Friend Spends Whole Trip Treating Woman Rudely, She Can’t Understand Why, Discussion Ensues
Traveling with friends can be a fun adventure, but it can also test the limits of any friendship. The excitement of exploring new places together often comes with the challenge of navigating different personalities and preferences. It’s like throwing a magnifying glass on your relationship – every little quirk and habit gets amplified, especially if you share a room.
Imagine planning a perfect getaway, only to have it turn into a series of misunderstandings and petty squabbles. One netizen found herself in this situation during what was supposed to be a fun weekend trip.
More info: Mumsnet
Woman considers ending their friendship of 15 years after her friend acts like a jerk on their trip to Milan for no reason, ruining the vacation
Image credits: freepik (not the actual photo)
The woman plans the entire trip, including activities, only to be met by her friend’s grumpy attitude and constant refusals for all her suggestions
Image credits: freepik (not the actual photo)
“Why didn’t we just do this yesterday?!”: the woman figures out the metro system, saving them a lot of money, only to be blamed for not doing it sooner
Image credits: handlervid85 (not the actual photo)
Later, the woman suggests they have cocktails on the balcony overlooking the Milan cathedral but the friend flat-out refuses
Image credits: mycongratations
The woman is annoyed and confused by her friend’s nasty behavior that ruined her vacation, saying she’s considering ending her 15-year friendship over it
One weekend, the OP (original poster) and her friend embarked on an exciting trip to Milan, filled with pizza, shopping, and a little bit of sightseeing. They arrived early Friday afternoon, with plans to return on Sunday. Things kicked off smoothly, until the first hiccup.
On Friday, the two friends spent a lot of money on expensive taxis, as it was their first day and they were not yet familiar with the public transport system. But by Saturday, the OP decided to take some photos of the metro stops, figuring out the system. When she finally mastered the metro, the friend snapped: “Why didn’t we just do this yesterday?!”. After not lifting a finger to help her friend figure out the public transit system, she even blamed her for having to spend too much money on taxis the day before.
Back at the hotel, the OP was excited for a relaxing spa session. Their hotel had a fabulous spa, included in their booking, so the OP reserved an hour of pampering for the two of them. But her friend couldn’t stop worrying about hidden charges, even after the OP promised to foot the bill, if they were to be charged. And surprise, surprise, the spa was indeed free. Any apology from the friend? No, not a chance.
On Saturday afternoon, the OP asked her friend what she wanted to do that day, only to be met with an “I’m not bothered” shrug. So, the OP suggested sipping cocktails on a balcony with a view of the Milan cathedral. Sounds perfect, right? You would think so, but not for the friend, who flat-out refused: “No, I don’t want to do that,” she said. What a buzzkill.
The OP, confused about her friend’s attitude, couldn’t figure out where it came from, as nothing significant happened on the trip to cause such nasty behavior. Despite being stuck with Ms. Grumpy, the OP kept her cool, staying positive and hoping things would improve the next day. But by Sunday morning, the tension between the two friends was even thicker.
The final straw came on the way to the airport when the OP suggested taking a taxi to the bus stop, because of her painful knee injury. Despite the fact that the OP offered to pay for the ride, her friend insisted on walking. Thankfully, on the plane, they sat at opposite ends, a small blessing given the circumstances.
Back home, the OP was left questioning her role in the fiasco. She couldn’t pinpoint a specific event that justified the friend’s nasty behavior throughout their trip that was originally her idea.
Image credits: lookstudio (not the actual photo)
While traveling can be an incredible adventure, it often comes with its fair share of stress. The excitement of discovering new places is often overshadowed by challenges such as disrupted routines, language barriers, and culture shock. When you’re trying to navigate an unfamiliar environment, stress can creep in, which can affect your mood, behavior, and overall experience.
Experts explain that “travel stress is related to the situational pressures, anxieties, or challenges of travelling. Certain amounts of stress are a normal part of everyday life but problems or situations you encounter while travelling, whether big or small, can become more difficult to manage when you are in a new or unfamiliar environment.” Recognizing these stressors and learning how to manage them can make your travels more enjoyable for everyone involved.
So, was the OP being unreasonable in considering ending the friendship? It’s a tough call. Friendships should withstand some turbulence, but continuous negativity and lack of support can be deal-breakers.
Ending a friendship is never easy, but sometimes it’s necessary for your well-being. Recognizing when a friendship is no longer healthy is the first step. According to experts, if a friendship repeatedly makes you feel unappreciated or disrespected, it’s time to re-evaluate it.
Some common signs that it might be time to move on include feeling like you’re not a priority, giving more than you take, or feeling anxious and negative around your friend. “As you change and grow, you may find that old friendships no longer fit. You may drift apart naturally or realize suddenly that you’re in an unhealthy relationship,” experts explain.
Whether it’s dealing with travel stress, differing budgets, or just the inevitable hiccups that come with any trip, traveling with friends can be a real test of patience. So, before you pack your bags for that next big adventure, prepare yourself for the highs and lows that come with exploring the world with your friends.
So, what do you think? Was the OP justified in considering cutting ties, or should she give her friend another chance? Share your thoughts in the comments below.
People in the comments side with the woman, saying that she didn’t deserve to be treated that way and that the friend’s behavior is unacceptable
Poll Question
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Before ending the friendship I would at least try and find out what was wrong with her that weekend.
Agreed, there may have been a miscommunication about expenditure as OP mentioned using public tport instead of a taxi after their first taxi trip. Maybe OP jumped at the taxi without her friend really being on board with that and failed to consult I don't know, it seems she is annoyed specifically at OP about something.
Load More Replies...I have a good few reasons for travelling alone, after reaching some age. This post is one of them. I wouldn't end the "friendshiep", if OP feels okay with her on everyday life going to have a glass of wine, make some shoppings, chat about not important things. But never ever would go with her on a trip, 2 days or 2 weeks.... doesn't matter. And to anyone travelling to Europe, yes, even the eastern part of it, Please check online the public transport possibilities first in that city, where are you going. European countries have excellent public transportation, compared to some other car-focused countries. There are even very discounted offers for 2-3 days visits in most european touristy visited cities, what includes unlimited public transport with discounts for museums and so on. In european countries the public trransport network is fairly developed, and you can spare a ton of money using it, instead of taxis.
I bet you anything that "friendship" has always consisted on one person getting all the advantages (the friend) and the other person (OP) always organising, paying, accepting and putting up with her "friend" whims and bad mood.
Load More Replies...And what did she say when you talked to her about it? Oh, right, neither of you has any communications skills.
Communication only works when both want it to work. The way this is written it seems the friend didn't even want to try and address anything, so what could OP have actually done?
Load More Replies...I'm not a great traveler so I usually just travel alone, both to save the other person/people from me and vice versa. While I don't need an intinerary if my destination is just to explore and whatnot, I like to plan ahead and make sure the things I can control to make my experience less stressful and easy are in place. I hated then when my old band would travel back to our hometown for shows, they would say be here at 11am and then we wouldn't leave until like 3pm. It's an 8+ hours drive and we'd pull into town really late and it annoyed me to no end. I like to know what time I need to leave, how I'm getting there, where I'm staying, etc. Too many of my friends are like "we'll figure it out." NAH. I'll just travel alone.
I would never travel with her anywhere again and I would stop speaking to her as well. She sure would have a lot of explaining and apologizing if she wanted me to stay friends with her. I don't put up with anyone acting like that. She would not see me again.
I would demand explanation, under the threat of ending the friendship.
Something similar happened to me. I offered to treat her for her birthday and take her out for the weekend. Asked her what she wanted to do and she said anything. Turned out anything meant I was supposed to read her mind and know what she wanted. I chose the opposite and she spent the entire day and night sulking and complaining. She had her husband pick her up the next day. I lost a lot of respect for her and our friendship immediately started evaporating until it was completely gone.
Why can't people look at someone who has been their friend for years and years and say "Have I done something to anger you? Because you are being quite a jerk to me."
Maybe the "friend" expected to pick every event, every restaurant and so on, but was slow to choose and OP suggested fun stuff that she hadn't thought of. Or money. But who goes to Milan on a shoestring budget?
I wouldn't end the friendship but I will never travel with that friend again. Some people are simply bad travel companions.
Sounds to me she may have been worried about money and doesn't like taking handouts.
If you are worried about money, you don't go to Milan on holidays. Or you tell your friend you only have a certain amount to spend. Adults speak and explain. If they don't, it's their own problem. Nobody cares.
Load More Replies...Before ending the friendship I would at least try and find out what was wrong with her that weekend.
Agreed, there may have been a miscommunication about expenditure as OP mentioned using public tport instead of a taxi after their first taxi trip. Maybe OP jumped at the taxi without her friend really being on board with that and failed to consult I don't know, it seems she is annoyed specifically at OP about something.
Load More Replies...I have a good few reasons for travelling alone, after reaching some age. This post is one of them. I wouldn't end the "friendshiep", if OP feels okay with her on everyday life going to have a glass of wine, make some shoppings, chat about not important things. But never ever would go with her on a trip, 2 days or 2 weeks.... doesn't matter. And to anyone travelling to Europe, yes, even the eastern part of it, Please check online the public transport possibilities first in that city, where are you going. European countries have excellent public transportation, compared to some other car-focused countries. There are even very discounted offers for 2-3 days visits in most european touristy visited cities, what includes unlimited public transport with discounts for museums and so on. In european countries the public trransport network is fairly developed, and you can spare a ton of money using it, instead of taxis.
I bet you anything that "friendship" has always consisted on one person getting all the advantages (the friend) and the other person (OP) always organising, paying, accepting and putting up with her "friend" whims and bad mood.
Load More Replies...And what did she say when you talked to her about it? Oh, right, neither of you has any communications skills.
Communication only works when both want it to work. The way this is written it seems the friend didn't even want to try and address anything, so what could OP have actually done?
Load More Replies...I'm not a great traveler so I usually just travel alone, both to save the other person/people from me and vice versa. While I don't need an intinerary if my destination is just to explore and whatnot, I like to plan ahead and make sure the things I can control to make my experience less stressful and easy are in place. I hated then when my old band would travel back to our hometown for shows, they would say be here at 11am and then we wouldn't leave until like 3pm. It's an 8+ hours drive and we'd pull into town really late and it annoyed me to no end. I like to know what time I need to leave, how I'm getting there, where I'm staying, etc. Too many of my friends are like "we'll figure it out." NAH. I'll just travel alone.
I would never travel with her anywhere again and I would stop speaking to her as well. She sure would have a lot of explaining and apologizing if she wanted me to stay friends with her. I don't put up with anyone acting like that. She would not see me again.
I would demand explanation, under the threat of ending the friendship.
Something similar happened to me. I offered to treat her for her birthday and take her out for the weekend. Asked her what she wanted to do and she said anything. Turned out anything meant I was supposed to read her mind and know what she wanted. I chose the opposite and she spent the entire day and night sulking and complaining. She had her husband pick her up the next day. I lost a lot of respect for her and our friendship immediately started evaporating until it was completely gone.
Why can't people look at someone who has been their friend for years and years and say "Have I done something to anger you? Because you are being quite a jerk to me."
Maybe the "friend" expected to pick every event, every restaurant and so on, but was slow to choose and OP suggested fun stuff that she hadn't thought of. Or money. But who goes to Milan on a shoestring budget?
I wouldn't end the friendship but I will never travel with that friend again. Some people are simply bad travel companions.
Sounds to me she may have been worried about money and doesn't like taking handouts.
If you are worried about money, you don't go to Milan on holidays. Or you tell your friend you only have a certain amount to spend. Adults speak and explain. If they don't, it's their own problem. Nobody cares.
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