'll enact his punishments by playing mind games.
He called on Tony for every single damn question he was asking the class, doing his best not to smile too much, and we were ALL collectively holding in our laughter.
Poor Tony was a deer in headlights. It was beautiful to watch.
Eventually, it's near the end of class, and Mr. Andrews is wrapping up the day's lesson, and turns to face the class, looking at Tony.
"Now, I know we've all had a bunch of fun today, but I want to make it abundantly clear. I get it, I was your age too, and I'm not going to lie and say that I'm immune from the allure of a nice relaxing evening every so often. "
He also pulled Tony aside after class and apparently told him that school rules mean he has to report it to the school resource officer by the end of the day, and that it would be very unfortunate for there to be any evidence of his wrongdoing in his locker.
Love that teacher.
Edit: fixed names
It’s long been known that children are innate comedians. Just look at the success of the 1990’s television show Kids Say The Darndest Things, which featured a host posing questions about life topics to children and the kids sharing their own creative (and unintentionally hilarious) perspectives. Perhaps part of the reason we find children so funny, when they are just sharing their thoughts, is because they repeat what they hear adults say. Certain things just are a lot less funny when coming out of the mouths of grown ups. For example, one time when I was babysitting a 4-year-old girl, we started jumping on her trampoline. She was having a great time, so she told me, “Wow! I haven’t had this much fun in years!” …..Well, yeah. “You’ve only been alive for 4, and I doubt you remember the first 2 very well,” I thought. But I found her hilarious, and she was only sharing a sincere thought.
I had a kid who got extremely angry because I told him that he couldn’t do something (don’t remember what). He started stomping and screaming and became so angry that he dropped his pants and stood there in his underwear glaring at me. I wanted to laugh so bad but it would have just pissed him off more and that would not have helped the situation.
Props to the teacher for not laughing. I would have died then and there 🤣
5 year old starts randomly bawling. Quite concerned, I rush over and ask what's wrong. She holds up a single hair and says her hair is falling out and she's going bald. I had to explain that hair falls out naturally but new hair takes it's place.
Once had a 5th grader bawling in class. A group of his classmates were trying to comfort him, and one of them goes: "You're too young, they can't arrest you." Turns out he had buttdialed the emergency number and was convinced he was going to jail for contacting emergency services unecessarily (which can happen, but not in those circumstances).
I was on cafeteria duty in my high schooland one table was starting to throw stuff so I went over to tell them to stop. They did, but to be annoying, they started pretending to throw stuff.
I gave them a look and they started pointing at a girl at their table who was just quietly eating her lunch, shouting "she's throwing stuff! Kick her out of here!"
Before I could say tell her that I obviously know she wasn't doing anything, she stands up indignantly and says "no! I'm just SITTING here, trying to EAT MY SALAD!"
She just sounded so offended at being accused, she was so indignant. I lost it, to the point where I had to walk away because I was laughing so hard. The kids were like "Um, is he ok? I think we broke him." By the time I regained my composure, I just walked back and told her that I know she didn't do anything.
Sometimes she'll still come up to me in the halls and be like "hey Mr. G, guess what I have for lunch? I'm gonna be sitting there, trying to eat my salad!"
I’m exactly like that girl. In real life if somebody accused me of something and I didn’t do it I’d be yelling my head off about how innocent I am.
For some reason, children acting like adults is highly entertaining. Their minds can be so powerful; kids are smarter than they often get credit for. Yet sometimes, their lack of life experience is adorably hilarious. Similar to the American show Kids Say The Darndest Things, another popular Japanese show featuring hilarious kids has been running since the early 90s.
The hit show is Old Enough! The basic premise is that producers task toddlers with “grown-up activities” like running errands, grocery shopping, riding on public transit, etc., and leave them alone to embark on the activities. Camera crews secretly film the children, and producers go to great lengths behind the scenes to ensure the safety of participants. But the final product is a hilariously entertaining show.
Had a child wandering round the class room holding something to his chest, all the children were laughing. Asked him to turn around.
He had a piece of paper with 2 nipples drawn it and was holding it to his chest like they were his actual nipples. That took a lot of restraint not to laugh out loud at, but I gave him the usual speech of it not being appropriate.
The next day he did the exact same thing with a drawing of a belly button instead. That time I did laugh.
I was a phlebotomy instructor (sorry not a “teacher teacher”) and one of my students(fresh outta hs) was practicing on an elderly patient and he asked her if she was going to take all of his blood. She responded quite joyfully “yes, I’m gonna suck you dryyy!” The old man got the funniest surprised look on his face and I about lost it but somehow kept it together. Oh man, the look in her face and the 50 shades of red she turned after she realized how that came across….absolutely priceless. Will never forget that
I’d let my 9th graders draw on the board for a minute before class let out. They were all chuckling one day as they left so I was sure they’d left a hell of a present. Sure enough, the most beautiful drawing of a marbled salamander doing the philosoraptor pose with the caption in cursive, “do salamanders eat a*s?”
It was honestly a beautiful, anatomically accurate drawing. I just erased the caption and wrote “bruh” instead and left it for the next day
The stars of Old Enough! are incredibly young, ranging from two to four years old at the time of filming. The first episode, which aired in 1991, featured a 2-year-old named Hiroki being sent by his mother to a local supermarket to purchase fish cakes, curry and a bouquet of flowers. Somehow, he completes the task and is brimming with pride in the end. One of viewers’ favorite aspects of the show is the huge increase in confidence the children receive after being able to successfully accomplish jobs they previously imagined were only for adults.
I used to supervise kids.
One time I saw a tiny little kid go full sprint, probably 15 yard sprint across the field, and he attempted to drop kick this one behemoth of a kid.
Sprinter kid looked like he tried drop kicking a brick wall. Behemoth kid looked like a fly just landed on him.
I wish I got it on video.
We were playing a phonics game. There were two teams; one person from each team had to say a rhyming word of the word that I said. I said “pick”, a student said “d**k”. I’m thankful the rest of the class didn’t know what that was.
First grader wrote: I want to be an astronaut because you get to sit upside down.
I want to be an astronaut to represent my nation, to do scientific experiments requiring 0g and the reason this kid wants to be
Despite how much children learn from adults, I think we can learn a thing or two from them too. Their unbridled curiosity and lack of fear are wonderful character traits to have, even if they do lead to hilarious situations for their elders. Enjoy the rest of these comically innocent quotes from students, and don't forget to upvote your favorite stories. Then let us know in the comments if you have any personal stories of your own children or children you've taught being unintentional comedians!
Time was up for a test and I had to collect them. Cue 11th grade girl start yelling "no wait, I'm almost done. I'm coming, I'm coming!"
I teach middle school intensive sped.
Girl 1 is very loud with behavior issues and is verbally mean towards other kids. Girl 2 was telling me about how she was mad once and used bad words and her mom washed her mouth out with soap. She said "if girl 1 doesn't change then she has soap coming to her".
It was the funniest thing.
I was substitute teaching a middle school gym class, and some kid got hit in the nuts with a soccer ball.
I had another student tell me he was the alpha male of my classroom.
I was teaching a lesson about racial prejudice in history. Showed the children one of the signs outside a house in the 1940s offering rooms for rent that said "No children, no dogs, no Irish". We discussed this and the class agreed that children could be noisy and that dogs could bark and make a mess. So what about "no Irish"? I asked. Loooong pause, not a clue, till finally one hand goes up at the back of the class: " Is it the accent?"
When I was teaching in a UK high school, I had to do emergency cover for a teacher who was taken ill at work. They were a class I hadn't met before (big school). I was doing the register and about half way down I got to the second girl named "Paige". So I asked, "How do you normally work this? Are you Paige 1 and Paige 2?" At this moment, another lass piped up from the back row, "I am NOT being Paige 3!*" Big belly laughs by all present, including all three Paiges. * note for non UK and younger readers. There used to be a thing in the UK of certain tabloid newspapers having a "glamour photo" on Page 3. It is now a thing of the past.
I teach in a self contained program for kids labeled as highly aggressive. For the most part, I’ve trained my kids to practice positive social skills when with me. But sometimes if a kid if having a day or skipped meds, they’ll say or do some pretty wild things. Anyways. One day Girl was standing next to me at recess. She had been pretty off that day, so I had asked her to chat with me about her weekend to keep her close. It was time to go inside so I put my hand up to signal the other kids to line up. Boy sees my hand and ignores it. Girl sees that and looks at me and says “That boy saw your hand. He SAW your hand and ignored you. That boy is being rude to you. I’m gonna break his arm.” Everyone was fine, girl went to the social worker for a bit. To date, that’s the wildest thing that I’ve heard.
I used to go to a board game group that had both adults and children. One day I ate a peanut slab (chocolate bar with peanuts in) and a ~10yr old loudly proclaimed that now my breath would smell of nuts.
I worked with a 5 year old who learned that he could get big laughs from the older kids by saying "deez nuts" .... It was so hard not to laugh and reinforce him to keep saying it 😂
I was at the back of room while a teacher was teaching spelling rules for ING. She asked for verbs, kid with a new dog at home shouted 'dog' I say dog is not a verb, child next to him nods wisely and says dogging. Teacher promptly leaves room asking me to take over, which is hard with her laughing so loudly outside.
Not a teacher, but have a funny story. My high school western civilization teacher once had a kid ask when the pubic war ended. He had misheard the teacher say punic war, and only realized he'd gotten it wrong when everyone else started laughing.
Anyone else's BP no longer showing notifications and alerts? When people respond to your posts?
"Kids Say the Darndest Things" might have been reprised in the 1990s, but the original TV show was during the 1950s.
Only amusing in retrospect. Circa 1980 a local trade school hired me to teach computer programming. The school shut down the next day. Was I only a convenient liability in their bankruptcy filing?
When I was in 5th grade our class was reviewing nouns. We were saying like, walked, ran, hopped, and then one girl in the back said: DYING
I was a teacher in an after school facility. Near the end of the day, I would do front office duty. After one holiday, we had extra candy left, so I gave it out to the kids all through the week. The next week, on my way to the front office, I walked through the gym, where all the classes gathered for the last hour or so, both hands full. A six year old boy stops me and said, “Hi, Miss P, do you have any caannndy,” while emphasizing it by putting his hands on my breasts…I was stunned, but it was funny as heck. Everyone was cracking up…I didn’t make s big deal of it, but I really wanted to laugh. He didn’t “grab” me with any nefarious intent, just a 6 year old who wanted more candy! I think it was the long, drawn out “caaaannndy” that made so hilarious!
I taught English or 20 years. Adults only. Once, during the soccer world cup, one of my students said, "Today, Brazil is playing against the turkeys" - might have been an interesting game!
I was teaching a lesson about racial prejudice in history. Showed the children one of the signs outside a house in the 1940s offering rooms for rent that said "No children, no dogs, no Irish". We discussed this and the class agreed that children could be noisy and that dogs could bark and make a mess. So what about "no Irish"? I asked. Loooong pause, not a clue, till finally one hand goes up at the back of the class: " Is it the accent?"
When I was teaching in a UK high school, I had to do emergency cover for a teacher who was taken ill at work. They were a class I hadn't met before (big school). I was doing the register and about half way down I got to the second girl named "Paige". So I asked, "How do you normally work this? Are you Paige 1 and Paige 2?" At this moment, another lass piped up from the back row, "I am NOT being Paige 3!*" Big belly laughs by all present, including all three Paiges. * note for non UK and younger readers. There used to be a thing in the UK of certain tabloid newspapers having a "glamour photo" on Page 3. It is now a thing of the past.
I teach in a self contained program for kids labeled as highly aggressive. For the most part, I’ve trained my kids to practice positive social skills when with me. But sometimes if a kid if having a day or skipped meds, they’ll say or do some pretty wild things. Anyways. One day Girl was standing next to me at recess. She had been pretty off that day, so I had asked her to chat with me about her weekend to keep her close. It was time to go inside so I put my hand up to signal the other kids to line up. Boy sees my hand and ignores it. Girl sees that and looks at me and says “That boy saw your hand. He SAW your hand and ignored you. That boy is being rude to you. I’m gonna break his arm.” Everyone was fine, girl went to the social worker for a bit. To date, that’s the wildest thing that I’ve heard.
I used to go to a board game group that had both adults and children. One day I ate a peanut slab (chocolate bar with peanuts in) and a ~10yr old loudly proclaimed that now my breath would smell of nuts.
I worked with a 5 year old who learned that he could get big laughs from the older kids by saying "deez nuts" .... It was so hard not to laugh and reinforce him to keep saying it 😂
I was at the back of room while a teacher was teaching spelling rules for ING. She asked for verbs, kid with a new dog at home shouted 'dog' I say dog is not a verb, child next to him nods wisely and says dogging. Teacher promptly leaves room asking me to take over, which is hard with her laughing so loudly outside.
Not a teacher, but have a funny story. My high school western civilization teacher once had a kid ask when the pubic war ended. He had misheard the teacher say punic war, and only realized he'd gotten it wrong when everyone else started laughing.
Anyone else's BP no longer showing notifications and alerts? When people respond to your posts?
"Kids Say the Darndest Things" might have been reprised in the 1990s, but the original TV show was during the 1950s.
Only amusing in retrospect. Circa 1980 a local trade school hired me to teach computer programming. The school shut down the next day. Was I only a convenient liability in their bankruptcy filing?
When I was in 5th grade our class was reviewing nouns. We were saying like, walked, ran, hopped, and then one girl in the back said: DYING
I was a teacher in an after school facility. Near the end of the day, I would do front office duty. After one holiday, we had extra candy left, so I gave it out to the kids all through the week. The next week, on my way to the front office, I walked through the gym, where all the classes gathered for the last hour or so, both hands full. A six year old boy stops me and said, “Hi, Miss P, do you have any caannndy,” while emphasizing it by putting his hands on my breasts…I was stunned, but it was funny as heck. Everyone was cracking up…I didn’t make s big deal of it, but I really wanted to laugh. He didn’t “grab” me with any nefarious intent, just a 6 year old who wanted more candy! I think it was the long, drawn out “caaaannndy” that made so hilarious!
I taught English or 20 years. Adults only. Once, during the soccer world cup, one of my students said, "Today, Brazil is playing against the turkeys" - might have been an interesting game!