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Someone Asked “What Did A Friend Do That Made You End Your Friendship With Them?”, 35 People Delivered
Very few things feel as fulfilling as time spent with a close friend. Partly because friends tend to care about one another - being there for each other through their ups and downs, also allowing some mistakes and weaknesses. However, it is said that a friend in need is a friend indeed - a person one considered their friend ditching them when "the world is at its worst" being just one example of behavior that might lead to reconsidering the friendship. For some, it might be having 120 cats in the house. These people shared experiences of this sort, answering one Redditor’s question: “What’s something a friend did that made you end your friendship with them?”
More info: Reddit
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#1
After talking to a guy I liked, we found out my 'best friend" was telling both of us that the other person didn't like us/found us annoying. He would ask her to invite me to parties, and she'd tell him I couldn't come, or that I said no and that he annoyed me. She'd tell me that he didn't invite me because he thought I was annoying. All because she liked him but wouldn't admit it to anyone.
When we finally realized, we got together and stopped being friends with her. We've been together for 11 years now!
Sergio Bicerra 1 year ago
I want to believe they got together cause a common enemy, but good on them.
#2
She decided she no longer wanted to take care of her cat of ~5 years, and casually mentioned she was going to drop him off at the local animal shelter. When I told her it was a "high-kill" shelter (putting animals to sleep if they haven't been claimed or adopted within **three days**)...
...She freaking **SHRUGGED HER SHOULDERS** and went to get the cat carrier. The friendship was over then, but I convinced her to take him to a no-kill shelter (relies a lot on fostering) about 45 minutes away. Oh, but she wasn't feeling well enough to drive--could I? She'd *totally* pay for my gas (uh-huh, sure you will). But, ya know, I still cared about her *cat,* so we did that.
There was an eight-dollar ($**8**!!!) "surrender" charge for people who were giving up their own pets, so that the shelter could get the cat's name and med. history, etc.
Without missing a beat, she said, "Oh, this is just a stray I found in [our town], but since they have a high-kill shelter, I convinced my friend to come along to drop it off."
The woman working there smiled, called her a "kind soul" and gave her a sticker. She broke into a huge, winning smile and said, as if shyly: "Wow, thanks **so much.** You know, you're the fourth person to tell me that this week! Maybe I should try to start believing it, haha."
She didn't even say goodbye to **HER CAT**: just turned around and walked out.
I was so bewildered--not to mention *pissed*--that I simply followed her back to my car, didn't say anything on the way home, and just avoided her from then on. In retrospect, I wish I'd told the shelter people the truth and paid them the 8 bucks, but I was sort of in shock.
How cold can you *be???* Ugh.
#3
I was run over by a drunk driver years back. Died temporarily and had to be revived at the hospital. Both my brothers told my best friend of over 20 years what happened. Not once did he reach out to see how I was or ask if I was ok or wished me well. I was hurt by it, but tried to make some sort of sense of it, like maybe he just didn’t know what to say or he was shocked by the news or he wanted to give me space to recover.
Months later I’m home but still in crutches and can barely move without a great deal of pain. Reached out to my friend on the phone, talked a bit and asked if he felt like coming over to watch a movie, play some games and just hang out. I was lonely and missed him. He seemed enthused but asked if I could WALK to his house in December on icy roads barely able to hobble around on crutches to hang out there instead.
He lived 0.2 miles from me and couldn’t drive or walk the roughly 5 minutes to my house.
I stopped talking to him shortly after.
#4
Being a single mom, Hadn’t seen my good friend in months. we planned a night out so I hired a babysitter and drove one hour to her home. My friend was a half an hour late and when she arrived, she was with her and married boyfriend, and she said she had to get something for him. She went in the bedroom with him and closed the door. I heard, giggling and laughing. I left. Not like I was paying a babysitter so I could sit alone in her apartment while she has sex with a married guy.
#5
Never called back after my son died-I phoned her - she said she would call me next week, - never called me back
Susan Atkinson 1 year ago
I had a friend since the 70's. She was married with a daughter. I had 2 sons. When my son was 18 he became paraplegic from a cold. He was in hospital for 2 months. She never went to see him. She didn't call me. When I called her she asked if I wanted to hang with her a bunch of our girl friends. After we arrived she did nothing but berate me for not being my "normal ' self. 9 years later my 2nd son died. She didn't even come to the funeral.
#6
Friends for over a decade. I was her maid of honour. She had 3 children with her husband, whom I was also very good friends with. I was very close with the kids, they called me auntie. I worked for her out of a home office. Watched the marriage deteriorate. She started a relationship with one of her clients after the marriage ended. She then started to treat her children like a burden. The new relationship was (and still is, to the best of my knowledge) more important than her children.
When someone starts to severely neglect their children for a new exciting f**k boy, I have to walk away.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 1 year ago
The person(s) who suffered the most here isn’t OP, but the children :( They lost the love and attention of their mother AND their “auntie”.
#7
Around COVID he got super into politics and tried to turn any topic of discussion into an argument even when it was clear nobody wanted to talk about it.
deanna woods 1 year ago
Covid should have never ever become a political issue and it's ridiculous that it did.
#8
Maybe not anything dramatic but my best friend from university came back to visit his parents who live in the same city as me and we wanted to have dinner. I knew he was super flakey in university, so I made sure I kept my week open because I knew he wouldn't know when he was available until the last minute. I was so excited to introduce him to my fiancé and show him our new house. We got everything for a really nice dinner.
The day before we had planned to have dinner, he texted me that he didn't feel like driving over from his parents' house (30 min) the next day because "he might be tired". I was mad that he was flaking on such important plans, but I offered to bring all the stuff for dinner and drive out to him instead. He said, "No thanks."
I realized that he really didn't care about anything that was going on in my life and was still as immature as he had been in university. I decided it wasn't a friendship I wanted to maintain anymore.
#9
When I was in high school, I had a new friend who at 18 had just gotten married to a guy I already knew. He apparently met her in California during the summer and brought her home. We got along great she was very outgoing and quickly made friends. She was always going around flashing money, and out of pure curiosity. I asked how she always had money if she did not have a job. She asked me the same, at which I retorted that I did have a job. Apparently her husband’s mother was going through end of life cancer care. There was nothing more they could do for her, other than prescribe her strong painkillers to keep her as comfortable as possible. I later on found out that she was stealing and selling her pain meds.
Nice Beast Ludo 1 year ago
That's horrific. There is a special place in hell for people stealing pain medication from people with terminal illness or excruciating pain. I used to be addicted to opiates and NEVER EVER would I be able to do that to someone. I Could never live with myself knowing I was causing someone to suffer a lot worse than me. If I ever got that bad off I hope I would rob a pharmacy first...at least that doesn't hurt any one person. Clean since 2010
#10
I had one where the guy was a horrendous drunk. Super sensitive to alcohol and would very easily slip into blackout status. When he would get drunk, he just wanted to f**k with people and be a s**t disturber.
One night he was pretty drunk and we didn't feel like f*****g with with so we went out without him. We come home around 11 that night and he had a bunch of sketchy people in our house that we're also obnoxiously drunk. He was almost passed out on the couch after he had burned a huge hole in our carpet after going into my room and getting my hookah setup. I go upstairs and there are just random people I had never met just chilling out in the random bedrooms. Some people smoking [illegal substances] on my bed. Others [taking more illegal substances] off the toilet reservoir cap in my bathroom.
One random drunk guy was screaming at someone on the phone and gave the person on the phone our address and told them to bring everyone over.
We kicked everyone out which of course was a huge scene and conflict.
We booted the guy out the next day. Haven't talked to him since
#11
She was a cat hoarder and when I talked her into giving up 20 she said that would help making space for the fall litters (outdoor feral). I gave up. She had 120 cats inside her house.
Nice Beast Ludo 1 year ago
You should have called animal control. No way could those cats live safely or happily and especially not be healthy in that environment and the shelters would have them all spayed/neutered.
#13
A friend told me to invest in a startup biotech company so I spent $5k on it. The company was due to release their phase 3 clinical trial result in a few days and during that entire time, he told me to sell because he suspected the result would be bad. I didn't sell it and the result was very good. I turned that $5k which grew to $12k into $60k. He sold his shares and out of jealousy, he reported me to the SEC for insider trading.
#14
Best friends for a decade. I got a job on the other side of the world, met someone, and had kids. Decided against moving back. He HATED my significant other because “he stole you from me.”
Cherry on top? He’s a twitch streamer with a decent following and anytime he gets drunk or high he goes on long winded rants about me PUBLICLY. I’m too old to put up with that kind of nonsense.
Nice Beast Ludo 1 year ago
That's so weird. One mention of me negatively online in any fashion would be it for me
#15
They tried to be my friend only when they needed something. Outside of that, they'd pretty much forget about my existence.
#16
My best friend of 10 years and her husband had a falling out with my brother because my brother chose to stay out of a situation they were having with someone else, another mutual friend of ours. He didn’t wanna get involved. I agreed he shouldn’t get involved. They got so nasty and bitter about it all over time, and ended up lying to my brothers new wife and told her he cheated on her with one of our other friends. I knew this not to be true at all. They continued to make up stories and lie to her about him and it eventually destroyed their marriage because it created mistrust and conflict. His wife already had a lot of mental health struggles and it made it worse for her. They eventually divorced.
I cut them out of my life. Since then, they have apologized and admitted to making up all the stories out of hurt and bitterness that my brother wouldn’t take their side in the conflict they were having with someone else, but it is all just too late. My brothers marriage was destroyed and so was our friendship. No coming back from that. By the way, my brother didn’t get involved because they were the ones in the wrong and if he told them that, imagine how much worse their revenge would be! They’re unhinged. And their own marriage has since fallen apart. Karma.
#17
About 12 years ago:
I went home on leave for the first time in a year (I was military) and made plans to go out to a bar with one of my best friends. We hung out for like 30 mins and then she got an offer to go [take illegal substances] at someone’s house.
If doing [illegal substances] was more important than seeing someone you claim is one of your best friends that you haven’t seen in a year, it shows me how important our friendship is.
I haven’t seen her since.
Nice Beast Ludo 1 year ago
Drug addiction is a beast and will eventually come before anything and anyone
#18
Make a drunken racist rant (overnight hours) on my Facebook wall. Before I could delete the post (it was posted overnight), someone screenshotted it.
I was later fired for said post. Former friend had no remorse and said "it was a joke." Using the N word is never a joke.
Ended a 12 year friendship.
Mike Fitzpatrick 1 year ago
I will never understand why people remain signed in to SM on their devices.
#19
Kept being toxic to me because I wasn’t financially well off like they were.
I never took or asked for anything.
But they kept being a b***h because I couldn’t go on holidays and trips or do fun outings. I just quit talking to her.
Nice Beast Ludo 1 year ago
I had a friend who always had money from "daddy" and would always want me to gobout with her to expensive places. I was broke and working 3 jobs to pay my rent. She always insisted I go anyway and said "please??? Please?? I'll pay!! I don't mind!!" So ok- fine. This happened like 12 times. I was not using her or anything most times I just wanted to buy my own alcohol and chill at my apartment. One day she brought her friend over so they could laugh at how poor I was. It was embarrassing. I stopped talking to her and she got really mad and sent me a message that I owe her $250. And she would like a check by the end of the week or we are no longer friends. Ok fine...bye.
#20
I started to realize his talk about punishing people who don’t do things his way was neither humour nor exaggeration.
#21
Best friend of decades was diagnosed with diabetes, but chose not to be compliant with treatment/insulin. They had lots of complications and ended up on dialysis and losing their vision.
Friend didnt drive, so I always picked them up and we'd go about our business. We'd go out and they'd ask if I could help them run an errand to do some shopping - and when they came out ofnthe store, it was with bags of chips and chocolate bars. It made me feel like I was helping them [end] themselves. I would have taken a bullet for this person, but I just couldn't help feeling like I was being complicit in their death. I had to stop seeing them. And it broke me. A few months later, they got an infection and with all the health issues, they didn't survive.
I am still crushed thinking about it.
#22
constantly lied and belittled me and one day she slapped me in the face IN PUBLIC “as a joke” as a replacement for “Hello”. like an actual hard slap that left my face burning. (both women)
#23
He was making fun of my psychosis that I was experiencing after my ex gf died of covid. He also became an anti vaxxer
#24
She’s a hardcore alcoholic and pathological liar. Like, she will lie about random stupid stuff that doesn’t even matter. I’ve let it go for the most part because aside from that, she was a great friend and the lies were never malicious or anything like that, just very annoying. That’s all until one night at 3am, she texted me and told me that she had terminal brain cancer and please not to tell anyone. I knew in the back of my head that she was lying. I tried prying more and asking a bunch of questions the next day but she kinda went MIA for a little bit and when she did respond, she kinda changed the subject. After a few weeks, I texted her boyfriend and said I was worried about her mental state after getting the diagnosis. He was like wtf she doesn’t have cancer. Then she reached out to me in minutes and apologized and said she didn’t remember telling me that. Like, WTF. I told her she was sick and needed to see a professional and get help and broke off the friendship.
#25
She was unvaccinated and refused to take a covid test before seeing me. My mother was terminally ill and severely immuno-compromised, so I was absolutely trying to minimise the risk of getting covid so I could still see my Mum.
She refused to take a test, twice, despite kind and calm requests and explanations, on the basis that she "didn't want to get a sinus infection." (This was in the time of nasal swabs, not mouth swabs, for covid tests. You know, those nasal swabs that are sterile and can't cause infection.)
I'm 100% sure that it wasn't about a sinus infection. It was about control. She had been annoyed because I hadn't validated her anti-vax stance in the past.
Similarly, I know she wanted more validation for her religious views, which she'd acquired in her 30s and which I didn't share. I'd told her that I was happy her faith made her happy, but I think she wanted me to truly share her beliefs. I'd also said that her sister's bisexuality was "fine with me" when she'd stated that a wedding of 2 women was "not what God wants."
I think all of those different views just threatened the way she saw the world, and how she saw herself.
Her last texts thanked me for "sharing my views" re covid and it's potential to kill my Mum, then became pseudo-concerned when I didn't reply. I read the whole situation as "I want to say whatever I want to you, but I want to still feel like a nice person, so please reply and give me that validation."
I didn't reply to her, but I still ask myself whether the mature thing to do would have been to clearly reply and state that I didn't want to stay in contact. It's taken me until now (over a year later) to see through the pain and formulate what I might have said.
We'd been friends since the first days of high school. 20+ years. In essence we just aquired very different views from each other as adults, but I can't pretend her attitude towards my Mum, and towards the horrible journey my family had to take, wasn't devastating.
Life is a bloody painful journey at times, that's for sure.
silowew628@picvw.com 1 year ago
Funny how everyone who says they know what the invisible sky man wants or thinks know that he agrees with everything they do and hates their enemies the same. Funny how it works out that way.
#26
Best friend of 10 years Would steal money from me and try and get with any girl I was with behind my back. It becomes disrespectful to yourself if you let it continue best decision I ever made
#27
Always taking. All human relationships should go work both ways. I don't care if it's friendship or more.
Satan herself 1 year ago
I knew someone like that. Exactly like that. Cutting them out of my life was one of the best decisions I everade
#28
Didn't contact me for over a year even though I was going through a very rough time. I was always the one instigating communication and finally had enough.
Dr Robert Neville 1 year ago
Been there seen it done it. He's tried to get back in contact a few times (took him 18 months to realise I'd given up on him). Sorry mate ring me back after nearly 5 years isn't adequate.
#29
There was some "make america white again" nonsense I figured I could steer him away from.
Turns out the slippery slope is also really steep.
By the time he was yelling about whites becoming a minority and I was asking him if that's bad because minorities in this country are treated poorly I knew we weren't friends anymore.
Libstak 1 year ago (edited)
On the world stage, white is a minority frankly and as a white person I am perfectly fine with that, we are not in any way special because we have less melanin in our skin ffs, it's just one of millions of genetic individualities that appear and does nothing for our brains, which are not unique in any useful way whatsoever...except that melanin maybe helps in sleeping pills but hey, whatever.
#30
Burnt my table. She decided to just light matches and drop them on my table, without putting them out. When a fire started and she was instructed by two people to NOT pour soda on it, since it would bubble and leave a worse mark and that they would go get water sitting two feet away, she poured soda on it. Fun times. She also talked s**t about her close friends behind their backs so needless to say I dropped her.
#31
She was bossy, overbearing, and manipulative, which I tried to look past because I loved her so much. Then she screwed her sick cousin's fiancée and he left the cousin for her. She wanted me to be supportive, and I honestly just couldn't. It was the last straw.
#32
I told a friend something in confidence. It blew up in my face at work. I asked her directly just to hear it from her, if she told anyone. She didn’t answer me. No one else could have done it. I told her she betrayed my trust and I was done with our friendship. Never looked back.
Just to add, she was not a work friend but she knew someone at my work and told them.
#33
Might sound dumb, but I started playing a video game he enjoyed (Apex Legends). But I wasn't as good as him, obv, cuz he had a year of experience over me. So I started grinding really hard to improve my aim, game sense, etc. I put 800h into it during the 2020 year of lockdown periods. When I was finally about his level, and we started teaming up competitively, he still talked to me like I was brand new. I realized that no matter how good I got, he'd blame me for anytime we lost. Sucks, cuz I didn't have to play that game, but I did, and I lost a friend for it.
Crybabyartist 1 year ago
Might have played directly against your friend in a private game and beat them hard enough to shut them up.
#35
He married a girl who is incredibly hard to get along with and turned into a robot.
and_a_touch_of_the_’tism 1 year ago
Ngl this is actually a decent picture, and I haven’t seen it before. Kudos.
What do you think ?
R Dennis 1 year ago
I am a poc in the U.S. I used to work in a middle class city and have to take two buses home because I lived in the inner city. When I was 16-17, I would leave work at almost midnight to walk a couple miles to get to the bus. There were several times I was followed by people in cars. I was so scared I started carrying a wrench in my coat. When Trayvon Martin was murdered, it hit me hard because I had been in his position and the idea I could be murdered for minding my own business left me shook. My friend posted about him being a thug and basically getting what he deserved. I told him that was hurtful and about my experiences. He never acknowledged what I wrote or stopped.
Hokuloa 1 year ago
All valuable lessons in being able to tell the difference between *acquaintances* and real *friends.*
Wicked Witch 1 year ago (edited)
I had a friend of over 20 years. A friend that I helped through her divorce, and she was also a matron of honor in my wedding. I was always the one to keep in touch; she would never call or make an effort to stay in contact. Even if she knew I was going through a tough time. I finally decided that I would wait for her to call me to see if she would and how long it would take (maybe I was asking for it, IDK). She never did. I then decided after 2 years (yes 2 without contact) that I would text her to see how she was doing. I thought 'well ok, I know that I will be making the effort'. I also thought it was worth it. Anyway, as we were catching up, I explained that my youngest child came out as transgender and suddenly I wasn't getting any response. Nothing. For context I will explain that I always thought that she was very non-judgmental she is bi-sexual herself. She always seemed accepting of others, and I thought that she would support other LGTBQAI+ people. I was just surprised. That was the end.
R Dennis 1 year ago
I am a poc in the U.S. I used to work in a middle class city and have to take two buses home because I lived in the inner city. When I was 16-17, I would leave work at almost midnight to walk a couple miles to get to the bus. There were several times I was followed by people in cars. I was so scared I started carrying a wrench in my coat. When Trayvon Martin was murdered, it hit me hard because I had been in his position and the idea I could be murdered for minding my own business left me shook. My friend posted about him being a thug and basically getting what he deserved. I told him that was hurtful and about my experiences. He never acknowledged what I wrote or stopped.
Hokuloa 1 year ago
All valuable lessons in being able to tell the difference between *acquaintances* and real *friends.*
Wicked Witch 1 year ago (edited)
I had a friend of over 20 years. A friend that I helped through her divorce, and she was also a matron of honor in my wedding. I was always the one to keep in touch; she would never call or make an effort to stay in contact. Even if she knew I was going through a tough time. I finally decided that I would wait for her to call me to see if she would and how long it would take (maybe I was asking for it, IDK). She never did. I then decided after 2 years (yes 2 without contact) that I would text her to see how she was doing. I thought 'well ok, I know that I will be making the effort'. I also thought it was worth it. Anyway, as we were catching up, I explained that my youngest child came out as transgender and suddenly I wasn't getting any response. Nothing. For context I will explain that I always thought that she was very non-judgmental she is bi-sexual herself. She always seemed accepting of others, and I thought that she would support other LGTBQAI+ people. I was just surprised. That was the end.
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