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Woman Gets Bashed For Not Mentioning Her Brother Is Dead After Coworker Spread Rumors About Him
Being vulnerable and opening up to colleagues can be beneficial. It fosters an authentic work environment, creates connections, and strengthens the team. However, not everyone is comfortable sharing sensitive information with coworkers from the get-go. Drawing such boundaries if one is feeling discomfort is completely fine, and should be respected by others.
Unfortunately for redditor BereavedTriplet0522, when she wanted to keep her personal things to herself, instead of understanding her team members made a scandal. Troubled by this, she turned to the AITAH subreddit, asking if withholding the fact that her triplet brother passed away was wrong.
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Not everyone is comfortable sharing sensitive information with coworkers
Image credits: Sam Lion / pexels (not the actual photo)
When this woman wanted to keep personal things to herself, it unfortunately led to a big scandal
Image credits: Ivan Babydov / pexels (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Antoni Shkraba / pexels (not the actual photo)
Image credits: BereavedTriplet0522
Many still experience invisible blockages that stop us from sharing sensitive information
The mindset that vulnerability equals weakness is slowly but surely becoming outdated. However, opening up to people is easier said than done. Many of us still experience invisible blockages that stop us from sharing sensitive information about ourselves, let alone doing so in a work environment.
“I wish all professionals knew that vulnerability in the workplace could be a powerful tool, not just a sign of weakness. It’s important to create a culture where people feel safe and comfortable being vulnerable. It leads to more open communication, trust and connection between colleagues,” says Emma Williams, a certified career coach.
Indeed, being open in professional environments has a lot of benefits. It normalizes emotions and fosters psychological safety. Team leaders who show vulnerability are seen more as human beings, which makes them instantly more relatable and authentic. As Williams mentioned, this further breeds trust and connection, two key components of collaborative and high-performance teams.
Common acts of vulnerability include asking for help, sharing something personal, trying something new, admitting to not knowing certain things or making a mistake, contributing to a discussion, and receiving feedback.
Image credits: Elina Sazonova / pexels (not the actual photo)
Opening up at work doesn’t have to mean disclosing too much of your personal information
However, for those hesitant to share personal things or wondering how much disclosing is too much, author, podcast host, and vulnerability researcher Brené Brown says, “Vulnerability minus boundaries is not vulnerability.”
What she means by it is that opening up at professional workplaces doesn’t have to mean disclosing too much of your personal matters. “Are you sharing your emotions and your experiences to move your work, connection or relationship forward? Or are you working your [stuff] out with somebody? Work is not a place to do that.”
Drawing boundaries at work includes sharing information, emotions, and experiences only with the colleagues you deem appropriate. If you feel that opening up is the right thing to do, it should be done with the singular aim of improving work-related matters.
Knowing when to be vulnerable and in what amounts is important, as showing your emotional side in an unsupportive environment can lead to ridicule, criticism, or rejection. Even in more enlightened workplaces, exposing personal lives and admitting mistakes and failures can be uncomfortable and stressful for many people. However, with established boundaries, showing vulnerability can result in positive outcomes.
Image credits: Tima Miroshnichenko / pexels (not the actual photo)
The author provided more information in the comments
Some readers justified the author’s behavior and even gave reccmendations
Meanwhile, others thought both sides to be wrong
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What do you think ?
Auntriarch 4 months ago
I do sometimes wonder about the ESH replies. Even if you thought OP could have worded it better than "unavailable", under what sun does this make him even a tiny fraction of an AH?
V 4 months ago
If I wanted to be set up with someone and the person doing the setting up says they're unavailable I would assume in a relationship or gay... This is just baths*t crazy.
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Jill Rhodry 4 months ago
The yta comments - 1) why should she deny the existence of her brother, whether he's dead or alive, she is a triplet and he is her brother 2) saying up front that a sibling has died can be traumatic if it's close to a memorial day or if you're just having an off day in general and can be viewed as trauma dumping and inviting questions or worse, pity - how about people just mind their business.
Amused panda 4 months ago
And 3) until you know people better, you don't know how awkward they will get with you, embarrassed at having asked and not knowing what to say (it is not just the perception of trauma dumping or pity reactions) and you don't know if they might have recently suffered a loss too which is raw for them.
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Ace 4 months ago
How old are these people? Sounds like the sort of thing most people grow out of when they finish high school.
Negatoris Wrecks 4 months ago (edited)
Disabled person here. I have spent a ridiculous time in clinics and hospitals. Those med workers from the ground up gossip loudly and frequently and put highschoolers to shame. One time I sat for 2 hours for an xray with a feactured spine because they forgot I was there and were busy gossiping about someone's divorce and watching cow videos.
Load More Replies... Auntriarch 4 months ago
I do sometimes wonder about the ESH replies. Even if you thought OP could have worded it better than "unavailable", under what sun does this make him even a tiny fraction of an AH?
V 4 months ago
If I wanted to be set up with someone and the person doing the setting up says they're unavailable I would assume in a relationship or gay... This is just baths*t crazy.
Load More Replies... Jill Rhodry 4 months ago
The yta comments - 1) why should she deny the existence of her brother, whether he's dead or alive, she is a triplet and he is her brother 2) saying up front that a sibling has died can be traumatic if it's close to a memorial day or if you're just having an off day in general and can be viewed as trauma dumping and inviting questions or worse, pity - how about people just mind their business.
Amused panda 4 months ago
And 3) until you know people better, you don't know how awkward they will get with you, embarrassed at having asked and not knowing what to say (it is not just the perception of trauma dumping or pity reactions) and you don't know if they might have recently suffered a loss too which is raw for them.
Load More Replies... Ace 4 months ago
How old are these people? Sounds like the sort of thing most people grow out of when they finish high school.
Negatoris Wrecks 4 months ago (edited)
Disabled person here. I have spent a ridiculous time in clinics and hospitals. Those med workers from the ground up gossip loudly and frequently and put highschoolers to shame. One time I sat for 2 hours for an xray with a feactured spine because they forgot I was there and were busy gossiping about someone's divorce and watching cow videos.
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