We’re all well aware of the fact that planning a wedding can be stressful. It will hopefully be worth it, if it culminates in one of the happiest days of your life, but often, attending weddings is even more fun than having one. All you have to do is get dressed up, bring a nice gift and be in a great mood all evening while supporting your friends. Piece of cake!

But one couple decided that it would be a good idea to put their wedding guests to work in the kitchen. Below, you’ll find the full story that a friend of theirs recently posted on Reddit, as well as a conversation with Jhona Yellin, Editor at Bespoke Bride!

Many brides and grooms look for ways to cut costs when wedding planning

Image credits: prostooleh / Freepik (not the actual photo)

But when her friends proposed the idea of putting their wedding guests to work, this woman could not be supportive

Image credits: Racool_studio / Freepik (not the actual photo)

Image credits: ICanToteIt91

Later, the friend responded to several readers and provided more information about the situation

Image credits: Esperanza Doronila / Unsplash (not the actual photo)

Food and drinks often take up a substantial part of a couple’s wedding budget

Your wedding day can easily be the most expensive day of your life. In fact, the average cost of a wedding in the United States in 2023 was a whopping $35,000, The Knot reports. And unsurprisingly, a large chunk of that often goes towards the food budget. After all, the easiest way to keep your wedding guests happy is to make sure that they’re well fed!

According to The Knot, brides and grooms typically spend about $85 per wedding guest on catering. So if a wedding will have about 50 guests, the price for keeping their stomachs full might be around $4,250. And that’s without considering the cost of alcohol, which couples tend to spend about $2,800 on. 

But nobody likes to be hangry, so brides and grooms often find it worth it to spend a large portion of their budget on food. In fact, 62% of engaged couples say that food and drinks are the most important thing to them when planning their weddings. Three quarters of couples also want to ensure that their guests are well taken care of and enjoy their experience at the wedding, so great catering is often an integral part of that.

While guests are responsible for much less than the happy couple, attending a wedding can be expensive as well. From buying a gift, to finding the perfect outfit to traveling to the venue and booking a hotel, a weekend celebrating a close friend can quickly cost hundreds. Apparently, the average cost of attending a wedding in 2023 was $580 per guest.  

And most friends of the bride and groom are looking for a deal when they have to travel for a wedding, as The Knot found that 85% consider price the most important feature when finding accommodation for a wedding. Despite being convenient, it seems that the hotel the happy couple suggests isn’t always the most affordable option, so guests aren’t always willing to shell out for it.

Image credits: wirestock / Freepik (not the actual photo)

“The important thing is making sure guests feel comfortable and appreciated, not burdened”

To learn more about what options brides and grooms have in situations like this one, we reached out to wedding expert Jhona Yellin, Editor at Bespoke Bride. Jhona was kind enough to have a chat with Bored Panda and discuss whether or not it’s fair to ask something like this of wedding guests.

“On one hand, asking guests to stay at a specific resort can simplify the logistics of a wedding, making it easier to bring everyone together. It creates a cozy vibe, and the sense of togetherness can be wonderful—like a little village of people who all mean something to you, there to celebrate your BIG day,” the editor says.

“However, not everyone has the same budget, so a pricey resort could alienate guests who might already be stretching their wallets just to attend. If a single accommodation option is a must, it’s considerate for the couple to either chip in to cover costs or, at the very least, offer a range of affordable alternatives nearby,” Jhona continued. “The important thing is making sure guests feel comfortable and appreciated, not burdened. We covered lately a beautiful wedding at a resort in Mexico, where the couple and their guests probably had similar issues.”

Next, we wanted to hear the expert’s thoughts on having wedding guests help out in the kitchen. “[This idea] may sound endearing, but it’s a plan with potential for serious chaos. Between timing, dietary needs, and the reality of preparing meals for a large group, things can quickly go from charming to stressful,” she told Bored Panda.

“Some of the best weddings are those where the food is unique and thoughtful, rather than fancy”

“Instead, hiring a unique catering option can keep the spirit of fun without the kitchen disasters. Food trucks, for instance, offer variety and a relaxed vibe, from gourmet tacos to wood-fired pizzas. Or, consider a specialized vendor, like a dessert truck or a charcuterie service, which adds personality and keeps things easy on the budget,” the editor suggests. “This way, guests can enjoy memorable bites without anyone burning out (or burning dinner). If you’re looking for more inspo, read our post about unique wedding catering ideas.”

Jhona also says that it’s absolutely possible for couples on tight budgets to keep their guests full and happy. “Buffet-style meals, food trucks as I mentioned above, or family-style sharing platters are affordable and create a communal feel,” she shared.

“Alternatively, serving hearty appetizers or grazing boards instead of a full dinner is a stylish way to ensure everyone’s well-fed without breaking the bank. Some of the best weddings are those where the food is unique and thoughtful, rather than fancy. If you plan to DIY your wedding catering – read this.”

We would love to hear your thoughts on this situation in the comments below, pandas. Do you think it’s reasonable for this couple to expect their guests to cook all of the food for their wedding? Feel free to share, and then if you’re interested in checking out another article discussing wedding drama, we recommend this one next!

Many readers were appalled by the bride and groom’s idea

Some even chimed in with similar experiences of their own

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