Entitlement comes in all shapes and sizes, from rude behavior to ridiculous demands. Annoying to those on the receiving end, at a distance, it can be comical to see and hear the bizarre leaps in logic people will make to justify their beliefs. But sometimes it goes too far.

A woman shared her experience with an unhinged, infertile stepmother that demanded her step-daughter hand over her newborn. Citing a variety of fake concerns, “helpful” advice, and weird demands, she attempted to talk OP into just giving her the child, backed up by OP’s rather unhelpful father.

There does not seem to be a limit to what an entitled person thinks should be theirs

Image credits: Omar Lopez (not the actual photo)

One new mother shared her experience with her stepmom that really wanted to take her child

Image credits: Ashwin Vaswani (not the actual photo)

Image source: Ashamed-Leg7206

The mechanics of a step-family can lead to many misunderstandings

Image credits: Monstera (not the actual photo)

Perhaps one reason so many people turn to the internet for advice or at least to vent is the uncertainty of how to assess and understand the behavior of a step-parent in general. In the past, these sorts of family structures were less common and often not explored in popular media or general discourse. Now, for example, around half of all US households are families that are remarried or recoupled. Because the precise “layout” of these families will all differ and the remarriage can happen at a variety of different times, this can create a lot of uncertainty about how to go about navigating difficulties, boundaries, and obligations. In short, family drama is hard enough, but once “family” gets obfuscated, even more challenges arise.

The other challenge comes from the fact that in a “remarried” or “recoupled” family, there might be conflicting opinions about responsibilities. Biological siblings tend to have a mutual understanding towards each other, while parent-child relationships also follow a set of norms. In OP’s case, the stepmother might be overestimating her place and her stepdaughter’s responsibilities. Of course, there is basically nothing about her demands that make sense, but even if she was more reasonable, it’s easy enough to see where difficulties might arise.

Bad boundaries are a recipe for disaster

Image credits: Liza Summer (not the actual photo)

Of course, this is assuming a normal familial misunderstanding, as what OP’s stepmother is demanding is beyond ludicrous. This might be a rare case of inter-familial “Karen” behavior, as this level of entitlement doesn’t normally happen inside a family. We see all the “normal” Karen tricks on display, the nagging, explaining to OP how her, preposterous, plan is actually better. Her delusional behavior is visible further in the post where, for some reason, she is building a nursery. Here there are two possibilities, either that she sincerely believes that OP will just hand over a child, or that this act, which no doubt took time and effort, would “guilt” OP into sharing custody. It’s somewhat hard to decide which option is “better,” as both delusion and manipulation are pretty concerning.

In general, it seems that the boundaries between OP and her step-mother are deeply unclear and her biological father is not taking good steps to enforce them. Fortunately, where her father is slacking, her partner is doing his job. This unclarity will probably manifest itself again in the future, so OP is best served by taking preventative measures to make sure her stepmother remains at a distance and has no legal access to her or the child. Fortunately, they live in another country, so they can’t just show up beyond frequently taking flights. Similarly, the stepmother can’t just take the child on a plane, which should be some comfort to OP. But the comments are correct, all in all, she needs to limit contact with her father and his chosen partner.

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OP gave some more details in the comments

Other readers shared advice and shock at the step-mother’s behavior

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