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We all make fools out of ourselves every now and then. Nobody is safe from that unwelcome sense of anxiety once you realized the thing you just said makes zero sense. But things that leave your mouth, whether IRL or online, do stay there, oftentimes forever.

And there’s a whole corner of Reddit, r/S***AmericansSay, dedicated entirely to the mission of collecting the stupidest, funniest, and sometimes embarrassing cases of people being so convinced they know better when they couldn’t be further away from the truth.

So let’s ready ourselves for the ensued hilarity, ‘cause we are about to have a fair share of it, trust me.

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#2

“Who Was The First Country On Planet Earth To Ban Slavery? That’s Right, America”

“Who Was The First Country On Planet Earth To Ban Slavery? That’s Right, America”

Aironwood Report

There’s an abundance of scientific evidence that shows humans are poor judges of their own abilities, whether it’s their sense of humor or grammar. In fact, psychologists believe that we are more blind to our own failings than we realize. This idea comes from the 1999 study in which David Dunning and Justin Kruger from Cornell University, New York, tested if people who lack skills and abilities are also more likely to lack awareness of their lack of ability.

#3

You're On The Internet, Which Is American

You're On The Internet, Which Is American

Nulligravida Report

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Sum Guy
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The internet has helped us see how much of a total s**t show the USA is... they can't hide behind the propaganda machine we call movies

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The results of the tests led the authors to the interpretation that accurately assessing one's skill level relies on some of the same core abilities as actually performing that skill. It led them to the conclusion that the least competent maybe suffering a double deficit.

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#6

Well Allocated Funds

Well Allocated Funds

lNoahl Report

“Not only are they incompetent, but they lack the mental tools to judge their own incompetence,” Kruger and Dunning thought. During the course of four individual tests run on participants, the scientists discovered that “People who scored in the lowest percentiles on tests of grammar, humor, and logic also tended to dramatically overestimate how well they had performed (their actual test scores placed them in the 12th percentile, but they estimated that their performance placed them in the 62nd percentile).”

#7

Pridemonth

Pridemonth

unknown Report

#8

'People Who Leave Their Phones Set To Military Time Are War Criminals'

'People Who Leave Their Phones Set To Military Time Are War Criminals'

reddit.com Report

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Rick
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I was older than I would EVER care to publicly admit when I learned that “military time” I often heard referred was not some secret, complicated way of working out the time you’re only privy to having served in the army but simply the reading of a 24 hour clock.

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Dunning shared his impressions in an article for Pacific Standard: "In many cases, incompetence does not leave people disoriented, perplexed, or cautious. Instead, the incompetent are often blessed with an inappropriate confidence, buoyed by something that feels to them like knowledge." The phenomenon is known as the Dunning-Kruger Effect and most of us have surely encountered numerous cases of it in real life.

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#9

Go To Panama, This Is America

Go To Panama, This Is America

Pontoisien Report

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Hans
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I would be tempted to argue that THIS is the virtual, borderless world....

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#11

“More People Use Imperial Than Metric”

“More People Use Imperial Than Metric”

Corporal-Porpoise Report

#13

People Engaging Me In German Because I Look German

People Engaging Me In German Because I Look German

Mr_-_X Report

#15

Where Does It Say In The Constitution Or Any Of The Amendments That Eating Is A Human Right?

Where Does It Say In The Constitution Or Any Of The Amendments That Eating Is A Human Right?

Liam_Noble Report

#16

"More People Know About Our Smallest State Vermont Then The Amsterdam"

"More People Know About Our Smallest State Vermont Then The Amsterdam"

Particular_Edge2308 Report

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#17

“We Will Never Rewrite The Constitution”

“We Will Never Rewrite The Constitution”

reddit.com Report

#18

Your Haircuts Are Un-American

Your Haircuts Are Un-American

3Squareheadz Report

#20

Hmmmmmmm

Hmmmmmmm

Classic-CJ Report

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Eslamala
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Sure, just like "america" celebrates other countries' independence day 🙄

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#21

Why Is Munich Spelled "München" On Signs In Germany?

Why Is Munich Spelled "München" On Signs In Germany?

Merlin428bretz Report

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Marianne
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Munich citizen here. I can confirm that we do, in fact, write signs in our own language. We are crazy people!

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#22

“...your Hip Would Break Because Their Medical Staff Is Garage...”

“...your Hip Would Break Because Their Medical Staff Is Garage...”

ThatMusicKid Report

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Luther von Wolfen
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I know people who have travelled to other countries to get medical/dental care because the air fair and other expenses plus cost of treatment were cheaper than in US. It is literally true.

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#23

Do You Guys Have Refrigerators?

Do You Guys Have Refrigerators?

anotherwankusername Report

#24

"Offended By Our Patriotism, Wattpad Girl?"

"Offended By Our Patriotism, Wattpad Girl?"

KWAKUDATSU Report

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#25

The Titanic Is Just A Movie, Right?

The Titanic Is Just A Movie, Right?

unknown Report

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Rick
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Canadians also think Star Wars was completely made up so I wouldn’t worry too much about what they think.

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#27

“I Am In Rhode Island”. “Nice, Ever Been To The USA Before”?

“I Am In Rhode Island”. “Nice, Ever Been To The USA Before”?

reddit.com Report

#28

Biden's America

Biden's America

unknown Report

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Rick
Community Member
3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

*Random person falls down in Greece* “Biden’s America”.

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#29

"At Least American Toilets Aren't Just Holes In The Ground"

"At Least American Toilets Aren't Just Holes In The Ground"

RogueArtemis Report

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Ryan Deschanel
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Doesn't Angel Merkel just pee in the Spree ? Doesn't the queen's butler empty her chamber pot in the Thames every morning ?

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#30

What Does He Care? He's Not A Us Citizen, He's Not Effected

What Does He Care? He's Not A Us Citizen, He's Not Effected

sandiercy Report

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Foxxy (The Original)
Community Member
3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I didn’t realise that the US was global, oh wait, they do have the World Series which only the US plays in. so I guess it makes sense lol.

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#31

Would Love To See Some Of These Countries Try To F With Us

Would Love To See Some Of These Countries Try To F With Us

louckak Report

#32

“The White House Is Bigger Than All The Countries You Named”

“The White House Is Bigger Than All The Countries You Named”

theelleintraveller Report

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#33

"I'd Rather Receive False Information..."

"I'd Rather Receive False Information..."

Theemuts Report

#35

Commie Divas

Commie Divas

Gerceval_ Report

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N G
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Ugh, this doesn't belong here. "Soccer" is a British word. Yes, the Americans took it and ran with it (no pun intended), but it originated in Oxford in about 1890. Americans didn't invent it.

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#36

(Sad) Mistake A North Korean Flag For A Texan Flag

(Sad) Mistake A North Korean Flag For A Texan Flag

GriffinFTW Report

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Gemma
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Plot twist: they're holding a sign denouncing Kim Jong-un.

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#37

But We Can Pock Whatever Doctor Or Healthcare Insurer We Want! We Win

But We Can Pock Whatever Doctor Or Healthcare Insurer We Want! We Win

Mr_-_X Report

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Luther von Wolfen
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

We can pick whatever doctor or hospital we want to be in debt to for the rest of our lives!

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#38

“They Started Faking An Accent”

“They Started Faking An Accent”

ArkhamKnight342 Report

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troufaki13
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Some people believe that the Earth is 2000 years old. This one thinks it's 200 yo apparently

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#39

"[...]although My Ancestry Dna Gives Me Zero Italian Dna On My Dad's Side, I'll Stick With Being 1/4 Italian!"

"[...]although My Ancestry Dna Gives Me Zero Italian Dna On My Dad's Side, I'll Stick With Being 1/4 Italian!"

azulhombre Report

#40

"It's Amazing To See How Few Countries Know That "Soccer" Is The Correct Term"

"It's Amazing To See How Few Countries Know That "Soccer" Is The Correct Term"

Andros1510Ro Report

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#42

Is Mediterranean A Slur To Italians?

Is Mediterranean A Slur To Italians?

big-black-ramarro Report

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Rick
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I’m actually going to start using this! “Ugh, you’re *so* Mediterranean”.

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#43

Are We Acting Like That's Not Possible?

Are We Acting Like That's Not Possible?

DoUEvenCloudDistrict Report

#44

"American Deaths Are Worth More"

"American Deaths Are Worth More"

zzvu Report

#45

European Countries Don't Have Elections As They Are Too Poor To Pay For The Patent Rights

European Countries Don't Have Elections As They Are Too Poor To Pay For The Patent Rights

StrammerMax Report

#46

Wait Other Countries Didn't Have To Sing Their National Anthem Everyday At School For 12 Years???

Wait Other Countries Didn't Have To Sing Their National Anthem Everyday At School For 12 Years???

reddit.com Report

#47

The Real Heros Are The Ones Who Served The Us Military

The Real Heros Are The Ones Who Served The Us Military

A_Cat_Named_Frank Report

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#50

"USA Is Less Racist Than Those Scandinavian Ethnostates''

"USA Is Less Racist Than Those Scandinavian Ethnostates''

snusknugen Report

#51

My Ancestors Are American And They Came From America

My Ancestors Are American And They Came From America

reddit.com Report

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Ryan Deschanel
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Maybe they are a 100% pure native american with a French surname and the Quebec province is a myth ? No. Definitely not. They are just an ignorant idiot.

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#52

Europe Is A Country

Europe Is A Country

unknown Report

#53

"Has Monumentally Contributed More To Mankind Than All Those Noted Combined"

"Has Monumentally Contributed More To Mankind Than All Those Noted Combined"

wienerlegende Report

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Ryan Deschanel
Community Member
3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

China : banknotes and gunpowder. England : steam machines and modern plumbing. France : cameras and vaccines. Arabs : mathematics and astronomy. Germany : cars and printers... And don't get me started about culture, architecture, and arts.

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#54

Rank: Military Spouse

Rank: Military Spouse

Koeienvanger Report

#55

“We Invented The Car”

“We Invented The Car”

reddit.com Report

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#58

"Europeans Have Pretty Much The Exact Same Culture And Genetics"

"Europeans Have Pretty Much The Exact Same Culture And Genetics"

abc_username_123 Report

#59

“Everyone Should Be Put In The Marines. Now”

“Everyone Should Be Put In The Marines. Now”

Faraz_rashid Report

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Indra Servo
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Reminder : kneeling during anthem is legal, while using US flag as clothing is illegal

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#60

"Healthcare Isn't A Human Right"

"Healthcare Isn't A Human Right"

Cuber32 Report

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Something
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

There are far more people using taxi services like they're EMS (not by choice).

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#61

"Good Luck Trying To Be A Billionaire Over There."

"Good Luck Trying To Be A Billionaire Over There."

_Kristian_ Report

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René Kok
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Your changes of becoming a billionaire are higher when education is free.

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#63

Well They Don’t Have Rights In England

Well They Don’t Have Rights In England

MedicalMango5 Report

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Ryan Deschanel
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm sure they think the queen wears a black armor and rides her horse in the streets of London, beheading whatever filthy illiterate peasant does not bow down enough.

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#64

"I Will Not Comply"

"I Will Not Comply"

crispy-aubergine Report

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Something
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

By this logic, refusing to wear a mask will eventually lead to full nudity.

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#66

Futuristic Technology

Futuristic Technology

unknown Report

#67

"Europeans Don't Have Culture"

"Europeans Don't Have Culture"

Appropriate-Ad-9886 Report

#68

You're A Third World Country For A Reason

You're A Third World Country For A Reason

reddit.com Report

#69

Forks Are Uniquely American

Forks Are Uniquely American

unknown Report

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Luther von Wolfen
Community Member
3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

They use Britsticks, which are sticks made of metal that have three or four pointies at one end. For soup, they use souptools, which were invented by Oxford don, Reverend William Archibald Spooner. Every male in England is legally required to have "Archibald" in their name at least once.

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#70

"I Would Like To See You Devote A Tweet To Memorializing The Victims Of 9/11. Thanks"

"I Would Like To See You Devote A Tweet To Memorializing The Victims Of 9/11. Thanks"

charizardine Report

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Ryan Deschanel
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yeah, remember a tragedy which happened 20 years ago in another continent.

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#71

"Come To America Where Our Dialects Are So Different Some Count As Completely Different Languages"

"Come To America Where Our Dialects Are So Different Some Count As Completely Different Languages"

garden_gnostalgic Report

#72

”Why Does Italian Pizza Look So Bad?”

”Why Does Italian Pizza Look So Bad?”

pandaron Report

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#74

If Churchill Was A "Racist"

If Churchill Was A "Racist"

jmcs Report

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Ryan Deschanel
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I would, because it is true. Obviously, it does not mean we should tear their statues down, rename their towns and erase them from history, it does not make their contribution to the american history any less important, but they are not perfect gods and we should be able to mention those facts.

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#75

"If Your Leg Is Broken In Europe - You're Done "

"If Your Leg Is Broken In Europe - You're Done "

The_Meaty_Boosh Report

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Allan Miller
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

And they make the legs different lengths in Europe because the sidewalks are so uneven.

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#76

"My Expensive, Frequent Health Care Is Subsidized At The Expense Of Healthy People. I Think It's Great!" Thief

"My Expensive, Frequent Health Care Is Subsidized At The Expense Of Healthy People. I Think It's Great!" Thief

neeraj8le Report

#77

"You Rarely See Iphones Outside Switzerland"

"You Rarely See Iphones Outside Switzerland"

flowchart68 Report

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Allan Miller
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

In Canada we carve phones out of wood and pretend to use them to impress our friends.

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#78

Only Americans Can Comprehend American Football

Only Americans Can Comprehend American Football

unknown Report

#79

Please Don't Bring This European Style Socialism To America

Please Don't Bring This European Style Socialism To America

reddit.com Report

#80

My Son Died From Covid-19 And I'm Still Voting For Trump

My Son Died From Covid-19 And I'm Still Voting For Trump

emix75 Report

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